These Two Have A New Baby
Jennifer Garner released a baby into this black-hearted world sometime this afternoon. Jen and Ben already have a toothy 3-year-old they call Violet.
Jennifer's spokesbitch told People, "Jennifer Garner and Ben Affleck gave birth to a healthy baby girl." The bitch did not fess up a name.
I'm really hoping they name their girl something meaningful. I'm thinking JLo? Or maybe Fishsticks? Or maybe Band-Aid? Or SavaMarriage? And if they are going to keep with the flower tradition, they better pick a hot flower name like Baby's Breath, Goldenrod, Honeysuckle, Morning Glory or Petunia.
But knowing these two boring boiled rutabagas, they gave her a memaw name like Rose, Ethel, Bertha, Gertrude or Myrtle. Oh shit. I really hope they named her Ethel. Nobody names their baby Ethel anymore! Come to think of it, nothing is named Ethel anymore. The next time you bring a baby, dog, cat, plant, rodent, cockroach, fish, homeless person or hooker into your home, you have to name them Ethel. The name must be kept alive!
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Now he and his love Matt Damon have matching sets of daughters.
Violet does always look happy, but I bet she's going to be pissed about this. In my experience, you don't mess with a 3-year-old without suffering for it.
What a fucking dildo!!!! You tell that IDIOT that Ethel is one of the premier names of the world!! In fact - in biblical times "Ethel" meant 'Fat Queen who sits on face and CRUSHES the breath out of some asshole'. Amen.
Sincerely yours in Christ,
Reverend Fred J. Mertz
they put you in jail for wearing red shoes in East Hampton, it's a nasty republican town
I don't believe it - my saddo sister just named her new kitten Ethel. Is there a club for these losers who think they're so sool?
~*RENZSTAR*~
Dear MK,
I beg to differ!
My ex lovers pussy is named Ethel. He would have named the other cat Fred if it weren't for the douche bag he was dating before me naming it "tiberius" or some bullshit like that.
whatev.
My grandmother's name was Ethel! Ethel Mae Post, about as old-fashioned a name you can get. Then again, she was born in 1899...
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"Edwina's insides were a rocky place where my seed could find no purchase. " -- H.I. McDunnough
PSL- true. I am not nuts about this couple (I think he's still shady and has a yen for the hos..) and she is so bland ,She sucked in Juno haha. But their kid is happy so good! LEt's hope the next one is too I am sure she will be.
Anyway I haven't liked this chick since she royally dissed Gary Busey on the red carpet. The nerve! She rolled her eyes at him to Ryan Seacrest. Sorry but I'm a little protective of the Busey, haha.
I got a dog years ago and named the little bitch Ethel....she never answered to me. THen the name Ehtel just reminded me of Ethenol. And I would get pissed and reminded that my car was always low on ethel/ethenol. Her name is Princess now. Pringis actually. Whoever had her before misspelled Princess, dumbass.
Awwww. Thanks for the "Ethel" shout out. That was my grandma's name and she was the best!
I'm thinking it may have just been an error of phrasing on the part of the spokesbitch. She probably meant to say Garner gave birth to a girl but needed to get Ben's name in the sentence as well and couldn't come up with another way to say it. Fire her! I have to say though it really does get on my wick when people say "we're pregnant" like the man's up the duff too. I always think, no dear you may both be about to have a baby, but when it comes to growing it in your belly and squeezing it out of your vagina, I'm thinking it will mainly be up to you!
As for the baby name, I think they should call it he's-just-not-that-into-you Affleck-Garner as this phrase was surely invented for this couple. And I have to say looking at this pic I can kind of see why. I know she's very pregnant and all, but she looks pretty normal and dare I say even homely here, its certainly not the all-out pregnancy glamour gone for by the likes of JHo and Angie Jo. She just seems too normal for him.
What you didn't know she's been having an affair with Gary Busey? that kid might be his...after Gary kissed Jen in the neck at the Oscars, she was his, vampire style. LOL
Submitted by RichBitch" "Jennifer Garner and Ben Affleck gave birth to a healthy baby girl."
What kind of PC shite is that statement?
That kind of thing fucks me off. If you don't know what I have a problem with in that statement then you're retarded (like Ben and Jen's spokeswhore)."
Amen. His contribution to all that was a shiver and pull-out. Fuck that. If men had to give birth, the human race would grind to a halt.
Or they'd find some way to delegate the job to women.
one thing I have to say is Violet always looks happy. I have never seen anything but a smile on that kid's face. They must be doing something right.
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Submitted by parissucksliterally :got an excuse for Port-au-Prince? Can you even tell me where it is without Googling it?
Submitted by carebearloves on Tue, 12/30/2008 - 5:46pm.
its a person from france.
what I really want to know is: are they 'over the moon' about their new baby - anyone?
Such a boring couple but... hey ..congratulations or whatever.
Between two evils, I always pick the one I never tried before.
I like them and he looks better with her, more comfortable, than he did with JoLo. I love the video where she yells at photographers hassling her when she was out with Violet and yelled in their faces at them...I thought she was going to go all "Alias" on them! LOL
Violet is a really cute little girl and that's saying a lot coming from me, I don't really like kids at all. Well, I do like kids but I can never finish a whole one by myself.
http://artbybillie.net
I like these two. They don't feel the need to always be "on" for the cameras and shit. They're the anti-Beckhams.
Submitted by lizzieb on Wed, 01/07/2009 - 9:05am.
That depends. Is there a chance you might give birth one day?
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not a chance, hun. There was a time i felt bad i couldn't have cheetolings, but now.. *phew*!
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www.va-holocaust.com.
Tolerance Through Education
When I was little my mother always called vaginas "Ethels" so the name does live on. In my pants.
Submitted by Farrah on Wed, 01/07/2009 - 8:40am.
Submitted by lizzieb on Wed, 01/07/2009 - 8:34am.
*shaking* tha..that..that's how it feels like??
That depends. Is there a chance you might give birth one day? Then the answer is no, of course not, it's a lovely experience. Are you not going to, i.e male or tubes tied? Then the answer is yes.
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If you can't be a good example, be a horrible warning. I'm talking to you actually.
Just please don't tell me that they are "over the moon".
Submitted by lizzieb on Wed, 01/07/2009 - 8:34am.
I agree. HELLO SPOKESPERSON. Did Ben swell up to the size of a house? Did his tits enter the room five minutes before he did? Did he have to give up everything that makes life worth living and exist on lean protein and fruit and veg? Did he have a million bored looking people staring up his vagina to the point that you put your legs in the air at the dentist? Did he shit a basketball or be circumcised with a rusty chainsaw?
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*shaking* tha..that..that's how it feels like??
btw, Ben DID swell up to the size of a house, but due to "everything that makes life worth living".. boozing and eating everything in sight.
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www.va-holocaust.com.
Tolerance Through Education
Hahahahaha My Mother in laws name is Ethel....
Submitted by RichBitch on Wed, 01/07/2009 - 6:18am.
"Jennifer Garner and Ben Affleck gave birth to a healthy baby girl."
What kind of PC shite is that statement?
That kind of thing fucks me off. If you don't know what I have a problem with in that statement then you're retarded (like Ben and Jen's spokeswhore).
I agree. HELLO SPOKESPERSON. Did Ben swell up to the size of a house? Did his tits enter the room five minutes before he did? Did he have to give up everything that makes life worth living and exist on lean protein and fruit and veg? Did he have a million bored looking people staring up his vagina to the point that you put your legs in the air at the dentist? Did he shit a basketball or be circumcised with a rusty chainsaw? No? Then Jennifer gave birth you fucking morons.
Well done Jen. Don't call her Lily-it's a nice name but here in the UK we are drowning in girls called Lily.
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If you can't be a good example, be a horrible warning. I'm talking to you actually.
FInally
now the divorce proceedings can move ahead
xoxox
The war isn't working.
she annoys the hell outta me
off topic: what? no off topicness? good ;)
**whatever**
finally she had the baby!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
"Jennifer Garner and Ben Affleck gave birth to a healthy baby girl."
What kind of PC shite is that statement?
That kind of thing fucks me off. If you don't know what I have a problem with in that statement then you're retarded (like Ben and Jen's spokeswhore).
speaking of Grandma names, my grandma's name is Gertrude all the grandkids call her Dirty Gertie, it was even written on her 90th b-day cake this past year
curtain up! light the lights! this little ethel gave daddy the quite a fright! He's not there, he won't be! From....now....on....EVERYTHING"S coming up daddy-less! EVERYTHING'S coming up papa-gone! EVERYTHING'S coming in up single-mom for ethel and jennnn and jennnnnnn and jennnnnnnnnnn!!!!!!!!
hate sucks...and being a sucker i really resent that...
Jen and Ben look so alike to me. Don't they say couples who stay together start to look like each other? I can't imagine them looking any more alike if they stay married...
Jen was cutish when she was married to Scott Foley. There was something shiny and sparkly to her then. Like the pretty but bland girl next door who just *shone.* Like a Noxema commercial personified. But maybe that was youth. That's gone. Now she's just the mom next door... a little overworked, a little out of love... actually, she's depressing to look at.
She somehow made Maxim's Top 100 Hottest list. I don't really understand that, but whatever. She doesn't seem to be an attention-whore and she's blindly making babies with a complete douchebag who will certainly infect her with some disease he brings home. I can't hate on her.
☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠
BIGGEST COMPLIMENT EVER:
"skybitch, you are one of most disgusting posters here ever. period."
Submitted by ImpertinentVixen on Tue, 01/06/2009 - 11:47pm.
I think a boy would have been a better Band-Aid baby, maybe Ben would have stuck around for a boy.
...if Ben wants boys he needs to twerk on his sperm and start throwing some Ys
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"Hasta la bye bye!"
I don't really have feelings one way or the other for Jennifer.. all I know is Alias bored me to tears somehow, she is somewhat bland. And Affleck, theres just this doucheyness about him and I sometimes get traces of it when I watch Casey.. who still is much better than his brother
hmm cant say anything bad about Jennifer Garner. finally she had the baby. Jen Garner makes me smile somehow...and I am a total bitch sometimes. oh well...gosh why I am a softy today...arrrgh. Maybe it's from seeing her daughter Violet's smiles on other pics and those cute dimples. damn it...(talking to self) I am a softy with this chick. Ben on the other hand...still confused on the guy. but hopefully this marriage works in the Hollyweird world. If not....we'll talk about it later when that happens. goodnight my darlings!!!
Coma Caca!!
Congrats to both couple!
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Petunia Affleck...........catchy name.
Congrats to Daredevil and Elektra on their second baby, may you have meaningful nights of sleep, er, someday.
Aw! I love old lady names! I have a 5-pound silver Persian named 'Midge'. I named her as a kitten; she just never got bigger.
My sister had a baby girl today too!!!!
Ben Affleck is a douche. I've always kinda liked Jennifer Garner though. SHE can do better than that. That kid names is normal. AT least she isn't named, orange, apple or grape...
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Let me dirty up your mind.
FUCK NO!!! PEREZ ON THAT AD!!!! AND PARASITE BELOW!!! AHHHH!!! MAKE IT STOP! MAKE IT STOP! AGHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Let me dirty up your mind.
My name is Ruby =)That's why I was being silly and said they should name thier baby Ruby. It sure beats Bronx Mowgli Wentz!
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My grandfather's older sister, born around 1905, was named Ruby. Their dad, born around 1885, was named Jett, which is now kinda creepy when I think about it. (We've had a few Jetts in the family since then, so it's become a family name. But none of us are Xenu worshippers.)
Am I the only one who fucking hates the name Abigail? It's one step above Gertrude.
And those two are fuck.pigs.
She's adorable! At least she's not some nasty skank like Paris, etc.
forget the memaw names! pottery barn candle names are IN for babies! (thanks to the palins), try willow, or ivy, or moosehead, something original, puleeze!
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"And I went through this whole thing; am I gay?! Am I straight?! And I realized: I'm just slutty." ~Margaret Cho
"This is supposed to be about delicious booze!" ~MK
Is anyone else addicted to the new Bad Girls Club? That shit is skankalicious! MK why aren't you covering this whore show? Its Rock of Love on Hennessy and Beer Bong!
"Come on Gloria..."
-Hank Azaria "The Birdcage"
Gosh, didn't she used to be somewhat cute? She is so plain and ugly. And he just looks disgustingly sleezy. Did marriage and babies make these two just completely unattractive. They will never act on the big screen again... Oh, I guess they never really ever did! LOL!
I'm feelin' Edna...
Yeah, I like Edna Hortense Myrtle Louise Afflected...That's just me...
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Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...
I'm feeling Ethel. I hope they go with Ethel.