Wednesday, January 28th 2009
Faye Dunaway Speaks The Truth
There's a vicious, vicious, vicious remake of Bonnie & Clyde currently in the works starring Hilary Duff and Kevin Zegers. If Satan was a chipmunk-fucking movie producer, he would be behind this slaughter party. Shit like this makes me want campaign for a drug free America, because whoever came up with this brilliant idea was definitely shooting up some of the bad, bad shit.
Faye Dunaway is in my box, because the Chicago Sun-Times says that when she was told about it, she said, ''Couldn't they at least cast a real actress?''
Hilary Duff's jumbo Chiclets were knocked out of her teeth after hearing those 8 beautiful words from Master Faye. That must have felt like a wire hanger up the ass. Hook first. The truth always destroys.
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Submitted by Uncle Ashtray on Wed, 01/28/2009 - 10:33pm.
Yum.......Aqua Velva
~
Aqua Velva and booze breath. Thanks for the child toucher memory.
I owe you a wire hanger.
Tiger, are you on myspace?
.o.o.o.o.0.0.0.O.O.O.0.0.0.o.o.o.o.
Tupperware is not an eating vessel.
Submitted by Tigerlilly on Wed, 01/28/2009 - 10:43pm.
Velvet hammer is SOFTENING the blows, but not really...
*
I know he can't help being ugly, but he could have stayed home.
or
Your coat is looking very shiny today Tigerlily, you can't even see the shit stains on your hind withers anymore.
.o.o.o.o.0.0.0.O.O.O.0.0.0.o.o.o.o.
Tupperware is not an eating vessel.
Submitted by Charles Manson on Wed, 01/28/2009 - 10:29pm.
DONT TELL FUCKING ME THE GODDAMN VELVET HAMMER IS ANYTHING LIKE THAT FUCKED UP SHIT THE VELVETEEN RABBIT. THAT DUMBASS PIECE OF SHIT IS WHAT FUCKED ME UP.
*
sadly too long for a signature line.
Rabbits fucked you up eh? Take comfort in knowing that Tigerlily uses bunnies to wipe her ass and their bones to pick her teeth.
.o.o.o.o.0.0.0.O.O.O.0.0.0.o.o.o.o.
Tupperware is not an eating vessel.
Velvet hammer is SOFTENING the blows, but not really...It's like saying, "I'm not saying you're done in this town, I'm just saying, have your bags packed just in case, honey..." That's the velvet hammer...
Or, "I never said you were ugly, I said I could never possibly fathom the appeal of your particular kind of beauty..."
VELVET HAMMER...
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Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...
Submitted by SICKITTEN on Wed, 01/28/2009 - 10:37pm.
Chharles Manson, I have cancelled my highlighting appt. due to you
HOW DID I DO FUCKING THAT. REFRESH MY MEMORY. IM GLAD FUCKING REGARDLESS BECAUSE I FUCKING PREFER BRUNETTES.
Charles manson, she is a cult figure on Dlisted, my site, and my life! Screw Obama, the new hope is with Charles Manson of DListed
This is sacrilege!The worst casting ever!
Between two evils, I always pick the one I never tried before.
Chharles Manson, I have cancelled my highlighting appt. due to you.
Cancelled the nails done due to Hekki.
Know what? You guys are right, no matter what commenters say. I'm standing with you guys, and saves me money in this economy.
http://sickitten.com/
scroll down to see yourselves.
Submitted by Charles Manson on Wed, 01/28/2009 - 10:29pm.
DONT TELL FUCKING ME THE GODDAMN VELVET HAMMER IS ANYTHING LIKE THAT FUCKED UP SHIT THE VELVETEEN RABBIT. THAT DUMBASS PIECE OF SHIT IS WHAT FUCKED ME UP.
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I haven't figured out what it is either.
To me, a 'Velvet Hammer' is what I call it when I mix Gin with my Aqua Velvet after shave.
Yum.......Aqua Velva.
================================================
"...Soon we'll be away from here. Step on the gas and wipe that tear away...."
The thing about this movie is, Bonnie signifies a femme fatale. Hilary Duff achieving this is a fail, mainly because she looks like she cries while on the can after a night at Taco Bell.
Angelina would be better even though I dislike the bitch, mainly because she looks like she'd cut you. Her "acting" in this would be better than Duff even if she made them re-write it so Bonnie steals the cash, flees to Africa and gives it to the children.
Fuck casting directors and producers!!!
DONT TELL FUCKING ME THE GODDAMN VELVET HAMMER IS ANYTHING LIKE THAT FUCKED UP SHIT THE VELVETEEN RABBIT. THAT DUMBASS PIECE OF SHIT IS WHAT FUCKED ME UP.
Oh, my god! I'm a Joanaloonie!!!! Ack! Meh, oh well, at least she was probably a better parent than Brangie...I keed, I keed...not really...
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Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...
kevin zegers was adorable in that dreadful "jane austen's book club" movie, but i'm convinced his eyebrows want to meet...
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we've all had our fair share of cock...it's nothing to shout about...
Submitted by Miss Thang on Wed, 01/28/2009 - 10:13pm.
I'm sorry, but you need only listen to The Joan Crawford Christmas Special to see what kind of controlling emotionally manipulative mother Joan was to those kids. Who makes their kids give away their Xmas prezzies? That's fucked up. There's gotta be a better way to instill generosity in ur kids. And her taking Christina's role in that soap opera when she was sick without even letting the poor girl know? WTF? WHo does that?
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Ok, first of all, all of Joan's FANS would send those litttle brats xmas presents GALORE...in addition to what SHE bought them. She thought it was just too much, so she said IN ADDITION to the ones that she gave them, they could pick two or three and the rest would be given to charity. THAT'S what really happened. Those little fuckers wanted for nothing. And so what if she gave more than that away? Those lil' brats had more than most of us would ever DREAM OF...Oh, the horrors of having to give our GAZILLION xmas presents away when we get to keep SOME of them, meanwhile there are kids STARVING TO DEATH in this world, but let's feel sorry for FUCKING CHRISTINA CRAWFORD and her lack of xmas prezzies????? FUCK HER!
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Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...
waitttttt ... Lizzie McGuire doesn't count?
duff doing faye doing bonnie...i don't like it...
_____________________________________________
we've all had our fair share of cock...it's nothing to shout about...
Submitted by Tigerlilly on Wed, 01/28/2009 - 10:09pm.
LOL! Best way to handle people like that. OK, have to admit, there is one stupid shit who really makes me want to smack the crap out of her.
We used to hang out and then I found out some bad crap about her that was over the top. I stopped all communication with her and she started acting like a complete fucker.
So when I see her (plus vocally challenged friend) the first reaction from her is to laugh, really loud at me in front of everyone.
I'm so tempted to just go over and just start saying all the shit about her loudly to everyone present... UGH *clenches fist*
What good is an old Hollywood that welcomes "mystery" when nowadays Achy Breaky's daughter is parading her adult hanger-on boyfriend around shamelessly, even at *church*?
Somehow I can't picture Anne Blyth or Shirley Temple being so blatantly trashy.
Submitted by venetian_courtesan on Wed, 01/28/2009 - 10:07pm.
Submitted by johnnysgirl on Wed, 01/28/2009 - 10:03pm.
LMAO, that video is funny, but slightly disturbing...
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Oh, do watch her other videos! She's your Aunt Barbara, the Tupperware consultant from Long Island. And a little while back, she was Hot Slut o' the Day!
BTW - she really does sell tupperware :)
I'm sorry, but you need only listen to The Joan Crawford Christmas Special to see what kind of controlling emotionally manipulative mother Joan was to those kids. Who makes their kids give away their Xmas prezzies? That's fucked up. There's gotta be a better way to instill generosity in ur kids. And her taking Christina's role in that soap opera when she was sick without even letting the poor girl know? WTF? WHo does that?
I am just too much. - Joan Crawford
Submitted by Tigerlilly on Wed, 01/28/2009 - 10:09pm.
---
What does velvet hammer mean?
........
Fer sure maybe, fer sure not, fer sure eh, fer sure bomb...
Submitted by Keane on Sun, 12/14/2008 - 3:41pm.
If only his mind was as quick as his reflexes, the world would be a much safer place.
Submitted by Tigerlilly on Wed, 01/28/2009 - 9:10pm.
Submitted by johnnysgirl on Wed, 01/28/2009 - 8:58pm.
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Nope. The book was published in '78. Joan died in '77. Christina knew she was dying too. Joan did find out about a book before her death and that's presumably why Christina was disinherited. The twins who were her heirs dispute Christina's allegations as well...
Read Mommie Dearest AGAIN, then read the discrepancies in the 25th anniversary editiion. Eye-opening.
That lil' whore was put in a convent because she lied about her age and FUCKED a guy before her 12th b'day. She admits it.
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Heart-breaking: I read that when Joan found out that Christina was writing the book, she said "No good deed goes unpunished." So sad.
I'm so lucky - my mum is the best :)
Submitted by luckycharms on Wed, 01/28/2009 - 9:55pm.
Submitted by venetian_courtesan on Wed, 01/28/2009 - 9:44pm.
Submitted by Tigerlilly on Wed, 01/28/2009 - 9:38pm.
Totally agree. I find by looking at them, stupid, weak shit that women do behind each others backs is so crappy.
If you gonna stab a bitch, be brave enough to face her.
Women can be brutal. One of the most pivital moments in my life was when I met a total stranger out on the street. She was a sweet looking little old lady and could tell I was upset. She asked me what was wrong and I told her about some gals at the office who were ganging up on me. She just smiled and looked straight at me and serious as a heart attack said: JUST HIT THEM WITH THE VELVET HAMMER. Best advice ever.
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HAHAHAHAHAHA! It's soooooooooooo true! I usta know this dumb whore who would say shit to me and about me all day long, and I would just bite my tongue... {rise above it...be the bigger person...)
Until one day I had enough. She said something (in front of other people, of course, her favorite tactic), and I finally said, "Wow, that was quite a zinger. Do you feel better about yourself now? Because clearly, we all know that's what this type of thing is about...And I don't think I need to go into details to support my argument, now do I?"
This bitch WALKS ON EGGSHELLS around me now. I called her out in front of EVERYBODY. It wasn't necessarily a velvet hammer, but considering what I COULD HAVE SAID, that fuckin' shit was velvet wrapped in 3 ply cashmere...HATE FUCKING WHORES LIKE THAT!
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Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...
Here's what I think of this remake:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U3F3GiUUHxE
Submitted by johnnysgirl on Wed, 01/28/2009 - 10:03pm.
LMAO, that video is funny, but slightly disturbing...
Submitted by Home on Wed, 01/28/2009 - 9:55pm.
Whatever your childhood was, it's clear that you have your head on straight and a good perspective on it. Thanks for sharing your story.
And I agree that movie "Christina", while no beauty, was much prettier than actual Christina.
"JUST SMILE LIKE A NORMAL FUCKED UP PERSON."
Charles Manson
@venetian_courtesan
>Definitely. I think it's because they didn't parade their shit through the streets of L.A.
Sure, there were rumours and gossip, but it was their work that defined them, not who they slept with. It leaves a mystery to them and not so self-indulgent with fame, but more with craft.<
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Hear hear!
And here's our Aunt Barbara to back us up:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=spUJF0uk_F4&feature=PlayList&p=FD6A847D8F...
"In my day, Doris Day didn't show her what's-gone-sour, she covered it up! If she gained 5 pounds, she put on a bigger dress!"
Submitted by Home on Wed, 01/28/2009 - 9:55pm.
I loved your rant.
I laughed. I cried. It became a part of me.
:-)
================================================
"...Soon we'll be away from here. Step on the gas and wipe that tear away...."
Submitted by luckycharms on Wed, 01/28/2009 - 9:55pm.
AHAHA! I rarely get shit from other gals, mainly because I keep to myself at university, but when confronted with cheap backtalk, I turn around and do the following in order: toe to head look + smirk
Simple, but I'm not a quickfire with remarks.It makes them feel so little.
Submitted by TOPANGA on Wed, 01/28/2009 - 9:52pm.
We were just watching the beautiful Ms. Dunaway in "Network" in my communications class yesterday.
*
High school?
.o.o.o.o.0.0.0.O.O.O.0.0.0.o.o.o.o.
Tupperware is not an eating vessel.
Submitted by Tigerlilly on Wed, 01/28/2009 - 9:38pm.
Don't forget Garbo(i vonts to be alone)!
which would've had today's bitches for breakfast...figuratively and literally.
Submitted by Tigerlilly on Wed, 01/28/2009 - 9:28pm.
I personally thought Christina was being a little bitch when she insisted on pouring Joan's date a scotch, like she does for "all her uncles", then barged into the bedroom with the refill. I'd beat her too! Also, she tried to take Vera's boyfriend away and did the "roll-in-the-hay" on the first date, (even though Vera busted them before they could complete the act).
Thanks, for the cheering, Tigerlilly! You are a sweetie. I think I got at least 40 of the 50 right. I have to wait 'til they email me with the pass or fail news.
BTW, one of the questions, I knew from good old Dlisted. It was something like, "This young troubled actress has been linked romantically with Samantha Ronson! No lie!
Good night and happy snarking!
"JUST SMILE LIKE A NORMAL FUCKED UP PERSON."
Charles Manson
This layout is not very flattering for Hilary Duff. Her nose looks even bigger next to Faye's.
Faye has gorgeous skin..even today.. i see her at my gym
xoxox
The war isn't working.
Faye is the Hotness. Why she ever did "Mommy Dearest" escapes me when she later said it was one of the biggest regrets of her career.
Christina was a very homely child and later grew up to be a less than average looking woman but I don't doubt that some of her memoirs included a lot of painful truths.
The odd part is though... I would have bought Christina's accounts of her childhood lock, stock and cock if she'd been more beautiful than her own mother. As a child of a narcissistic woman, when my beauty matched and then surpassed hers I was the "enemy". I loved my mother dearly too and it broke my heart when she favored my younger, homely, "jock", sister over me even though the rest of my family adored me. It was a strange familiar juxtaposition that haunted me for the rest of my adolescent and later young adult years.
As I looked back in history I realized my mother was jealous of me from my birth on because of the [undeserved] adulation I recieved for being the "First Born" grandchild and that coupled with my lousy father that never paid a single cent of child-support settled the deal in her twisted, selfish mind. -But, what a lousy excuse to harbor hate for your own child. I certainly didn't deserve any adoration for being 'first' any more than I deserved the hate for it.
Joan Crawford was a hot mess drunk in real life and her portrayal by Faye is so freakishly reminiscent of my own mother's whacked out rants and rages (only, hers were not with cold-cream but with those nasty green, clay masks of the 80's and when she'd blow a gasket screaming at my sister and I the visual was truly horrific when the mask was mid-drying and coming off in flakes while her eyeballs bulged and her neck veins bulged).
Joan adopted more kids...and they have nothing but glowing prose for her but, this happens a lot to first-borns...the later kids get better treatment than the "Tester first" who suffer a lot more brutality.
This rant was probably better placed on the off-topic thread but it is what it is.
Anyway. :)
Submitted by venetian_courtesan on Wed, 01/28/2009 - 9:44pm.
Submitted by Tigerlilly on Wed, 01/28/2009 - 9:38pm.
Totally agree. I find by looking at them, stupid, weak shit that women do behind each others backs is so crappy.
If you gonna stab a bitch, be brave enough to face her.
Women can be brutal. One of the most pivital moments in my life was when I met a total stranger out on the street. She was a sweet looking little old lady and could tell I was upset. She asked me what was wrong and I told her about some gals at the office who were ganging up on me. She just smiled and looked straight at me and serious as a heart attack said: JUST HIT THEM WITH THE VELVET HAMMER. Best advice ever.
I can't quit you babe, so I guess I got to put you down for a while--Led Zeppelin
NO MORE WIRE HANGERS EVER!
xoxox
The war isn't working.
Submitted by Miss Thang on Wed, 01/28/2009 - 9:43pm.
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Bette was a jelly h8r of some Marilyness whereas Joan got it on with her!!! Oh, yeah, they did some oyster divin', those two. How hwat it that? MM wasn't as into it as JC was but still, HWAT!
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Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...
We were just watching the beautiful Ms. Dunaway in "Network" in my communications class yesterday. Such a beauty...Hillary Duff def does not compare....side note: I'm watching the original Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory, I just realized the dark humor and almost horror like feel of that movie. Especially when they are traveling in that tunnel. Talk about an acid trip!
*****"Don't have sex, because you will get pregnant and die. Don't have sex in the missionary position, don't have sex standing up, just don't do it, OK, promise? OK, now everybody take some rubbers."*****
I fuckin love love love Faye..and she is so right... it is insulting to remake this classic and worst with trash... noone can replace Faye in her prime....noone.
xoxox
The war isn't working.
"Dramatic art in her opinion is knowing how to fill a sweater."
-Davis on Jane Mansfield
Submitted by Tigerlilly on Wed, 01/28/2009 - 9:38pm.
Totally agree. I find by looking at them, stupid, weak shit that women do behind each others backs is so crappy.
If you gonna stab a bitch, be brave enough to face her.
Submitted by madam s. on Wed, 01/28/2009 - 9:03pm.
I want to read more about the Joan Crawford/Bette Davis feud. That sounds fantastic. I'll have to do a little research at Amazon.
There's a lot of fun Bette and Joan interviews on YouTube. ALso, some of their movies like "Whatever Happened to Baby Jane," and "The Women" are posted because the movies r so old they r in the public domain.
Regarding the Bette v. Joan feud, I think most of it was Hollywood manufactured. Honestly, they were in two different studios, had two totally different acting styles and career paths (Joan was more of a movie star and Bette was considered a better actress). I think 90% of it was just that they were competitive cuz they each wanted to be the queen bee of the industry. I think the other 10% was that Bette was famously bitchy to any of her female costars.
A few days ago, I watched an interview on YouTube with Bette on Larry King talking about how she knew Marilyn Monroe was going to be a big star when she worked with her (one of MM's first big roles was in "All About Eve"). Then, she showed her true bitchy colors by adding that she thought it was remarkable how none of the male costars found Monroe the least bit attractive.
I am just too much. - Joan Crawford
Oh.......Good Christ. This has to be a joke, right?
Most remakes suck. Everyone knows this. How they make up for production costs in ticket sales is beyond me. THIS blasphemy, however, takes the whole fuckin' fancy frosted cake. Duff as Faye Dunaway as Bonnie Parker?
What the sort of insane fuckery is going on over there in Hollywood??? And Dunaway wasn't being a conceited bitch - she had a normal reaction.....like the rest of us.
Faye was perfection, and Warren. Hilary should watch some of Fayes movies. "The Thomas Crown Affair", "Chinatown", "Oklahoma Crude".
-\=__=/- a whole box of Kleenex???criminy, I know what you 2 are getting from Santadog!
Submitted by xerquina on Wed, 01/28/2009 - 9:29pm.
i always thought joan looked like a mannish chola.Bette was brutal and elegant, Hottest dead slut in my book.
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It's really shocking if you look at candid pictures of Joan Crawford with her kids. She looks very soft and incredibly beautiful, almost like a different person. It's really weird, but I think she was a chameleon type...
I find them both (Bette and Joan) true feminists of ANY generation, FUCK that stupid bitch Gloria Swineum up her lying hypocritical ass, Joan and Bette did it better, and did Grace Jones. These are the REAL feminists...
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Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...
Submitted by StewieGriffin: "What few real actresses we have (Kate Winslet, Cate Blanchett etc) wouldn't be caught dead remaking a classic like Bonnie & Clyde for some douchebag execs who only want the flick to appeal to the ADD crowd, that being anyone under 21."
A-fucking-men.
TITS's picture
Submitted by TITS on Wed, 01/28/2009 - 9:27pm.
“Just because a person’s dead doesn’t mean they’ve changed.” - Davis
So cold and harsh...
Submitted by luckycharms on Wed, 01/28/2009 - 9:25pm.
Definitely. I think it's because they didn't parade their shit through the streets of L.A.
Sure, there were rumours and gossip, but it was their work that defined them, not who they slept with. It leaves a mystery to them and not so self-indulgent with fame, but more with craft.