Bronx Mowgli Looks Like His Mommy
Pete Wentz wrote on his blog yesterday that BMw Baby is "cute" and "looks like his mommy." Um. Which version of his mommy? There's been a few. The bitch has been through more redesigns than the fucking Nissan Sentra. And I guess by "looks like his mommy," he means the baby is one gigantic chin with little arms and legs and a severe acid reflux problem. My suspicious have been confirmed!
Pete also responded to the rumors that nobody wants to buy pictures of their baby.
About baby pics gossip: truth is like every celeb couple we were offered
mounds and mounds of money by mags from here to Guam to pimp out the baby. We just don’t want to go down that road with him.We are not placing judgment on those that do as they often use the money in a very charitable way. However, we have made the decision to not sell Bronx’s baby pictures right now. We understand that like other celebrities have said, “there is a bounty on our heads” for these pictures. There is a danger when there are cameras being held over walls and into our backyard. We are followed day and night and that was fine when it was us but we are going to do our best to shelter Bronx from that as much as possible. Its scary to be followed by 10 cars to your home. We understand the curiosity, just not the viciousness that comes along with it when it becomes so insatiable. We know there will be a time when we’ll share him with everyone because that insatiable curiousity becomes unsafe or simply because we’re proud parents who want to show him off! We know our fans support and care about us and want to know about our family and we’ve always been straight up and open with those who care about us most, so at some time, when it makes sense, Bronx will be out in the world.
They have an OK! Magazine in Guam? Pete and Ashlee really are better than Brangelina by keeping their baby to themselves and not selling out for quick cash. That would be really honorable if it was true. Chinocchio needs to stop his lie-telling before his chin gets so big that he'll have to start claiming it on his taxes. There's no way Papa Joe would ever turn down mounds of cash. He wouldn't even turn down a Mounds candy bar for the pics!!!
Real talk: they weren't offered shit, so they decided to wait until after Bronx Mowgli's plastic surgery makeover before they try to hit up the magazines again.
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by the way this mutant probably looks, you two cunts can keep him all to yourselves.
thank god they had a boy...it would be 50 times as hard for a little girl to have been born w/Ashlee Simpson's ORIGINAL pre-plastic surgery face; big ugly nose and huge chin, no eye lift and arched eyebrows, and thin un-botoxed lips that now look like fish lips. A. Simpson is still f'n fug, just not as fug.
You know, they would have got a bit more respect if they hadn't of touched the rumor at all. But him going out and making a stink about it by saying he was offered "mounds and mounds" of cash is ridiculous. Celebrites are so pathetic. They are like little kids..."nu uh! we got offered money too!" GROW UP. Name your kid a regular fuckin name. Or at least one where he wont be the laughing stock for life.
Again GROW up! Hate these two assclowns.
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Gerard, Jude, Robert Pattinson. Rowr.
Your heart is my pinata
<"We know there will be a time when we’ll share him with everyone because that insatiable curiousity becomes unsafe or simply because we’re proud parents who want to show him off!">
This is a hip rocker?
Between the name, the chin, the nose and Pete's fug mouf - this kid has no hope.
She was ugly before and is ugly now.Give it up Wentz no one is buying it.
Between two evils, I always pick the one I never tried before.
http://www.myspace.com/384080529
I do like her hair color in the after pic, though.
Well if the baby looks like she used to, they should never have expected it to fetch any covers! If she wanted to go the baby-whoring route she should have used a sperm donor... well, and an egg donor too.
Submitted by KA on Fri, 12/12/2008 - 4:03pm.
She looked cuter before the surgery. Trust - I've seen her up close and personal several times. Her plastic surgery came in the "dead behind the eyes" package.
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I've heard that this is part of the losing weight 'healthy' way package too, right?
No blow or other appetite suppressants involved, yes?
She looked cuter before the surgery. Trust - I've seen her up close and personal several times. Her plastic surgery came in the "dead behind the eyes" package.
That poor ugly kid. :(
Submitted by parissucksliterally on Fri, 12/12/2008 - 2:44pm.
I used to get headaches all the time, then found out I was grinding my teeth in my sleep.
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Ugh, my daughter began the teeth grinding in her sleep a few months ago, the sound drives me crazy.
OMG PSL you have TMJ too? It's the bane of my existance!!!!
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"This is MK. He started it" angel_i
Submitted by El Bastardo on Fri, 12/12/2008 - 2:36pm.
She was kinda cute in before. Now, same-o same-o same-o plastic celeb. I would do her sis though, oh yes, no mistake!
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You're right, El Bastardo.
At least Chestica has some interesting fun bags~
Ashley should of named her kid Irvine, Temecula, or Anaheim.
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KD and Mrs Gosling,, I used to get headaches all the time, then found out I was grinding my teeth in my sleep. I got a night guard, and hardly get headaches anymore.....just something to look in to....
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And though you don't believe that they do, They do come true; for did my dreams, come true when I looked at you
And maybe too, if you would believe, you too might be, overjoyed, over loved, over me
Submitted by Mrs. Gosling on Fri, 12/12/2008 - 2:37pm.
Submitted by KD on Fri, 12/12/2008 - 12:27pm.
Oh, and that nose isn't really that much of an improvement.
Dang, I think I need a vacation. I get a headache almost every day.
Me too!!! i was just thinking that today..I keep thinking something is really wrong with me because these headaches are there all the time
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I get them from just being so uptight from stress. It's a tension headache. It's kind of funny because I am stressed because there is nothing to stress out about. If i'm not busy, I'm stressed. I just need more to do.
Submitted by KD on Fri, 12/12/2008 - 12:27pm.
Oh, and that nose isn't really that much of an improvement.
Dang, I think I need a vacation. I get a headache almost every day.
Me too!!! i was just thinking that today..I keep thinking something is really wrong with me because these headaches are there all the time
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Happy Holidays
She was kinda cute in before. Now, same-o same-o same-o plastic celeb. I would do her sis though, oh yes, no mistake!
HOKY FUCKING SHIT dude, too fucking much, wouldn't know where to
start dissecting the funny you bring.
and a song about Asshole Chinzilla Simpson:
Somebody's wat-CHIN; maybe you want 'em to see you
But with your regrets and secrets you
don't really want them to be you
Well you can make believe I'm blind
And for now I'll be just fine
But when the child grows up to have more than just your eyes
Don't be surprised
Don't be surpriiiiiiiiiised!
Don't be surpriiiiiiiiiised!
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"Everything die-diddly-dies, and that's a factoroonie!"
"The bitch has been through more redesigns than the fucking Nissan Sentra."
Coffee... shooting out nose. Too funny.
She looks too damn plastic.
Yeah, it's an upgrade, but after all this work done, her face has also lost its character, so what's the point?
And lmao @ her deluded man. Right, I'll believe that sh*t like I was born yesterday.
HELLO ASSLEE// IM FROM DA BRONX,
I WANT MY NAME BACK BITCH!!
LOL!
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Pretty looks fade...dumb is forever -- Judge Judy
If the mags really had offered mounds of money, PapaJoe would have locked Wentz in the basement and pimped out family Xmas pix of Bronx, Asslee, and Chestica already.
Since he hasn't, there aint no $$$$$$.
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My avatar is my 27-pound Maine Coon furkid named Mozart. Lying next to him is a standard-sized cat.
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Hysterical madness.
You'll love my blog!
http://muchbetterthanworking.blogspot.com
*Right now* key words
Man, she's had a lot of work done - skin peels, botox, eyes - but the nose looks way better, agreed.
Morbid. My dog's name is Morbid.
Submitted by snowpiece on Fri, 12/12/2008 - 11:44am.
da Bronx called
It wants it's fucking name back
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haha snow, I was reading some other blog about the name and they pointed out the total irrlevancy of the name Bronx - Ash-hole and PeePete hail from upper middle class suburbs in Texas and Pennsylvania (I think PA) respectively, yet they decide to name their baby after one of the toughest burroughs of NY. RIIIIIIIIGHT!
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Fuck 'Em If They Can't Take A Joke
a message from the Church of the SubGenius
I think Asslee's nose job was the smartest move. She is so pretty now.
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And though you don't believe that they do, They do come true; for did my dreams, come true when I looked at you
And maybe too, if you would believe, you too might be, overjoyed, over loved, over me
Oh, and that nose isn't really that much of an improvement.
Dang, I think I need a vacation. I get a headache almost every day.
Mounds of monopoly money? Yahzee chips? Chuck E. Cheese tokens?
Maybe they were offered money and since they turned it down, the mags turned it around to make them look like losers. ...NAH!
I was behind Ashlee in line at Tower Records in Sherman Oaks about 5 years ago. (I think her MTV show had just started?) She was shopping with a girlfriend; some girls recognized her, so they asked for pix together. From like 6' away, I thought she looked fine: not stunning or even pretty, but perfectly fine as she was.
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Je t'aime... Moi non plus
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sHiMDB19Dyc
MR & MRS CHINNY
12A CUNT PLACE
1 CUNT STREET
CUNT CENTRAL
CUNT COUNTY
CUNT 9021CUNT-0
The reek of CUNTY desperation to stay relevant is so overwhelming from you two CUNTS it literally has me reaching for my smelling salts. If I should fall over and bash my CUNT head on the CUNTING floor, I'm getting a CUNT lawyer to sue you CUNTS for massive amounts of your CUNT cash.
Furthermore, please rename the poor child that came out of the CUNT of the CUNT with the chin... the eyeliner... shit.. the one who was tricked by her CUNT surgeon into handing over large wads CUNT cash to chisel away at the sub-continent also known as the area below the lower lip. Cease and desist in all future CUNT activities IMMEDIATELY. Being the biggest CUNTS outside of CUNTSVILLE is not the way to go... ya CUNTS!
Ta!
--thanks awfully--
O yeah - I believe that. Fersure. Whatever you say.
PS. I am SO sure he can even remember what Bronx's Mommy looks like too.
♥ ThreadKilla!
Wow. Are you guys all on the same team?!
I Know Your Girlfriend Hates Me
Here's the thing. I think producers have stopped taking calls from Poppa Joe, and rightly so.
What a steaming pile of emo shit.
What they found out was, like signing your fetus up for the best pre-school money can buy, you need to start dealing when the stick turns blue.
That's how Brangelina rolls.
They call People, St. Skeletina tells them she is getting IVF and then sends the EPT test and then sonograms.
Then while pregnant she tells them she is going to some remote third world place and is flying herself there, they send a team of paps.
See Emotards, that's how it's done.
"Going gray is like ejaculating. You know it can happen prematurely, but when it actually does, it's a total shock." MAH BOO!!!
she looked better before the surgery.
"Like every other celebrity couple..... " Is that moron delusional or just emo-stupido?
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Live your life in such a way that when your feet hit the floor in the morning, Satan shudders and says, 'Oh, shit! She's awake'
oh yeah.. no doubt there is plastic surgery in BMW's future. Poor kid prolly inherited the Simpson beak and Wentz emo ape face.
To you as well, Farah!!!
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"Merry Christmas, Dammit!"
omg she has changed.
still hideous though.
she looks like Brittany Murphy in the 2nd pic.
but uglier.
sure sure.
ashlee is more famous for being famous than for being a singer.
she is NOT talented.
Ok, from all the Sentra drivers, FUCK YOOO!!! lol
oh please, no one cares about your baby with the stupid name Pete. Like you haven't tried to sell the pics.... *rolls eyes*
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you're everywhere to me, and when I close my eyes it's you I see
-Michelle Branch
Submitted by weenielover on Fri, 12/12/2008 - 12:01pm
that avie is the AWESOMENESS! i still have that tape!
Merry Xmas, dammit!
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I'm in no hurry, you go run and tell your friends i'm losing touch...
Pete neglected to say that baby Bronx started crying when he meant to burp but the baby track was still playing burp, so he did the jig of shame and fled the room, which is why there are no pictures. Illegal lie-telling!
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"Things are fucked up at the North Pole. Mrs. Claus caught me fucking her sister, now I'm out on my ass."
According to Emo-P: "We know our fans support and care about us"
These two douches and their evil offspring have fans? Who? What species?
"Rhoda, we're all aware that you're an adroit liar"
Sad, shallow, non relevant humans. Nose, chin, lip and eye surgery before you are even 25.
Not to mention how CREEPY it is that selling baby pictures has now become a CONTEST in Hollywood.
The bitch has been through more redesigns than the fucking Nissan Sentra.
OMG MK, that is GOLD!!!!!!!!!!! BWAHAHAHAHHAHA!
The bitch has been through more redesigns than the fucking Nissan Sentra.. BWAAAAHAAAAA..
DOLLYFACE, that's the cutest puss i've ever seen! yours?
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Never fight a Drag Queen. She might look feminine and fragile, but she will kick you ass, she's a he! -J
Funny he has to blog about it, it obviously bothers him. Leave it alone, we know the truth
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Drink up! It's Xmas!