Just As Long As His Eyebrows Are Okay
Manchester United footballer and the star of many homo's dreams, Cristiano Ronaldo, completely annihilated his £200,000 Ferrari in a car crash earlier today. The eyebrow deities were with Cristiano, because he walked away with all his brow hairs perfectly in place. You know he has his precious brows insured.
The crash happened around 10:30 this morning while Cristiano was driving through a tunnel in Manchester. For some strange reason, he hit the side of the wall, sending the barrier and his car parts flying across the road. This is probably what happened: Cristiano got a glimpse of his sexy self in the rearview mirror, causing grease to explode from his every pore which made the break pedal a little oily and then...well... you know what happened next. It's dangerous being that gorgeous.
Cristiano pretty much sweats liquid gold, so The Sun says he's just going to write off the car. The price of the Ferrari is what he makes every other week. Eh.
A £200,000 Ferrari can be replaced with the kick of a ball, but having stunning eyebrows that make people get on their knees and pray is irreplaceable.
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Submitted by Sarah M on Thu, 01/08/2009 - 10:07am.
What color lip gloss is that?
It looks like one of those new Chapstick shimmers.
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Dick happens! - MK
he's ugly.
jmo.
Of course I didnt fucking win... http://shoptherapy.pronto.com/pronto/and-the-winner-is-2/ but thanks to everyone who voted :)
Guidos. Awesomely bad bunch of loons.
Submitted by rotten_egg on Thu, 01/08/2009 - 11:09am.
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Kinda looks like he belongs with that prom crew - the orange people from New Jersey. What tag was that filed under? Remember?
Submitted by kdracofan on Thu, 01/08/2009 - 10:22am.
christine the hoff on Thu, 01/08/2009 - 10:18am.
"...f**k, he looks like if you threw something at him, he'd run away screaming"
I can't stop laughing
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I don't know or care who Ronaldo-whatever is, but he looks like a damn guido. The tons of hair gel, the gay earring and the lipgloss... hahahaha!!!. I can say EWWWW!! with a scream of capital letters for his hands. The shape is ok, but they are too smooth and wringle-free and manly-free. This guy is a twinkie, right?!.
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-"I am not about to deal with unstable people" - HEART ANGELINA.
Steaks and gas!
Charles Manson
Niiice!
Sup miisy,
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Submitted by Charles Manson on Thu, 01/08/2009 - 10:58am.
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LoFrackingL!!!!
Steaks and gas? Who are you - Napoleon Dynamite?
Mr. Manson! It's wonderful to see you again! We totally missed your sweet thoughtful prose and those bedroom eyes of yours!
Submitted by Charles Manson on Thu, 01/08/2009 - 10:58am.
WELL LET US GODDAMN FUCKING SEE. YOU ARE WEARING A FUCKING TAG HEUER WATCH AND A PAIR OF MOTHERFUCKING DIAMOND STUDS THAT ARE PROBABLY WORTH ABOUT 2 YEARS OF MY GODDAMN SALARY AND YOU MOTHERFUCKING CRASHED YOUR FUCKING 200,000 RACE FUCKING CAR. I AM REALLY FUCKING SORRY ABOUT THAT. NOW CAN YOU FUCKING SLIDE ABOUT 10,000 MY WAY BECAUSE THAT WOULD GODDAMN MOTHERFUCKING BUY A HELL OF A LOT OF STEAKS AND GAS.
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You rock! :D
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All we are....is dust in the wind, dude.
-Ted "Theodore" Logan
looks like that was an AWESOME crash. Wish I could've been there when it happened! That's right...rubbernecker!
Konichiwa Biches!!
Does nothing for me....looks super ghey!
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All we are....is dust in the wind, dude.
-Ted "Theodore" Logan
Now I know European men have a different standard of gayness, but he's setting off my gaydar. Even if he's not gay, he's not man enough for me.
Submitted by luckycharms: "There is something inherently unnatural about a man having manicured eyebrows. Trim them up, get rid of the unibrow, and if they have really thick ones, scale it down a little. But to pluck them and shape them like a woman's, no. I don't trust guys who do that."
I totally agree.
Mr. Manson
I was waiting for you to come here and show us all how it's done.
Can I be your girlfriend/ I know you're married, so we'll just meet for coffee and giggle.
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Child? Fucking grown-man poo. Your anus will be in grown-man shambles.
hahaha STEAKS AND GAS!!
(oh also, look at the tag hahaha)
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Fuck 'Em If They Can't Take A Joke
a message from the Church of the SubGenius
No Hogans involved?
Shiney, shiney Ladyboy!
"Come, Watson! There's fuckery afoot!."
WELL LET US GODDAMN FUCKING SEE. YOU ARE WEARING A FUCKING TAG HEUER WATCH AND A PAIR OF MOTHERFUCKING DIAMOND STUDS THAT ARE PROBABLY WORTH ABOUT 2 YEARS OF MY GODDAMN SALARY AND YOU MOTHERFUCKING CRASHED YOUR FUCKING 200,000 RACE FUCKING CAR. I AM REALLY FUCKING SORRY ABOUT THAT. NOW CAN YOU FUCKING SLIDE ABOUT 10,000 MY WAY BECAUSE THAT WOULD GODDAMN MOTHERFUCKING BUY A HELL OF A LOT OF STEAKS AND GAS.
PSL
hahahaha totally!
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You got your problems, I got my hash pipe
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ba_NNKyUwEE
"Bench sucking is only for after midnight. Dumb blue motherfucker!" MK 12.30.08
Submitted by haris pilton on Thu, 01/08/2009 - 10:53am.
Is he wearing lip gloss?
naw, that's just leftover anal lube from the last trick he did in the men's room.
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Child? Fucking grown-man poo. Your anus will be in grown-man shambles.
Shoulda named him Crisco.
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I want to put on my my my my my boogie shoes.
I haven't seen that much Vaseline since my husband and I......oh, nevermind.
Is he wearing lip gloss?
Dee, he and Paris should switch hands.
Hers are more manly.
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"Some people are just bad at taking drugs.”
- Lily Allen
He has very pretty hands. He could be a hand model, yanno if the football thing doesn't work out.
He just looks totally oily to me. Icky.
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Hopes can always go up, tears can only come down.
He looks like a total douche in that picture. I used to think he was good looking. Sigh.
This Homo does not share in your enthusiasm for this dude!
xo
Rants, Thoughts & Merde
http://rantsthoughtsmerde.blogspot.com
There is something inherently unnatural about a man having manicured eyebrows. Trim them up, get rid of the unibrow, and if they have really thick ones, scale it down a little. But to pluck them and shape them like a woman's, no. I don't trust guys who do that.
Babe I said you messed up my happy home, and made me mistreat my only child--Led Zeppelin
Ewwww Snowie!!! glazed donuts look slimey and greasy too!! cow snatch donut! LMAO!!!
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You got your problems, I got my hash pipe
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ba_NNKyUwEE
"Bench sucking is only for after midnight. Dumb blue motherfucker!" MK 12.30.08
Does he bathe in Extra-Douchey Olive Oil?
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Chicago area 5K race 2009: http://rallyforautism.com/
He plays for Manure, it's a shame the car didn't survive and not him.
*prepares for hell*
We're glad the eyebrows are safe.
I want to thank Hekki for visiting my site and leaving a commment. Thank You, Friend.
I always look for your comments here. Now, I hope you will do double duty and stop by.
You are wise and see through shit, that's why I love you.
Who?
I don't know who this is but he's ugly and what the hell is going on with that hand? it looks fake....who stands like that?
What-ever NEXT!
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I have some flaming gay queen pals but he is greasy and flaming..that is quite combustible.
MISS PRISSSSSSSS how you gonna spoil my DONUT like that! don't remind me of that shit! LOL
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"This is MK. He started it" angel_i
"thats my favorite bible saying bitch!"
vote for MK come on hurry up vote often
http://2008.weblogawards.org/polls/best-gossip-blog/
madam s.
someone at a leather bar named Bruce cracked this fucker's nuts a long time ago...
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Child? Fucking grown-man poo. Your anus will be in grown-man shambles.
eww he always looks greasy and slimy like he just came out of that cow's snatch
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You got your problems, I got my hash pipe
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ba_NNKyUwEE
"Bench sucking is only for after midnight. Dumb blue motherfucker!" MK 12.30.08
christine the hoff,
There's a joke about him performing in The Nutcracker somewhere in there, but I don't have it in me. Where's Team Valtrex when we need him?
EW he is way to pretty, and self centered..not hot
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Christmas is over :(
Someone's momma shoulda drowned this one at birth and tried again. Ew.
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... so self aware, so full of shit.
At first I thought this was the guy from "The Crying Game"
No, he isn't pretty, just like here in the states, he is an entitled over privileged Athlete.
Worshiped by aspiring kids and misleading that he is the picture of ultimate success.
*calls to make eyebrow waxing appointment*
"Going gray is like ejaculating. You know it can happen prematurely, but when it actually does, it's a total shock." MAH BOO!!!
VOTE FOR MK
http://2008.weblogawards.org/polls/best-gossip-blog/
Submitted by kdracofan on Thu, 01/08/2009 - 10:22am.
well, seriously, He'd lose at a game of nerf football.
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Child? Fucking grown-man poo. Your anus will be in grown-man shambles.
I think he's a ballerina, he'd look so cute mincing about in a pink tulle tu-tu.
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Child? Fucking grown-man poo. Your anus will be in grown-man shambles.
christine the hoff on Thu, 01/08/2009 - 10:18am.
"...fuck, he looks like if you threw something at him, he'd run away screaming"
I can't stop laughing
Aside from the tux, he's looking very much the Staten Islander.
Missy, word
"climbs in bed, hogs blanket"
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Child? Fucking grown-man poo. Your anus will be in grown-man shambles.