Blind Items: I Guess....You Guess....
This performer is going to take some time off from work next year, claiming that the time is right for her to start a family. She says that she is very excited about having a baby and that it will a brand new experience for her. Well, that just isn’t true. Few outside her family knows that she already has a child. She got pregnant and gave birth when she was a teenager. Because it was thought that having a child would ruin her image and career, the baby was very quietly passed off to a relative to raise as their own. The child has no idea that the celeb is actually their mother, and the celebrity and her family are determined to keep it that way. (Blind Gossip)
Miss Jackson if you're nasty?!
Which hot young (underage) Hollywood up-and-comer is being supplied birth control
by her parents? This was only after a recent "scare" occurred. (Socialite Life)
They all need to be put on birth control! Actually, fix 'em all! But my guess is Little Jenny? She's trouble!
Which TV actor secretly gets very friendly with the same sex, despite a slew of female exes? (Gatecrasher)
There's not much to work with here. Spaghetti Cat?!
This A list actor on a very hit network comedy show has been telling anyone who will listen about all the holiday giving he has been doing and how he has adopted several families in the LA area to give them a Christmas since they cannot afford one on their own. He talks about how he has been buying gifts and is going to be bringing the a holiday meal and it goes on and on and on. He isn't doing anything like that at all. He just likes that it makes him looks good. When his publicist found about the ruse, she decided to find an actual family and make good on at least some of the crap her client was spinning. When she approached the client about visiting the family she found, he declined saying he didn't have the time but autographed a couple of DVD's from his television show for them instead. (CDAN)
Spaghetti Cat again! Or Charlie Sheen? Denise Richards better dig shit up!
This celebrity wants everyone to know everything about how perfect her life is, and how you can be just like her. We know she is currently lying about two things. The first lie she tells is about food. She says that she grocery shops and spends time in the kitchen cooking every meal for herself and her family. So not true. A quote from a recent member of her household staff : “She wouldn’t know where anything was kept in the kitchen unless it fell off the shelf and hit her in the head.” The second lie she tells is about her marriage. It’s not happy. It’s over. Expect them to remain a pretend couple while the attorneys hammer out a divorce agreement. The offiical split will happen early next year. (Blind Gossip)
One word: GOOP
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#5 is definitely Gwyneth "Fishsticks" Paltrow. She did that cooking show with Mario Bitali even though she knows nothing about food except that it's good to eat then throw up when the cameras aren't looking!
I haven't seen her with her husband in ages. They are always in different countries. I never understood that marriage. I guess Fishsticks wanted to have children and took any famous, rich guy who was willing to marry her.
I remember hearing that Janet Jackson rumor years & years ago, so I'm sticking with her.
And I could've lived my entire life without seeing that GOOP site. Gross.
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Don't let anyone tell you you're not humpable,
Because you're bumpable. Well I hope this doesn't make you feel uncomfortable
Please let #5 be Ripa. Even when I was Baby Cheese I never could stomach a phony.
No. 5 is definitely Fishsticks
Impertinent Vixen:
Thanks. Whoever it is, is a complete tool. At least their publicist seems to have some kind of morals (also rare in H'wood).
#1 Could be Mariah...she and Nick keep talking about starting a fam.
#2 That whore Miley.
#3 David Spade. I always thought he was batting for the other team.
#4 Not much to go on there. And to whoever ^^ guessed Charlie Sheen? LMAO. The only thing he gives is diseases.
#5 OMG, this is SOOOOOOOOO Eva LongWHORIA Porker. I love how she talks ad nauseum about cooking for that idiot who married her and their families...and then you see a pic of her with cans of HORMEL CHILI in her grocery cart! Fucking fraud. See it here:
http://www.hollywoodrag.com/index.php?/gallery3/image_full2/14988/
#4 - Steve Carrell (don't think Piven is A-list)
#5 - Kelly Ripa (one of those tabloids has her on the cover this week saying her marriage is on the rocks)
Hello, hockey fan. The blind item is about an asshole who claims to be helping the needy, not actually helping the needy.
And to those who guessed Alec Baldwin; he films and lives in NYC, not LA.
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"Things are fucked up at the North Pole. Mrs. Claus caught me fucking her sister, now I'm out on my ass."
Piven for 4.... (or 3?)
What
#5 is totally Kelly Ripa. No bitch that skinny knows her way around a sammich let alone a kitchen. I call bullshit.
"There is no fuckin' ice cream in your fuckin' future."
That picture was the top secret. LOL
Live NYC shows on RealityBedroom
www.realitybedroom.com
Ooooh, Eva Longwhoria is a good option. She'd have us believe that she is the uber-perfect marriage and that she actually (snicker) cooks. And she's a self-centered moron and he's a much-younger slut... so it's inevitable.
#5 is definately eva longoria. she's been crapping on and on lately about how she loves to cook for her whole family.
I heard the Janet rumor about 8 years ago. I guess she has a daughter that is probably 22 now. Janet apparently had her in January of 1987. Not sure if its true, but I wouldn't doubt it. Oh, and the last one is DEFINITELY Gwyneth Paltrow...I can see that she probably runs Chris Martin's ass around. I would divorce her too.
I was perfectly happy just disliking Fishsticks for her condescending tone and strange, affected way of speaking, her pretension and self-grandisement in interviews but, no, you people had to introduce me to goop. W.T.F.?! I thought she was a vegan turned lacto-ovo vegetarian. I am going to pretend I never saw that.
I've actually heard she is really nice from a number of people. I don't know why her image is so lame...but it is. Sorry Goopy!
I can't see Rachael Ray for #4. She doesn't try and act perfect, if anything she fucks up all the time and then tries to cute her way out of it, with her dumb phrases and grating giggle. Bitch you're 40, grow up! and buy some tits.
but I digress.. Someone who tries to project perfection, and suggests that you can have it all just like she does... Paltrow doesn't suggest that anyone can be like her.
Kelly Ripa though, she's trying to look perfect, and those commercials make her look like mother of the year, she's someone who'd really benefit from projecting success. She has my vote.
so...
1. Janet Jackson
2. Miley Cyrus (come on!)
3. Bill Cosby
4. Alec "Sorry you heard me call my 11 year old a pig!" Baldwin.. still trying to get out of the doghouse for that one.. he should be committed.
5. Kelly Ripa
i think #3 might be zach braff...he does have a lot of exes, and he's totally a closet gay...
...so i drank one/it became four/and when i fell on the floor/i drank more..
My guesses...
#1. Bea Arthur
#2. Zac Efron (and I wouldn't even know who this twink was, except for MK)
#3. Gary Coleman
#4. I have no frickin' clue.
#5. See above
My guesses:1.Janet Jackson. 2.Miley Cyrus, 3.Chase Crawford 4.Alec Baldwin 4. Either Jennifer Garner(she's been on Martha Stewart)..or Gyneth Paltrow
Number one is Jackson, and this is really old news (I think the kid's father is her first husband, the guy from the DeBarge family). Number 2 could be anyone; number 3 is probably Charlie Sheen (that guy has many screws still loose) and number 4 is undoubtedly that gigantic fraud Rachael Ray.
Submitted by Hekki on Wed, 12/10/2008 - 10:41pm.
Submitted by Tigerlilly: "She's Martha Stewart for the working class/unwashed masses that Gwennie would be horrified to be associated with in any way, shape or form. Trust, it RR."
You make an excellent point. Most excellent.
Who would my lifestyle guru be? I feel inferior to Gwyneth and Martha, but superior to Rachael Ray. Sadly, I must forge my own lifestyle.
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My lifestyle guru is MK...
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Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...
Submitted by Tigerlilly: "She's Martha Stewart for the working class/unwashed masses that Gwennie would be horrified to be associated with in any way, shape or form. Trust, it RR."
You make an excellent point. Most excellent.
Who would my lifestyle guru be? I feel inferior to Gwyneth and Martha, but superior to Rachael Ray. Sadly, I must forge my own lifestyle.
-Janet Jackson
-Jenny (teen hot mess)
-Matthew Perry Closet friend of Dorthy
-Alec Baldwin playing the good guy
-Kelly (commercial kitchen) Ripa
Submitted by louise_brooks on Wed, 12/10/2008 - 10:14pm.
Submitted by Tigerlilly on Wed, 12/10/2008 - 7:00pm.
I agree with #4 being Rachael Ray. Even though she doesn't have kids, she's always harping on and on about cooking for her in-laws and her Mom in addition to going grocery shopping and cooking every single night for her creepy husband (who's into kinky masochistic shit with sex hookers).
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Are there non-sex hookers? LOLOLOL
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hehehe...the 'sex hooker' thing is one of the few gems our 'dating site' spammers supplied us DListers with....'sex hooker'...That is AWESOME!
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Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...
Submitted by Hekki on Wed, 12/10/2008 - 10:14pm.
Submitted by idiots drive me loco: "went to goop... Not to mention, encouraging new moms not to look frumpy and rock a tank top and leggins ::eyeroll:: For most women that have jobs, and do not have the luxury of a trainer, chef, etc, the days of tanks with leggins might take a while..."
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That's why I don't think it's Fishy. Even if she did scream from a mountain top "YOU COMMON WHORES CAN BE LIKE ME" which she would rather eat a pound of straight up lard than do, us commoners wouldn't buy it, but Rachael Ray's chunky ass? As I said before she built an inexplicable career out of it AND a true Oprah empire out of it...She's Martha Stewart for the working class/unwashed masses that Gwennie would be horrified to be associated with in any way, shape or form. Trust, it RR.
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Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...
Submitted by Tigerlilly on Wed, 12/10/2008 - 7:00pm.
I agree with #4 being Rachael Ray. Even though she doesn't have kids, she's always harping on and on about cooking for her in-laws and her Mom in addition to going grocery shopping and cooking every single night for her creepy husband (who's into kinky masochistic shit with sex hookers).
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Are there non-sex hookers? LOLOLOL
Submitted by idiots drive me loco: "went to goop... Not to mention, encouraging new moms not to look frumpy and rock a tank top and leggins ::eyeroll:: For most women that have jobs, and do not have the luxury of a trainer, chef, etc, the days of tanks with leggins might take a while..."
Thank you. I get jealous as fuck of these women who work out and have coffee with their friends all day. I'm only working three days a week and I am pressed like hell trying to shop and cook and clean and do laundry. Can you imagine having all day free and having a cleaning lady and nanny on top of that?
Maybe someone's mentioned this, but isn't #1 the plot of a Lifetime movie with Brandy and Diana Ross?
Yeah, last one's gotta be Fishsticks. She makes this annoying as fuck comment on her website like "My life is good because I am not passive about it." And I'm sure being born into a wealthy Hollywood family didn't hurt, squid brains!!
But, I have a fishy confession: I tried several of her holiday side dishes for Thanksgiving ...
***hangs head, breaks into a sweat***
.... and it was pretty damn good!! And no, cold fish n' chips were not on the menu!
I think the gossip guy Ted Casablanca first called paltrow "Fishsticks" because he found her a cold, pretentious bore.. a cold fish... aka fishsticks.
Kinda suits her, doncha think?
Last one - Kelly Ripa & Mr Kelly Ripa
Submitted by iHeartHaters on Wed, 12/10/2008 - 6:05pm.
jiggy~you forgot to mention hor, horz, slut.
@ HeartHaters--
True doze. And that hot slut kd also coined my new fave pet name "ballbag."
That effing rocks.
Kisses to all of us DL ballbags, yo!
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What is the meaning of this?! He looks like a lezzie memaw who just finished eating a whole lemon without her dentures on. HIS FACE! --MK
rachel ray supposedly can't have kids, and thank god for that!
Little J from GG is CLEARLY number 2. Lady is messed up from head to toe, she needs a fixin. Skinny skinny skinny, dating older guys, getting into clubs without the need for a fake id? LUCKY BITCH
guerrillaal.blogspot.com
Oops I meant #5 is Rachael Ray in my previous post. I don't think it's Fishy cuz I can't imagine Fishy wanting to even imagine the unwashed public could be anything like her, but Rachael Ray built a career out of it. Also, it says "celebrity", not actress. I don't know how well known Fishy is for claiming to cook for her family, but RR never shuts her trap about it. Plus, if Fishy wanted to cook, she'd have plenty of time. That bitch hasn't worked in forever, but RR's chunky ass has about 100 projects going at once. Fishy's marriage is in the crapper, but RR's marriage is in the sewer. It's totally her.
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Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...
The last one has to be Fishy.
Shes been looking all kinds of weepy lately and seems to be spending a lot of time away from that ugly hubby of hers.
Some people call it a Kaiser Blade, I call it a Sling Blade.
Submitted by The Bitch on Wed, 12/10/2008 - 7:41pm.
The last one could be Fishy, BUT does she actually claim that she cooks on that stupid GOOP site of hers?!
I can't be bothered to actually go there and read it, it's too much of a fakery that I can take, so please tell me, people!
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From the website...
"I also love the cooking – the days of planning and chopping and basting."
What she fails to mention is that she's referring to her husband's peen. :)
The last one could be Fishy, BUT does she actually claim that she cooks on that stupid GOOP site of hers?!
I can't be bothered to actually go there and read it, it's too much of a fakery that I can take, so please tell me, people!
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"I am a legend, get these people out. I want to take drugs."
Submitted by Dallas on Wed, 12/10/2008 - 5:28pm.
Here's a little something to get you started.
http://www.thefrisky.com/post/246-dicktionary-a-guide-to-the-lingo-of-mi...
You're getting good at this. Practice makes perfect!
Number 1 is most definitely Janet Jackson. Her child is about 21. The others I'm not so sure about, except I think the last one is Kelly Ripa.
Welcome Dallas, you hwore!
The BIs:
#1: Totally Janet. I read about her having a secret child a decade ago at least.
#2: Could be anyone but I'm going to say Miley, just because it would go against all those Southern Christian values.
#3: I would love this closeted gay to be Piven, he's an asshole.
#4: Has to be someone who films in the LA area; CHARLIE SHEEN. Steve Carell is too down to earth for that kind of bullshit.
That GOOP website is a farce. Like anybody cares what Fishsticks has to say about anyhing. I totally believe it's her for #5. Gaudy Outlandish Overbearing Pretentions!
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"Things are fucked up at the North Pole. Mrs. Claus caught me fucking her sister, now I'm out on my ass."
OOPSSS, I MEAN:
1. Jessica Simpson
2. All them HOS
3. no clue...I'll think about it
4. ALEC BALDWIN
5. Gwen Paltrow
"Suicide hotline, please hold"
1. Jessica Simpson?
2. Miley, Taylor Swift, Taylor Momsen, ALL THEM HOS (is it hoes or hos?)
3. Alec Baldwin
4. Gwen Paltrow
"Suicide hotline, please hold"
I forgot about "friendly" Matthew Perry and Matt Le Blanc. Yeah, they have had a lot of gay rumors over the years.
I still say the last one is Wretched Ray. It fits her totally. Kelly Ripa is a good guess, but she never states "everyone" can be like her, Wretched Ray does and Wretched Ray has a rag out called "Everyday with Wretched Ray." The title makes me want to barf just writing it out. She can't go home and cook for her perv hubby with a million television shows either. Besides, she lies about EVERYTHING! She lies about her smoking (she smokes), she lies about her background (many NY stories about that), and she got dumped from Dunkin Doughnuts for drinking Starbucks.
Can you tell I can't stand Wretched Ray?
I think Matthew Perry is the "friendly" one, and I think it's Kelly Ripa for the "does all the shopping and cooking" one.
#2 is definitely Miley because her mom had some meeting with Lynne Spears and decided she didn't want Miley to end up like JL.
The last one, I think, is Kelly Ripa. I would have said Reese Witherspoon because she always claims that she cooks for her kids but she isn't married anymore so I'm going with Kelly.
I agree with #4 being Rachael Ray. Even though she doesn't have kids, she's always harping on and on about cooking for her in-laws and her Mom in addition to going grocery shopping and cooking every single night for her creepy husband (who's into kinky masochistic shit with sex hookers).
Yeah, she claims she goes to the grocery store and people ask her questions about cooking and shit. Right! Like the Mom jeans wearing Claymate types wouldn't mob her Oprah backed fat ass!
Plus, how many shows does this whore have on the Food Network, in addition to her Oprah produced show, her books, her magazine? This whore is really gonna make dinner for her pervy husband every night with all that shit going on? Oh, and he married her ass before she got Oprah money, so no iron clad pre-nup. That's why this divorce is taking so long.
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Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...
http://gosselinswithoutpity.blogspot.com/
BARF!!!! This was worse than goop.