At Least It's Not Mop Head
I was a little worried when my arch rival CHERYL BURKE and that steaming cup of hot douche water Maksim Chmerkovskiy were pictured holding hands last September. I became a little more worried when Maksim called CHERYL BURKE a fat mop, because that's something douchebags in love say about the object of their affection. I am pleased to announce that Maksim is promised to be married and it's not to Mop Head. It's to Mario Lopez's former beard: Karina Smirnoff Ice.
E! News says that 28-year-old Maksim asked 30-year-old Smirnoff Ice to be his on New Year's Eve. They apparently became loooovers while traveling together on the Dancing with the Has-Beens tour. They are both from Ukraine, so I'm hoping their wedding will be filled with gold, white feathers and rhinestones. Naturally.
I sort of knew they were humping on each other's fake-tanned asses, but this whole "getting married" thing is a little surprising. The thought probably popped into Maksim's pretty little head all of a sudden. He immediately bopped Smirnoff Ice over the head with his club, dragged her to his cave which is covered in pictures of himself (you know it is) and said to her, "You be my wife." If I was to ever get engaged, that's how I want it to go down.
And Karina should get her nose rotated again before the wedding. Her nose is starting to look like a lizard's head and that's not pretty.
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Submitted by christine the hoff on Sun, 01/04/2009 - 1:02pm.
...Can I sniff them first?... WHAT!
OT: I used to like Maksim. It seems like the hotness is fading somewhat. Maybe it's because he's got skanks all around him.
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"I'm going to count to three, there will not be a four. Give me... the code." Hans Gruber, Die Hard
I need a new pair of panties just thinking about this.
Hysteria,
I love your headband! Haaahaaahaaa
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her nose looks like a rocket launcher
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oh God I hate the fucking laundromat...
moaning, sluts.
anyone wanna wash my delicates?
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Child? Fucking grown-man poo. Your anus will be in grown-man shambles.
Submitted by TITS on Sun, 01/04/2009 - 12:56pm.
He looks like the type to whack off into a sock.
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*gasp!* *sob* *slowly walking away..hanging little sock monkey head..dragging little sock monkey tail* *jumping in hamper* *closing lid* *muttering* Meanie.
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That lil' lint bastid will be back within the hour snorting your Borax with a rolled up dollar bill. Trust....TigerLilly 10.24.2008
Submitted by Sugaroo on Sun, 01/04/2009 - 12:23pm.
"It's semi-frustrating when your name actually becomes a synonym for douche bag."
Awww. That kind of rare self-awareness is actually endearing.
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Wow, this is graphic.
Submitted by Sock-Monkey on Sun, 01/04/2009 - 12:32pm.
Hope they is both pillow biters.
*
He looks like the type to whack off into a sock.
.o.o.o.o.0.0.0.O.O.O.0.0.0.o.o.o.o.
"And how fat does one have to be to get dead animals trapped on your person?" madam s
Is this just an extremely bad picture of her or does she look like this all the time? She's a little otherworldly looking. The otherworld being a hollow tree where evil cookies are made.
that open-shirt look is OUT OF CONTROL.
Submitted by angel_i on Sun, 01/04/2009 - 12:36pm.
Submitted by El Bastardo on Sun, 01/04/2009 - 12:26pm.
What other Nicole Richie is there?
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HAY! I just came here to say Trudat and ELB hadda get all nasty! LEAVE NICOLE ALOOOOOOOOOOOOOONNNNE!
===You gotta admit, wearing headbands have changed Nicole Richie's life. She was too fat for them a few years back.
@Sandbitch: Oops, fuhgot. I pilled it up a bit too much last nite.
Submitted by breaktheleash on Sun, 01/04/2009 - 12:26pm.
Sandbitch! Didn't see you there... Happy Sunday!
==Thanks Leash! It's already Monday Downunder. Happy Monday!
Is he Cro-Magnon?
Submitted by El Bastardo on Sun, 01/04/2009 - 12:26pm.
Submitted by Sandbitch on Sun, 01/04/2009 - 12:24pm.
He looks like an uglier Ben Afleck, she an ugly Nicole Ritchie.
What other Nicole Richie is there?
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HAY! I just came here to say Trudat and ELB hadda get all nasty! LEAVE NICOLE ALOOOOOOOOOOOOOONNNNE!
♥ ThreadKilla!
My Favourite DListed Things!
It might seem like I'm stalking you. I'm not.
You just go on about your business:)
The wedding will be sponsored by Velveeta.
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"I think we'll need some more FBI guys."
Open shirt = C H E E S E Y
Submitted by parissucksliterally on Sun, 01/04/2009 - 12:30pm.
Sugaroo, that's fucking funny.
Pete needs to fade awaaaayyyyyyyy.....
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And take Asslee with him. I'm sorry, but I think Fall Out Boy have no talent (not that Asslee does) and the fact that Pete IMADOUCHE Wentz is famous and rich makes me hurl. *hoink*
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Men are like parking spots, the good ones are taken and the free ones are handicapped.
Hope they is both pillow biters.
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That lil' lint bastid will be back within the hour snorting your Borax with a rolled up dollar bill. Trust....TigerLilly 10.24.2008
Submitted by Pauly Shore on Sun, 01/04/2009 - 12:30pm.
I'm sorry, I don't enjoy judging people's appearances, but how is he going to kiss her when she has a beak?
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You need to read this morning's Dita posts. *snicker*
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Men are like parking spots, the good ones are taken and the free ones are handicapped.
I'm sorry, I don't enjoy judging people's appearances, but how is he going to kiss her when she has a beak?
When will this shit show go off the air>!
...I know I know, when people like my Mom finally quit obsessing over it.
I. don't. get. it.
Sugaroo, that's fucking funny.
Pete needs to fade awaaaayyyyyyyy.....
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Submitted by parissucksliterally :got an excuse for Port-au-Prince? Can you even tell me where it is without Googling it?
Submitted by carebearloves on Tue, 12/30/2008 - 5:46pm.
its a person from france.
She has one of the better nose jobs that I've seen. She has a hot lil bod on her and looks an awful lot like a tranny friend of mine, except he has more booty. And booty a good thang.
Submitted by angel_i on Sun, 01/04/2009 - 12:24pm.
Nah. He'll still keep on with the verbal diarrhea.
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Men are like parking spots, the good ones are taken and the free ones are handicapped.
Submitted by Sandbitch on Sun, 01/04/2009 - 12:24pm.
He looks like an uglier Ben Afleck, she an ugly Nicole Ritchie.
What other Nicole Richie is there?
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“MAC gave me 55 lipsticks to test. These are the same lipsticks I got caught stealing by the police when I was 15. How ironic.”
Sandbitch! Didn't see you there... Happy Sunday!
I don't watch this crap, but my relatives do, and I am always making fun of it, much to their chagrin. I said, "isn't this the show where everyone is fucking everyone else?" My SIL was so pissed.
I take offense to the lizard head comment! I'll have you know that I give excellent head!
*slinks off*
He looks like an uglier Ben Afleck, she an ugly Nicole Ritchie.
Happy Sunday back @ ya, Migraine Sally!
Are you at work? Rest assured you're not alone ><
Submitted by Sugaroo on Sun, 01/04/2009 - 12:23pm.
TOTALLY OFF TOPIC:
FAME whore Pete Wentz (above) is spouting off more details of his personal life to anyone who'll listen. The Fall Out Boy tells Blender he stopped reading online media: "I was letting the blogs get to me. It's semi-frustrating when your name actually becomes a synonym for douche bag."
Doesn't take him long to get the hint, does it?
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Does he? Aren't we hinting that he STFU? :P
♥ ThreadKilla!
My Favourite DListed Things!
It might seem like I'm stalking you. I'm not.
You just go on about your business:)
TOTALLY OFF TOPIC:
FAME whore Pete Wentz (above) is spouting off more details of his personal life to anyone who'll listen. The Fall Out Boy tells Blender he stopped reading online media: "I was letting the blogs get to me. It's semi-frustrating when your name actually becomes a synonym for douche bag."
Doesn't take him long to get the hint, does it?
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Men are like parking spots, the good ones are taken and the free ones are handicapped.
Happy Sunday Hookers! Hope you are all getting a little R & R today. me....not so much.
OT, that DWTS is a regular Payton Place, no?
She looks like an evil dwarf tranny. He looks like D'OH!
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“MAC gave me 55 lipsticks to test. These are the same lipsticks I got caught stealing by the police when I was 15. How ironic.”
If that rough-assed ho is 30, then I'm MK's wife.
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Men are like parking spots, the good ones are taken and the free ones are handicapped.
she is quite the Buttaface, eh?
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Submitted by parissucksliterally :got an excuse for Port-au-Prince? Can you even tell me where it is without Googling it?
Submitted by carebearloves on Tue, 12/30/2008 - 5:46pm.
its a person from france.
Are we sure those ages (28 & 30) are not typos?
Nothing wrong with looking older, but these two look older before their time?
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Do not wait for the last judgment. It takes place every day.
Albert Camus