They Got Bart Simpson!
Most of us know that Nancy Cartwright, the voice of Bart Simpson, has been hypnotized by the alien evil lords. One year, she gave Scientology her entire year's salary: $10 million. But now she has gone too far. Nancy has dragged Bart into this fucking trainwreck! Or should I say spaceshipwreck?
Nancy is robo-calling for Scientology using the voice of Bart. Even my ears screamed "OH MY XENU."
Homer needs to come get his child and choke the L. Ron Hubbard out of him! And Matt and Fox need to come their lawyers so they can sue the fuck out of this crazy troll.
Poor Bart. I wonder what kind of shit Scientology has on him now?
That circle jerk with Milhouse and Martin was just meaningless experimenting, Bart. It won't ruin your career, because we won't hold it against you. Just step away from the aliens....
VIA Village Voice
• 
The video's been removed. Can someone give me the Cliff's Notes version?
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Did I dream this belief or did I believe this dream?
--Peter Gabriel
Submitted by Hysteria on Wed, 01/28/2009 - 12:50pm.
Submitted by vegaschick on Wed, 01/28/2009 - 12:41pm.
To all the D-List bloggers:
I have a fabu idea. Let's all get together and create some bullshit, fabricated religion.
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I agree....tax free status is easy.... We will dye our hair ginge and all shave our eyebrows off and draw them back in with a Sharpie we will be all chola'd up. We will wear hats in the shape of Spaghetti cat and stroll the streets for abandoned couches..*I heard that this is how the Co$ got it's start...and the rants of a drunken doped out writer*..Like our M.K.!!
....okay ALL RISE AND PLACE YOUR HAND OVER YOUR CRUSTED BLACKENED HEART AND TAKE THE PLEDGE!....WHAT THE FUCK IS IT??...Yea, that's the pledge
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CALL THE F.B.I.!! The Sciencreeptologists are are delusional and think we are after them !!!
Can she do this? Hello Fox?
xoxox
The war isn't working.
omg lawsuit! I'm disgusted by this! :-(
BANNING THE SIMPSONS FOR LIFE. How disgusting.
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There is no way to happiness. Happiness is the way.
--Buddha
And the Message never says the word Scientology once, so you might end up going to this event and get kidnapped. I finally did some research on Lron Hubbard and now I do think that scientolgists are a bit stupider/crazier/scarier than other religions. But the walking on water shit is still ridiculous.
the breaks my heart to say. truly. but the simpsons have jumped the shark. *cries hysterically*
o.k., this just pisses me off
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"We play the game,
with the bravery of being out of range."
I say take that telephone number, pass it along to all of our friends, relatives, co-workers, etc., and crank call the fuck out of them!
Goddamn crazy bastards
Wrong on so many levels.
SUE.
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The job is all yours, TITS.
I just had another idea too, we should go to COSTCO and get a one ton box of rubber bands and sell them as religious bracelets that ward off evil spirits and protect our precious celebrities from ill health, wrinkles, cellulite, and droopy boobs. You know like how those Kabbalah sheisters sell those pieces of red string? My vision is coming together!!!!!
i thought this sciento was not allowed to do the bart voice outside of the "simpsons"...i hope she and the scentos get sued for a huge amount of money...
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we've all had our fair share of cock...it's nothing to shout about...
Submitted by vegaschick on Wed, 01/28/2009 - 12:41pm.
I volunteer to do the bookkeeping.
.o.o.o.o.0.0.0.O.O.O.0.0.0.o.o.o.o.
Tupperware is not an eating vessel.
vegaschick, Stains would be an excellent spokeswhore!
@Green is Good:
Yes!!! Spaghetti Cat will be one of our deities, and I'm going to suggest we nominate Stains, the zombie-eyed cupcake loving dog as our leader!! Celebrities love dogs, we can sit them in front of Stains and have him hypnotize them with his zombie eyes while they write us blank checks! Maybe we can convert Tommy Girl and get him to donate his entire salary from his next box office flop! The money will be rolling in people, get on board now!!!
And great idea, missy, I'm lovin the key to the universe slushy drink! You can be in charge of marketing! I think we should use the Britney Spears grape drink formula, that will be a hot seller.
I read her book a few years back before I knew she was a Scientologist. It was a really boring read. The point is, she mentioned that while she's clear to do the Bart voice in public for fun, she's not allowed to use it to promote anything other than The Simpsons. I hope she gets a smackdown from Fox.
Oh, and while $10 million is an awful lot for voice work, that year she probably had been paid for the movie as well. And Hank Azaria is worth $20 mil a year when you get down to it.
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Did somebody say PCP? I LOOOVES THE PEACEY P!!
Ha! Like Bart would have anything to do with that shit. I wish Bart was real so he could take those fuckers down, properly!
♥ ThreadKilla!
Happy Birthday, DLISTED!!!
I take a couple uppers, I down a couple downers
But nothing compares to these blue and yellow Purple Pills!
ewwwwwww
Submitted by vegaschick on Wed, 01/28/2009 - 12:41pm.
To all the D-List bloggers:
I have a fabu idea. Let's all get together and create some bullshit, fabricated religion.
______________________________
haha. that's really it. i'm mainly pissed that they lobbied for and received "non profit" status. the fucks. big money can always cheat out of paying taxes. then they beg for a taxpayer bailout. tax money they would deny school kids. arrgggg!
rant over.
.
Submitted by vegaschick on Wed, 01/28/2009 - 12:41pm.
Im in. I'll make some drink out of dirty melted slush and sell it as the key to the universe.
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Fuck 'Em If They Can't Take A Joke
a message from the Church of the SubGenius
vegaschick, ha ha ha! I want to have Spaghetti Cat and Abandoned Couch as dieties in our religion.
Haaaaa, she is SO getting sued - she's not allowed to use Bart's voice outside of approved situations.
To all the D-List bloggers:
I have a fabu idea. Let's all get together and create some bullshit, fabricated religion. Lets say oh, mermaids and sea monkeys created the earth and we're all just waiting for the day when magical unicorns rain down from the skies and become our leaders. Then we go to Hollywood, pitch it to useless, dumb as fuck, narcissistic celebrities and wait until the dough starts rolling in. It's not fair, L Ron Hubbard shouldn't be the only one with this hustle.
There's one in my neighborhood, on E. 82nd Street. Sometimes I walk by and peek in really quickly. Although to really see anything, you have to go down a few steps, which I never do. I'm a'skeered! But I've never seen a soul in there.
I also spotted on on Third Avenue in East Harlem, from the car on our way to the Triborough Bridge. I only saw it once, and I keep trying to catch a glimpse of it, but they must have taken the sign down. Mr. Hekki thinks I was imagining it.
DAMN FUCKING ALIEN FUCKERS BETTER NOT MESS WITH MY SIMPSONS!!!!!!
The Simpsons are my gateway to all things America, thanks to them I was able to undestand this fucked up great nation.
Does anyone else remember the episode where the family joins a cult? A cult that loved the "Leader" and the leader had a spaceship in the barn? It was fake of course, but it was possibly a silent dig at CO$.
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http://hesterprinesworld.blogspot.com/
A place for book lovers and free thinkers.
Submitted by thlayly5 on Wed, 01/28/2009 - 12:14pm.
Um, no, CO$ doesn't have Lisa, as Lisa is voiced by Yeardley Smith, who isn't a scientologist.
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Well that fuck for that. I was about to go find Yeardley personally and slap a bitch!
(¯`'•.¸(¯`'•.¸♥¸.•'´¯)¸.•'´¯)
2007~It was a truly magical time in Shitneyland.
"jim is our Dollar Store version of commingback." -christine the hoff 12/04/2008
I'm sure Fox or whoever has the simpson trademark or whatever has something to say about this. I don't think she can just do whatever she wants with the Bart Simpson voice, even if it is her.
and even so, that is just stupid. Like the CO$ really wants Bart Simpson to be a role (roll) model?
As a Scientologist even i am offended by this! Cowabunghole!
Why does a "Church" need a Navy?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CtHi_mGCXaM&feature=related
Um, no, CO$ doesn't have Lisa, as Lisa is voiced by Yeardley Smith, who isn't a scientologist.
This is truly fucked up.
"To alcohol! The cause of and solution to all of life's problems!"-
creepy, DUDE!!!
Well, If you put a finer point on that pencil, CO$ has Lisa Simpson, Bart Simpson, Nelson Muntz, Todd Flanders, Kearney and Ralph Wiggum!!!
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Still fuckin snowing.
Yeardley Smith is a $cieno too???? NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!! CURTIS!!!!!
I loved that ho in Maximum Overdrive. Goddamn that idiotic cult and GD people for being stupid enough to join it!
(¯`'•.¸(¯`'•.¸♥¸.•'´¯)¸.•'´¯)
2007~It was a truly magical time in Shitneyland.
"jim is our Dollar Store version of commingback." -christine the hoff 12/04/2008
It's not just Bart-they got Lisa (too lazy to Google her real name) too!
Submitted by Green Is Good on Wed, 01/28/2009 - 12:00pm.
10 Million dollars? Well, it WAS her money. Now it's lining David Miscarriage's pockets.
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actually the money is used to promote their demi-god tommy girl and dress Surly in designer clothes...
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CALL THE F.B.I.!! The Sciencreeptologists are making false claims that people want to kill them so they are wasting taxpayer's money to cover their asses by asking for FBI protection!!!
CALL THE F.B.I.!! The Sciencreeptologists are holding Bart Simpson hostage have brainwashed what is left of his cartoon brain!!!
SUE THE BITCH!!!!!!!!
10 Million dollars? Well, it WAS her money. Now it's lining David Miscarriage's pockets.
Does the CO$ sell snake oil, too?
The Simpsons producers are notoriously litigious when it comes to use of their characters and the voices. I remember the producers had to give the voice actors specific permission to do the character voices on camera for that episode of Inside the Actor's Studio. And even then, the show still had to cut away often and couldn't show extended shots of the actors doing the voices. If I remember, the only one who got extensive screen time while doing the voices was Hank Azaria (who I think is so hot BTW), mainly because he doesn't voice a main character.
Nancy Cartwright is going to get in serious trouble for this. She should have known better.
She should at least have given half her salary to a faux religion founded by Comic Bookstore Guy.
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I am the devil, and I am here to do the devil's work.
not okay
Submitted by fulgora77 on Wed, 01/28/2009 - 11:49am.
Submitted by Morrissey on Wed, 01/28/2009 - 11:42am.
Actually I know a girl who can do Bart's voice DEAD ON. When we were in high school she even bought herself a Bart Simpson costume and made a fortune renting herself out for kids parties and shit. She would even sing "The Bartman" song as her closing act haha.
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really? omg, that's something. if you can still get in touch with her, and you're serious, I'm sure she COULD get hired after Nancy's contract is up.
But Groening et al has to know about her, first.
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"You can get it doggy-style or you can get it laying on your side. Those are your only choices. This is my house and I get the say."
Submitted by Tyranny on Wed, 01/28/2009 - 11:48am.
Submitted by fulgora77 on Wed, 01/28/2009 - 11:44am.
Umm, isn't she going to get sued? I thought she was only allowed to do the voice for the show?
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Doubtful because she'll just walk off the show if she feels fit to do so. She's loaded so it's not like she *needs* the Simpsons. They, however, need her.
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exactly my point. unfortunate, isn't it. ugh.
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"You can get it doggy-style or you can get it laying on your side. Those are your only choices. This is my house and I get the say."
Submitted by fulgora77 on Wed, 01/28/2009 - 11:49am.
Submitted by Morrissey on Wed, 01/28/2009 - 11:42am.
Actually I know a girl who can do Bart's voice DEAD ON. When we were in high school she even bought herself a Bart Simpson costume and made a fortune renting herself out for kids parties and shit. She would even sing "The Bartman" song as her closing act haha.
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Get that bitch's number to Matt, STAT. Even if it's slightly off we'll adjust quick enough.
If this isn't a case of "Someone needs to smack a bitch" then I've never seen one.
~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.
Surfing the apocalypse.
Submitted by Morrissey on Wed, 01/28/2009 - 11:42am.
Actually I know a girl who can do Bart's voice DEAD ON. When we were in high school she even bought herself a Bart Simpson costume and made a fortune renting herself out for kids parties and shit. She would even sing "The Bartman" song as her closing act haha.
Submitted by fulgora77 on Wed, 01/28/2009 - 11:44am.
Umm, isn't she going to get sued? I thought she was only allowed to do the voice for the show?
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Doubtful because she'll just walk off the show if she feels fit to do so. She's loaded so it's not like she *needs* the Simpsons. They, however, need her.
I'd say the cult freak should be fired for pulling this shit, but then there would several "Mysterious" deaths among The Simpsons writers, creators, etc.
can she use Bart to endorse another cartoon figure, XENU??? NOOOOOOOOOO WAY MAAAAAAN
-\=__=/- to Rocco and Bubba: don't eat the furniture,rug, or laundry baskets. you have chew toys!! And if you're on my computer and reading this, you better turn it off now! thank you