This Shit Is Impossible
If Mary-Kate Olsen is fucking pregnant, then I better go to the vet, because I might have immaculately conceived a litter of Spaghetti Cat's kittens. If that evil troll can get knocked up, anybody can.
Some obvious jokester told the National Enquirer (via PC) that MK is carrying the little troll child of boyfriend Nate Lowman. The joke-teller said, "Mary-Kate has been looking a lot rounder recently. It is good she has put on weight, because she previously suffered from anorexia, but a lot of people think she could actually be attempting to hide her pregnancy. She is really happy with Nate and is very excited they will soon be starting their family together"
She apparently weighs 102lbs now. Yes, 102. What a fucking lard ass, right? If she weighs 102, she's obviously pregnant with 4 baby elephants. Or maybe she drank too much of her own saliva? Either or.
I mean, I don't even think she has baby making parts down there! Trolls don't fuck! They get their kicks by rubbing squirrel bones together while chewing on wet bark. I refuse to believe this shit, until I see her posing with this on the cover of People Magazine.
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celeb pregnancy rumors have got to stop!! this is ridiculous...when did all this start anyway? it used to be normal at some point, wasnt it?
maybe next it will move on to celebrity pet pregnancy rumors. thank god men cant get pregnant too because then it would be double the b.s.
She looks bloated from all the booze.
That's not coffee in those Starbucks cups she always has in her claws.
So this means I am in fact pregnant. I have been looking just a bit bit round near my lower abdominal area. My bf just mentioned last night so if that bitch is getting "rounder" anyone can right? and it means you are pregnant... no pregnancy test for me!
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"Hahaha....you are eating my caca and paying for it. Meeeeow." No gracias. MK
I bet the baby was conceived under a bridge...
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All we are....is dust in the wind, dude.
-Ted "Theodore" Logan
Not too surprising, really -- Nicole Richie got knocked up when she was skin and bones. But do trolls even have sex? Or do they just eat little children under their bridges, and pop out a trollsprog or two?
Hell, I betcha she'll have triplets just to try to be ubertrendy. And she'll name them something like Milwaukee Douchebag, Quasimodo Fairywings and Mary-Jane Busdriver...
She already has plans to skins it and makes a troll coat.
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Is it Jan 20 yet?
Submitted by dramaqueen365247 on Mon, 12/01/2008 - 12:54pm.
Lovely. The baby will come out of the chute w/ a pack of Marlboros in one hand & a bottle of Ipecac in the other.
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LOL, I pictured the baby as being just a big head on a stick.
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I'm not an amateur psychologist; I just play one on the internet.
Why yes it is a cigarette, but you have to remember, it is her only form of nourishment.
Lovely. The baby will come out of the chute w/ a pack of Marlboros in one hand & a bottle of Ipecac in the other.
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"I'm intellectual & stuff." "You're flunking English. That's your mother tongue & stuff."
http://www.myspace.com/dramaqueen365247
Fuck! Is that cigarette in her little troll claw? Real healthy, bitch.
If she is pregnant then, I am pregnant and there is a star in the east!
She's supposedly 5'1" (155cm).
*i meant isn't THAT skinny
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How can you thank God for a song that the Devil helped you write?
i stand corrected aquarius--saget has ruined all the tanner girls!
Submitted by Snarkley on Mon, 12/01/2008 - 12:46pm.
She probably just wants to be trendy and think of some whacky name to give it.
heeheehee
102 is THAT skinny for someone who's a borderline midget.
I'm really over the baby trend. Next thing you know, she'll be pregnant with twins!
*gag*
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How can you thank God for a song that the Devil helped you write?
"They get their kicks by rubbing squirrel bones together while chewing on wet bark."
WTF!!! LMAO!!!
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Why be difficult when I roll dem bones to be impossible!
wow, if this is true, let's hope this self important little douche will eat enough to insure the health of the poor baby.
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"I'm pretty sure I asked you to pick up some Pecan Sandies."
She probably just wants to be trendy and think of some whacky name to give it.
Submitted by gigi jenkins on Mon, 12/01/2008 - 12:40pm.
DJ might have turned out "okay", but she is a huge Jesus freak of the Kirk Cameron variety.
102lbs isn't that skinny for her...is she even 5 ft?
*yawn*
She apparently weighs 102lbs now.
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Whale.
Seriously though (ok, not really), I don't think mom jeans come that small.
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I'm not an amateur psychologist; I just play one on the internet.
what do these girls do??!! i expected more from the tanner girls i really did, i blame the douche saget--dj was the only one who turned out okay!! wtf!!
She's just getting rounder because that is how trolls are supposed to look. From eating the 3 billy goats gruff.
Heyyyy, I saw this on a blind item! Finally, one of them turned out to be right! The blind item said she was faking it, though, so I guess we'll find out soon enough.
(It was something like, "Which actress, whose name has been dragged through the weeds, is wearing more hideously baggy clothes than usual in order to spark pregnancy rumors?" I immediately thought MK because of the weeds reference.)
If the girl is pregnant, she'll put on a more realistic 4 pounds.. and Oh how the "fat ass" comments will be flung in her direction until my throat is sore!
PRUNE BABY!
"Going gray is like ejaculating. You know it can happen prematurely, but when it actually does, it's a total shock." MAH BOO!!!
Perhaps Nicole is one of her Influences.
God help us all if Wino ever got knocked up with Blaaaaake's crack baby.
I kinda hope Mary-Kate's actually pregnant. It'd be nice to see her put about 30 pounds on.
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"It's not true I had nothing on ~ I had the radio on."
As I've said before, if Nicole Richie can get knocked up so can any other person.
Wino, why not?
Mary Kate, possible.
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CROCS are made in the devil's workshop. Yes, they are!
Nooo moorree baabbiieeesss!
If she starts nesting under bridges, you know she's knocked up.