Tragedy: Lee Redmond's Nails Broken In Car Crash!
Lee Redmond, the bitch who can scratch your asshole from across the room, has lost her record-breaking nails in a car crash on Tuesday in Salt Lake City, Utah. No, Lee was not driving. Bitch can't even wipe her own pussy, let alone operate a steering wheel!
Lee was thrown from the passenger seat and taken to the hospital where she was treated for serious injuries. Lee lived, but her nails did not.
According to Guinness Book of World Records, Lee hasn't cut those things since 1979. In 2008, her nails measured a total of 28 feet long. Her longest nail, on her thumb, measured 2 feet, 11 inches.
You know this bitch was screaming for her nails after the crush. She wasn't even thinking about her internal organs. This shit gives me the sads, for real. And just like that, Freddy Krueger lost his favorite jack-off material.
Seriously, your lifelong work gone like that! But at least bitch can finger bang herself now without worrying about puncturing a lung or some shit.
Maybe she can get back into Guinness by challenging Vivica A. Fox to a "hairline-off." Unless Lee's hairline jumped back into place during the car crash. That would be sad upon sad.
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YIKES! I thought she was holding hula hoops when I first looked at the picture!
Maybe now she can do something with that hair. Long nails and long, gray hair on country bitches is ugly as shit!
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I just you tubed?? her and she was on Ellen, and answers all your questions, and demonstates about how she does certain things, as well as wipes, Hilarious! Same outfit she's wearing on Ellen. This woman will be traumatized by the loss so have some respect, now she'll just be ordinary like the rest of us.
"It must have hard on your mother, not having any children"
Wow,my god, looks like an old sorceress , can she do any housework?
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God she must stink!
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Bye! Good
That bitch got nothing else to do if she didn't clip her nails for 20+ years. Get a hobby fugly ho!!!
I don't know if it's because I'm a huge bitch but I'd walk by her with scissors and just nonchalantly clip that shit off. I think her tears would be worth it.
How did she get her shirt on?
ouch, what a FREAK! :)
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You cannot wipe your butt properly will nails that long. You can't do anything. I think this was God's way of telling this ho to get a hobby.
"I'll swallow your soul!!!!"
"Before you judge a man, walk a mile in his shoes. After that who cares? He's a mile away and you've got his shoes."
I bet you her fingernails smelled like ass.
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In the English vocabulary, the term "gorgeous" has been modified to replace "passably pretty".
Thank God those things broke off! Now I won't have nightmares thinking about those crusty things.
Oh good god, I hope it was painful for her, cause this is the most disgusting thing I've ever seen, I would never ever touch anything this dirty bitch has cooked....God knows whats under those filthy nails...She's the grossest bitch ever. She's running for a tie with the bitch with the longest toenails ever.
Both need to be clipped while they are given Rophenol.
Who's this woman again? Without the nails, she's just another old lady trying too hard to look young again.
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In the English vocabulary, the term "gorgeous" has been modified to replace "passably pretty".
That shit is just fucking NASTY!
I want to see her fucked up fingers. Post the pics!
蜘龍====================龍蜘
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(='.'=)
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I'm guessing the producers of shopaholic are doing their part. Isla looks hot, at least in the thigh-highs...
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Submitted by Sayonara on Fri, 02/13/2009 - 12:45pm.
Somebody needs to pay MK so he has time to post all these things for us to snark on.
That clip from ellen was cute. Nails more or less answered all our questions. Still, I'd want her to take a shower before I did any close-up work... Just to be sure. ;)
Thank god those long dirty ass fingernails broke. How did she wipe her ass?! I bet she was so infamous she had hired help to do that for her. Sick ASS bitch! She looks EVIL!
"The master's tools will never dismantle the master's house." Audre Lorde
Submitted by Sayonara on Fri, 02/13/2009 - 12:45pm.
Somebody needs to pay MK so he has time to post all these things for us to snark on.
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You can only hold it so long before crunchy gets soggy. - TITS
Submitted by WTFOMGLOL on Fri, 02/13/2009 - 1:13pm.
Amen sustah! I'm going to be 50 in a few months and I earned every damn day of it! I can say that because I'm lucky. 10 months with no cycle and very few other symptoms, and I still enjoy sexay times. And my stylist is a whiz with hair color.
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You can only hold it so long before crunchy gets soggy. - TITS
that's so fucking gross! just all dead skin cells or whatever. nasty!
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"And I went through this whole thing; am I gay?! Am I straight?! And I realized: I'm just slutty." ~Margaret Cho
"This is supposed to be about delicious booze!" ~MK
now that those funky nails are gone, i bet lee smells alot better...
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i broke my cunt...lisa lampanelli
Another person out of work. Her Ass-Wiper is now out of a job, this recession is no joke.
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Amy Sedaris's next role?
I am so effing happy this happend.
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the nails are nasty. i bet they had all sorts of parasites and stinkbugs in them.
get well soon!
Ich blech gick >gag<
ewlulu - you just made me throw up a little in my mouth!
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It's official - Michael K. is MAH BOO!
I guess that bitches nails prevented her from buckling the seat belt.
Paging Dude - Dude please report to the crazy nail lady thread....
Dude: DUDE! Barbado Slim was posting earlier!
I hadn't seen him in a while.
OK just wanted to share that.
gods way of telling her to quit being a useless retard
wonder what her toe nails look like!
That's one way to get out of all responsibility, including wiping yer own bung.
the DUDE! abides...
I bet she was knocked out when they did their 'manicure'.I smell a lawsuit.
xoxoxoxox
Between two evils, I always pick the one I never tried before.
That is just foul.
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"I bet watching them fuck is like watching a hot dog slowly explode in the microwave," MK
Somehow I don't think Lee Press-On Nails will be able to help this lady out.
Wait a minute, her name is also Lee, you don't think those things were press-ons?
that's the way ahah i like it! that's the way ....
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Because no one fastened it for her. Imagine not doing anything for yourself for 30 years!!!! How do you eat, dress, comb hair, shower, do sexy time... ahhhh
What the heck did she do all day?
Submitted by Rosemary Young on Fri, 02/13/2009 - 1:17pm.
Thrown from the passenger seat = No seat belt
Can't be said enough.
Submitted by Bunny Rabbit on Fri, 02/13/2009 - 1:39pm.
"The worst was when one of them would tap on a desk with those claws. The noise would grate my nerves, just like the beating heart from Poe's story."
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That is literary genius, Bunny Rabbit!
Somewhere in the afterlife, Mr. Poe is approving in a Gothic fashion.
I remember a quote (misquote) saying you could tell the decline of a society by how muck Fakery hair wise (think Marie Antoinette or Paris Hilton) they have going on, I'm pretty sure all the acrylic nails and shit should qualify as well.
Also, I agree with Bunny Rabbit; GROTESQUE !
'Meth' is a terrible addiction. What can I say?
'Lois' on 'Family Guy'
-"Submitted by ImpertinentVixen on Fri, 02/13/2009 - 1:29pm.
Crypt Keeper and her nasty fungal-infection-waiting-to-happen machete fingernails make me barf."
"Machete fingernails"!!!. Hahahahahaha!!!! LOLs to infinity and beyond.
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-"I am not about to deal with unstable people" - HEART ANGELINA.
In her long life, THIS is what this broad aspired to?? Guinness Book-worthy nails?
Nice to have goals, innit?
I'm with 'Im a Princess' - how do you do ANYTHING with those nails? Who dressed her? Not that they did a good job - mind you. That shirt looks like something my 15 year old cousin owns.
Dress your age peeps - you can still look attractive doing so........
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It's official - Michael K. is MAH BOO!
Long nails always gross me out. I am a strictly short and groomed nails girl. My cousins all used to have long nails, not as long as this obviously, but long enough to be declasse. They were so ghetto, but what do you expect out of West Covina and Paramount's finest (you LA sluts know what I mean)? Their nails would constantly break, so they had this mishmash of sizes on their hands. One nail long, one nail short. I'd tell them if your nails broke, just cut them all off for the love of God, and start over. But no, they'd insist on keeping them all different sizes. The worst was when one of them would tap on a desk with those claws. The noise would grate my nerves, just like the beating heart from Poe's story. I was so ready to get homicidal. Watching them eat and seeing their nails full of food was another issue. Another gross thing they did was pierce their nails. But like I said, they were so ghetto, they didn't go to the nail salon, they did it themselves with a stick pin. Then they'd put a tiny gold earring in it and walk around as if their shit didn't stink. Needless to say, we are not on talking terms any more.
Crypt Keeper and her nasty fungal-infection-waiting-to-happen machete fingernails make me barf.
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Chicago area 5K race 2009: http://rallyforautism.com/
You know they say that your hair and fingernails continue to grow after you're dead and this bitch looks like someone just dug her ass up.