Brad Beaten By A Dog!
Anybody who calls themselves a Brangaloonie should punish themselves today by going to see Marley & Me, because they have failed one of their gods! They should have been protesting outside of movie theaters with help of (SPOILER ALERT) these posters! Because they didn't do that shit Benjamin Button got his ass beat by Jennifer Aniston and her dog friend. HA! Marley & Me was the #1 movie this weekend with around $37 million. So far it has made $51 million in just 4 days. Benjamin Button came in at #3 with $27 million and a total of $39 million. Somewhere in the world Jennifer Aniston is texting Maddox with: "Suk on dat!"
I decided to go see that Benjamin Button shit on Friday, but only for Tilda Swinton. I would work the streets in a crotchless bikini made out of salami for Tilda, so I dropped $12 to support her ass. I should have left after her part and snuck into Marley & Me, because that shit was way too long. It was 3 damn hours! When my tub of popcorn ran out after the second hour, I knew I was in trouble. The story sort of reminded me of Forrest Gump. But Forrest Gump without the delicious box of chocolates! Instead of chocolate we got an old creepy baby.
What surprised me the most about this weekend's box office is the fact that Tommy Girl's big gay Nazi movie made $21 million! Not 21 dollars, 21 million dollars! The fuck?! There must be a lot of whores out there who really hate themselves. That's the only reason I can think of on why a dumb bitch would spend their money on a 2-hour torture session. Either that or there's a ton of crazy aliens lovers out there.
The weekend box office from Dec. 26th to 28th looked like this:
1. Marley & Me - $37 million
2. Bedtime Stories - $28.1 million
3. The Curious Case Of Old Baby - $27 million
4. Valkyrie - $21.5 million
5. Yes Man - $16.4 million
6. Seven Pounds - $13.4 million
7. The Tale of Despereaux - $9.4 million
8. The Day The Earth Stood Still - $7.9 million
9. The Spirit - $6.5 million
10. Doubt - $5.7 million
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Poor Charles. Someone took the chong out of his dong.
Sugaroo, I see you said 'vagina'.
I like vaginas. Only on goats, though. They're good for storing things.
Yeah, I think she's over him too, I'm sure it took her awhile, could have taken her a year maybe or so, but by now, I think she's over him. And I would be laughing at them, if I was Jennifer.
Submitted by . on Sun, 12/28/2008 - 7:24pm
Jim carrey rocks, My favorite movie of him is Eternal Sunshine, the only bad part about that movie was Kirsten Dunst or whatever her name is, and I LOVED HIM in Man on the moon, he was a bettet Kaufman than Kaufman himself (at points)of course KL ruined it.
What I want to know is why we dlisters, the snarkiest and most sarcastic of all, have allowed this to reduce itself into a JA vs AJ discussion. EWWW seriously, aren't we above that drivel?
*laughs at Sugaroo for talking to herself*
Charles Manson, if I were a married woman, would you touch my nipples?
Take that Mr. Pitt.
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* has a big reveal but won't share*
*plays connect the dots on spider vein legs*
ANGELINA IS A GODDAMN FUCKING WHORE. SHE IS AN UGLY ASSED GODDAMN BABOON LIPPED PIECE OF SHIT. I CAN'T STAND WOMEN WHO ACTIVELY GO AFTER MARRIED MEN. NO YOU FUCKING GODDAMN STUPID ASS WHORE BITCH. NO IT IS NOT RIGHT. NOT UNDER ANY FUCKING CIRCUMSTANCE. HE'S MARRIED. HE'S MADE A COMITTMENT TO SOMEONE FUCKING ELSE. DO YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS YOU STUPID ASS PIECE OF GARBAGE. OR SHOULD WE FUCKING SPELL IT OUT FOR YOU IF YOU ARE TOO FUCKING GODDAMN STUPID TO UNDERSTAND IT. YOU STUPID FUCKING BITCH.
I leave for two weeks and I come back to the smell of a Chinese food filled bong of sex! What the shit, ladies and gents?
I wonder if they will give an oscar to Shiloh Jolie-Pitt. They seem to want to give this family oscars for some reason. Why not Shiloh? It would make up for being sold cheap to the magazines.
Jennifer should be counting her lucky starts for not getting knocked up by Brad. I really in my heart think that she was done with him before he was done with her. It's only so much stupidity from a man a woman can take. She is definetly smarter than him and to be tied to a brick wall has to be stifling.
Wait another year or two and you will see Angie drifting. I hope she leaves the 6 pack on his ass too
蜘龍====================龍蜘
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KidL - If you read the interview Brad did with Fincher (if forget with who but it was a few days ago) PItt spilled the beans and said he only thought kids after meeting AJ. Yet another contradiction from the Jolie Pitt camp. Of course the loons refuse to see this and cream their pants cause those two were "sooo meant to be".
I could not agree more with them on this front as they are both egotistical pieces of trash who deep down know they are no good and really have to reinvent themselves out of self-importance and the need to feel relevant. Yeah, great for their charity. It would still get done without all the press and pics. No?
http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1172613656
Submitted by Mix Well on Sun, 12/28/2008 - 7:23pm.
sugaroo, i didn't really expect a mensa moment considering her 'posts' already.
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Are you kidding? That thing couldn't even come up with a DUH moment, it's so brainless!
Leash - I have to admit I bought it for my daughter and she loved it.
Submitted by Rosemary on Sun, 12/28/2008 - 7:20pm.
I don't think that Jen would take Brad back, she's too smart for that.
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I don't either. I wouldn't be surprised if she laughs her ass off everytime she thinks of her ex with those 6 kids. Frankly, if it were me, I would feel like I dodged a bullet.
Oh, and as far as the Brangeloonies who claim she is still not over him because she mentioned that he and his Lady Love acted like a bunch of assholes, I think she is. She's merely pointing out he's an asshole.
On-topic... My husband bought me the Marley & Me book not too long ago and I enjoyed it. I'll probably wait til the DVD comes out to see it... Can't afford the movies. Don't wanna get shot either, if I whisper or cough or something.
Candy,
UGH. Bless your heart. I'm so sorry. You are smart in protecting yourself and by doing that you are protecting your innocent babes as well. When you have a child or children [plural] it really makes you re-think things and open up your eyes in a way that only having a child can do to you.
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Yes, I'm off-topic. Boo freakin' hoo.
Here is your topic:
Jim Carrey rawks! -ANd, his new movie will be HILARIOUS as only he can provide hilarity.
Even though...I gotta say...the previews of his movies sucked. I hope his movie bettered that. :\
*decides to be a bradaloonie today a Jenaloonie tom*
*writes it down in notebook*
sugaroo, i didn't really expect a mensa moment considering her 'posts' already.
Submitted by Two Drink Min on Sun, 12/28/2008 - 7:05pm.
The loons will bitch no matter what. First it was that this movie would tank cause it was a "dog movie" and cause JA was in it. Then it superceeds Pitt's movie and now it excuse after excuse. "Pitt's movie was more dramatic",
Aniston is not the star of the film"...
I would love to know what this woman did besides marry that piece of used up leather with a perv stache to make the loons think she is the Anti-Christ.
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You're not kidding! And I'm sure if the movie "He's Just Not that into You" turns out to be a hit, they'll all use the excuse that it was an ensemble cast. If it bombs - it's Jen and her fault alone. The loonies are delusional. Dog or man aging backwards on christmas day?! It's a no brainer.
And the reason they make her out to be the anti-christ is because physically they don't think she's a winner... so let's hate her because of the chin and the nose she was born with. Shallow, Pathetic pieces of shit.
Leash, it never ends! WOOOT!
lol sugaroo
Submitted by Two Drink Min on Sun, 12/28/2008 - 7:05pm.
I would love to know what this woman did besides marry that piece of used up leather with a perv stache to make the loons think she is the Anti-Christ.
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Silly, JA refused to give the glorious Mr. Pitt the baybees he longed for! She was SO evil to do that that it is no wonder he fell for St. Angie who collects kids the way other people collect dolls. (Oh, and she gives to charity which we all know because she tells us every chance she gets.)
Never mind the fact that for most of their marriage, JA was working on a sitcom that called for her to work 12-14 hours a day for 5 days or more or week or that she may have had serious reservations about having kids with a man rumored to smoke a lot of weed and be prettty immature for his age. He wanted kids, so she should have gave them to him IMMEDIATELY!
Seriously, the Brangeloonies who think like this show an incredible lack of maturity when it comes to relationships and parenthood in general. As someone who is preggers with my first child, I have to say I applaud JA for not going into parenthood lightly or having a Band-Aid Baby in order to "save" her marriage.
@Sugaroo: And it begins again! Hahaha!
dot, thank you. holiday was fine. i don't see 'holiday movies'. they've sold the holiday.
cornmuncher, i will take that as a no, you just want attention. there was your fifteen seconds.
Submitted by Rosemary on Sun, 12/28/2008 - 7:18pm.
Oh i'll be honest and say I debated seeing Changeling. But I don't think I can do it since I have such a problem with angelina.
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I read that as "...since I have such a problem with vagina."
I swear to God I did.
I don't think that Jen would take Brad back, she's too smart for that.
Submitted by Mix Well on Sun, 12/28/2008 - 7:15pm.
cornmuncher, do you have anything useful to add or do you just want attention?
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Care to make odds on the answer to that? ;-)
Submitted by K2 on Sun, 12/28/2008 - 7:12pm.
Umm gee ok...umm I guess you told me. I think.
It also got bad reviews I think so that makes it easier for me lol
*slings poo at mix well*
dont worry about what I have to add.
MixWell,
How'd your holidays go, hon?!
Do you do the movies around this time?
Here's my Brad/Angelina prediction. Brad eventually dumps Angelina, then goes back to Jen. Then we hear a whole bunch off b.s. about true love, and how they're meant to be together, blah, blah, blah.
Angelina gets into world politics.
In other words, we're never rid of them.
Oh i'll be honest and say I debated seeing Changeling. But I don't think I can do it since I have such a problem with angelina.
I'm surprised The Earth Stood Still made it at Number Seven. That movie sucked. Listen up, save your over $10.00 per ticket money, get down to blockbuster and rent the original for less than half the price. Plus you can get free popcorn if you have a coupon.
Submitted by . on Sun, 12/28/2008 - 7:00pm.
Submitted by Candy on Sun, 12/28/2008 - 6:55pm.
DL= a gay dude pretending to be straight. I don't believe in bi-sexuality. Somebody told me he loved to pack the fudge...with men I confronted him, he denied it and I hadn't seen him in almost a year. When I did yesterday he ran.
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Ohhhhhhhh! Geez. I was misinformed! Or, does down low mean that too? I'm so sorry. Sheesh! Oh hon! ((HUG)) What a crummy thing to do to a person. :(
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The other posters before me got it right. That's really just my personal opinion about men like that since I found out. I will say that it is very important to be careful with any man you are dating and to take care of yourself on a regular basis. I'm a huge believer in condoms. I'm always stacked with drawers full but it's not 100%. Thank God I get checked up regularly. I have two children to live for and if men like to play games they need to stop and leave the women alone and face who they are.
蜘龍====================龍蜘
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(='.'=)
(")_(")
Submitted by Sugaroo on Sun, 12/28/2008 - 7:14pm
Now, that would be FUNNY... LOL
WEll let me rephrase what I meant then about the only good movie i've seen. I'm not exactly sure if Marley and me is christmasy, I know it's about a dog. But thinking of Christmas movies makes me think of Four Christmases. And so, I meant , the only good Christmasy movie I've seen in awhile was Deck the Halls. Marley and Me maybe christmasy, I don't know. But I want to see it . That's about all I want to see that's out.
cornmuncher, do you have anything useful to add or do you just want attention?
Submitted by shut the smurf up on Sun, 12/28/2008 - 7:10pm.
Submitted by Sugaroo on Sun, 12/28/2008 - 7:06pm.
Submitted by shut the smurf up on Sun, 12/28/2008 - 7:04pm
I think Brangeloonies are funny only to a certain point, when you realize these people are for real... it goes away, just think about it for a second, is actually kind of scary
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I agree with you on that one. One has to wonder what any of them would do if they actually met Brangelina. IMO, the suicide rate would go through the roof once they realized Brangelina couldn't give two flying shits about them and wouldn't pee on them if they were on fire.
nova, i think now that brad is no longer helping, but hindering her public perception, she would toss him aside in a second if it were not for the "family" that they have sold from shore to shore. in the end, angelina only thinks of 'what's good for angelina'.
I'm surprised "The Spirit" didn't do better, I've been seeing the dumb posters for that crap since I went to see Batman in July.
Submitted by Lindalou on Sun, 12/28/2008 - 7:03pm.
From what I've read, every one of the Christmas releases is mediocre.
Marley is way too many minutes of Owen Wilson chasing a dog and way to many scenes that would have even the most heartless person sobbing. Not a family movie! JA's performance isn't even mentioned.
Valkyrie glosses over the fact that Hitler was a racist pig who murdered 100s of thousands of people. Did I forget to mention TC sucks really bad in this movie. That he literally ruins this movie. Not makin this shit up!
Adam Sandler phoned in his performance in bedtime stories. He must have been under contract and had to do the movie or something
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LMAO! Aren't we filled with negativity? Maybe you should actually pay money to see ALL of these films and give us YOUR opinion. It's easy to pass along what "other" people thought of the films? geez. Say what you want, but M&M hit a record high on Christmas day - NO movie has ever done that on christmas day - not even ALI in 2001. If people wanted to see a freakin' dog, they could go to the local pound on christmas day. They didn't have to go to the theater. This was a family movie with a dog but people did go to check out Jen & Owen as well. Give credit where credit is due.
I don't think Brad and Fish Lips will last too much longer. I'll put my money down that in two years they are separated. What the hell was he thinking. Jumping right into a relationship and immediately pumping out several kids and adopting. It will be very interesting to see what kind of shared arrangement they have when they eventually split. He is going to pay out the nose for all those kids he so mindlessly and stupidly procreated and adopted.
I can't quit you babe, so I guess I got to put you down for a while--Led Zeppelin
Submitted by Sugaroo on Sun, 12/28/2008 - 7:06pm.
Submitted by shut the smurf up on Sun, 12/28/2008 - 7:04pm
I think Brangeloonies are funny only to a certain point, when you realize these people are for real... it goes away, just think about it for a second, is actually kind of scary
my my you people get very riled up over this subject don't you?why can't you just go to a movie and enjoy it for the entertainment value of it? its only a movie....
If you think the movie line-up was bad?
GUESS what was the big SELLER on Amazon.com this year?
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2008/12/26/sarah-palin-2009-calendar_n_153...
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I wanted to send that to MK but I figured he's had enough of the political rants here...
But, seriously? WHO bought that shit? It HAD to be for laughs!
Topic?: Movies give me sneevils. I need to invest in Kleenx.
lol, that's funny if they first said it would tank
*farts*