Tuesday, December 16th 2008
The CAPTION THIS Contest WINNER For December 15th!
Though they're coming out of different ends, both of these assholes sound the same. - DUDE
Runners-up:
Host: This horn bit would have been perfect for the Guys from "Pineapple Express",
but no, instead I get stuck with the Gays from "No facial express. - Vern
Seems that Hugh Jackman has learned more than just 'how to never wear a shirt' from Mathew Mcconaughey - DIXecrystal
Now I'm starting to realize why Isabella and Connor won't call her mom. - MattyClam
(Thanks Andre)
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Yes Darling, you put this end in your mouth,, see. Look how his pant leg rises
Then Hugh danced around and exlaimed, "Oh My God! There's nothing better than a huge pipe from the bush, Down Under."
"Well blow my horn and call me Captain!"
Poor thing, this has to remind Nicole of her wedding night to Tom Cruise!
Gives blowing the shofar* a whole new meaning.
*done on Rosh Hashannah
BAZ LUHRMANN'S epic Australia and its star Nicole Kidman have angered Aboriginal groups after the actress tried to play a didgeridoo on a German television show at the weekend.
The light-hearted stunt flouted Aboriginal custom in many parts of Australia, where women are forbidden to play the instrument.
Kidman blew feebly into a didgeridoo during a promotional appearance on Wetten, Dass …? [Bet It...?], a high-rating German program known for its high jinks. [The host is Thos. Gottschalk.]
Allen Madden, cultural and educational officer at Sydney's Metropolitan Local Aboriginal Land Council, said Kidman ought to know better. "I presume she doesn't know, otherwise she wouldn't be playing it. But [I would have thought] the women on that set would have told her. Baz should know something about it, after working with those traditional fellas on the film."
http://www.brisbanetimes.com.au/news/entertainment/kidman-in-the-didgeri...
Submitted by Sandbitch on Mon, 12/15/2008 - 5:09pm.
I like your avvie :)
Version 1: Nicole demonstrates the "Deep Throat" meditation music that kept her husband Tommy on the straight and narrow path for so long, while Hugh tries to integrate it into his Nohomohere yoga practice.
"Oh, stop it, Nicole. Stop! Can't you see your Tommy-kazoo is making Hugh antsy in the pantsy!"
Jackman tries to kick his own hot ass for starring in a film with botox kidman!
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Jesus loves you the rest of the planet thinks you're a cunt!
Australia is weird.
Submitted by snowpiece on Mon, 12/15/2008 - 4:53pm.
that dude is some Aussie chat show host, I remember the dlisters from downunder telling us about him before....
===Nope, he ain't an Aussie. It's some german show/dude. There isn't a chat show host in Australia that could convince/pay Kidman to blow into a didgeridoo on Aussie TV.
Who knew Nicole Kidman was a snake charmer?
During Nicole's biggest botox injection to date, the doctor accidentally stabs Hugh in the balls...
that dude is some Aussie chat show host, I remember the dlisters from downunder telling us about him before....
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"This is MK. He started it" angel_i
Hand it over, Nicole. You know Hugh prefers a man's lips on his Didjeridu.
Yes, you're People's Sexiest Man Alive, you live on the beach and you dance to that weird instrument, but you're no Matthew McConaughey!
Getting off on the wrong foot.
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"Im totally cereal!"
"The Tom Cruise Story." starring Hugh Jackman as reaches back to his broadway experiences to play Tom Cruise and Nicole Kidman reprises her role from the Stepford wife as Katie Holmes.
Hugh finally finds out who taught Tom how to "blow" on an instrument so well. Nicole got a lovely fruit basket (pun intended) from Jackman after the show to say thanks.
Hugh Jackman even makes the Ice Queen horny.
(I know! I know!! But he's still hot lol.)
Blow jobs Australian style!!
Nic shows how TommyGirl taught her to stimulate a man.
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My avatar is my 27-pound Maine Coon furkid named Mozart. Lying next to him is a standard-sized cat.
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Thanks Missy, and Sheeps.....Hugh isn't gay!!! *sticks fingers back into ears* I can't hear you.
With Hugh Jackman assuming the female position, Nicole went on to demonstrate how Sunday Rose was actually conceived.
Submitted by Sluttsville on Mon, 12/15/2008 - 4:09pm.
damn slutty! you is like a CT proff-esh-unal funny lady! hahahahaa!!
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Fuck 'Em If They Can't Take A Joke
a message from the Church of the SubGenius
Although she has officially given up practicing Scientology, Nicole Kidman likes to break out the old E-Meter at parties every once in a while just for shits and giggles.
Crapface is the new Crapface
Submitted by Sluttsville on Mon, 12/15/2008 - 4:09pm.
Hugh Jackman not only has a little Captain Morgan in him, but 30 minutes earlier he also had a little Navy seaman in him.
Hey! I thought you dint want to hear about Huge engaged in any gay bizness.... It's OK when it's a joke?
You really gotta try a rip of this stuff! Look how high Jack is getting... almost off the ground.
Hugh Jackman not only has a little Captain Morgan in him, but 30 minutes earlier he also had a little Navy seaman in him.
Nicole blows into her "Homo Finder" and she catches another one!
Nicole plays the gaydareedoo so well!!
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All we are....is dust in the wind, dude.
-Ted "Theodore" Logan
There's something wrong in this picture.
Is Jackman squeezing out a musical toot?
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Don't surround yourself with yourself; move on back to square.
rockylife, you mean the blond guy :D??? he doesnt look like hugh hefner at all to me ^^
Nichole: "Oh Hugh, stand on one foot and close your eyes, you're making me horney baby."
Nicole was shocked to see Hugh Jackman react to the virgin horn. It was even more obvious it wouldn't work on Hugh Hefner.*
* check the picture, it's a young Hefner.
Wow. That's odd. When did Carson Kressley grow out his hair?
Silly Nicole, when Hugh said he was an expert in blowing long pipes, this isn't what he meant.
Where is Spaghetti Cat when you need him?
Anything involving Botox Face Nicole Kidman is a didgereeDON'T!
"Elizabeth, how does one suck a fuck?"
Nicole discovers she is the worlds first and only Wolverine charmer.
Seems that Hugh Jackman has learned more than just 'how to never wear a shirt' from Mathew Mcconaughey
This is how they make it big in Australia.
"Ha! No wonder Tommy left you. Pass that over here; I'll show how to work it while standing on one leg."
I wondered why Nitty suddenly took up didgeridoo lessons. She's trying to call Huge to her.
So THAT's how you give enimas?!
didgeridouche!
You can didgeridoo me in the morning.
You can didgeridoo me in the night.
You can didgeridoo me when you wanna didgeridoo me.
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MK thinks my baby is cute.
seems like ur obsessed with germany Ôo sometimes