Friday, January 2nd 2009
The "Over The Moon" Watch
Here is case #3,457,485 of a bitch using the phrase "over the moon" to describe a new part of their life. It's my duty to keep track of this kind of overused fuckery.
This one comes from Sarah Palin. She issued this statement yesterday about the birth of her new grandkiddie Tripp Easton Mitchell Johnston: "We are over the moon with the arrival of this healthy, beautiful baby. The road ahead for this young couple will not be easy, but nothing worthwhile is ever easy."
Wait. If this came from Sarah Plain, shouldn't they be "over the dead moose"?
Thanks Michael
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TV- Are you poking fun at story tellers, or are you serious? If you aren't joking, fantastic story. I want to hear more. With an avie like that, you have to have some f'ed up stuff to tell. I only want the truth.
Nite, angel! Sweet dreams! *MUAH*
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BIGGEST COMPLIMENT EVER:
"skybitch, you are one of most disgusting posters here ever. period."
I used to die a lot when I was little, like 5 times before the age of 10. My earliest memory is of convulsing on the bathroom floor from a brain tumor. My second memory is of convulsing on the same floor with Rheumatic fever when I was 4. I also drowned twice and was hit by a car. Each time, they brought me back. I was the guinea pig they perfected CPR on. All by the age of 10. Then, for 25 years, nothing. I thought I lost the recipe. I’ve raced motorcycles, I’ve slept in crackhouses, I’ve been shot once, jumped out of airplanes, done every drug known to man, tried to drink my body weight, and spent way too many years walking around with my abusive personality. Nothing. Then, when I was 35, I got this little tiny bee sting on my finger, and was in cardiac arrest within 2 minutes from anaphylactic shock. All this shit, and I get taken out by a fucking bee? Luckily, my sister pulled into the driveway, saw me dead on the lawn, and administered cpr and a shot of adrenaline. Trip to the hospital, 2 more shots of adrenaline, including one directly into the heart after dying again, and they put me into a hospital bed for the night and tell me to relax. Ever try to relax after 3 shots of adrenaline? I could’ve remodeled the entire hospital, and I thought about assisting with surgery and night rounds. Moral of the story: God wants me dead, but he has REALLY fucking bad aim.
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I am the devil, and I am here to do the devil's work.
When I was a freshman in college, a bunch of us road tripped down to New Orleans for Mardi Gras. I ended up going out with my friend, Kelly, and we headed down to Bourbon Street. Obviously we were drinking our asses off and at one point, I got yelled at by some cops for peeing between some cars on the street. Kelly and I got separated in the crowd and never found each other, so I did my thing and went back to the hotel to pass out. The next morning, the phone rang and it was Kelly. She was in some jail on the other side of the river and had no idea why she had even been arrested. Oh yeah, and the best part...she found her underwear in her pocket. She STILL has no clue what happened that night. I can't even imagine what she was doing to get arrested at Mardi Gras!
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BIGGEST COMPLIMENT EVER:
"skybitch, you are one of most disgusting posters here ever. period."
@Skybitch! NIIIIIIICE! That IS so classy!
I'm off to bed, friends.
Thanks for the good times:)
♥ ThreadKilla!
My Favourite DListed Things!
It might seem like I'm stalking you. I'm not.
You just go on about your business:)
Well Sky, they say the Embassy Suites is just like home, make our home your home! I would have loved to have seen the look on the employees face who drew the short straw on that clean up.
OK.....
Thank GOD I was not with them this one night, but when I was in high school, two of my friends went downtown and hit the bars, then somehow ended up at the Embassy Suites hotel. The next day, one of the gals called me and told me the other one had TAKEN A SHIT on the fucking stairs @ the hotel and they got kicked out. Classy!
*thinking of more*
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BIGGEST COMPLIMENT EVER:
"skybitch, you are one of most disgusting posters here ever. period."
Submitted by devilgirl on Sat, 01/03/2009 - 3:18am.
The cop said no, but I am glad you two are wanting a cab.
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LOL! For reals.
♥ ThreadKilla!
My Favourite DListed Things!
It might seem like I'm stalking you. I'm not.
You just go on about your business:)
Submitted by SkyBitch on Sat, 01/03/2009 - 3:14am.
angel: Your friend threw up ON a cop??? LOLOL!
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Ha! Yahuh! I can't believe I never got hauled in for that - we got caught all the time. Once my guy friend had liquor in a hairspray bottle and we were out back of the (all-ages)club smoking a joint - we tossed the joint so the cops had nothing on us but they checked us and found that hairspray bottle, sniffed it and was about to dump it when my friend starts whining: PLEEEEEEEEEEASE! Please can I take just one more sip! PLEEEEEEEASE! It's all I have! The cop let him too. Ha! And then dumped the rest out and sent us on our way...
♥ ThreadKilla!
My Favourite DListed Things!
It might seem like I'm stalking you. I'm not.
You just go on about your business:)
Skybitch- No kidding, a Sham wow would have made the clean up much easier. My gf had to use a good deal of my big bath towels. So another expense from the ordeal was new towels, cause Brawny just wasn't cutting it.
Angel_i- You make me feel not so alone in the world. I had a drunken night w/a gf. we were so plowed. I fell down a spiral staircase at this one bar nad the patrons were shocked, they swore I was a quad. from the fall. I was just embarassed. My gf was so hammered, so went to haol a cab and it's a cop car she finally understands it isn't a cab, but asks if they can give us a ride to our hotel anyway. The cop said no, but I am glad you two are wanting a cab.
devilgirl: We all owe you some stories! *thinking*
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BIGGEST COMPLIMENT EVER:
"skybitch, you are one of most disgusting posters here ever. period."
angel: Your friend threw up ON a cop??? LOLOL!
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BIGGEST COMPLIMENT EVER:
"skybitch, you are one of most disgusting posters here ever. period."
Angel_i- I just read your stinkbomb story. Love, love .love the electric pole and subsequent outage. Funny stuff. More please
Hey devilgirl, that 'Sham-Wow' commercial just came on and it made me think....I'll bet this all happened before that invention came out. You could have used some of those!
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BIGGEST COMPLIMENT EVER:
"skybitch, you are one of most disgusting posters here ever. period."
@devilgirl: I told the stinkbomb story....below:) I gots mostly snippets and mostly about being drunk LOL!
Like, my gf threw up on a cop once while we were telling him "No, ocifer, we don't drink - we're underage!"
And my "friend's" cokewhore gf who pulled this great move. We were SO smart - we used to drink on a hill that led straight to a major intersection. Dumbbitch fell BACKWARDS down the hill. She did a somersault, landed on her feet and spilled NOT ONE DROP of her mickey; and even better, she din't die! YAY! Go figure.
Not drunk - my gf were walking around late at night when we happen on this unlocked car. How did we know it was unlocked? We were checking them all, of course! Low and behold, it had the keys in it! We got in, and she started the engine and this guy comes running out of the building. We jump and run and hear him calling to us..."HEY - WANNA GO TO A PARTY!?!?" LOL! Those are MY peeps!
♥ ThreadKilla!
My Favourite DListed Things!
It might seem like I'm stalking you. I'm not.
You just go on about your business:)
Devilgirl *wipes tears from laughing so much*
That whole story was so awesome!
And you killed me with "I go to my room, and my bed is un made..." as if after everything that happened that warranted a comment LOL! Too many funny bits to comment on all of them but that was great!
Loved it!
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TV-ROFLMAO! I was also fond of the clown make up as a diversion from small peen. Hee Hee
Sitting ovation DG, well done!
MK should hire you to fill in for him next time he's awol!!!
.o.o.o.o.0.0.0.O.O.O.0.0.0.o.o.o.o.
"And how fat does one have to be to get dead animals trapped on your person?" madam s
Submitted by SkyBitch on Sat, 01/03/2009 - 2:52am.
BRAVO, devilgirl!
Let me know when you write about M's arrest story. You should write a book, woman!
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Agreed. I love how the town takes the story over. That happens all the time - it's pretty funny when it's YOUR story someone's tryna embellish.
♥ ThreadKilla!
My Favourite DListed Things!
It might seem like I'm stalking you. I'm not.
You just go on about your business:)
Gosh, I feel like I have won a Pulitzer! I have been catching up on comments, and seriously, thanx folks for indulging me. I have thought about compiling my stories from my 20 yrs of living in The town the devil built......on a budget. I hate to think what you all must think of me after reading my misshaps, hope I am not expelled from Dlisted by angry posters. Angel-i, is it you that has f'd up stories like mine? Share yours, please.
My only question: does cauliflower girl look for chicks in the produce aisle, if so, where should a mango?
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I am the devil, and I am here to do the devil's work.
BRAVO, devilgirl!
Let me know when you write about M's arrest story. You should write a book, woman!
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BIGGEST COMPLIMENT EVER:
"skybitch, you are one of most disgusting posters here ever. period."
She is now a bisexual who leaves him periodically for other women.
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Haha! "other" women! Good one;p
♥ ThreadKilla!
My Favourite DListed Things!
It might seem like I'm stalking you. I'm not.
You just go on about your business:)
Hey, devilgirl - It's my fault too! And lots of others! I'm sure MK is glad you can keep us entertained while he straightens out his shit over there:)
♥ ThreadKilla!
My Favourite DListed Things!
It might seem like I'm stalking you. I'm not.
You just go on about your business:)
THE AFTERMATH------Dun dun dun!
The gf did a great initial job of cleaning up the bloody mess, but I still would find blood spots here and there for almost a year around my house.
M and his neanderthal buddy had fled the scene of the crime instantly and were not seen for close to 48hrs, at which time I had the pleasure of being the one to see them first (whoopee!)
J finally went to the hospital, about 4 hrs after the bat to the head took place, he got 30 or more staples to the head.
J initially pressed charges but dropped them. The state picked up the charges and had a warrant out for M. He apologized two years later and tried to give me money for the destruction. He is still married to cauliflower head but miserable. She is now a bisexual who leaves him periodically for other women.
M dodged the law for a good 3weeks or more, but was arrested on Labor Day. I have a good story about that day too.
Me, well I went into a state of total withdrawl from everyone. The police never bothered to contact me about the matter. However, the lovely incident did make the front page of the local paper, where the parties involved were not mentioned by name, but the residence where it took place was prominantly printed, address and all. The entire town knew whose place it was because my grandfather was a prominant business man and everyone knew where the Smith's lived.
The reason for the fight- hold on to your seats kids- J had fucked M's gf, (the pregnant chick who beat me up) a year or so before this. M had told J that one day he would pay him back. This was something I was totally unaware of until months after the bat beating. There are not a lot of people with moral character in small towns, especially this one.
M eventually went to prison for the assault. He was sentenced to 7yrs, and I think was there for 1/4 of the time. I am not certain as I had pretty much distanced myself from him after this. The one funny thing I do remember is that when I went into my house that night, I looked on the floor and there were shoes that belonged to M's strange friend who spermed my bed, and I thought Poor Mofo, he is hatin' life without shoesw, running through the woods. When He an M showed up at my house days later, his feet were literally like hamburger. He said he asked M when they were running if he could borrow his socks, M thought what a pansy, wanting socks and said no and ran off. He had no idea the dude was shoeless, he just thought he wanted extra socks for comfort.
The famous assault at the Smith house was talked about for months. Each time I heard a revised version, I had to laugh, because although the orig. story is dramatic enough, you can't imagine the liberties people took with adding their own twist. Another side note, M Blazer, he couldn't afford to replace all the windows, just the wind shield, so for who knows what reason, he took a sawzall to the roof and made it a convertible of sorts. The shocking thing was that he picked up more women in that wrecked piece of junk before his incarceration, than a normal man would in a Ferrari. Of course, consider where I am and that may explain why
My explaination to my mother as to what happened to her Roseville pottery collection- A raging raccoon had somehow gotten into the house and went mad in the den, the pottery didn't have a chance. Yes, she believed it (Hmmmmm?) dId she hear about the assault? Oh, after about a year some blabber mouth told her when she was in town for a visit. Oh my God, I wish I had been the bat to the head victim rather than listen to the yelling and guilt I was lucky to have received as a result of my stupid decision to help out a homeless ex employee/poor choice as a friend.
I knew earlier that night someone was goning to ruin my fantastic high, and I'll be damned if that isn't exactly what happened.
THE END!
Thanks Dlisters, MK, i APOLOGIZE FOR taking over your blog, but I had requests. No more stories from me for awhile. I feel guilty for taking up space. TITS, IT'S ALL YOUR FAULT. Everyone can take it out on her for this novel. Hope it entertained if not, ban me! J
Submitted by SkyBitch on Sat, 01/03/2009 - 2:41am.
***Submitted by Team Valtrex on Sat, 01/03/2009 - 2:36am.
It wasn't luck, she was asleep the 2nd time....KIDDING! She was asleep both times.
***
Wait, did we go to college together?
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umm, no, I was just there to fix the copier
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I am the devil, and I am here to do the devil's work.
***Submitted by Team Valtrex on Sat, 01/03/2009 - 2:36am.
It wasn't luck, she was asleep the 2nd time....KIDDING! She was asleep both times.
***
Wait, did we go to college together?
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BIGGEST COMPLIMENT EVER:
"skybitch, you are one of most disgusting posters here ever. period."
*peeking in to see if the next instalment has come in yet*
Sheesh, I gotta catch up!
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Submitted by angel_i on Sat, 01/03/2009 - 2:34am.
Submitted by Team Valtrex on Sat, 01/03/2009 - 2:19am.
Submitted by judysmith123 on Sat, 01/03/2009 - 2:17am.
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That story was waaaay too short, but I can beat it. I fucked this girl once. Wait, twice.
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You are so lucky!
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It wasn't luck, she was asleep the 2nd time....KIDDING! She was asleep both times.
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I am the devil, and I am here to do the devil's work.
Submitted by Team Valtrex on Sat, 01/03/2009 - 2:19am.
Submitted by judysmith123 on Sat, 01/03/2009 - 2:17am.
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That story was waaaay too short, but I can beat it. I fucked this girl once. Wait, twice.
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You are so lucky!
♥ ThreadKilla!
My Favourite DListed Things!
It might seem like I'm stalking you. I'm not.
You just go on about your business:)
Submitted by TITS on Sat, 01/03/2009 - 2:27am.
Submitted by angel_i on Sat, 01/03/2009 - 2:18am.
@TITS; I dunno - you know Galleria Mall? Dufferin Grove?
Yeah that rings a large bell. I used to sample malls until i realized they were all basically the same.
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LOL! Not the Galleria. It's like a little Portuguese village in there (used to be more Italian but they all moved). Totally stuck in the 70s - it hasn't been reno'd ever. It's GREAT. They have these tiny fashion stores where you can get some interesting AND some cool clothes for extra cheap. Everything is SO cheap there. Even the regular stuff. They still have Zellers! O yeah - some big malls still have that shit too...but their Zellers is CHEAP! LUVS it!
♥ ThreadKilla!
My Favourite DListed Things!
It might seem like I'm stalking you. I'm not.
You just go on about your business:)
Submitted by SkyBitch on Sat, 01/03/2009 - 2:25am.
*passes a round of Jager shots to all*
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that's not gonna mix well with my Sterno / Nyquil spritzer.
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I am the devil, and I am here to do the devil's work.
Submitted by angel_i on Sat, 01/03/2009 - 2:18am.
@TITS; I dunno - you know Galleria Mall? Dufferin Grove?
Yeah that rings a large bell. I used to sample malls until i realized they were all basically the same.
Loved the second stink bomb! truly insane.
Sounds like orangeville or uxbridge - man I know the kind of town you're talking about.
I hope those keystone cops payed through the snout.
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"And how fat does one have to be to get dead animals trapped on your person?" madam s
Devil - I can't believe there's MORE!!! Keep it coming.
I'm not your only fan, you've attracted quite the audience here. I've even emailed some day people so they know to come back and read this.
.o.o.o.o.0.0.0.O.O.O.0.0.0.o.o.o.o.
"And how fat does one have to be to get dead animals trapped on your person?" madam s
*passes a round of Jager shots to all*
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BIGGEST COMPLIMENT EVER:
"skybitch, you are one of most disgusting posters here ever. period."
*cyber-massages devilgirl's fingers for providing us the endless entertainment*
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BIGGEST COMPLIMENT EVER:
"skybitch, you are one of most disgusting posters here ever. period."
Submitted by judysmith123 on Sat, 01/03/2009 - 2:17am.
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That story was waaaay too short, but I can beat it. I fucked this girl once. Wait, twice.
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I am the devil, and I am here to do the devil's work.
@TITS; I dunno - you know Galleria Mall? Dufferin Grove?
@Devilgirl: You should be able to sue for wrecking your buzz alone. Hells yeah! Fuckers.
♥ ThreadKilla!
My Favourite DListed Things!
It might seem like I'm stalking you. I'm not.
You just go on about your business:)
He is so capable, and I like him very much, I have seen him on Meetwealthy. com. I also met a lot of wealthy singles and celebs here. I am so lucky.
Submitted by SkyBitch on Sat, 01/03/2009 - 1:46am.
angel_i: YES!
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LOL! Ok - here it is.
I used to call myself a little village girl from the big city. I grew up in a neighbourhood where little changes (even now when I go back - it's the same!)....
So we had this tiny mall with a tiny Mickey D's in the parking lot beside a community centre. We spent ALL our winter time there...by we, I mean the hoolums who lived across the tracks from me, my step-sister and I...
McDonald's did a very silly thing. They built a tiny basement dining area with no cameras. Sillies. We got up to all kinds of shenanigans in there and kept the ceilings and walls COVERED with spit balls. The manager was getting edgy about our seven people/one BigMac and a Coke habit and started calling us on it, all the time. One such time my friend decided to stinkbomb the place on the way out. It was a big, bad stinkbomb, dudes.
He did it as an acquaintance of ours was just coming in...this guy din't hang with us except at parties and such...so they low fived or whatever as they passed each other...
The Manager was LIVID and went after the acquaintance who was all: WTF? It smelled like this when I got here!!! (he didn't even know M did it!) And refused to leave. So the Manager called the cops.
The cops came and tried to ARREST him! Just like that! So bizarre. We were all hanging on their doorstep cuz we were too cool to be shooed away like that and saw the cops come and just played it cool. Dude inside was NOT cool! He fucking lost it.
Somehow the cops broke his arm or sprained his wrist or some shit while they were tryna haul him away. At this point they're outside and peeps are EVERYWHERE to see what's going on. The cops called backup. Some lady showed up out of nowhere - some kinda lawyer looking for witnesses to police brutality. Of course, we signed our fake names.
Backup arrives. In their haste they rear-end a Chevy out in the street, which lurches forward into an electrical pole which FALLS ON ALL THE CARS IN IT's PATH. And totally blocks the very busy road on both sides.
Dude who's getting arrested is kicking and screaming still, the cops now a little distracted by the pandemonium out in the street and calling for MORE back up.
Apparently, that pole was important cuz all the lights go out. Which would have been fine half an hour before but now it's dark. So my friend, genius that he is, throws another stinkbomb in causing the Manager to fucking lose it and start having a serious tantrum INSIDE the store. Just screaming and stomping and throwing shit now. And we're all fucking DYING laughing OMG - running here and there - tryna get all the news.
In the end: Homeboy was taken away in an ambulance, arrested, released and earned a pretty penny from the whole debacle in the long run. The Manager was taken away Britney-style in an ambulance. No one was seriously injured by the electrical pole but everything was shut down for the night and the next day. The basement was turned into a playground.
And McDonald's got itself some 24/7 Police Security. LOL! We used to go flirt with them so the guys could get in the other side and then they'd always let us in, eventually, after determing what nice girls we were! As long as we were quiet in a corner it was cool - mostly, we got banned periodically.
All for the love of a stinkbomb. (He really did love those things, like, WAY too much!)
The End!
I dunno. I just remember how crazazy that day was.
There was a time I was fucking seeing triple drunk and I picked up this girl's jacket by accident and then next thing I know I got all these little tiny rough girls all screaming in my face about a beatdown. Being drunk was always the best thing for me - I got into trouble a couple of times like that but I'd just start walking and the next thing I knew I'd be gone and safe. I wonder how I did that.
♥ ThreadKilla!
My Favourite DListed Things!
It might seem like I'm stalking you. I'm not.
You just go on about your business:)
Submitted by SkyBitch on Sat, 01/03/2009 - 2:07am.
***Submitted by TITS on Sat, 01/03/2009 - 2:05am.
What the hell is taking so long!
I hope dg and angel are typing furiously and not gone to bed.***
I have faith.
I'm anxious too! How about a TITS story? :)
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Yes, something light and bouncy! Mostly bouncy!!
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I am the devil, and I am here to do the devil's work.
Tits I am back_ is anyone with me on this tale? Hope it has been of some entertainment value. RE: This is not a fictional account of one woman's stupidity, I lived it.
So I am once again crying, on the ground with my eye swelling like Rocky in the Apollo Creed bout. "Adrienne! I yell(not really!)" I look uo and I see J's cauliflower headed wife (her hair and head really resembled a head of cauliflower) standing over me then she rejoins the junk yard dogs destroying the Blazer. Gus disappears to somewhere, I stop my waterworks, and now I am pissed, for one thing, I had nothing to do with any of this bullshit, this is my house and people are behaving like fucking ignorant savages. My gf has resumed her search for the shotgun that I am positive she will not find, I start screaming at the monkeys and they stop(well there wasn't much left of the Blazer except it still had doors, but windows, mirrors, license plates, tires, bumpers, passenger seat HISTORY. I approach J and tell him that he needs a doctor, then his moron friend suggests they go destroy my Jeep. So they run to the driveway and J's wife has picked up a shovel that was by my gardening shed and starts to my vehicle, I tell them that if MY JEEP gets so much as a scratch, the cops will be there and I will press charges for assault, tresspassing, destruction of private property. His wife starts in on how I had set this up because I was upset that j had brought her to my house. I pointed out the obvious a) I had not seen or spoken to this guy in almost a year b)hadn't they come to MY house without me even knowing they were coming. c)hadn't I come home to them already being there and having already seen M there. d)wasn't I out of the house when the assault took place and wasn't I the only one who bothered to break the fist fight up. e)wasn't I the one pleading with J to get medical attention and crying over the whole gory display and finally, WTF is wrong that none of them felt it was important to get J to the hospital. He lost, I swear it looked like 2 gallon of blood on my den floor alone and there was blood all over my hallway to the kitchen, in the bathroom, the library, the porch and my couch in den had blood from one end to the other. I told J if he had ever given a fuck about me or our friendship, he needed to go. They, in their drunken states, kept insisting that M was in a special hiding place that I had given him. When did I have the time, not to mention I was furious with him over having done this to me, in my home, and putting me in the position of knowing that if he had hit him a little to the left or in the front of his head, he could have killed someone, a friend and changed everyone's lives forever. The wife said I was an old bitch and she was going to kick my ass again ( NEVER IN MY LIFE HAD I BEEN STRUCK BY ANYONE, much less been in a chick fight. Little did I know, two weeks later 2 preggo psycho's would beat me again) but J stepped in, picked her drunken cauliflower headed ass up and carted her off to his car. She, beating on him the whole time until he smaked her upside the face (Yea!)He them tries to, get this, hug me and tell me he is sorry, I recoil and tell him that the damage to my house, and to my peace of mind is beyond a sorry. Then his idiot uncle and the retard start telling him that he should fuckin hit me! He goes to his car, the uncle following, The retard, all of about 18yrs old, starts to tell me how I should have done this and how I should have done that. I don't know what exactly came over me, other than this anger at this fool telling me, at my home, what I did wrong, before I knew it I was kicking him in the shins and ass. I stopped, horrified that I too was sinking into a hillbilly mode which would be unforgivable. He stands there then tells me to watch my back cause tonight "ain't over"- Out of the bushes Gus appears and tells me that he and my gf were looking for M. The J posse with it's veggie tale female psycho had left. I walk into my house and have no idea what to do. I just cry. Don't know how long it was b4 Gus ran in and said "you need to leave, I just got a call from my brother and he heard on the scanner(a favorite hoosier pastime is listening to the police scanner, especially on the wkends) that the police are headed this way. Terrified, gf and I dash into my jeep and head back to Chuck's (we had so much fun there earlier, why oh why did we leave). As you can well imagine Chuck already knew of the events of the evening(how on earth....) and was only too happy to spark one up and bring out the To kill ya ( that's how some of the locals pronounce tequila) I am now in shock, WTF had just gone on at my home? And why, oh why was I even involved. I returned home a few hours later, Gus holding down the fort, trying to sweep up the glass that now decorated my patio and a good portion of my yard. I walk in the den and say Fuck it, I am fucking done. The gf started to clean up the blood, I told her to leave it, I didn't give a fuck. This was all bullshit. She told me to lay down and she'd take care of the clean up. I go to my room, and my bed is un made, there is a pron in my dvd player and SPERM on my sheets. I come unglued, ranting like Joan Crawford peppered with some Peter Finch in Network( I think it was peter finch ranting in Network) I go to my kitchen, blood, doors hanging off their hinges, it looked like an angry French mob had lopped off a head in my house. Gus tells the gf that the cops showed up and questioned him as to what had happened, he played dumb and said he had just showed up to visit and found the place empty and wrecked. He said that when the cops went around and saw the Blazer and doors, broken pots and plants laying all around, they commented that J and his group weren't as innocent as they had claimed by the looks of things. They asked if he knew where M was and if I was with him, and he told them he seriously doubted I would be with M. J and his uncle told the police that they had been INVITED to my place and that they did nothing but try to get help for J. The cops asked them if they had been drinking, they said afetr they got home to releave the pain until the ambulance arrived.
Tits- Is this to your liking? Brief commercial and then.... the conclusion.
***Submitted by TITS on Sat, 01/03/2009 - 2:05am.
What the hell is taking so long!
I hope dg and angel are typing furiously and not gone to bed.***
I have faith.
I'm anxious too! How about a TITS story? :)
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BIGGEST COMPLIMENT EVER:
"skybitch, you are one of most disgusting posters here ever. period."
What the hell is taking so long!
I hope dg and angel are typing furiously and not gone to bed.
.o.o.o.o.0.0.0.O.O.O.0.0.0.o.o.o.o.
"And how fat does one have to be to get dead animals trapped on your person?" madam s
Jaeger? Can't I just mix NyQuil with my Sterno?
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I am the devil, and I am here to do the devil's work.
***Submitted by Team Valtrex on Sat, 01/03/2009 - 2:00am.
who brought the s'mores?***
Not me. I just have this Jager-On-Tap machine here.
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BIGGEST COMPLIMENT EVER:
"skybitch, you are one of most disgusting posters here ever. period."
who brought the s'mores?
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I am the devil, and I am here to do the devil's work.
Submitted by TITS on Sat, 01/03/2009 - 1:52am.
It's starting to feel like we're all sitting around a campfire telling stories
Pass the baked beans...whew!
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Submitted by TITS on Sat, 01/03/2009 - 1:52am.
and the campfire counteracts the shrinkage
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I am the devil, and I am here to do the devil's work.
Submitted by angel_i on Sat, 01/03/2009 - 1:45am.
Submitted by TITS on Sat, 01/03/2009 - 1:35am.
Angel, while we're waiting why don't you share one of yours? I've got nothing that compares.... that I could post.
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Okay!
I love this one. It's called: A Stinkbomb In McDonald's. Waddyathink? Should I tell?
*
excellent!
work in some local landmarks - make me homesick.
*dashes to kitchen to get last of seemingly endless amount of caramel corn*
.o.o.o.o.0.0.0.O.O.O.0.0.0.o.o.o.o.
"And how fat does one have to be to get dead animals trapped on your person?" madam s