These Two Twats Got Married Today
Gisele Bundchen and Tom Brady became dick bag and wife in Los Angeles today. They married in a Catholic ceremony! My abuelita would clutch her rosary and pass out at this news! She didn't think any celebwhores should get married by the Catholic church, because they get divorced after their first hour of marriage. Dark-sided! If she knew the ho shit I did around a Catholic church, she would probably try exorcise the devil out of me. The devil ain't going nowhere. Bitch owns prime real estate in my body.
Anyway, back to those two pieces of boiled broccoli. Gis and Tom started dating in 2006. They reportedly got engaged on Christmas eve, but Gis denied it. Well, Gis is a major lie-teller now.
UsWeekly says that 28-year-old Gis wore an ivory Dolce & Gabba--- Oh, who gives a horse's floppy dick what that bitch wore! Tom should have worn a giant S over his forehead because he's a slutbag (and not in a hot way) for cheating on knocked up Bridget Moynahan with Gis. You know, I bet Gis has got a baby in there and that's why they got married. Gis better not get too attached to her new husband, because around her 6th month, homeboy is going to catch the next whore train out of there.
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Congrats. I think Gisele is Gorgeous. the angles on her face and the striking features set her apart. Her nose is Big. so What? 99.9999999999% of models are pasty barelythere features barbies. I know that's what considered Ideal beauty, but to me? Booooooring.
Tom is Hot, but not with that hairdo.
i hope she knows that how they come is how they go......
xoxox
The war isn't working.
He looks like a meathead version of Leonardo Dicaprio.
Whatever everyone hates about them, I can not deny that they are both beautiful people. Ive always thought she was gorgeous and I still do although I liked her better w/Leo.
And I still dont believe they're married till I see the certificate, these fuckers have been playing with us for a few months now.
I actually think she is terribly gorgeous & her body just boggles my mind...When I think of a perfect female body, I picture hers. I love her skinny lankiness, but she still has amazing breasts & a cute ass. I think he is actually a pretty decent looking guy & much better looking when he hides his forehead...He is a bit too intense looking in the eyes & its disappointing that you know there isnt much going on in there besides football plays, so I am sure he is a total & complete bore. She isnt very bright either, so they should be quite happy being unbelievably rich & beautiful in their blissful ignorance together.
True love or 14K gold plated trophy?
Submitted by delirious on Fri, 02/27/2009 - 1:34pm.
The reason why most brazilians are butterfaces: plastic surgery.
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Hey - what's going on in Brazil, anyway? I heard everyone's having twins out there.
♥ ThreadKilla!
OCTOMOMMY STRIKES AGAIN!!!
Finally! February Highlights #1!
FUCK YOU, WMG!!!
The reason why most brazilians are butterfaces: plastic surgery.
40% of women in Brazil (less than 40 years old) have butt implants... so imagine what else they do to themselves! Not much different either for the rest of the countries down there... There is this Carnival Queen who changes "ethnicity" and looks through plastic surgery every year to fit into the theme of her parade. No kidding! I saw it on tv in Brazil when I was there! Crazy! Totally crazy!
The Catholic church is pretty strict about pre-cana classes, so they have either been planning this for awhile or they paid the church off or she is knocked up & they said they needed a quickie wedding. I dont see Gisele getting knocked up so fast though, she is still kind of young & I am sure she thinks she still has millions more to make, plus he has a baby already, why throw another one in the mix so soon, unless its an accident of course.
Hmm. Met in 2006... He cheated on someone else to be with her....It's been 2-3 years now.... OH!!!!! I get it!! Now they are finally married they can break up after the publicity and the honeymoon.
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Love,
Mabel
How little we understand what touches off that tingle,
That sudden explosion when two tingles intermingle. --Mrs. Kravitz
Thank you, Campbells! You're telling the jokes for me. --MK
Yeah, the Patriots suck.
**rolls eyes**
He looks like caveman and she is a butterface. NEXT!
Who gives a shit. Patriots still suck.
that dress is HORRIBLE
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"I'd rather laugh with the sinners than die with the saints" Billy Joel
I just don't get it. In the words of Ms. Swan, she she looka like-a man.
Submitted by Mrs Patrick Campbell on Fri, 02/27/2009 - 11:48am.
Does Tom 'pack the fudge'?
Wears spandex for a living: check
Enjoys bending over for some hot, sweaty man-on-man action on the field: check
Partakes in dogpiling with a dozen other sweaty men in tights: check
American football is pretty comically gay when you think about it.
-Fuck you with something hard and sandpapery-
Does anyone else ever get the urge, when you see chin dimples, to stick your finger in it and try to push the person over? I want to do that to tommy.
Does Tom 'pack the fudge'?
BTW, Tom seems to have 'tinymeat face'.
Discuss!
I think that Giselle is pretty. She looks a little like my mom. Gis' nose does look kind of parrot-y at certain angles, though. I never noticed that before.
Blah, who cares? They're both overrated twats. He looks like he would fucking cry if he so much as broke a nail. And she's hot, but only from the neck down.
The Patriots suck, too.
-Fuck you with something hard and sandpapery-
i never thought gis was pretty...her face is fug. her legs are the breadwinners. the guy she married looks douchey.
Holy flashback, I totally thought that was DiCaprio for a quick minute, but then I remembered that they are ancient history.
If any of you have been to Brazil you will see that Gisele is the bottom of the barrel. BUNDCHEN is German name. All I see is a German woman just like Heidi Klum. Her family fled Germany to Brazil like um so many other um..Germans.
Where ever I go people swear I am Brazilian and I don't look like Gisele.
Tom Brady looks more femme than Gisele.
Submitted by soul on Fri, 02/27/2009 - 10:52am.
He's just an ordinary fornicator, then.
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Too Shy
I hate those pictures though. The slicked back thing is not his best look. I like when he's scruffy.
No Shelley, that is not her wedding dress. This is a pic from a few months ago.
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Sit down, take a look at yourself
Don't you want to be somebody?
Someday somebody's gonna see inside
You have to face up, you can't run and hide....
-Little River Band "Lonesome Loser"
"Submitted by Sheeps on Fri, 02/27/2009 - 10:29am."
oh...k.. never married??? *blush*
then congrats and I give them 6m, or less :)
><)))))*>
Submitted by You Knew Who on Fri, 02/27/2009 - 1:54am.
Have you ever heard of FOOTBALL? The New England Patriots? Tom Brady is famous for good reason. What rock have you been living under?
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Sit down, take a look at yourself
Don't you want to be somebody?
Someday somebody's gonna see inside
You have to face up, you can't run and hide....
-Little River Band "Lonesome Loser"
Bridget and Tom weren't married. And its never been made clear if either of them knew she was pregnant before they broke up. And because neither of them have spoken about it, we still don't know. Its just been assumed that Tom found out and then left.
Hate them both. They should've had Brangie as their attendants -- same moral fiber.
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"So? I'm intellectual and stuff."
"You're flunking English. That's your mother tongue, and stuff."
She looks like a sway backed mule!
Whoa, don't be hating on my Tom. Gisele is a man with a great body. Love Tom. And his son was there, supposedly with Bridget. So eat me.
Submitted by soul on Fri, 02/27/2009 - 10:01am.
not LEGAL, unless he got an anullment from the first WIFE. :)
IF they are Catholic, not then null and void.
Was Tom married before?
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Too Shy
he looks like Leo in this pic
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"This is MK. He started it" angel_i
"why is there a dead Pakistani on my couch"!?!
Best part of this story?
"Her three dogs also wore matching Dolce & Gabbana floral lace collars."
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Meh, congrats.
I'm torn about Giselle's looks...like the Seinfeld episode, she's pretty one minute then ugly the next, depending on the light.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
A loaf of bread, a container of milk, and a stick of butter.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5jdP7HUPbVs
Aw poor Bridg. For that whole saga alone I can't stand the douche. Gis seems alright though.
not LEGAL, unless he got an anullment from the first WIFE. :)
IF they are Catholic, not then null and void.
><)))))*>
Good morning whores and gents!
what the hail!
These two look alike. Creepay. Fug. Herman Monster Brady with his big ass head and this bitch and her fugly mug. What! I never said she didn't have a hot body!!! sometimes that ain't enough.
Aw who gives a shit!
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Zach de la Rocha-One day as a Lion-Wild International
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f5g0cv6NvRU
Happiness is warm gun
I honestly dont think this girl is hot...sometimes I think people just go along with what one person says and eventually everyone just thinks they should think Gissele is pretty
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I need some sunny weather!!!!!
Blah. Not exciting. Who cares. He'll leave her ass eventually.
Clarice! Your right. Elmyria Gultch, with the glamour to match. I give it 18 months, tops.
"If Drinks Aren't Involved, Then Neither Am I."
I have issues with this, not because I care about either of these tools but because they got married in a catholic church i'm sure if things don't work out they'll find a way to get out of it celeb style a la Tommy Matola.
Since I do not have money or fame I chose to get married in a court house in the caribean It's probably not even legal which is the best part ;)
y tu mama tambien!
Submitted by Notoriousrem_22 on Fri, 02/27/2009 - 8:43am.
Gis in da house!! Welcome, girl. You nose ain't THAT bad...
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You don't want whores sniffing at your goods.--MK
Holly crap! Is that her wedding gown? I don't know of ANY Catholic church around my area that would even consider letter her wear that dress in church!
@ Wino
Submitted by Zappy on Fri, 02/27/2009 - 8:17am.
He looks like Leolardo in that pic
I'm glad I'm drinking coffee while reading this story. They put the bore in boring.
Gisele looks like a tranny, and Tom looks like he could put an insomniac to sleep.
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ILLEGITIMI NON CARBORUNDUM
Anyone else thinks he looks a bit like Leo? Is she not quite over it?
hands down, Gis is THE most over-rated 'super' model ever.
that's a tranny in need of a major nose job!
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The line between sex and society is so fine and blurred... even Amy Winehouse wouldn't snort it.
http://www.myspace.com/triston