Open Post: Hosted By The Grim Aniston
According to the paps, this is Jennifer Aniston wearing some kind of KKK/Orko from He-Man hood while leaving her hotel in NYC today to go shoot that movie about a bitch who makes love to a turkey baster or something.
I'm proud of my fingers, because I know they have the intense urge to type "This is the hottest she's ever looked!" Oops. They failed.
Who knows why Jenny decided to cause a mass amount of attention to herself by trying to look like she's hiding her chin from the cameras? Botox gone wrong? Her $60,000 hairstylist wasn't able to pass a blow dryer through her mop. Or it could be something simple like homegirl just has a herp sore on her mouth. Wait. You usually get those from mouth kissing another human being, right? Yeah, can't be that.
Speaking of herpes, when doing research for this non-story (I SWEAR), I found this question on the hilarious bible of all things hilarious: Yahoo Answers!
Can i get herpes from kissing a girl if she ONLY has it on her vagina?
ok me adn this girl were going out for about a week or so and we started kissing like a regular couple does and then i heard she has herpies i thought it was a rumor but i asked her and she said yeah she thinks, only on her vagina not on the mouth or cold sore and im worried cause im allergic to the metal on ur pants button and now my stomach itches is that the allergicness or acn herps spread even if not touched please help
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Submitted by snowpiece on Tue, 03/24/2009 - 2:15pm.
I NEED ONE OF THOSE.
@ Salem
Can you call the cops on them? Disturbing the Peace? Domestic violence? And if someone called the BOH on them last year, there is still a record on them and they could possibly be fined if there is an open record on them.
Good Lord how many people pick up road kill? People coming out of the woodwork with roadkill stories. I learn something new everyday. I never knew there was such a temptation.
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Submitted by Zappy on Tue, 03/24/2009 - 2:16pm.
One of the other nieghbors did that...last year. I'm not sure what else to do. Blast Metallica at 3 in the morning? Maybe then they'll get the picture.
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What's happened to the American dream?
It came true. You're lookin' at it.
ToxicSparkles, my 80-something year old neighbor is a total redneck. He collects roadkill deer (if fresh) and butchers them. He does have to report them to the game warden.
And he once took a three-legged rabid racoon home and put it in his freezer. My ex hubby had shot it out of a tree in our backyard, we were worried it would bite the children.
i know, thank God!
reply • report abuse
Submitted by Falkor on Tue, 03/24/2009 - 1:50pm.
Submitted by Mawy on Tue, 03/24/2009 - 1:43pm.
Ah, the uninformed youth. THIS is why we need sex ed (and not that abstinence only BS). This is why we need to reform the education system, period.
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Im so danm glad Obamas in office, hes reforming LAWS..partisan laws that Bush saw fit to put in place on morning after pills and sexual education. Now maybe the children can have a chance at not being completely screwed when it comes to sex!
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Use goodsearch instead of google. Each time you search, you can donate money to your favorite charity without having to spend any money yourself! Spread the word.
Salem: call the Board of Health on them. They will never know.
Submitted by toxicsparkles on Tue, 03/24/2009 - 2:14pm.
You got that off Yahoo answers? There are some real gems.
My grandparents used to eat roadkill. They lived and florida and would make Turtle soup or Rattlesnake, etc. They may have fed some to me every now and then, too and I turned out fine.
*cough*
ME did you hear about those cell phones with breathlizers inside to prevent drunk dialing? LOL I used to be baaaad with that.
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"This is MK. He started it" angel_i
"I think you will know what I mean when I say this, is that Adam Lambert makes me feel like a young girl who has just discovered gay boys, and wants more" TWOP
I have to go to the UK next month and my damn Verizon won't work over there.
So maybe Falkor's BF has a Verizon too?
(not to defend him)
Ew the other day my daughter got a PM from some 48 year old "looking for some young pussy"
She reported him.
I am hoping she will meet someone where she works, but she's at a logistics company and all the guys are way older.
I am so glad I am not single anymore. I’m 22, and whenever I would go out I would get fat guys, or old guys hitting on me. Not to sound shallow (but it’s going to anyway): what makes some fat, gross old guy think he could actually get with me? Guys are so overly confident and us women can be so overly insecure.
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Submitted by Jill-The-Ripper on Tue, 03/24/2009 - 1:50pm.
Submitted by Falkor on Tue, 03/24/2009 - 1:45pm.
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My daughter is 21, is broken up with her BF of 6 years, doesn't want to go to a bar to meet guys, etc. so she joined an online site.
Even tho she lists her "dream man" as being 20-25 she is inunndated with PMs from icky creepy older guys, some even into their 50s. Some toofless. Some with mullets. Some all of the above.
It's like they don't care that they are nasty, they have all the confidence in the world that a cute 21 year old girl would want to date them.
PS
She hasn't dated anybody.
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Use goodsearch instead of google. Each time you search, you can donate money to your favorite charity without having to spend any money yourself! Spread the word.
I hate my fucking piece of shit neighbors. They blast this horrific middle eastern chant/music EVERY MORNING. That bitch yells all the time so I can hear everything they are saying. In the middle of the night a couple months ago they were arguing and I could here her crying. I can even hear when she hits her kid. And the kids, those fuckin turds running and sliding down our own lawn. Even after I've told them to get the fuck off my God damn lawn. If thats not bad enough they've managed to bring mice with them. Last night a huge rat ran across my kitchen. We didn't have any til they moved in. Their backyard? It's a fuckin mess, trash everywhere tree limbs out of control, and the front lawn has dirty diapers, and weeks old newspapers.
/Rant
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What's happened to the American dream?
It came true. You're lookin' at it.
At least the hood hides her chin.
KD I am with you mah sister except when it comes to mowing tha lawn. that's HIS damn job, LOL.
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"This is MK. He started it" angel_i
"I think you will know what I mean when I say this, is that Adam Lambert makes me feel like a young girl who has just discovered gay boys, and wants more" TWOP
Is it ok to eat road kill?
Would it be ok to eat and occassional road kill? Sometimes when I drive around the highways and sidestreets near my house, I've seen some pretty nice looking road kill, which include but are not limited to the following: Deer, rabbits, squirrels, dogs, cats, raccoons, possums. Ive even went so far as to stop and check some of them out, and the meat does look tasty. I have a full garage at home where I could take them to clean, as well as a full assortment of chemicals I could detoxify the animal with. Honestly, I think it would be alot cheaper than buying the overpriced garbage Meijer products, considering you have to listen to their advertisements in the check out lines. My wife even thinks its a pretty good idea, that way we can consider ourselves as "living off the land". Any ideas would be appreciated.
3 minutes ago - 4 days left to answer.
M.E., TV is going to pop over to L.A. for a day or so when he is Vegas, since it is such a cheap flight.
snowy.....SHHHHHHHH! I don't do anything in Karate either- I just hold the bags for people to kick/punch.
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"One thing that we pride ourselves on is [that] we're not spoiled brats."
– Kim Kardashian
EEG - LMAO! I need to hide my cell phone and laptop from myself when I drink. I get all chatty cathy and want to talk with people.
ISMU,
Find a local pizza delivery, put a pie on your credit card and have it delivered. If she's there and fine, free 'za. If she's there and needs help, instant help! Good luck!!!
Falkor,
Is your man stationed in Germany by any chance?
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My boyfriend is always complaining that the reason he doesn't do anything around the house is because he works hard at work and is tired. It kind of bugs me because I tell him to buck and put on his big girl pants because it ain't gonna get any easier! If we end up having kids, he's going to have to do other things. I think maybe I have spoiled him too much as it is. I pretty much do everything because I like mowing the lawn and fixing things, so all he does is clean once in a while and when he does he usually gets in some cranky ass mood about how dirty it is when HELLO, I'm not the only one who is making messes.
Ok, I'm done ranting.
Momus the Sarcastic on Tue, 03/24/2009 - 2:02pm.
Submitted by Silvara0428 on Tue, 03/24/2009 - 1:59pm.
OOPS
I'm not really in the "now" right now.
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"RIP Tim, I'll miss you more than you could have ever known."
M.E. knowing TV my guess is he would want to meet you more.
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Mrs. K. squeezed my ass. I can die happy.
Nodding head @ PSL
I am what I am too PSL (except for the short stint in the dating website). It doesn't pay to lie ..tell stories? embellish..that's fun and hopefully people get the joke..but to pretend I'm something I'm not..nah.
People lie online? What!
Heeheeeheee.
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PSL - I am trying to get my boss to send me to this training seminar in Vegas in May.
It will be the the same weekend TV will be there. We've discussed maybe meeting, if I go.
But after my drunken diarrhea mouth this weekend. He may never want to meet me in real life. Ever.
Blabbering DRUNK!
ha ha PSL and don't forget you're a jellis h8ter mom jeans wearing basement living mental patient with that fear of going outside the house. walking your dog MAH ASS! ;)
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"This is MK. He started it" angel_i
"I think you will know what I mean when I say this, is that Adam Lambert makes me feel like a young girl who has just discovered gay boys, and wants more" TWOP
Submitted by Momus the Sarcastic on Tue, 03/24/2009 - 2:00pm.
Submitted by Falkor on Tue, 03/24/2009 - 1:53pm.
Where overseas?
His phone should work in most cities; the deep jungle is another story.
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Hes in Europe in a civilized, developed city.....he probably got another phone with a European area code but it seems like it would be really expensive to call him and its not like I have to hear his voice that bad..IM is working just fine.
Thats sick about your daughter and the dating site though. I could imagine guys on that site hitting on every single girl on that site..no matter the age or picture...and just waiting for one of em bite! Alot o men are disgusting, foul, egomaniac pieces of shit!
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smack. smack. sugar smack. give me a smack and ill smack ya back!
Speaking of 400 lb troll, I'm hungry and way too lazy to get up and put my Weight Watchers Lasagna in the nukrowave.
haha Zappy. :)
nah, I've met 4 Dlisters, I am who I say I am.
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"One thing that we pride ourselves on is [that] we're not spoiled brats."
– Kim Kardashian
Wallet raping cops!!!
LOL @ parissl
Submitted by Momus the Sarcastic on Tue, 03/24/2009 - 1:45pm.
What do working parents do on early-release days or in-session days?
In-session days, in California, are continuing education conferences for teachers and the school is closed.
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I am lucky that my family lives within miles of me. My MIL helps out on those days. Sometimes I have to take a 1/2 day or the BH takes a 1/2 day. But my family really steps up.
Submitted by Falkor on Tue, 03/24/2009 - 1:53pm.
My guy went over seas and he told me he had to get his cell turned off so I was just wondering if he was lying and you could actually have them work overseas or not...
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Yes, they work overseas, but I would turn mine off too. Probably costs like $3 a minute to talk. Best thing to do is pick up some cheap international calling cards before a trip.
people lie online all the time.....the real reason I did not meet everyone in Vegas is b/c I have been posting pics of some other lady, and I didn;t want anyone to see I really am 400 lbs. and a troll.
heehee
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"One thing that we pride ourselves on is [that] we're not spoiled brats."
– Kim Kardashian
Submitted by Silvara0428 on Tue, 03/24/2009 - 1:59pm.
"Call the wallet raping cops." Came from M.E. not me.
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"Oderint dum metuant." Gaius Julius Caesar Augustus Germanicus (aka Caligula)
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Submitted by Momus the Sarcastic on Tue, 03/24/2009 - 1:51pm.
This revelation may take me out of the parenting dicussion: I have no children. However, I am always curious as to how working parents cope. It is important to my line of work.
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It is hard! Not only is it very time consuming having to drive 2 different places before I get to work in the morning, it's expensive and I spend every day feeling guilty that I only see my kids from 6:30am-7:15am then 5pm - 7:30pm in the evening M-Th, Fridays I only see them in the morning I have all of Saturday with them and then either 1/2 the early part of Sunday or the latter part of Sunday with them depending on my shift. I never have time for ME, because I am always doing for my kids.
Even at work I end up having to do something in regards to the kids. Doc appt, checking on meds, calling school/daycare for misc. info.
It is very, very hard.
LOL @ Mom
When I first started chatting online it never occurred to me that people would lie..naiive to the max :S But I was lucky in the room I chatted in because everyone was on the up and up (the regulars).
Submitted by Falkor on Tue, 03/24/2009 - 1:53pm.
Where overseas?
His phone should work in most cities; the deep jungle is another story.
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"Oderint dum metuant." Gaius Julius Caesar Augustus Germanicus (aka Caligula)
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Momus the Sarcastic on Tue, 03/24/2009 - 1:39pm.
"Call the wallet raping cops."
(A little late on the draw)
Thank you!
Between fukn Space Camp, day camp, night camp, and get rid of your kid camp I'm going to be out 500 this summer unless I let him stay with his "MAW"
*dun dun dun*
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"RIP Tim, I'll miss you more than you could have ever known."
Submitted by Zappy on Tue, 03/24/2009 - 1:57pm.
I'm shocked! ;)
People would lie to match.com and eharmony!
*snicker, snicker*
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"Oderint dum metuant." Gaius Julius Caesar Augustus Germanicus (aka Caligula)
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Falkor,
The phone would work.
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Mrs. K. squeezed my ass. I can die happy.
@ Jill
It is possible to meet someone nice online. It happens, I have seen it quite a few times. Just that she has to walk through alot of weeds for sure.
Going back, I had put up a fake profile in a free dating website (for the hell of it)and got about fifty hits daily. Men are visual ..so visual that they can't read between the lines if they are lonely and seeking sex, companionship etc. So many had this overinflated idea that they were ..hot :S. WTF. Long story short, about 1% knew that the pic was not me and I had made a few nice online friends in the process.
Moral: Online dating can be done successfully, but in most cases, what you don't see is what you will regret.
OH thank god I thought he was going to quote my yahoo question. I had no idea that everyone could read it when I did it. Let's say the question involves a peculiar event surrounding the act of pinching a loaf. Something was hella wrong there. Well I'm still alive so that's good but I got all sorts of wacky replies and I wish I had never posted that question.
Submitted by snowpiece on Tue, 03/24/2009 - 1:39pm.
I just saw on the elevator tv that a lot of schools are gonna start having 4 day weeks to save $. What happens if the parents are at work? I don't get what they are supposed to do? Pay for childcare?
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That or put their kids in Private School. Which I am seriously considering. It is not that much more money and before and after school care is included.
Anyone from Mexico, or who watches spanish speaking TV know anything about a lady named Yadhira Carrillo? I saw her in a show once and thought she was really pretty.
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Submitted by Jill-The-Ripper on Tue, 03/24/2009 - 1:34pm.
Falkor, he's Canadian, two time zones away.
PS
I miss the weenie avie!
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HA! ill see if I cant find a better pic somewhere!
My guy went over seas and he told me he had to get his cell turned off so I was just wondering if he was lying and you could actually have them work overseas or not...
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
smack. smack. sugar smack. give me a smack and ill smack ya back!
This revelation may take me out of the parenting dicussion: I have no children. However, I am always curious as to how working parents cope. It is important to my line of work.
************************************************
"Oderint dum metuant." Gaius Julius Caesar Augustus Germanicus (aka Caligula)
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Submitted by Falkor on Tue, 03/24/2009 - 1:45pm.
~~~~~~~~~~
My daughter is 21, is broken up with her BF of 6 years, doesn't want to go to a bar to meet guys, etc. so she joined an online site.
Even tho she lists her "dream man" as being 20-25 she is inunndated with PMs from icky creepy older guys, some even into their 50s. Some toofless. Some with mullets. Some all of the above.
It's like they don't care that they are nasty, they have all the confidence in the world that a cute 21 year old girl would want to date them.
PS
She hasn't dated anybody.
Submitted by Mawy on Tue, 03/24/2009 - 1:43pm.
Ah, the uninformed youth. THIS is why we need sex ed (and not that abstinence only BS). This is why we need to reform the education system, period.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Im so danm glad Obamas in office, hes reforming LAWS..partisan laws that Bush saw fit to put in place on morning after pills and sexual education. Now maybe the children can have a chance at not being completely screwed when it comes to sex!
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
smack. smack. sugar smack. give me a smack and ill smack ya back!
@ Momus
All I know is that we did it too. Can't imagine doing it now, not with the high cost of childcare and preschools etc.
After I had kids, I worked part time and the boss let me leave to get my kiddles when the need arose. Sometimes my daughter would even come to work with me for a few hours. She would type at the typewriter when I was on the computer lol.
You'll get through it, even though sometimes you feel frazzled and pulled in different directions.
Stan,
Maybe an ego boost? Had a buddy last summer who was quite a bit younger. It was good as long as he didn't talk.
Soon got very bored. Current man is older.
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Mrs. K. squeezed my ass. I can die happy.