Tuesday, December 16th 2008
The CAPTION THIS Contest WINNER For December 15th!
Though they're coming out of different ends, both of these assholes sound the same. - DUDE
Runners-up:
Host: This horn bit would have been perfect for the Guys from "Pineapple Express",
but no, instead I get stuck with the Gays from "No facial express. - Vern
Seems that Hugh Jackman has learned more than just 'how to never wear a shirt' from Mathew Mcconaughey - DIXecrystal
Now I'm starting to realize why Isabella and Connor won't call her mom. - MattyClam
(Thanks Andre)
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Botox rain dance: Niki Kidman & wig maker playing song whilst a wolf man does the jig for purposes of nourishing her face with effervescing frozen glow.
-side note: Hugh is fucking hot and looks dashing in this pic.
Wetten das hell are they doing?
VERSION 2: Nicole demonstrates the "Deep Throat" meditation music that kept her husbands Tommy and Keith on the straight and narrow path for so long, while Hugh tries to integrate it into his Nohomohere yoga practice.
Nicole Kidman demonstrates the tissue numbing effects of botox breath on Hugh Jackman's foot.
The Pied Piper of Ambien
the things one must do to stay relavent in the land down under
Sorry but Jackman is not gay. He's just musical!
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Wyle E Coyote
"And I'm sure the bitch... was arrested for attack with a deadly gorgeous eyebrow.", MK.
Nicole's blown alot of things in Hollywood for plum roles, but never anything THIS big.
And here we have Nicole Kidman, demonstrating how she injects her Botox every morning.
Hugh’s standing like that and laughing 'cuz of where that end was moments ago.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Watch out where the huskies go, and don't you eat that yellow snow.
Nicole blows a high pitch that causes Hugh's RLS (restless leg syndrome) to act up.
See, if you play just the right note on this thing, it tickles his balls!
Nicole demostrates the penis charmer, which incidentally, only works on gay men.
SHES NOT ME AND SHE NEVER WILL BE!
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huh? what? Show me what you got! Rub it against my thigh!!!
And if you'll just inhale nice and deep Nicole, you'll start to feel the effects of the weed. Don't worry though, it won't make you as high as Hugh looks.
Even Jackman's "Little Tea Pot" couldn't divert attention away from Nicole's death grip on big woodie.
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Bowie and Bing
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VGelQhYY85c
*Hugh laughing hysterically*
"Now waitaminute, Nic...they told you to put THAT in your mouth, and it'll enhance your lips???"
*stops laughing*
"Yeah, they got me too...but at least I got a personal assistant out of the deal!"
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Mele Kalikimaka is Hawaii's way
To say "Merry Christmas to you."
Nicole Kidman demonstrates how she used to have sex with Tom Cruise according to the Xenu Sutra.
Nicole Kidman demonstrates on Live the only Scientology approved way to perform oral sex on Tom cruise, unfortunately Hugh heard the word cock and instinctively assumed the receiving position.
RIIIIIIIIIIIIIICOLA!!!
Traditionally, only men can play the digereedoo so Nic came the closest to qualifying.
Siegfried has Nicole and Hugh re-enact what he and Roy were doing moments before the tiger attacked.
(:P Dayum, this one is tough.)
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Watch out where the huskies go, and don't you eat that yellow snow.
The mating call of Hugh Jackman...a show tune out of a long piece of wood.
Now I'm starting to realize why Isabella and Connor won't call her mom.
Aussie's sure do love a good fart joke.
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I'm Movie Star Tom Berenger goddamnit.
As the host holds the giant phallus for Nicole to blow, Hugh spreads his ass cheeks and grins in gleeful anticipation.
It wasn't so amusing when seconds later Nicole hit the Brown Note.
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You'll be doin' all right, with your Christmas of white
But I'll have a blue, blue, blue, blue Christmas
I know there's a weird gay joke in here somewhere. I'm just wondering if Nicole's lips how she can actually blow with the amount of collagen in them.
http://ginarivera.typepad.com/ginasrant/
Showing her variety of talents, Nicole proves that she can both blow and suck simultaneously...And that, folks, is why she has an Academy Award!
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Shadow was the best doggie boy ever...10/08/08
Its all fun and games until someone gets hurt. Then, it's fucking hilarious! lol
Nic, honey, THIS one you blow INTO. I know...I know. It's confusing. Blow job ya don't blow...I know.
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Bowie and Bing
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VGelQhYY85c
When a gay hears music he hast to danthhhe!!!
Who's the guy in the middle?
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Don't surround yourself with yourself; move on back to square.
Nicole won the deep throat contest because her movies suck the most.
Hugh Jackman always assumes the position when there's wood nearby.
"Suicide hotline, please hold"
Still ain't gonna bring Heath back.
the DUDE! abides...
Thats the only way you're gonna charm that snake outta Jackmans pants Nicole, you're female, duh!
So if you're Australian, it's your mouth that gets longer when you lie about being a botox queen.
Though they're coming out of different ends, both of these assholes sound the same.
the DUDE! abides...
Lips on a phallic symbol made Hugh so nervous he danced a jig
Host: Well Nicole, at least your pipe blowing skills are better than your acting skills.
"Suicide hotline, please hold"
Australia's less popular followup to YMCA, "AI4"
There's definitely a joke in this about a large phallic instrument and Hugh Jackman's legs automatically going up and out, but I am not sure how to make it.
"I love my tail in these jeans!"
Hugh's smiling because he knows what he's taking home tonight, and no it isn't the ice queen.
"Suicide hotline, please hold"
Actors sure know how to pretend
the DUDE! abides...
Michael Flatley stole the "good" name so Hugh Jackman is stuck with Lord of the Flamers.
****
Bother me tomorrow, today I'll buy no sorrows, do do do, lookin' out my backdoor
Hugh is so sweet. Realizing what a selfish cunt Tommy Girl must have been, he lets Nicole play with the new toy first.
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It's creamie, not prune!!!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hQbwt-dicpo
The Aussie version of Stupid Human Tricks.
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You'll be doin' all right, with your Christmas of white
But I'll have a blue, blue, blue, blue Christmas
Submitted by starvis on Mon, 12/15/2008 - 3:06pm.
This is a Digery-Don't
*
aw fuck.
i tried to be as quick as i could!!!
Submitted by Jeffro11 on Mon, 12/15/2008 - 3:09pm.
Hugh is thinking..."ROOKIE!"
good one Jeffro! LOL
****************************1/20/09
"This is MK. He started it" angel_i
Didgeridon't.
Nicole's next surgery is adding an elephant's trunk.
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pussy don't fail me now, I gotta turn this n****a out, so he don't want nobody else, but me and only me....
- Missy Elliott