The Photoshop Awards: HoHan's "Sevin Nyne" Promo Pictures
What in the White Oprah dipped in diarrhea hell is this?! What is it? They tell me it's something called a Lindsay Lohan, but damn! They tried to Photoshop the cokeface off of her, but ended up turning her into a totally different species. And this crap is supposed to make you want to buy something she's selling! Hells no.
These two airbrushed to methland and back pictures are for HoHan's new line of caca in a spray bottle called Sevin Nyne. The number is important to her because it's probably the amount of times she ODed last year. Or maybe the number of genitals she licked on this month. Whatever. It means something.
When asked by People why she put out her own line of spray tan, she said, “As much as I love the sun, it is so bad for your skin. I have tried every product on the market and never found something that I loved. It was important to me to have a natural product that didn’t have a lot of dyes and chemicals. Our product has goji berry extract which has antioxidant properties, it has a natural golden color, it doesn’t streak and smells delicious — not like a typical tanning product.”
Translation: Bitch needs cash money. 8 balls and Red Bull don't come CHEAP!
Those of you who want to look like a Port-A-Potty full of orange doody exploded all over you can buy HoHan's crap at Sephora for $35 a bottle.
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I think in that picture the shade of her "tan" looks really good. But I also think that they had to have gone overboard in the airbrush department to get her skin to look so even, and I seriously doubt the color of her product comes out looking anything like that.
Not like I would even know what a natural tan looks like anymore. I haven't had one in about ten years.
And, Mike, I really appreciate the contribution of the insecticide comment.
Those who devised the name had never heard of Sevin®, one of the most popular broad-spectrum insecticides?
Submitted by PoodleLover on Tue, 03/10/2009 - 7:33pm.
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*sigh* I much I as a respect Miss Chanel's innovative style and ability to carry a brand well past her own lifetime, I can't help but wish she didn't start that tan trend. I wonder what she would say if she saw the ridiculous extent it caused.
Yeah, I'll be saying "nyne" to this product if that's what I'll end up looking like.
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Fer sure maybe, fer sure not, fer sure eh, fer sure bomb...
Submitted by Keane on Sun, 12/14/2008 - 3:41pm.
If only his mind was as quick as his reflexes, the world would be a much safer place.
"It was important to me to have a natural product that didn’t have a lot of dyes and chemicals."
As opposed to drugs, which are all natural.
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Chicago area 5K race 2009: http://rallyforautism.com/
And her whole number 7 love is starting to bug me. She spells nine with Y because Y is a 7. Wonder if she figured this out on her own while high and thought it was coooool.
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bytch, pleez
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People need not to fuck with me right now!--jussayin
You know who started this 'tan is chic' stuff, don't you - Coco Chanel. She made it trendy and cool to be tan back in the 20s. Before that, it wasn't a sign of stylishness.
Who's face is that? Port o Potty is right MK. I also call them honey buckets. The perfect name for her shade of tan.
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Antioxidant can be used as an adjective?
Submitted by mike on Tue, 03/10/2009 - 7:16pm.
There's nothing wrong with pale skin, ladies. A spray-on tan never looks natural, and a natural tan is horrible for your skin.
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*Stands up and claps*
Bravo Mike. You said it.
They even gave her a decent top lip...freaky...I find that super skinny girls can usually contort their bodies & legs into intersting positions.
Submitted by devilgirl on Tue, 03/10/2009 - 7:27pm.
Submitted by Sugaroo on Tue, 03/10/2009 - 7:25pm.
She should have put tar and nicotine in her spray tan line, that would be more natural to her!
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Tar heroin.
Good eeeeeeeeeeeeeevening, DG!
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The pair of moobs that makes a cameo at the 0:45 second was an interesting surprise - MK
Submitted by Sugaroo on Tue, 03/10/2009 - 7:25pm.
She should have put tar and nicotine in her spray tan line, that would be more natural to her!
Bitch please! No one in their right mind wants to rub that Oompa Loompa-shaded crap on their skin.
Eat a cheeseburger please
Like Acai, Goji berry's antioxidant properties only work if ingested, you fucking dumbass. Of course, BloHan is so desperate, she'd probably put this spray shit on her ciggies and expect not to get that drawstring purse-looking mouf.
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The pair of moobs that makes a cameo at the 0:45 second was an interesting surprise - MK
That bottom photo looks like a crime scene photo from someone jumping out of a building. Look at her twisted leg and foot. Weird!
This twat is so dumb, I bet she doesn't even know what an antioxidant is.
And I bet she sure has tried every damn tanning product on the market... the orangier, the better.
Edit: is "orangier" even a word? ho hum.
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-"I am not about to deal with unstable people" - HEART ANGELINA.
Nothing says natural like having skin that looks baked enamel.
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Pick up your socks and drop your slots, we're going to a party.
you can tell she's flexible as hell
http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0006718/
is
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1125351/
There's nothing wrong with pale skin, ladies. A spray-on tan never looks natural, and a natural tan is horrible for your skin.
Her legs look so weird in that last pose
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visit my art gallery :)
http://www.galleryhh.blogspot.com
Riiiight. The only chemicals she knows about are the ones that go up her nose.
Oh she ain't so bad.....I mean if they crucify her just
cause she has an emo poguey girlfriend...
well it ain't right....kind of like pillorying
Frances Farmer back in the day
http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0006718/
is
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1125351/
I see they let her spell the product name too.
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Hey man, Gandhi's anti-violence, not anti-comedy.
oh Lindsay. What are we gonna do with you?
sigh
These crab cakes are good as a mug. I fucks wit these crab cakes. - Ann Coulter
It sells in the Dollar Store next to Chestica Simpson's cosmetics line.
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"Oderint dum metuant." Gaius Julius Caesar Augustus Germanicus (aka Caligula)
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FAME clock @ 14 minutes and 59 seconds Miss Lohan..
and take that greasy family and that crackhead wanna be DJ living off her dads name with you ...
I would LOVE to see the BEFORE pics on this piece of Michaelangelo level painting of a picture
"You ARE a whore,darlin"- Cristal Conners, Showgirls
Shoulda named it SIXTY NINE.
HAHAHA! So what's this new drama where Sam stole her car and took off on her?
Sorry, Blo, but even your spray-on cooties won't mask your coke pupils!
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The pair of moobs that makes a cameo at the 0:45 second was an interesting surprise - MK
Shoulda named it SIXTY NINE.
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The last guy that told me to have patience, I burned him down and bagged his ashes.
All of the photoshop, lighting and makeup in this world are not going to give her high cheekbones, intense eyes and beautiful bone structure.
SHE JUST DOESN'T HAVE IT.
Always be that shanty little Long Island kid.
The End.
I guess I should get this since you sluts all bitch about white girls actually being white.
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'K, MAH PUSSY IS HANGING OUT!
http://www.myspace.com/luscious_t_999
looks like she's sportin' black bush
Give up, Linds. You are not going to bring back "Junkie Chic". The tired, wasted eyes, the coke teeth, and the unhealthy weight are so Kate Moss in '94.
"JUST SMILE LIKE A NORMAL FUCKED UP PERSON."
Charles Manson
She is, after all, all about natural products.