This Shit Is Impossible
If Mary-Kate Olsen is fucking pregnant, then I better go to the vet, because I might have immaculately conceived a litter of Spaghetti Cat's kittens. If that evil troll can get knocked up, anybody can.
Some obvious jokester told the National Enquirer (via PC) that MK is carrying the little troll child of boyfriend Nate Lowman. The joke-teller said, "Mary-Kate has been looking a lot rounder recently. It is good she has put on weight, because she previously suffered from anorexia, but a lot of people think she could actually be attempting to hide her pregnancy. She is really happy with Nate and is very excited they will soon be starting their family together"
She apparently weighs 102lbs now. Yes, 102. What a fucking lard ass, right? If she weighs 102, she's obviously pregnant with 4 baby elephants. Or maybe she drank too much of her own saliva? Either or.
I mean, I don't even think she has baby making parts down there! Trolls don't fuck! They get their kicks by rubbing squirrel bones together while chewing on wet bark. I refuse to believe this shit, until I see her posing with this on the cover of People Magazine.
oh no more trolls!
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In America, anyone can become president. That’s the problem.
Submitted by parissucksliterally on Mon, 12/01/2008 - 2:53pm.
The Skinny website sucks. Rian is an idiot....and the chicks there call anyone who is over 100 lbs fat.
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I agree! That place is balls... reading the comments there is a sure way to lose brain cells.
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My other gig
My other hangout
LMFAO! I have that baby troll doll from back in the day. But my kids cut off all it's hairs.
"fuckity fuck fuck!"
"Fuckin a fucker. I should have used the word fuck more..."
"TENNIS CANS AND MOTHER FUCKEN GREEN BEANS!"
Ugh, she looks like she stinks.
I never thought she had sex.I thought of her like a female Michael Jackson.She just doesn't seem sexual at all in any way.
Between two evils, I always pick the one I never tried before.
http://www.myspace.com/384080529
Submitted by Hekki on Mon, 12/01/2008 - 6:20pm.
Submitted by ImpertinentVixen: "The end of the world is nigh upon us. A fetus cannot live on nicotine and frappuccinos."
Oh yeah? Two (okay, three) words: SPF and Jayden James.
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And look how they turned out!
*rimshot*
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Sweet barbecued Jesus with a side of cole slaw, I'm this close to just rolling down the subway stairs and out onto the third rail. - Jan_In_The_Pan
Magic Trolls cannot get pregnant!
All joking aside, it's entirely possible. I have a friend her size who menstruates regularly.
Submitted by louise_brooks on Mon, 12/01/2008 - 3:03pm.
Yeah, it was on the ADC website, I mentioned it earlier but it got buried :) It can hardly even be called a blind item, how many famous twins are there? But yeah, that item came immediately to mind when I read this post.
Submitted by ImpertinentVixen: "The end of the world is nigh upon us. A fetus cannot live on nicotine and frappuccinos."
Oh yeah? Two (okay, three) words: SPF and Jayden James.
Two words: NOT POSSIBLE!
Pregnant you say? Why am I reminded of the birth scene in "V".
(Young people, Youtube it, you'll see what I mean.)
I doubt this story is true. If it is, I'm sure the trollette will look like this:
http://blogs.zdnet.com/open-source/images/troll.jpg
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→←...When you come to a fork in the road, take it...◘•♣♣ Yogi Bera →←
She probably hasn't digested her infamous bagels yet. Another annoying billionaire cunt who has nothing else to do but make society sick.
Her cokehead face makes me feel sorry for the possible mini-olsen.
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"Our business in life is not to succeed but to continue to fail in good spirits" RL Stevenson
The end of the world is nigh upon us. A fetus cannot live on nicotine and frappuccinos.
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Sweet barbecued Jesus with a side of cole slaw, I'm this close to just rolling down the subway stairs and out onto the third rail. - Jan_In_The_Pan
Poppa Saget would be so proud of is troll twin. Now a proud momma to a pack of cigs...cough..baby. LOL
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Pretty looks fade...dumb is forever -- Judge Judy
Wasn't there a blind item a while back about a twin faking a pregnancy to get talked about? I'll see if I can find it.
The Skinny website sucks. Rian is an idiot....and the chicks there call anyone who is over 100 lbs fat.
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Never thought I'd be alright, til you came and changed my life
World was cloudy, now it's clear; you're the light that I needed
- Christina Aguilera "Ain't No Other Man"
Submitted by dramaqueen365247 on Mon, 12/01/2008 - 12:54pm. "Lovely. The baby will come out of the chute w/ a pack of Marlboros in one hand & a bottle of Ipecac in the other".
Thanx DQ! Do you know how hard it is to laugh and not cause a coughing fit? That visual is hilarious, except instead of Ipecac, it will be a nice green bottle of Citrate of Mag. Too hard to by the chug and yak stuff OTC anymore.
Payday came and with it beer.
~~Rudyard Kipling~~
I forgot all about that skinny website! I haven't been there in ages. It's probably better not to obsess over those things anyway.
I'm pretty sure Rian's posted about this too, I'm not going to even bother checking either. She says it's not a pro-ana site, but all those chicks eventually show up and start stating their height and weight stats and clothing sizes, it gets really pathetic after awhile...
Your face!
Submitted by kitkat918 on Mon, 12/01/2008 - 2:07pm.
Hey now, I'm 5'5", and I weigh 95lbs. 102 would be heavy for me too! People are just different!
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Red hair is different, that which you just described sounds very unhealthy.
Here march in the pro anna's.
man, let's hope it doesn't happen, the chicks on the skinny website are brutally delusional and diet-obsessed... You know, just like the site owner.
MK are you trying to bring all the commenters from The Skinny Website on here with this post...?! She probably did swallow all her own saliva, the effin heifer!
Your face!
Submitted by kitkat918 on Mon, 12/01/2008 - 2:07pm.
Hey now, I'm 5'5", and I weigh 95lbs. 102 would be heavy for me too! People are just different!
^^^^
spoken like a true anorexic
Aw, Hell to tha NO!
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President Obama - Get used to it! :)
She's NOT. end of story.
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All we are....is dust in the wind, dude.
-Ted "Theodore" Logan
Submitted by kitkat918 on Mon, 12/01/2008 - 2:07pm.
Hey now, I'm 5'5", and I weigh 95lbs. 102 would be heavy for me too! People are just different!
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holy shit! I am 5'6" and lean...I was a stick at 110 lbs....you must be so skinny! Are you ok? (sincerely) 95 lbs seems to be extremely underweight for our height.....
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Never thought I'd be alright, til you came and changed my life
World was cloudy, now it's clear; you're the light that I needed
- Christina Aguilera "Ain't No Other Man"
Everyone forgets that Nicole got pregnant to avoid jailtime.... This better be fake.. cause those chicks are too sick and selfish to be moms.
According to the AMA, womwn that are 5'5 should NOT way less than 120- 125! THere is no way in hell that this troll is 5'5.
"because I might have immaculately conceived a litter of Spaghetti Cat's kittens."
-AHa ha ha ha, nice visual. laugh out loud moment of my day.
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"And I went through this whole thing; am I gay?! Am I straight?! And I realized: I'm just slutty." ~Margaret Cho
"This is supposed to be about delicious booze!" ~MK
Hey now, I'm 5'5", and I weigh 95lbs. 102 would be heavy for me too! People are just different!
why do the selfish h'wood twats keep having/wanting babies?!?!?!?!
Vote for me in the 'Worst Fashion Moment' contest every day @ http://www.pronto.com/87060-WM?successMsg=true !
Your right she probably doesn't have her period because the bitch is so skinny. Hmm maybe I should try that and starve myself? I'm tired of sleeping with a towel between my legs every month.
Good lord! Jesus, Allah who ever you are save us all! 102 pounds?
Submitted by mike on Mon, 12/01/2008 - 1:16pm.
C'mon, Mary Kate's body is so starved it will just absorb the baby for its nutrients.
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Bwaahahahaa!
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Fearless
No way I believe this. Shes probably doesn't even get her period shes so thin.
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Blinded by their greed, they took them without question, one by one falling into darkness. Now they are slaves to his will.
Ok. According to the Troll Name Generator, the baby will be named NightElf Pettrimmer Trollsen.
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I wish I had a million dollars... Hot dog!
OK, baby will need actual food. Her present diet of nicotine, diuretics and booze won't cut it.
Submitted by The C word on Mon, 12/01/2008 - 1:14pm.
I hope she names the baby "Flannel"...
she's gonna name her baby Versace...or something like that...
Bull fucking SHIT.
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Never thought I'd be alright, til you came and changed my life
World was cloudy, now it's clear; you're the light that I needed
- Christina Aguilera "Ain't No Other Man"
one must menstruate to get pregnant...or so i thought...this troll hasn't had a period in 4ever...and eww...i just realized that trolls have sex??!!!
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he doesn't know anything, he didn't do anything, and he doesn't give a shit...
C'mon, Mary Kate's body is so starved it will just absorb the baby for its nutrients.
or at least marinate.
I hope she names the baby "Flannel"...
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I'm not an amateur psychologist; I just play one on the internet.
Don't you have to menstruate to conceive? No way anyone that skinny menstruates with any regularity.
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Blackout
Circus
Coma
What a fucking lard ass, right? If she weighs 102, she's obviously pregnant with 4 baby elephants.
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hahaha
Submitted by Marilyn v2.0
I kinda hope Mary-Kate's actually pregnant. It'd be nice to see her put about 30 pounds on.
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She'd probably plunge into a deep depression. I used to work with this chick who was pregnant and would only eat an apple for lunch even though the doctor told her the baby was underweight! What a selfish bitch. Seems like horrible people can always reproduce. Not that all parents are horrible people...you get what I mean.
"Just wondering but how many of you bitches acctually read the book? because Im thinkin not many of you have the brain spain too read...."
-Mrs.Hardin21 on Twilight
I call bullshit on this one. I doubt this bitch even gets her period anymore.