Dallas Austin Confirms The Obvious
The singing voice of this generation will never get a chance to share her beautiful gift on the world's stage.
On "The Real Housewives of Atlanta," mega producer Dallas Austin was helping Kim become the next Dolly Parton or something. There was always a problem though. First of all, Dolly would never put Kim's stuffed animal wig on her head. Second of all, Kim has the voice of a dying wild boar. Dallas knew this all along, but he was apparently only helping Kim for TV. Wait. You're telling me parts of reality TV are scripted and not real?! Next you're going to tell me that Kim really is 30! Sorry, I will NEVER believe that. Even if you shove her birth certificate down my throat. I'll gladly swallow it, shake my head and still say, "Nope. Tastes phony."
Anyway, Dallas posted the picture above on his MySpace blog along with the message:
... THE "REAL" Housewife, Kim Zolciak, is NOT WORKING WITH ME --WE ARE NOT DOING A SONG...
WE ARE NOT DOING AN ALBUM!!
*** JUST WANNA PUT THIS OUT THERE!!! ***
The CAPS means he's fucking serious! And the *s means he's very VERY serious. I got Dallas' message loud and clear, but we all already knew this. The chunky loogie I spit up this morning has a better chance of releasing an album than Kim does.
On last night's season finale (*TEARS*), Dallas called up Kim to tell her that she's not taking this singing this seriously. He told her she had to quit smoking and start running 3 hours a day. He's right. Her wig could use the exercise. It's looking a little chunky in the mid-section.
And I love that at the beginning of the clip Kim is telling her nanny/assistant to return some stuff to Neiman Marcus and Gucci. What the hell is this low budget bitch buying from Gucci?! Her clothes look like they come directly from the clearance rack at Dot's.
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Submitted by TITS on Wed, 11/19/2008 - 5:25pm.
Witnessess have claimed one time at the mall when her daugher slipped up and called her mom Shree went off on her and yelled and said "I told you never to call me that in public, I have an imagine to maintain."
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Please say that isn't a typo!!
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It probably was "I _axed_ you never to call me that in public, I have an imagine to maintain."
http://www.burdaburdaburda.com/2008/04/12/the-real-housewives-of-atlanta...
OMG!!!!!!! I just spent an HOUR reading this stuff! PURE DIRT!
****"Just remember kids, someone else's meds are always better than your own..."****
Tigerlilly 11/14/08
Witnessess have claimed one time at the mall when her daugher slipped up and called her mom Shree went off on her and yelled and said "I told you never to call me that in public, I have an imagine to maintain."
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Please say that isn't a typo!!
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mrsoul jr and I undestand, we heard Kim sing. AWFUL.
Team NeNe!
Here's the direct link to the black hair media forum: http://forum.blackhairmedia.com/forum_posts.asp?TID=162651&PN=1
I believe the applesauce user was copy/pasting info they found from surfing the web. I couldn't stop reading it...
Big Poppa must be the nastiest perviest bastard to be fucking kim... especially with those toe nails...
Shandi-
I doubt Dallas thinks she has a chance anyway. He tells her to sing while running!! It's comedic. He just doesn't want to work with her.
Submitted by mslewis on Wed, 11/19/2008 - 1:08pm.
I doubt this will hurt Dallas Austin's career. He's a pretty well-respected producer.
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Still, he's _gonna_ be remembered for working with the tonedeaf slut in the wig. Sorry Dallas, you moron now.
"There's a tight-rope. . ." Didn't he say he wrote that song?
Thanks Flatsy! The Burda site was great. To any of you that want to read some dirt on these ho's got to the Burda site in Flatsy's last post.
LOL I KNEW from the moment he heard her sing that he wont sign her a record.
are you kidding me?
she has no talent at all
www.MySpace.com/ItsJonaBitch
How do these old, fug, stupid women end up with these insanely rich men who buy them houses, cars, clothes etc? Just wondering.The economy is sinking and I need to have options!
Kim has a serious case of ghet-toes in the video clip. Someone needs to tell her that 1" long toenails aren't the way to go.
I always thought her "singing" was kind of a running joke just for the series. I had no idea she actually thought she had a good singing voice. I guess it shows how delusional some people can be.
I doubt this will hurt Dallas Austin's career. He's a pretty well-respected producer.
The showdown is going to be yummy. NeNe is gonna kick her ass!
What's she going to do now that Big Papa isn't paying her bills?
This is when the show needs to follow her so we can all see her lose her house and car and go back to her trailer where she belongs.
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Hands off my popwreck!
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www.poorbritney.com
@TITS
I literally spit out my teas when I saw your avie of Brit being eaten by a tiger. You are fucking awesome!
Oh yeah I better hit YouTube to see this Housewife thingy lol
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VROOM VROOM
I'm a squirrel and that feels greaaaat!!
http://www.myspace.com/kokeshidoll1969
I Tivo'd this but haven't watched it!! Ugghh... BUT next week looks Oh soo good can't wait!
And like Kim is really going run three hours, she'll probably have her assistant do it for her, then she'll put her kids up for adoption just so that they don't stand in her way...
Submitted by Tubereuse on Wed, 11/19/2008 - 11:13am.
He's a lying stank whore just like Kim. And he's prolly a druggie to boot.
*
what sort of a fuckwit takes drugs into a arab country?
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Submitted by Dallas on Wed, 11/19/2008 - 11:15am.
It's a little hard to navigate unregistered, but try this link, 5th topic down:
http://forum.blackhairmedia.com/forum_topics.asp?FID=39
Here is another interesting forum on RHOA-
http://www.burdaburdaburda.com/2008/04/12/the-real-housewives-of-atlanta...
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She's flat and that's that!
So wait, Dallas wasn't doing this as a favor to Big Poppa???
I don't buy that this was part of the script. What dumbass (Kim) would make herself out to look like such an ass if this was really the script?
Submitted by putsomestankonit on Wed, 11/19/2008 -9:05am.
DeShawn's foundation is a front to sell repackaged subprime mortgages to the parents of the young girls she mentors.
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WOW. If this is illegal, I hope she gets busted. I read elsewhere that her real estate co. and foundation don't do any business and her relatives are employed at them and do homework or play videogames all day.
It's far more embarrassing that washed-up Austin would appear on this show to self promote. As if this statement after the show airs would make him look better. NO! It makes you look like an idiot.
Why would a rich woman spoke Newport's? That is a ghetto cigarette, that's why I spoke them..I have to keep myself balanced between young professional and urbanite. You can take the hoe out of the trailer but not the trailer out of the Hoe. Going on my cigarette break now!
Oh no! All her dreams are shattered. *eye roll*
♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥
Catch hot babes, rich and sexy singles@MEET RICH. COM for hotter love, more pleasure, and more fantasy.
putsomestinkonit, I went to blackhairmedia.com and there was nothing on the ho's of Atlanta. Is there another site to go on? Anyone?
He's a lying stank whore just like Kim. And he's prolly a druggie to boot.
from Wikipedia:
On Sunday, July 2, 2006, Austin pleaded guilty to drug charges in Dubai, where Dubai Airport authorities found slightly more than a gram of cocaine in his luggage when he arrived in Dubai, United Arab Emirates, to attend Naomi Campbell's three-day birthday party at the Burj Al Arab hotel.
However, in a surprise turn of events, a few hours after a Dubai court sentenced Austin to a four-year prison term, he received a royal pardon from Dubai ruler Sheikh Mohammed bin Rashid Al Maktoum and was deported, according to U.A.E.-based newspaper Gulfnews.com, even though the United Arab Emirates has a very strict drug enforcement policy and drug traffickers get the death penalty.
I can't wait to find out about Kim's "cancer" next week.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
remember when I longdicked you and broke the ovary
One more thing. Freddie Mercury, who was the best singer EVER actually smoked and drank everyday because he liked the way it made his voice sound! I do understand why this guy is telling Kim to stop smoking and get in shape, but it made me think of Freddie and what he said. Go look at old Queen clips of Freddie singing. He almost always had a cup of beer somewhere nearby.
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"Wait until the bitch finds the family of wombats living in her chocha." - MK
Who else here thinks there is going to be a show called Country Singer Boot Camp?
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"Wait until the bitch finds the family of wombats living in her chocha." - MK
putsomestankonit on Wed, 11/19/2008 - 10:44am
Thanks, I'll check it.
I'm seriously having trouble getting any work done this month. DL, puppies, RHOA, too many distractions.
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She's flat and that's that!
Submitted by Flatsy on Wed, 11/19/2008 - 10:40am.
Submitted by putsomestankonit on Wed, 11/19/2008 - 9:48am
You have great dirt on them. Do you have anything else on the CT sherriff scandal? Is he the father of the older daughter?
No I didn't go to the link to read the court reports. But if you go to blackhairmedia.com and go the thread about this show you can find the link, it should still be up.
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http://scarletwordsandthoughts.blogspot.com/
A place for book lovers
putsomestankonit on Wed, 11/19/2008 - 9:48am
You have great dirt on them. Do you have anything else on the CT sherriff scandal? Is he the father of the older daughter?
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She's flat and that's that!
Submitted by Jimmy Bocca
I'm sorry I don't think much of kim BUT isn't Dallas even lower then kim if he said this stunt was specifically for television and now that the season is over he wants to clear the air???? SHADY ASS FUCK if you were that concerned then why did you play into it in the beginning. DOUCHBAG!
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Well, this is the same dude who outed Joss Stone and Christina Aguilera as "fucking for tracks" girls. Clearly, he doesn't give a shit.
Now that Kim has been dumped by her oh so very married benefactor, what's a dumb ho to do???
Oh well, there's always work at the Bunny Ranch. Get thee to a hookery!! ha ha ha ha ha
the less I know about these two the better. Speaking of musical oddities, carla Bruni is SINGING live on the Today show this morning. ho needs to keep her modeling job.
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how dreadful!
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"And I went through this whole thing; am I gay?! Am I straight?! And I realized: I'm just slutty." ~Margaret Cho
lol i love dots. but i'm minnesotan so it's ok.
Submitted by angel_i on Wed, 11/19/2008 - 9:49am.
Agreed.
That said, if I were smart enough to go back to school (I'm not), I'd be a nurse or a dental hygienist. On that America's Hot People clip, it said Kim was a nurse.
Registered Nurses make about $30 an hour.
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"Michael Phelps - No. The body is sexy, but the face didn't get the memo."--MK
Pretty much everyone in the music biz is a shady ass piece of shi
I'm sorry I don't think much of kim BUT isn't Dallas even lower then kim if he said this stunt was specifically for television and now that the season is over he wants to clear the air???? SHADY ASS FUCK if you were that concerned then why did you play into it in the beginning. DOUCHBAG!
christine the hoff on Wed, 11/19/2008 - 9:26am.
Do you guys really watch this shit?
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Nope, I did see a few minutes of an episode to see what the hell MK was talking about....
PS: she smokes Newports? How CLASSY of her.
Submitted by Leona on Wed, 11/19/2008 - 9:45am.
Submitted by angel_i on Wed, 11/19/2008 - 9:42am.
I'm waiting for Kim to go on The Bachelor and tell the dude to "Google me you fumb duck."
Or something like that, cause she's a businesswoman.
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Yes - in the business of whoring, that is.
♥ ThreadKilla!
A DListed Chola Diary , Lean Like a Chola
It's Britney, Bitch!<
I would love to hear a finished version of tightrope/have it on my ipod forever--did you notice they played sort of an instrumental version of it as the background music at the end of the episode??? It was brilliant !
CTH, the best part about these skanks is none of them are the real elite of Atlanta. None of them really live in Atlanta either. Just like the "Real" Housewives of New York the real social lites wouldn't lower themselves and be caught dead on reality tv. That's another great thing about this show. All of these women are really ghetto bitches who were strippers and married well or just gold diggers. Or in Kim's case lived in a trailer in CT then cheated on husband at the age of 17 with the town's sherriff who was much older and got caught. It was quite the scandal.
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http://scarletwordsandthoughts.blogspot.com/
A place for book lovers
The ole 'make her break up with me, before I break up her her' routine. How professional!!
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It's creamie, not prune!!!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hQbwt-dicpo
Carrying a Gucci bag doesn't mean your classy bitches.
Submitted by angel_i on Wed, 11/19/2008 - 9:42am.
I'm waiting for Kim to go on The Bachelor and tell the dude to "Google me you fumb duck."
Or something like that, cause she's a businesswoman.
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you is chipmunkin times all up in my face and i hate that, you trampy nut gathering woodland creature. (LoLo)
Submitted by Poison Candy Apple on Wed, 11/19/2008 - 9:35am.
Damn, see Stank gave us the dirt and I didn't have to waste any time even watching this shit.
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Stank is the Kojak of this game
@Stanky--
The Atlanta Cheetah Club is a classy place. One night one of their college girls was working her shift, when in walks a group of bankers including this girl's DAD. (Told to me by chick's boyfriend.)
Gross.
If Kim actually has a nursing degree she could make bank working in her field.
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Submitted by putsomestankonit on Wed, 11/19/2008 - 9:11am.
Kim was a popular stripper who went by the name of Barbie and worked at the Cheetah club in Atlanta which is owned by Lee Nijjar.
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you is chipmunkin times all up in my face and i hate that, you trampy nut gathering woodland creature. (LoLo)
"O, I just bought some evening gowns cuz I was bored...." She forgot to add "Don't you wish you were hot like me?" then, of course, she'd have to say: "O yeah. I'm NOT hot. Oopsie!"
ugh, this woman.
♥ ThreadKilla!
A DListed Chola Diary , Lean Like a Chola
It's Britney, Bitch!<