Blake Wants A Divorce!!!!!
Yes, I wrote Blake and not Blaaaaaaake. I have a feeling Wino is no longer screaming his name. That shit is fucking depressing. Is there such a thing as love if Wino isn't shouting "Blaaaaaaake" like a damn cracked out rooster in need of a fix? I don't think so. If you're in love, break up with that bitch, because it's not going to last. If Wino and Blaaaaaake can't make it. None of us can!
Blake (it feels wrong typing that) has told his lawyer bitches (aka some back alley motherfuckers he's paying in rocks) to begin working on the whole divorce process. The Daily Mail says Blake (this is hard) laid his glazed-over eyes on pictures of the Crackie of the Caribbean all up on that hot piece Josh Bowman in St. Lucia. Like I said before, Wino isn't screeching for her husband. She told The News of the World that she's off the bad shit and now her coochie is only craving Josh. Seriously, her clitty probably gets the shakes when he's not around.
And Wino even said she's forgotten she's even married to Blake (really, really hard). She went on to kick him in the meth sores by saying he was shit in bed. She said, "Almost every time I slept with him it was like I was dead." SPOILER ALERT, Wino! Technically I think you are dead. Your organs haven't worked properly since '06.
First Brit Brit cleans up her shit and is no longer entertaining us with her nightly tour of gas stations while flashing her creamed chitterlings. Now Wino has fallen out of love with crack AND Blake. AND it's like 80 degrees in California during January. What is fucking going on in the world?! IT WASN'T NOT FUNNY! What the hell is next? Rojo Caliente is going to be photographed making out with Jeremy Piven. No. Let's not even joke about that shit.
I can't call him Blake. He will forever be Blaaaaake to me. I will scream his name, because somebody has to and I need to believe! I don't like what fresh tropical air is doing for Wino. It's sobering her up and making her think clearly. That's not right!
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TEAM WINO!!!!
-☮'---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮-
I may appear to be free but I'm just a prisoner of your love.
I heard that! It's been 80 fucking degrees here too. That's just not right, it's unnatural. Every f-cking winter it never gets cold!
Good..now maybe this looser will go away
Between two evils, I always pick the one I never tried before.
It's supposed to be 81F tomorrow in LA but it's windy enough to peel paint.
My heart breaks... What is this world coming to? Turmoil I tell you... turmoil!
berkleybitch, it was BEAUTIFUL today in SF. Me LOVES it....hopefully it'll be nice tomorrow. Like it matters, I'll be stuck in an office most of the day, but at least I'll experience during lunch. MK is probably talking @ SoCal anyway...
STFU!!!
Wino got tired of Blake's "special" look probably, she wanted some other Jew Bro to charm her pants off (literally!) But hey, looks like she's having fun in the Caribbean and might be off the crack and is boozing it up instead. Not much difference really except maybe she's not walking around in bloody ballet slippers instead we get to see her dirty feets and deranged boobies! Lucky us!
STFU!!!
Oh god...
You know, I actually like Amy Winehouse, but I'm like the only person who feels slightly jellis.
This actually has nothing to do with the topic at hand...just that the guy I desperately like has a thing for Amy Winehouse. Part of me really hates when she looks good.
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It puts the lotion on the skin or else it gets the hose again.
fricafrac
This is 2009 and we sadly have to move on with a reshuffling of the cards/
Vadge and Guy, Fishstick and cold play, Amy and blake. and Marley and me.
oh no, blake and amy were meant to be, but that new guy isn't bad. I just hope she gets off the stuff for good cause she's too good for people to be taking cheap shots at her all the time.
no way blake wants a divorce...i thought this was true crackhead love...
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certified in knocking dicks outta mouths...
Oh, her being pictured hanging off of like 6 different guys over the past year wasn't enough for divorce, but the one guy who looks normal and Blake brings the hate?
I'm glad for Amy; I just hope Josh doesn't end up being a douche. Something tells me for sure he already has a girlfriend stashed somewhere.
First Brit Brit cleans up her shit and is no longer entertaining us with her nightly tour of gas stations while flashing her creamed chitterlings. Now Wino has fallen out of love with crack AND Blake
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The difference being that Amy can actually STILL be entertaining if she's straight.
♥ ThreadKilla!
Pose Like a Chola
VOTE FOR MK EVERY DAY!
What a shock. They were so good together.
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"Two whores don't make a right"-- M.K.
"Any guy who values stick thin and young over smarts and personality isn't worth it and has NOTHING interesting to say anyway."-- Mrs. Kravitz
Submitted by pearface on Sun, 01/11/2009 - 7:51pm.
Can anyone link me to the video where Wino is screaming "BLAAAAAAAKE!"
I tried looking for it but couldn't find it...
...wasn't that at the Grammy's?
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Submitted by MrPossumsMama on Thu, 01/08/2009 - 12:18am.
Vote for MK - he's coming in 2nd by 2000 votes
http://2008.weblogawards.org/polls/best-gossip-blog/
Polls close Feb 13
They're like Tommy Lee and Pam Anderson or Liz Taylor and Richard Burton. They'll get divorced and get back together again.
It's great that Amy is cleaning up a bit and forgetting about that loser, but she'll be a mess again as soon as she gets home. She should spend a year in St. Lucia, if they'll have her.
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Nut allergies: a Yuppie invention
http://www.latimes.com/news/opinion/la-oe-stein9-2009jan09,0,3149168.col...
Submitted by Farrah on Sun, 01/11/2009 - 8:14pm.
Submitted by lizardbits1 on Sun, 01/11/2009 - 8:08pm.
Hollyweird NEEDS you.
NOW!
*****
Pfah! Can I bring my ice cream? And will I make more money? And can I sit on my ass? And have a hot dude (pref of the Hugh Jackman persuasion) do my dishes in nothing but an apron?
Submitted by lizardbits1 on Sun, 01/11/2009 - 8:08pm.
Hollyweird NEEDS you.
NOW!
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www.va-holocaust.com.
Tolerance Through Education
Lindsay will be the one to pull the drama suicide attempt, not Sam.
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"Reggie's gonna come out here and really beat your ass."
-Kim Kardashian to paparazzi who brought up her sex tape
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAH - fucking peed on bitch
I suppose all the ass he got and gave in prison wasn't cheating.......fucktard.
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"Reggie's gonna come out here and really beat your ass."
-Kim Kardashian to paparazzi who brought up her sex tape
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAH - fucking peed on bitch
Bitch is having the "Blaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaake" tattoo removed, according to the tabloids over here. Clearly, this shit is fo real.
Submitted by Farrah on Sun, 01/11/2009 - 7:57pm.
Submitted by shut the smurf up on Sun, 01/11/2009 - 7:52pm.
Wait a minute.... what about another pregnancy for Bristol Palin??
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pffttt. Like that one is gonna stop popping them out. Plus, the bitch is gonna marry the baby daddy,so, boring.
We need DRUGS, DUIs, SCREAMING, FIGHTING...
DRAMZ. We need DRAMZ.
*****
shit, Farrah! You're hard up! herm...
Tommy finally comes out of the closet, ditches Suri, Katie, and takes all Co$ money he can and runs to Timbuktu where he starts a gay utopian colony where they run around and chant to their God, Tim Curry (dressed in vintage Legend costuming no less!)
John Travolta, still reeling from his son's death and Tommy ditching him, comes out with an expose about the Co$ and leaks the fact that Dick Cheney was a Co$er and started the war in the Mideast to prepare a landing strip for Xenu.
This does not go over well in the White House as Bush is found behind his desk in the Oval Office a la "Dead Poet's Society" with a pitiful letter explaining it was all Laura's and Barbara's fault that he was president... he just wanted to be a pretty pretty princess.
This puts the US into shock and Obama has to say something nice and caring but instead does a good impersonation of what's his butt from Blazing Saddles: "Where the white women at?" He instantly gets impeached and his ass beat by Jesse Jackson.
Lohan and Wino somehow get together and a sex tape leaks... unfortunately everybody who sees it dies after seven days.
Britbrit escapes her cage before a show and starts to gnaw on a fan's legs... much to the fan's delight.
The Olsen twins also have a sex tape leak... of them together... frat boys everywhere rejoice.
And I'm tired of coming up with shit... hope it at least perks your interest.
Submitted by Farrah on Sun, 01/11/2009 - 7:57pm.
Submitted by shut the smurf up on Sun, 01/11/2009 - 7:52pm.
A diff baby daddy is a given. we are alking about the Palins
Amy will find someone who's equally unhealthy for her, don't worry, folks.
Submitted by shut the smurf up on Sun, 01/11/2009 - 7:52pm.
Wait a minute.... what about another pregnancy for Bristol Palin??
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pffttt. Like that one is gonna stop popping them out. Plus, the bitch is gonna marry the baby daddy,so, boring.
We need DRUGS, DUIs, SCREAMING, FIGHTING...
DRAMZ. We need DRAMZ.
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www.va-holocaust.com.
Tolerance Through Education
Hey MK, it's not quite 80 degrees in Cali right now, it's only 63 degrees out here in NorCal right now :(.
Submitted by shut the smurf up on Sun, 01/11/2009 - 7:52pm.
Wait a minute.... what about another pregnancy for Bristol Palin??
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The only way to make that interesting is if it's the love child of Sarah's ex-brother in law... ya know... the one that they tried to fire?
pearface, this is the only one I've seen.
http://www.popsugar.com/1033917
Amy doesn't make my skin crawl looking at her in that picture. WTF?
Wait a minute.... what about another pregnancy for Bristol Palin??
Can anyone link me to the video where Wino is screaming "BLAAAAAAAKE!"
I tried looking for it but couldn't find it...
Submitted by Farrah on Sun, 01/11/2009 - 7:46pm.
as Funny as the Hohans sound, I would like to see the cyrus mess happening.
a gay Jonas brothers caught would be entertaining too!!!
OMG I'm getting too excited!
An almost on topic question: Sean Penn still married to Robin Wright?
Just a twist. A twist that makes me wanna run to the restroom.
In other news... I'm working on a pint of Haagen Dazs, feeling a little guilty, but not really giving a shit. It's so yummy!
Whaaaa...no live Golden Globe coverage?
Don't worry Michael. This ain't over. She's out of her element right now with a HOT piece of ass. She will back on the pipe the minute her feet touch the ground in Camden.
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...do you know what Ed Gein used to say about women?
Submitted by lizardbits1 on Sun, 01/11/2009 - 7:41pm.
oh hellz yeah it has potential!
but i still think we should throw in a preggo Ali and a DUI for Cody.
Granma gets caught with a 15-year....
mmm.... possibilities, indeed.
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www.va-holocaust.com.
Tolerance Through Education
Submitted by Monalicious on Sun, 01/11/2009 - 7:41pm.
I Think Ali need to go to rehab first, and... then get pregnant..."
White oprah can blame it on the Bastard sister Michael had
lizardbits, I agree with everything you said except the camel toe. Moose knuckle!
Considering these junkies spent a total of roughly 3 months together as husband and wife before Blake got tossed in the slammer, I'm amazed their marriage has lasted this long.
This is some BENJAMIN BUTTON'S SHIT!!!!
Submitted by shut the smurf up on Sun, 01/11/2009 - 7:36pm.
Submitted by Monalicious on Sun, 01/11/2009 - 7:34pm
we have all the Disney sluts, a pregnancy in the cyrus future doesn't seem too streched
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Unlike Miley's hymen. Although I'm sure it was finger related, because she's a virgin, right? :)
Mmmm... Lohan & SamRo thingy... Sammy will try to commit suicide to get Linds to see the error of her ways and stop the peen, but Linds will already have a new lay and blog about the whole thing saying Sam was always a weak person and she never loved her because it's religiously wrong to love a woman.
Michael, in the mean time, will pull up his daddy jeans so far up he'll have a camel toe and start calling Sam a slut and a agent of the devil and the rest of it for making his little girl go down the wrong path. She's an innocent, after all!
Mark will get sick of this shit, go and fuck Lindsey just cause he can and steal all his sister's shit back from her, because, let's face it, she's not going to give back all those nice lesbo pressies that Sam got her.
Mark, now on charges, will break down and start shouting "YOU FUCKING CUNT YOU BROKE MY BABY SISTER'S HEART!!! I WANT TO EAT YOUR SOUL!!!" in the court room...
face it Farrah, it does have potential!
A knocked-up Hannah Montana would be priceless.........
Why does something tell me Ali Lohan might end up pregnant just for the publisity? I wouldn't put it past Dian to hand her daughter a turky baster full of baby batter! Or, take her out whoring to show her how it's done!
Living well is the best revenge.......
Damn, another one bites the dust..or in this case, another one sniffs the powdery white dust. But good for them, they're obviously both very toxic for one another. See what good some sober sexy d*** can do for a woman?!
P.S. MK, are we live blogging the Golden Globes tonight? You whores say the funniest sh** during those things..=)
*****"Don't have sex, because you will get pregnant and die. Don't have sex in the missionary position, don't have sex standing up, just don't do it, OK, promise? OK, now everybody take some rubbers."*****
I would like to see Zac Ef-off get caught blowing a tranny behind a 7-11 dumpster for a dime bag of crack...
_____________________对您的和平_____________________
When you have been thru hell and life's not done with you yet...
Don't look for what's lost but live for what's left...Niller...
Fall from grace???
what about a brangelina separation and a Holie druging it up in a more obvious way?
Who would I like to see fall really hard from grace, mmmmmmmm...
_____________________对您的和平_____________________
When you have been thru hell and life's not done with you yet...
Don't look for what's lost but live for what's left...Niller...
Can anyone link me to the video where Wino is screaming "BLAAAAAAAKE!"
I tried looking for it but couldn't find it.
Submitted by Monalicious on Sun, 01/11/2009 - 7:34pm
we have all the Disney sluts, a pregnancy in the cyrus future doesn't seem too streched
Submitted by shut the smurf up on Sun, 01/11/2009 - 7:31pm.
Farrah, I think L.ho is going to crazy Shitbey style
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oohh, yeah, i forgot Dina HoHan has a lot of potential (snorts too much coke)
Give me a pregnant Ali HoHan and i think i'll cope..
FOR NOW!
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www.va-holocaust.com.
Tolerance Through Education