Ivana Better Not Marry This One
Ivana Trump quit her fourth husband only 3 months ago and she's already got a new diaper-wearing boy toy to keep her turkey arms gobblin' at night. Ivana was in Paris last night with some 22-year-old model type who goes by the name of John-David Dery. Yes, he's 22 and she's fucking 59.
Ivana obviously loves the scent of baby powder on the nuts and John-David loves her money. And from the looks of him, he probably loves the scent of baby powder on the nuts too. The dude doesn't look like a vagina-only kind of boy.
This bitch is going to get her gold digging membership card revoked if she marries this one. Fuck it, ride it, suck it, eat it and then throw that shit away! She does not need any legal ties to that dick. His ass is going to do whatever it takes for her to say "I do." He'll even deal with her pissing on his dick during fucky times. Okay, let's talk about this for a quick second.
My horny aunt once told me that she couldn't hold her water during sex anymore. She actually said that she "wets on the penis" sometimes. I figured she meant she was just busting nuts, but she cleared it up for me, "No. I go #1." She actually said #1. We're talking about pissing during fucking and she tries to be all polite-like. Anyway, she said that in her old age, she has that problem now. I asked some other oldies about it and they said it never happens to them. So my aunt obviously just has a pissy pussy. For some reason when I saw these pictures of Ivana and her new piece, I thought of pissy pussy.
Here's Ivana, her plastic cat face and her toy at some restaurant in Paris last night.
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She should suck 'em, fuck 'em, and chuck 'em. At least that's what I do.
deb, really...IT is never "gone".
jiggy, a twilight fan? never would have called that one? you should probably get to bed now kiddo.
i've said it before and i'll say it again, i'm all about getting legal aged young stuff when you can, but you seriously cannot expect me to believe ivana is just 59! i'm seeing sags and wrinkles everywhere...what does she do with her millions if she can't find a plastic surgeon to keep her shit tight and refreshed...
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he doesn't know anything, he didn't do anything, and he doesn't give a shit...
Submitted by angel_i on Tue, 12/02/2008 - 11:37pm.
So do I. I'm going to Newark tomorrow, I'll ask one of the homeless squeegee guys for any useful tips.
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I am the devil, and I am here to do the devil's work.
Some scientist should look at this photo and find a way to botox someone's fucking arm. Face looks like a wax figure, arm looks like the fucking cryptkeeper.
With vaginal rejuvenation and g spot enhancement this old bitty is good to go...maybe
Between two evils, I always pick the one I never tried before.
http://www.myspace.com/384080529
Submitted by TITS on Tue, 12/02/2008 - 11:35pm.
Submitted by Team Valtrex on Tue, 12/02/2008 - 11:24pm.
Submitted by angel_i on Tue, 12/02/2008 - 11:08pm.
I was gonna say something about this. It's not pee. Please don't ask me how I know.
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Careful, you're in Canada, you'll end up with a hockey rink down there.
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"It's not a hockey game if there's no blood on the ice!"
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LOL! You just reminded me. I had my artiste friend's daughter with us and we were picking up a burger....they had a little TV. Suddenly she yells: OMG Those people are fighting in that ice baseball game! LOL!
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Submitted by Team Valtrex on Tue, 12/02/2008 - 11:28pm.
Submitted by angel_i on Tue, 12/02/2008 - 11:26pm.
I'm totally getting you a squeegee for Christmas.
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Thanks, TV;) I hope I need it:)
Nite, jiggy - sorry I can't tell you the rest. But don't worry - it's just cum=)
♥ ThreadKilla!
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Submitted by Team Valtrex on Tue, 12/02/2008 - 11:28pm.
Submitted by angel_i on Tue, 12/02/2008 - 11:26pm.
I'm totally getting you a squeegee for Christmas.
*
A zamboni would be more apt.
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You JJers don’t mind if I remove my panties as I type this do you?… TL incatneato.
Submitted by Team Valtrex on Tue, 12/02/2008 - 11:24pm.
Submitted by angel_i on Tue, 12/02/2008 - 11:08pm.
I was gonna say something about this. It's not pee. Please don't ask me how I know.
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Careful, you're in Canada, you'll end up with a hockey rink down there.
*
"It's not a hockey game if there's no blood on the ice!"
+~~~+~~~+~~~+~~~+~~~+~~~+~~~+~~~+
You JJers don’t mind if I remove my panties as I type this do you?… TL incatneato.
Nite, Jiggy
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I am the devil, and I am here to do the devil's work.
Submitted by angel_i on Tue, 12/02/2008 - 11:08pm.
I was gonna say something about this. It's not pee. Please don't ask me how I know.
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So, how do you know??
I give up. I can no longer keep my one good eye open.
Nite nite.
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Heaven help you if you have a different opinion to express, or GOD help you if you don't run spell-check OR you don't have perfect puncuation!--Mix Well
Submitted by Team Valtrex on Tue, 12/02/2008 - 11:24pm.
Submitted by angel_i on Tue, 12/02/2008 - 11:08pm.
I was gonna say something about this. It's not pee. Please don't ask me how I know.
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Careful, you're in Canada, you'll end up with a hockey rink down there.
I hear that Niagra Falls on the Canadian side is quite beautiful.
Angel i, splash.
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I'm just here for the beer.
Submitted by angel_i on Tue, 12/02/2008 - 11:26pm.
I'm totally getting you a squeegee for Christmas.
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I am the devil, and I am here to do the devil's work.
Submitted by angel_i on Tue, 12/02/2008 - 11:22pm.
Oh man. You know that anything we could imagine would have to be worse than the real thing, right?
I am wracking my brain cell trying to think of what secretion could possibly make an unfortunate appearance down there, beyond the substances already discussed.
It fair boggles the mind.
Was it..er, The Syphilis?
Does this have something to do with Kim Zolciak's hair falling out?
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Heaven help you if you have a different opinion to express, or GOD help you if you don't run spell-check OR you don't have perfect puncuation!--Mix Well
O - I can tell you what it is.
It's ejaculate.
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Submitted by TITS on Tue, 12/02/2008 - 11:23pm.
Submitted by Manimal5 on Tue, 12/02/2008 - 11:18pm.
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I'm chuckling as I picture MK watching female ejaculation porn.
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OMG! I can totally see him really for real ROFLHAO!
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Submitted by angel_i on Tue, 12/02/2008 - 11:08pm.
I was gonna say something about this. It's not pee. Please don't ask me how I know.
*********************************************
Careful, you're in Canada, you'll end up with a hockey rink down there.
***********************************************
I am the devil, and I am here to do the devil's work.
Submitted by Manimal5 on Tue, 12/02/2008 - 11:18pm.
*
I'm chuckling as I picture MK watching female ejaculation porn.
+~~~+~~~+~~~+~~~+~~~+~~~+~~~+~~~+
You JJers don’t mind if I remove my panties as I type this do you?… TL incatneato.
Submitted by jiggywiddit on Tue, 12/02/2008 - 11:18pm.
Submitted by angel_i on Tue, 12/02/2008 - 11:08pm.
Submitted by TexnDoc on Tue, 12/02/2008 - 9:02pm.
I was gonna say something about this. It's not pee. Please don't ask me how I know.
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OK, angel, don't be a gossip tease. TELL US WHAT IT IS.
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O no, no. You do NOT want to hear that story. LOL!
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Submitted by angel_i on Tue, 12/02/2008 - 11:08pm.
Submitted by TexnDoc on Tue, 12/02/2008 - 9:02pm.
I was gonna say something about this. It's not pee. Please don't ask me how I know.
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OK, angel, don't be a gossip tease. TELL US WHAT IT IS.
I was going to go to bed and hope to wake up a nicer person, but now I am morbidly curious.
Looks like I'm facing yet another day being cranky and ill-tempered (and yet literate).
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Heaven help you if you have a different opinion to express, or GOD help you if you don't run spell-check OR you don't have perfect puncuation!--Mix Well
Submitted by angel_i on Tue, 12/02/2008 - 11:08pm.
Submitted by TexnDoc on Tue, 12/02/2008 - 9:02pm.
<" she couldn't hold her water during sex anymore">
I believe it's called "squirting", MK. Go to some porn site that sells DVDs and search it. It's a billion-dollar industry, I'd bet. They try to sell it as cumming, but they're just peeing and screaming.
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I was gonna say something about this. It's not pee. Please don't ask me how I know. But then I thought - you know, SHE is prolly peeing. She prolly is.
Angel..."Please don't ask me how I know" is like the "don't click here button.
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I'm just here for the beer.
Submitted by Team Valtrex on Tue, 12/02/2008 - 11:12pm.
Submitted by angel_i on Tue, 12/02/2008 - 11:08pm.
She probably realized what a mistake those crotchless Depends were though.
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Yeah, and it's a good thing she doesn't wear a purity ring either cuz that is not quite as easy a mess to clean, nawmsayin'?
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Submitted by Team Valtrex on Tue, 12/02/2008 - 11:11pm.
I was probably polishing my hammer.
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*pregnant pause*
Y'know, TV, we could do the toolbox analogy thing, but somebody is bound to get screwed.
Cuz ppl around here always have an ax to grind.
Or we'd end up talking about who we want to nail.
So...how big is your hammer?
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Heaven help you if you have a different opinion to express, or GOD help you if you don't run spell-check OR you don't have perfect puncuation!--Mix Well
Submitted by angel_i on Tue, 12/02/2008 - 11:08pm.
She probably realized what a mistake those crotchless Depends were though.
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I am the devil, and I am here to do the devil's work.
Submitted by jiggywiddit on Tue, 12/02/2008 - 11:05pm.
I took woodshop, but I missed that somehow. I was probably polishing my hammer.
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I am the devil, and I am here to do the devil's work.
Submitted by TexnDoc on Tue, 12/02/2008 - 9:02pm.
<" she couldn't hold her water during sex anymore">
I believe it's called "squirting", MK. Go to some porn site that sells DVDs and search it. It's a billion-dollar industry, I'd bet. They try to sell it as cumming, but they're just peeing and screaming.
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I was gonna say something about this. It's not pee. Please don't ask me how I know. But then I thought - you know, SHE is prolly peeing. She prolly is.
♥ ThreadKilla!
A DListed Youtube Gallery
Submitted by Team Valtrex on Tue, 12/02/2008 - 11:03pm.
Submitted by jiggywiddit on Tue, 12/02/2008 - 11:01pm.
Thanks, what's "puncuation"?
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I don't know. I didn't take wood shop. The Jig justs cuts and pastes, baby! ;-)
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Heaven help you if you have a different opinion to express, or GOD help you if you don't run spell-check OR you don't have perfect puncuation!--Mix Well
Submitted by stinkbutt on Tue, 12/02/2008 - 10:59pm.
Nothing wrong with having a good time.
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Thank you for the voice of reason. I heartily concur. And of course I would hit it (the young one).
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Heaven help you if you have a different opinion to express, or GOD help you if you don't run spell-check OR you don't have perfect puncuation!--Mix Well
DAE-
You crack me up. Love ya!
Submitted by jiggywiddit on Tue, 12/02/2008 - 11:01pm.
Thanks, what's "puncuation"?
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I am the devil, and I am here to do the devil's work.
He just needed help with his math homework, and she's showing him how many times 23 goes into 84.
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I am the devil, and I am here to do the devil's work.
Submitted by Team Valtrex on Tue, 12/02/2008 - 10:59pm.
Sometimes you just need to flush twice.
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You and Deb are so funny. Wish I could party with you, beyond the screen.
But if we did you might give the side-eye to my Twilight t-shirt.
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Heaven help you if you have a different opinion to express, or GOD help you if you don't run spell-check OR you don't have perfect puncuation!--Mix Well
He is one hot piece. I would powder his young soft bottom *wink wink*
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Submitted by Mix Well on Tue, 12/02/2008 - 10:45pm.
Aw, now I feel bad. Don't leave. Really.
You're growing on me. I like feisty. Give us a chance.
Our blog culture here is snarkolepsy. It's nothing personal.
That said, outing DebFrmHell's info on JJ was just rude.
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Heaven help you if you have a different opinion to express, or GOD help you if you don't run spell-check OR you don't have perfect puncuation!--Mix Well
She's starting to look like that cat woman.
He's not even that cute. How he became a model I don't know. Looks like she's just having a good time. I'm sure when she wants to date seriously it won't be with a 23 year old, it will be with a 12yr old...j/k. I'm sure she will find someone more her age. Nothing wrong with having a good time.
Submitted by DebFrmHell on Tue, 12/02/2008 - 10:56pm.
Dayum, I am glad THAT is gone...
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Sometimes you just need to flush twice.
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I am the devil, and I am here to do the devil's work.
Dayum, I am glad THAT is gone...
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Shadow was the best doggie boy ever...10/08/08
MK you need to officially open 'The MK School of Proper Gold Digging'.Bitches are failing you right and left, even one as accomplished and vintage as Ivana. Now she is the gold(old)mine and other bitches are digging her old I mean gold.
That being said, how the hell does this dude look at an woman three times his age and think anything even remotely romantic!! Thats one desperate bitch, right in the league of the playboy whores who suck Hefner's dick . YES, Ivana is the female Hefner.Thats one thing to be proud of.whatever happens to the 'relationship' (HA!)between these two nausea inducing douchebags, the dude is introduced to the high society. when he has sucked enough on Ivana's pruny tits, and she dumps him or he dumps her, he will have a lot of pruny,dry vaginas in the high society with ex-husbands' money to take him on a yatch, but him D&G suits, order him expensive wine in restaurants. Once dude has taste of finer things in life(and that does include dry ,wrinkly vaginas), he aint going back. He is gonna let more cougars ride his ....
She slept with Donald Trump, so obviously she has no shame. I like that. I'd totally hit that for $47.50 + 18% gratuity.
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I am the devil, and I am here to do the devil's work.
High all around douche factor.
MK you need to officially open 'The MK School of Proper Gold Digging'.Bitches are failing you right and left, even one as accomplished and vintage as Ivana. Now she is the gold(old)mine and other bitches are digging her old I mean gold.
That being said, how the hell does this dude look at an woman three times his age and think anything even remotely romantic!! Thats one desperate bitch, right in the league of the playboy whores who suck Hefner's dick . YES, Ivana is the female Hefner.Thats one thing to be proud of.whatever happens to the 'relationship' (HA!)between these two nausea inducing douchebags, the dude is introduced to the high society. when he has sucked enough on Ivana's pruny tits, and she dumps her or he dumps him, he will have a lot of pruny,dry vaginas in the high society with ex-husbands' money to take him on a yatch, but him D&G suits, order him expensive wine in restaurants. Once dude has taste of finer things in life(and that does include dry ,wrinkly vaginas), he aint going back. He is gonna let more cougars ride his ....
If only Jackie Susann were still alive. She could write the cattiest book about this (and it would make a great trash film for Madonna).
giggy! wow. wood shop. you really are a cyber bully.
deb...even more pathetic...a joiner.
nothing here is worth any more time. on the bright side, you can say you ran a troll off! good for you!!! zzz
Submitted by DebFrmHell on Tue, 12/02/2008 - 10:30pm.
Do you think MixWell could actually be JJ herself??
*ponders*
No, JJ is known for using spell-check, proper grammar and syntax most of the time.
MixWell was clearly not an English major...hmmm, let's see. What did MixWell major in? I got it--Wood Shop!
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Heaven help you if you have a different opinion to express, or GOD help you if you don't run spell-check OR you don't have perfect puncuation!--Mix Well
Submitted by jiggywiddit
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
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Shadow was the best doggie boy ever...10/08/08
@ MixWell- you cured me of being sad by making me LMAO. And for that I sincerely thank you.
@ DebFrmHvn-- THAT'S how you get it to surface.
*winks*
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Heaven help you if you have a different opinion to express, or GOD help you if you don't run spell-check OR you don't have perfect puncuation!--Mix Well
Toby just itched his ass on the carpet and VOILA...you get MixWell
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Shadow was the best doggie boy ever...10/08/08
jiggywiddit, wow. you are a sad person. you were called out. let it go.
debfromhell, joiner?
That azzhat put my personal information out at JJ one day when some of ours went and mimmicked them.
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Shadow was the best doggie boy ever...10/08/08