Page Six Magazine Won't Let Jeremy Piven Be Great!!!
Jeremy Piven is the Kanye West of cable TV, but less cappy and filled with many more gallons of douchewater. Jeremy did a photo shoot with Page Six Magazine back in September to promote the Broadway play he later quit because he had rotten fish in his system or some shit.
The Piv was such a mega asstard during the shoot that Page Six Magazine has an article in this week's issued called: "Is Jeremy Piven the biggest jerk in showbiz?” The answer is brought to you by the letters: Y-E-S.
They say that at the shoot, The Piv was asked to pose for just a normal headshot. He answered, “This isn’t my first time on the merry-go-round. You want mediocre? I can give you mediocre.” Yeah, Jeremy, I've seen a couple of episodes of Cupid.
After about an hour of The Piv not giving it his all, he ducked under the camera, let out a "gutteral moan," ripped the sleeves off an Armani shirt and gave us the picture above. The GREATNESS inside his soul was finally able to pour out. Too bad all the shit he's got in there didn't come pouring out too.
The gutteral moan probably came from the jumbo stick of Mercury that's shoved up his colon. And he totally looks like he's suffering from the hard shits in that picture. Push that stick out so the caca river can flow, Piv.
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I think they transplanted his body hair to his scalp..
I'm just sayin.
I prefer "Labia Lickin' Lady" over his obnoxious shouts of "Hot LEZZZZZBIAN Love!"
That fish was probably good until it got into his innards
ATTENTION! YOUR HELP IS URGENTLY NEEDED!!!! Please help me find out the identity of the "infamous female pop star" Ange Jo has been shagging? We have already discounted Madonna as they hate each other and Madge is about as attractive as a builder's arse and suggestions so far are Gwen Stefani as they had play dates right after Shiloh was born; Britney (who else is infamous?); Xtina Aguilera (she may be missing the vag now she's with batboy); and Pink (Ange like's the manly ones). Please help me decide who it is, I need to know this piece of gossip! Plus I think Ange is the answer to the blind item about being pregnant but other things getting in the way right now 1) tenuous relationship with her partner 2) her very aggressive lawyer trying to prevent some very damaging stories about her getting out i.e. her bodyguard's tell all book and the lesbian fling. Help me with the detective work!
I never said PCU was a bad movie, it's about my alma mater!!? Hahahhah!
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Ah, thats better. It made me sad for a minute - plus a friend works with all these damn kids and not one of them has seen it or heard of it. They also don't know who Queen is.
As for Piv, yea still love him. Ego and all
His behavior sounds a bit chemically induced.
'Meth' is a terrible addiction. What can I say?
'Lois' on 'Family Guy'
Submitted by Clarisse on Fri, 01/23/2009 - 3:20pm.
Man…The Larry Sanders Show, Grosse Pointe Blank, PCU, Old School, Ellen….Then like someone added douche juice to his coffee or sumfin.….
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The scary thing is, I have seen almost all of this stuff and I am totally not remembering anyone who looks like him. (I have never heard him speak, I have never seen Entourage...)
He must look like a completely different person now.
I don't care, I still like him.
The nerd in me has to come on here and write,
but mercury is liquid at room temperature...
Don't blame me. Not my fault.
Ari is great because that's how The Piv really is. He's not really acting so whatever...
I never said PCU was a bad movie, it's about my alma mater!!? Hahahhah!
STFU!!!
Submitted by Albatross on Fri, 01/23/2009 - 3:10pm.
Submitted by Provolone on Fri, 01/23/2009 - 3:08pm.
He was GREAT in One Crazy Summer
OMG, I forgot that he was in that movie!
His hairline was so funny then!! Doesnt he claim not to have plugs?? How does ones hairline grow with age
I clicked on that link and saw those taylor momsen pics...15, huh? "Im sorry judge i didn't know!"
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"They lie about marijuana. Tell you pot-smoking makes you unmotivated. Lie! When you're high, you can do everything you normally do, just as well. You just realize that it's not worth the fucking effort"
Yep heard that awhile back, that Piv was douchy to John after that. But I did love his speech when he got that award, I really thought it was good and that he was humble - wrong!
he give me the fucking creeps
Old School, thats an all time favorite of mine! Will Ferrel jumping through fire hoop is priceless!
One Crazy Summer - loved it. But the best movie - EVER....Better Off Dead
Look dude, it's Christmas Eve, I could be at home right now making this monster egg nog by brother makes with lighter fluid....
I just froze the left half of my brain...I can't move my right arm....
People die down there and dying when your not really sick, is really sick...
I LOVE John Cusak (except in the Grifters and that attempt at a western he did)- in movies, in real life, eh. Same with the Piv, loved him in Ellen. That's where I first remembered him from. I had a big crush on him then.
I'd feel much more sympathy for this guy if he were a cokehead or alcoholic. There's no rehab for GREATNESS like his.
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CROCS are made in the devil's workshop. Yes, they are!
Rumour has it that Cusack and Piven are no longer friends...apparently the split happened just after Jercury won the Emmy.
Team Cusack.
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Kiss my grits.
Man…The Larry Sanders Show, Grosse Pointe Blank, PCU, Old School, Ellen….Then like someone added douche juice to his coffee or sumfin.….
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Paris works peen like a coma patient
works a triathalon! ~ESE
A blind, crippled mule could whip Piv's ass.
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So what if some of the crayons are missing; use the ones still in the box. Maybe the world needs a purple horse.
If Mamet's press release made you wonder, "But is he the oral or the rectal kind?," I think this is making it clear.
Maybe the photographer was shit? I don't think that's hard to believe looking at that photo. Speaking of Piv, he is the only thing going for Entourage, the rest are douchebags.
PS. That whole Mercury poisoning may not be a lie. He is being sued for bailing out on the play, but the producers (or whoever is suing Piv) didn't move forward with getting him tested by a different doctor. If you believed someone was lying, wouldn't you want to prove it? I found that odd.
love him
and John Cusack too.
eh
parisherpes - PCU is a classic!! Blasphemer!! Plus Favreau and Alex Desert, I can't be the only one... Anyone?
I hear Cusack is the same way. Intolerable.
Jeremy and the guy who plays his assistant are the only good thing about Entourage. He is still a total dickwad tho.
The Piv was in that movie with Chris Young...PCU? You can see his hairline slowly recede. Wasn't he in that retarded First Daughter movie? Yeah, The Piv has certainly been in some stinkers...
STFU!!!
he is a tool.
Submitted by Provolone on Fri, 01/23/2009 - 3:08pm.
He was GREAT in One Crazy Summer
OMG, I forgot that he was in that movie!
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WHY WON'T YOU LET ME BE GREAT!!!
Damn, what an asshole.
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WHY WON'T YOU LET ME BE GREAT!!!
I have to admit I like him on Entourage and he was funny on Ellen too. I know publicly he is super douchtastic, but Ari is a gem!
I used to love him, but his ego makes him so unattractive to me now.
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Oh they tell me
There's still time to save my soul
They tell me
-Tracy Chapman "Mountains O' Things"
He was GREAT in One Crazy Summer
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"They lie about marijuana. Tell you pot-smoking makes you unmotivated. Lie! When you're high, you can do everything you normally do, just as well. You just realize that it's not worth the fucking effort"