Vintage Kim Zolciak
There was a show back in the day called "Are You Hot?", which was basically "American Idol" for stupid sexy people. Rachel Hunter and the Empress of Lucite's ex-husband Lorenzo Lamas were judges. Sometimes the show had really hot people, but mostly it was a bunch of delusion fools who believed it when their parents told them they were gorgeous. Kim from "The Real Housewives of Atlanta" falls into the latter category.
Bitch was on the second episode of this shit show back in 2003 when she was 24! Seriously, she's 24 here! 24 and she still has hair made from the reject wig pile at the Mattel factory. Was she born with fake hair made of coughed up hairballs? Someone needs to find pictures of her as a child, because I will call it a fucking day if she wore a polyester mop on her head when she was a little girl.
Surprisingly, Kim got a unanimous NOT HOT from the judges. I've never wanted to clap for Lorenzo Lamas before in my life, but I have to give him a standing O for that shit. Below is the clip, but there's no time on it, so you have to FF through it if you really care. Watch Kim's hot dreams get crushed around halfway through it.
Source: TWOP
Thanks Anne
its bruce bitch...
NURSE????????????? Just because you opened up some Ny Quil and trapped your peepaw boyfriend, that does NOT make you a nurse!!!!!! I swear, it looked like Anna Nicole reincarnated... maybe she was Anna Nicole's nurse.. that makes sense...
Ok, so she is actually about 29. She's the leatheriest looking 29 year old I've ever seen. Continuing on, she's still got a sweet rack, and I can't knock that.
Moving on, this show is so awesome for so many different reasons. I literally watched it every week. It took away a large section of my morality (see above comments), but I think it was for the better. As well, who doesn't love laughing at the uber-douche that is Lorenzo Lamas? He used a fucking laser pointer. Like, seriously.
Neither Trashy nor Classy.
24 here?!?!?! hahahaha
wow this could be a PSA for anti-smoking
That show was all kinds of effed up. Thank gwad it tanked. Trash.
Nurse Wretched.
Submitted by A Noun is a per... on Tue, 11/18/2008 - 11:48pm.
A nurse? They said she was a nurse? That's scary.
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you is chipmunkin times all up in my face and i hate that, you trampy nut gathering woodland creature. (LoLo)
That's Carrie Underwood in 20 years.
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http://pornstarbabylon.wordpress.com/
Nurse? nurse? What? Do my ears decieve me? I'd get up outta my hospital bed if she and her wig walked up to my bed with wine in hand to wipe my butt. Nurse?
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"Don't fuck with me fellas. This ain't my first time at the rodeo."
she looks so bad even SHE knew what was in store for her when she walked out on that stage. girlfriend got about halfway out before the "oh shit" look glazed over her already glazed-over eyes. nice hair tho! guess we know why they never made magical tranny-weave barbie.
She looks like Jessica Simpson and that is not a good thing.
Between two evils, I always pick the one I never tried before.
http://www.myspace.com/384080529
A nurse? They said she was a nurse? That's scary.
this made my day. she is such a dumb trailer trash tranny.
Age is not faithful to you Kim.
"I love this record babe... But, I can't see straight anymore"
...now I know who Britney bought her hair from.
ok that was totally addicting
Submitted by joe shmoe on Tue, 11/18/2008 - 7:44pm.
Submitted by Tigerlilly on Tue, 11/18/2008 - 7:18pm.
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Oh, and I remember LL's laser pen and wanting to ruthlessly sodomize him with it, the bastid!
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Am I deviant because I'd like to see that?
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Nah, you're just DListed cuz you'd like to see that...It's kinda the same thing, only kinda, sorta worse...but once it's all over...Funynun's and PURPLE DRANK for everyone....
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Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...
Submitted by stake_spike on Tue, 11/18/2008 - 7:35pm.
OMG this is like straight out of that crap movie Idiocracy.
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That shit is the real Bible, yo.
The read Nostradamus deal, yo!
♥ ThreadKilla!
A DListed Chola Diary , Lean Like a Chola
It's Britney, Bitch!<
At first I didn't think that pic with Lee Najjar was Kim, but it is obviously some fug bitch in a wig. It must be Kim; she and Lee have smug expressions on their faces like "We are having an affair under his wife's nose and nobody suspects".
Sucks to be busted. I can't wait till Lee dumps her 49 year old ass.
And if that is what Kim looked at 24 (don't believe it), maybe she needs MORE botox, not less.
What do you think you're looking at, sugar tits?
That kid Travis van Winkle that got NOT is in Transformers...FUCK! Why did I even watch that whole video?
She even had a busted weave 6 years ago, some things never change. All this does is make her a martyr, but I hope someone interviews her and brings this show up because she'll just say the judges didn't know anything. If you look, Lorenzo Lamas swallows in fear when she comes out.
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remember when I longdicked you and broke the ovary
yeah no seriously. who let the dogs out.
THIS is real catwalk material:
http://www.howlegit.com/link/link_details/s-s--victoria--8217-s-secret-b...
Submitted by joe shmoe on Tue, 11/18/2008 - 7:44pm.
Submitted by Tigerlilly on Tue, 11/18/2008 - 7:18pm.
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Oh, and I remember LL's laser pen and wanting to ruthlessly sodomize him with it, the bastid!
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Am I deviant because I'd like to see that?
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No, you're not. Tigerlilly just teasing us. You know, the ways cats do just before the kill.
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Do not mess with live dragons. You are crunchy and taste good with catsup.
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Submitted by Tigerlilly on Tue, 11/18/2008 - 7:18pm.
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Oh, and I remember LL's laser pen and wanting to ruthlessly sodomize him with it, the bastid!
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Am I deviant because I'd like to see that?
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Il n'ya plus que la Patagonie, la Patagonie, qui convienne à mon immense tristesse..~Blaise Cendrars
Maybe if the show was called "Hot or Not Tranny" she would have won.
OMG this is like straight out of that crap movie Idiocracy. This right here is the devolution of humanity. I never knew this trash existed.
Submitted by Manimal5 on Tue, 11/18/2008 - 7:13pm.
And what did you get if you won? The superficial twat award?
LOL! I think you get one of those if you lose, too!
"This ain't rock n roll. This is genocide!"
Submitted by Tigerlilly on Tue, 11/18/2008 - 7:18pm.
Methinks that LL got onto the laser pointer kick when he discovered the prismatic effect it had on The Empress's lucite.
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Do not mess with live dragons. You are crunchy and taste good with catsup.
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Sometimes these shows speak the truth despite what the actual participants think. I'm glad they made her realize that she needs a new wig!
Your face!
seeing that "not" light up under kim's inflated weave gave me a serious case of the giggles...dreams...dashed...hahhahahaha...
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he doesn't know anything, he didn't do anything, and he doesn't give a shit...
Submitted by Momus the Sarcastic on Tue, 11/18/2008 - 7:07pm.
Tigerlilly: The photo definitely shows that she did not heed your most excellent advice. And, look where she is now: an object international mockery.
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Bitch would have been deemed "hot" if she had heeded my advice...I know how my skank wear 'sposta fit, OKKKKAAAAAYYYY? Talk to the paw...
This is so hilarious because I remember watching this show just to see her! Ha!
Oh, and I remember LL's laser pen and wanting to ruthlessly sodomize him with it, the bastid! But in his defense, he was married to the breathtaking vision that is Shauna Sand....
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Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...
Submitted by Manimal5 on Tue, 11/18/2008 - 7:13pm.
And what did you get if you won? The superficial twat award?
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Isn't that what Paris' New BFF gets?
♥ ThreadKilla!
A DListed Chola Diary , Lean Like a Chola
It's Britney, Bitch!<
Submitted by angel_i on Tue, 11/18/2008 - 7:11pm.
She has Heidi Montag's face, Jessica Simpson's chest, and Paris Hilton's extensions. And, none of them play well together.
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Do not mess with live dragons. You are crunchy and taste good with catsup.
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And what did you get if you won? The superficial twat award?
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I don't wanna be buried in a pet cemetary
I don't wanna live my life aga-uh-in...
@Tigerlilly, Momus, Deb:
I think she was going for that Shauna Sand look..you know, where everything is SUPPOSED to be a size too small and that's how all the good guys know you're an idiot so they're not, at all, intimidated by you....you know - Elegance:)
♥ ThreadKilla!
A DListed Chola Diary , Lean Like a Chola
It's Britney, Bitch!<
Tigerlilly: The photo definitely shows that she did not heed your most excellent advice. And, look where she is now: an object international mockery.
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Do not mess with live dragons. You are crunchy and taste good with catsup.
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BEST FUCKING POST EVER!!!!
She looks alright from far away.
♥ ThreadKilla!
A DListed Chola Diary , Lean Like a Chola
It's Britney, Bitch!<
She was just on the wrong show. She set her sites a little too high.
If she was on "Luke Warm or Not", she mught have had a chance.(they only rate up to a 5)
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I don't wanna be buried in a pet cemetary
I don't wanna live my life aga-uh-in...
Razzledazzleme.... They do have the same witchy features... must have a thing for the FUG... HAHAHA
Tigerlilly
No way! And the dumb ho didn't heed your expert advice? Not Hot indeed!
"This ain't rock n roll. This is genocide!"
Submitted by Tigerlilly on Tue, 11/18/2008 - 6:42pm.
OMG WHORES! I remember this chick! I sold her that shirt she's wearing!
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OMG! It's too bad you din't tell her how ugly she is! LOL!
♥ ThreadKilla!
A DListed Chola Diary , Lean Like a Chola
It's Britney, Bitch!<
Submitted by Tigerlilly on Tue, 11/18/2008 - 6:42pm.
OMG WHORES! I remember this chick!
Too funny. She is curvaceous in a curvy sort of way.
OMG WHORES! I remember this chick! I sold her that shirt she's wearing! Ok, I was working a crappy retail job at a skank wear shop, and Kim comes in and tells me she needs something to wear on t.v., so I, being on commission, pretended to give a rat's ass, and asked her "Oh, what show are you going to be on?"...And she replies, get this shit...Are you ready? You're gonna love it..."It's called America's Hottest People"....BAWAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Anywho, I tried to tell her dumb ass that shirt didn't fit her. The seams that cut across her boobies are supposed to be under them, but she wouldn't listen. You know, bitches that be one size in they head and another in reality? Yeah, well.
I've rubbed elbows with GREATNESS! It still pales in comparison to my sister who met the Empress of Lucite! (I know I'm so jelly, I can't stand it!)
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Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...
What a piece of shit television show.
Those people are vapid!
Exactly Manimal5.
Goodness, I'm just glad she had the presence of mind to remember she wasn't at work.
Otherwise, she would have squatted down on a Coca-Cola bottle for a dollar.
Submitted by devilgirl on Tue, 11/18/2008 - 5:32pm.
Why would anyone be that pathetic and put themselves through that kind of humiliation on national tv? And how much of a zlist celeb do you have to be to be a judge?
And being judged by Lorenzo Lamas?
How about "Are You a Complete Idiot"
"Asshat, Yes or No"
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I don't wanna be buried in a pet cemetary
I don't wanna live my life aga-uh-in...
Wow, a herd of cattle being separated.
I tried to watch the show once ... I was heavily medicated and too lethargic to even use the remote.
Anybut, LL had this thing for using a laser pointer to emphasize a person's physical flaws and/or attributes.
I soon fell asleep.
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Do not mess with live dragons. You are crunchy and taste good with catsup.
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TEE.. look closely, that's KIM on the right!
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Submitted by TEE on Tue, 11/18/2008 - 5:58pm.
For anyone who cares here is a link to a pic of Lee Naajjar he's the dude in the middle.
http://durangotv.blogspot.com/2008/11/photo-of-lee-najjar-atlanta-housew...
I saw Rachel Hunter's soul die during that.