Suri Is Over This Shit
People all across the world make the exact same face every time they look at Tommy Girl and his weepy ass robobeard. Suri speaks for us all with her standard "bitch, please" face. Suri also threw in a hint of "fuckery" face and just a dash of "not today" face. Basically, homegirl is thisclose to taking the razor out of her and cutting a bitch. When that day comes, I know she'll be ready for her gorgeous chola makeover.
It was probably Suri's day off and she already had plans to deep condition her hair and twitter a bit. But then the thetans in Stepford Katie started to itch, so the bitch had to go outside and she dragged Suri with her. This is not Suri's idea of a good time. Especially since that dumb bitch Katie made her walk some of the time! Katie is lucky Suri didn't clt+alt+delete her ass.


Submitted by RocketQueen on Thu, 02/05/2009 - 5:27pm.
Oh Michael K - I finally had to register just to let you know that your commentary and photo descriptions are, BY fucking FAR, the funniest shit out there. Never change.
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I agree with RocketQueen. Your commentary is by far the funniest around. Comic genius.....you are a TRIP!!
Where do you come up with this stuff? Keep rockin' MK. Love your stuff!!!!
Oh Michael K - I finally had to register just to let you know that your commentary and photo descriptions are, BY fucking FAR, the funniest shit out there. Never change.
Listen, kiwikim, you ignorant moron, I was walking on that very beach about 3 weeks ago. It is clean and safe and absolutely gorgeous. The Bay of Rio de Janeiro is considered one of the 7 wonders of the world. I'm sure there's no such thing as hepatitis and aids and heroin where you are from, right? Think twice before you bash someone else's country and embarass yourself.
Here this was too good to pass up.
http://img23.imageshack.us/my.php?image=poster902300567158355ic9.jpg
Nice. She won't take off her own shoes and possibly expose the bottom of her feet to the heroin needles and hepatitis aids condoms on the beach in Rio, but for Suri, it's OK.
Nice Junior Sea Org outfit!
Dayum, Katie's legs are tree trunks.
Suri seems to get a lot sweet treats when they are out...She is seen frequently eating a cupcake or a cookie & here its ice cream...I bet that is how they keep her quiet & behaved...Sweets & toys.
OK, the tranformation is complete. Now, can someone please explain why in the name of Scientology did Katie have to become Victoria Principle?
And how did a girl with such awful tree trunk legs survive the casting couch?
The look on both their faces is "I fucking hate this. I fucking hate Tom."
The roundest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference. He acquired his size from too much pi.
all suri needs is a little brother and she'll be fine
No wonder that baby's mad...she's walking!
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"We do not gnaw on our kitties"
Dr. Evil
I used to wonder who Suri's bio-father is, but kid is looking more and more like Joshua Jackson, with whom Katie had a reunion one-night-stand after her break-up with Chris Klein. Also, is Suri supposed to be nearly 2y or nearly 3y?
>>lets not blame the gossip sites. they just bring us the news, they dont create it.>>
On the contrary, and this bit of "news" we are commenting on right now is a case in point. A celeb getting busted for something is news. A celeb going nuts publicly is also news. But a celeb on vacation with his/her kids is not news, it's the invasion of that family's privacy, and the media has no right to be there and take pictures. As far as I'm concerned that is harrassment, and there should be a law that prevents it.
I agree with a poster who said that at least the kids should be left alone. They are not the celebs, and they deserve the privacy their parents unfortunately don't enjoy.
Submitted by jiggywiddit on Wed, 02/04/2009 - 8:43am.
I wouldn't mind a piece of AC either. Though I'm pretty sure I'm not his type.
He could play with my chi-chis I guess. All gay men love the chi-chis right?
Right?
I don't understand how Katie is so malnourished looking from the waist up and so tree-trunky from the waist down.
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Fuck these bitches. I got my own problems. - The Fly
Matchy-matchy outfits!
Puke.
Submitted by Keane on Wed, 02/04/2009 - 8:28am.
They want to be her and fuck him and vice versa, takes them out of their humdrum lives.
......
Well, I want to be MK and fuck Anderson Cooper, so it's all good.
Carrying on with my humdrum life now.
xo
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I am nuclear energy.--Kanye
I am totally for people getting the meds they need. --Hekki
In other news, Ian Halperin has been reporting that CZJ and Michael Douglas are quitsville. They've both consulted top flight lawyers in preparation for a big custody battle over the kids. Though apparently she has been having second throughts and wants to try to work things out. Remember that blind item a way back about a grown-up kid catching one of his parent and step-parent combo at it with someone else who we all assumed was Rumer and Ashton/Demi. Turns out it was the older Douglas kid, (Cameron is it?), presumably catching daddy at it with somebody else and then lying for him to keep the relationship with CZJ together. What a sad, fucked up world they live in huh? I'm disappointed though as Ian was teasing us for weeks with clues about who it was and it could equally have applied to Brange. CZJ and MD, not sure I really care about whether they're together or not.
As for JJ'ers I honestly think their love for Brange is pretty shallow/basic. They like her because she is hot and they like him because he is hot. Its not much more complicated than that. They think she's cool and edgy and doesn't give a fuck what anyone thinks about her when we all know nothing could be further from the truth. They genuinely refuse to believe that they set up pap shots, manipulate the press etc, coming up with the most detailed defences/explanations of why AJ is pictured at toy shops dressed to the nines and waving and smiling at the crowd like her life depended on it etc. It's hilarious.
The main point about these people is that they are pretty young, immature and shallow. They have no concept of how the world really works, are easily impressed by people who they think are "cool" and think that being hot is more important than having morals. They'll probably develop some depth when they grow up. Until then its just fantasy projection isn't it? They want to be her and fuck him and vice versa, takes them out of their humdrum lives. I'm sure we've all done it at some point in our lives, just with less vindictiveness to anyone who disagrees with us perhaps!
Suri is bright red in my grey world
Between two evils, I always pick the one I never tried before.
Submitted by Statler and Waldorf on Wed, 02/04/2009 - 3:10am.
This is OT, but why are the people at JJ such douches?
I've often wondered. The best explanation I've seen is they were all the creep goth types at American high schools- the kind we see on the news after they have shot everyone. Ange getting Brad was like the goth girl pissed on the homecoming queen and now they wank themselves to death over her triumph. Once social services takes those unkempt kids away they will calm down. Short version- outcast beats golden girl, outcast now queen of all outcasts who lust after golden boy and envy golden girl.
To stay on topic- I don't feel sorry for Katiebot anymore. Sell your life, OK but an innocent kid? I fear it might be too late to save Surly tho'- I hear Omen music whenever I see her *shudder*
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I have had a perfectly wonderful evening, but this wasn’t it. (Groucho Marx)
Suri's face is priceless...
"Bitch, please!"
and someone please tell me what Twitter is?!
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The line between sex and society is so fine and blurred... even Amy Winehouse wouldn't snort it.
http://www.myspace.com/triston
Submitted by MickeyHolland on Wed, 02/04/2009 - 5:53am.
I think that being in the spotlight all the time is seriously messing this kid up. I like my daily shot of celebrity gossip, but not at the expense of some little girl. All major gossip sites should make a pact to leave the kiddies alone from now on. There are enough troubled young people in Lalaland as it is.
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when you parents are scienofreaks the least of your concerns is being in the public eye.(unless your dad is micheal jackson of course.) if her parents really wanted to keep her out of the public eye they would. (whens the last time you saw a pic of johnny depps kids?)lets not blame the gossip sites. they just bring us the news, they dont create it.
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Colt 45 and 2 zigzags, baby that's all we need.
I think that being in the spotlight all the time is seriously messing this kid up. I like my daily shot of celebrity gossip, but not at the expense of some little girl. All major gossip sites should make a pact to leave the kiddies alone from now on. There are enough troubled young people in Lalaland as it is.
That's a golden chance for Katie!! Why doesn't she ask for asylum in Brazil?! Really, I think Katie was walking around looking for means to escape Tommy's crazy ass.
Also, why do I always get the impression that Katie is very uncomfortable when she is in public? It almost looks like she doesn't like anyone staring at her robotic face (but we know she loves it really)
She looks like she wants a pay rise.
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"I meant what I said!"
"What, do you want me to write a haiku; spell it, or do some interpretive dance?"
This is OT, but why are the people at JJ such douches? He posted yet another interview with Angelina going on about her kids and people are drooling over there about her beauty, charm, devotion to family, blah, blah, blah.
It's sickening. Thank God for the brutal honesty of D-Listers.
Just had to get that off my chest. Good night!
I think Suri is tired of walking and wants to be carried. But I think KateBot was tired of that fuckery too I take it. Suri looks like she's gained a little weight in the face to me.
"The master's tools will never dismantle the master's house." Audre Lorde
My cat just puked in the living roon. Suri looks done.
Sad. They are to crowded. I bet they feel very alone and sad.
I bet tom and Kate feel like freaks.
Katie doesnt look like a Robot. She is starting to take on that Princess Diana....melancholy surrender....
That who she reminds me of. Just the delicate sadness of it all.
Melancholy Surrender. No control in her life.
Her child is sad and irritated and the thousands of encounters and ....I feel sore about all three of them.
Katie lost her luster. Bloom is off the rose.\\
I bet she feels guilt and regret for bringing a child into the madness they call life.
SURI WAS OVER THIS SHIT A LONG TIME AGO (sorry about the caps but I wanted to be emphatic).
"MOM I WANT CHICKEN NUGGETS"
"NO, anyways its not REAL chicken"
"Hmph, either is your marriage"
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"They lie about marijuana. Tell you pot-smoking makes you unmotivated. Lie! When you're high, you can do everything you normally do, just as well. You just realize that it's not worth the fucking effort"
I just realized I basically have Kate Holmes' haircut without even meaning to. Damn. Well, I can say that I wear it a helluva lot better.
counting down the time before someone makes this an avie...
Katie has no shame. For Christ's sake, that's her daughter! There's no hope for Tommy, he is just not a normal, sane, rational person. I totally don't expect anything less from him. But I did expect Katie to at least retain some of that, "Momma Bear protecting her cub", instinct. As it turns out, she is even lower than him. All this for some clothes and cash? Despicable.
i´ll bet suri is like "you and i are done professionally, bitch"
--AND YOU´RE WALKING LIKE DADADADADADA... WHAT DON´T YOU FUCKIN´ UNDERSTAND?- my Bale--
Submitted by angel_i on Wed, 02/04/2009 - 12:00am.
tsk tsk. even worse! caffiene AND all that sugar. ooooh i'm such a preachy patty.
you now what would make it all better? al-co-hol.
do you guys have 24hr bottle delivery yet?
.o.o.o.o.0.0.0.O.O.O.0.0.0.o.o.o.o.
It's got the body of a spider, and the mind of a baby.
Submitted by TITS on Tue, 02/03/2009 - 11:55pm.
Submitted by angel_i on Tue, 02/03/2009 - 11:43pm.
I sense you've jumped (jumped being the key word) back onto the coffee wagon?
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No coffee. Chocolate;p
♥ ThreadKilla!
Well, you know - I heard it through the Grapevine:)
That's not what this is. Every time a decent person comes in you set out to prove they have brain damage. House MD
Submitted by DeeDee on Tue, 02/03/2009 - 11:56pm.
Submitted by Team Valtrex on Tue, 02/03/2009 - 11:53pm.
Hahahahahaha! Well they sounded fantastic to a chick with a "few" gin and tonics in her. But I don't think they'll be gettin' a record deal anytime soon.
You should use your boobie pic as your avi. I love that pic.
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I think you're right, on all counts.
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"Get some wrinkles on yo fo'head, bitch!! - Slutty
ok, Suri's face is hilarious in that pic! I think she's saying, "Mom, you KNOW you shouldn't be wearing mini dresses with those legs of yours. You need to flatter your body!"
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I can't take pity on men of this kind, even though he now takes it in the behind
-Sublime "Date Rape"
James Haven just got off the phone with Sir Tommy! Sir Tommy was in tears at what has been going on in the media about him and his beloved Kate!
He wanted James Haven to spread the word that they are happy and more in love then they ever were!
James Haven could hardly contain himself while Sir Tommy boo hooed.
Sir Tommy forgot James Haven caught him trying on Posh's Jimmy Choo's at his annual Christmas party. James Haven was looking for the latrine when he walked in and found Sir Tommy and Posh together! Posh was sitting on the bed crying because Becks told her she looked fat, and there was Sir Tommy prancing in pumps asking if they made his legs look long!
It wouldn't have been so bad if Sir Tommy was wearing pants but he wasn't! Nasty!
Becks tells Posh she looks fat whenever there are hot women in the room cause he knows she will run off and leave him alone to bust a move.
Sir Tommy said all this negative talk about him and Katie is bringing him down. He says that is the reason his movie Valkryie bombed. Is that the reason? James Haven thought it was because Sir Tommy can't act!!
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See James Haven in an Oscar winning performance!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2w9cKFiCrSU
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Submitted by Team Valtrex on Tue, 02/03/2009 - 11:53pm.
Hahahahahaha! Well they sounded fantastic to a chick with a "few" gin and tonics in her. But I don't think they'll be gettin' a record deal anytime soon.
You should use your boobie pic as your avi. I love that pic.
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I'm about to commit some crime on a bitch! ~Molotov Cocktease
Submitted by angel_i on Tue, 02/03/2009 - 11:43pm.
I sense you've jumped (jumped being the key word) back onto the coffee wagon?
.o.o.o.o.0.0.0.O.O.O.0.0.0.o.o.o.o.
It's got the body of a spider, and the mind of a baby.
Submitted by DeeDee on Tue, 02/03/2009 - 11:49pm.
The art wasn't bad, but that band couldn't play weddings in the NY/NJ area.
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"Get some wrinkles on yo fo'head, bitch!! - Slutty
Submitted by Team Valtrex on Tue, 02/03/2009 - 11:43pm.
Dragged? I was barely led astray! Dragged infers reluctance on my part.
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True. But I hope the art exhibit didn't bore you to death. I owe you a couple of vodka drinks for that! Plus you had to sit through the band at the Tropicana.
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I'm about to commit some crime on a bitch! ~Molotov Cocktease
Aw man! And now Mani is just aSTOMPING all over my dreeeeeeeeeeeam! DAAAAAAAMN!
♥ ThreadKilla!
Well, you know - I heard it through the Grapevine:)
That's not what this is. Every time a decent person comes in you set out to prove they have brain damage. House MD
Submitted by mike on Tue, 02/03/2009 - 11:43pm.
Submitted by TITS on Tue, 02/03/2009 - 11:40pm.
Yeah, mostly guys insofar as the tourists were concerned. If I had to classify, I'd say turkey, mostly.
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Turkey!?! I thought you said it was in Las Vegas?! I mean, Vegas - I can dream...but Turkey?! Ugh!
♥ ThreadKilla!
Well, you know - I heard it through the Grapevine:)
That's not what this is. Every time a decent person comes in you set out to prove they have brain damage. House MD
Submitted by angel_i on Tue, 02/03/2009 - 11:35pm.
BBQ's for the Suri-bot?
Her life may never be "normal" unless she runs away to a remote island and marries some guy named Edwardo has 8 kids and claims that her parents died in a skiing accident.
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@TITS: Dude, I feel EXACTLY like Suri looks.
♥ ThreadKilla!
Well, you know - I heard it through the Grapevine:)
That's not what this is. Every time a decent person comes in you set out to prove they have brain damage. House MD
Submitted by DeeDee on Tue, 02/03/2009 - 11:40pm.
Dragged? I was barely led astray! Dragged infers reluctance on my part.
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"Get some wrinkles on yo fo'head, bitch!! - Slutty