Open Post: Hosted By The Grim Aniston
According to the paps, this is Jennifer Aniston wearing some kind of KKK/Orko from He-Man hood while leaving her hotel in NYC today to go shoot that movie about a bitch who makes love to a turkey baster or something.
I'm proud of my fingers, because I know they have the intense urge to type "This is the hottest she's ever looked!" Oops. They failed.
Who knows why Jenny decided to cause a mass amount of attention to herself by trying to look like she's hiding her chin from the cameras? Botox gone wrong? Her $60,000 hairstylist wasn't able to pass a blow dryer through her mop. Or it could be something simple like homegirl just has a herp sore on her mouth. Wait. You usually get those from mouth kissing another human being, right? Yeah, can't be that.
Speaking of herpes, when doing research for this non-story (I SWEAR), I found this question on the hilarious bible of all things hilarious: Yahoo Answers!
Can i get herpes from kissing a girl if she ONLY has it on her vagina?
ok me adn this girl were going out for about a week or so and we started kissing like a regular couple does and then i heard she has herpies i thought it was a rumor but i asked her and she said yeah she thinks, only on her vagina not on the mouth or cold sore and im worried cause im allergic to the metal on ur pants button and now my stomach itches is that the allergicness or acn herps spread even if not touched please help
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Submitted by Oxygen on Tue, 03/24/2009 - 1:03pm.
Submitted by Migraine Sally on Tue, 03/24/2009 - 12:53pm.
Happy Tuesday Horz!!!!
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You too Migraine and everybody else. Migraine, seriously, you always seem to brighten my mood. Between your Happy wishes and your funny ass avie...THANKS
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Awwww, Oxygen, spank you very much! Can you just picture me at my desk, surrounded by documents? Cuz I am!
DG,
I wasn't on all weekend and didn't see the fallout from me drunk posting that secret.
I had kept that one under my fupa for seven months!
Poster in question said it was all good, she kinda got a kick out of being a Blind Item. This was last night in icantrememberthethread.
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Mrs. K. squeezed my ass. I can die happy.
She looks like that monster from the Silent Hill games. Whatever the hell its name is.
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The real LA? (on the right)- http://bp1.blogger.com/_p2jgVV2iZVs/Rwbyb01mwZI/AAAAAAAAAig/aetvoWN5Hbk/...
Uvula
Where is she? I mean, what city? Perhaps one of us Dlisted horz is close (you never know) and could check on her.
ISMU, I don't think it would be bad of you to call the police in your mom's town and have them check on her. You can call a non-emergency number and leave a message. You can usually find the non-emergency police number on a town, township, or municipality's website.
I would do it.
My mom is 83 and I treasure every day I have with her, luckily she only lives 10 miles away.
As for The Herp, my friend had a friend who gave his wife genital herpes when he ate her out while he was sporting a cold sore. Never met the couple but from the way my friend talked about them they were pretty icky to begin with.
Submitted by KD on Tue, 03/24/2009 - 1:10pm.
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We do have one. No message, just a missed call on the ID. So it's weirdness all around and something I'm trying to not get all worked up about but I'm getting really worked up about it.
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If you're so stupid that you can't see a hole that big, then by God you deserve to fall in it. -Morbidosity
Love her Chucks. Are they the slip-ons? I want a pair!
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You know, maybe if you ate more comfort food, you wouldn't have to go around shooting people.
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ISMU- Don't you have an answering machine? I think you can get one for like $20.
Now about Intervention - I didn't see the end of it yesterday. WTF happened to that woman who was hitting herself? That episode was def in the Intervention top 10.
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She was fine while she was in rehab, but after she went home, she relapsed so she decided to divorce her husband. I guess she's been okay since then, though.
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You know, maybe if you ate more comfort food, you wouldn't have to go around shooting people.
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WTF is she doing? Cosmetic surgery gone wrong?
Submitted by zomay on Tue, 03/24/2009 - 1:05pm.
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I wish, bunny. We're 1900 miles away. I just saw her a few weeks ago- took Tug out to meet her.
DG- No, she's really kind of exiled herself.
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If you're so stupid that you can't see a hole that big, then by God you deserve to fall in it. -Morbidosity
Kenny?
Morbid. My dog's name is Morbid.
Submitted by ISprainedMyUvula on Tue, 03/24/2009 - 1:03pm.
Why yes. I didn't want you to worry on that issue either. I hate it when I miss Jon Hamm's late night calls!
I am sure things are fine! : )
It's teh herpeez! Ever body hyde!
Why do people by Ugly things like that?? Yuck!
My friend who had the baby yesterday went code blue after the epidural was administered. She wouldn't let anyone call us (me and her mom).
I told that bitch, "If you had died without letting the people who love you say good-bye I would have dug you up and beat the shit out of you for being such a selfish bitch."
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Mrs. K. squeezed my ass. I can die happy.
Submitted by Rishkin on Tue, 03/24/2009 - 1:04pm.
I just got over the flu and was sweaty for two days and now the bottom of my toes are PEELING..should I ask Yahoo if this is normal?
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Are you on any medicine because my friend had to take some medicine when she got streph throat and every last flake of her skin peeled off! She is as black as night and by the time all her skin got done peeling she was as white as Micheal J!
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smack. smack. sugar smack. give me a smack and ill smack ya back!
Submitted by EastEndGirl on Tue, 03/24/2009 - 1:01pm.
I wanted to apologize for something I inadvetently said in a post that was none of my business.
I also apologized to party involved and I seriously meant no harm as it really was only a guess. : ) I had no business involving myself and I feel horrible if it caused prblems!
ISprainedMyUvula, is there anyway you can visit her? Too far? Maybe you could move her in with you.
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!!!!!HERPES!!!!!
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smack. smack. sugar smack. give me a smack and ill smack ya back!
I just got over the flu and was sweaty for two days and now the bottom of my toes are PEELING..should I ask Yahoo if this is normal?
Are my toes gonna fall off? am I turning into a lizard?
sorry if I gross anyone out, but mah toes are peeling!
ISMU... I hope everything is OK
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Submitted by ISprainedMyUvula on Tue, 03/24/2009 - 1:02pm.
Don't worry yourself unnecessarily. Is there not a neighbor or place you could call where she might be this time of day?
I doubt that's Jen, she never really hides herself like that. And I don't think she gives two shits about JM.
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I'm your huckleberry...BITCH!!
I like her shoes. She has the balls to wear sneakers once in a blue moon. But why cover your face. Unless you have a herpes lip or hicky from a hooker.
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Submitted by Migraine Sally on Tue, 03/24/2009 - 12:53pm.
Happy Tuesday Horz!!!!
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You too Migraine and everybody else. Migraine, seriously, you always seem to brighten my mood. Between your Happy wishes and your funny ass avie...THANKS
*i'm such a fecking faggy*
Submitted by devilgirl on Tue, 03/24/2009 - 12:56pm.
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Are you suggesting that I might have missed Robert Pattinson's call? Shit, now I really want to jump out a window... ;)
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If you're so stupid that you can't see a hole that big, then by God you deserve to fall in it. -Morbidosity
Nobody is answering at home and she's technotarded and cell-less. And as much as I'm freaking, I dont' want to start a chain reaction of freaking by calling anybody else in the family. She's starting to not be really forthcoming with her brothers and such and nobody really knows what's going on with her at any given time. She just kind of glosses it all over.
I just need to take a chill pill and barf and hope it was all just a coincidence.
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If you're so stupid that you can't see a hole that big, then by God you deserve to fall in it. -Morbidosity
Stan,
You have interesting friends.
ISMU,
Somebody in the family must know something if you can't get through to your mom?
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Mrs. K. squeezed my ass. I can die happy.
Jen needs to take a year off, get away from Hollywood and get some good therapy.
Now about Intervention - I didn't see the end of it yesterday. WTF happened to that woman who was hitting herself? That episode was def in the Intervention top 10.
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CROCS are made in the devil's workshop. Yes, they are!
Yahoo answers should be rewarded with something,like an automatic spell check.
ISMU, call your mother!
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I'm your huckleberry...BITCH!!
ISMU...
Good luck with your mom...I am 500 miles away from my elderly mom (it's scary when they are in okay health). I hope and pray all is well (well, as well as can be expected) with your mother.
Submitted by ISprainedMyUvula on Tue, 03/24/2009 - 12:54pm.
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So sorry about your mother, ISMU.
Are you able to call her/someone close to her to check?
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"There's a kid on a Pogo stick in front if my house. It's nearly midnight so let's assume he's been drinking. This should end well for him."
- excerpt from Christopher Walken's Twitter
ISMU....I hope that everything's okay. Is there absolutely NO WAY to get in touch though...arrgghhh!!!
That's some sad sack shit poor Jen is going through. Luckily I don't know Jen, cause i'm tired of counseling my old friends who date young men.
My best friend just got screwed over by her 27 year old boy toy. She's 42 this year. Told her to stop fucking with little boys.
My other friend who is 39 told me she may be knocked up by her 26 year old boy toy who has a baby and still shanks his baby's momma. I told her too to stop messing with boys and their super strong sperm.
Some dumb bitches just don't learn their lessons.
Jen, find yourself a rich old man, leave the man boys alone. John is a fucking loser.
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Third test today, Mama Bear. Your eggo is preggo, no doubt about it. --- Rainn Wilson in Juno
Expecting my third in October.
First off, the designer who put a hood that big on anything needs to be eaten by wild dogs. Second, it makes her look like that prisoner in the infamous Abu Garib photo.
Happy Tuesday HOR!
ISMU-I am sure it was just a stalker and not anything for you to be worried about!
(I am not trying to make light or be disrespectful in ANY way)
Girls, I'm freaking the FUCK out and need some reassurance. I'm sure I'm overreacting, but I just noticed a missed call from a private number from after midnight last night and the only person who shows up like that on my caller ID is my mom's house. Some of you know that she's fighting cancer and that things aren't going well in her treatment. I'm flipping out and my worst fear of being so far away and having something happening and being the last to know is making it all worse.
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If you're so stupid that you can't see a hole that big, then by God you deserve to fall in it. -Morbidosity
Happy Tuesday Horz!!!!