GORGEOUS!
I was going through pictures from the Sydney premiere of "Australia" and my mouse immediately skipped over to this beauty and clicked download. It knows what I like, because this stunning creature just made my fucking day!
Her name is Maria Venuti and according to her bio she "is a vivacious personality - and one of great natural warmth and exuberance. Combined with a dynamic singing voice – these traits have made her career as a performer, actor and entertainer highly successful. As one of this country’s leading performers, Maria has played in every major cabaret venue around Australia, New Zealand, the Far East, Japan as well as entertaining our ‘boys’ in the Sinai Desert."
I'm in love. She has everything I look for in a glamorous beauty: serious eyebrow game, butt cleavage and hair that has seen the inside of a Fry Daddy. Yes, I know her make-up looks like it was done by a group of slow clowns while they all jumped on a trampoline together, but the end result is beautiful. She's one to watch.
On the other side of the coin, Hugh Jackman's tragic wife showed up to the premiere looking like a low-rent vintage Phyllis Diller impersonator. She's no Maria Venuti.
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Oh Maria. She is a superstar in Australia. Usually she has more booz showing than that. You're never too old, gravitating chichis are glamourous too.
My letter to Hugh Jackman~
Dear Hugh,
I must ask you, why do you choose to date a Granny? She looks to be 67, while you look much, much younger. Do you realize how many young, sexy, able and willing females there are out there for you? (Mostly ME) It must be nice having to change your wife's Depends, and having to feed her cold oatmeal with Metamucil everyday but please, for the sake of all available, single women out there, ditch the Memaw~ASAP. It must suck having to fuck your elderly wife while she has a heart monitor, doesn't it?
She is a bio-fem tranny if I ever saw one!She uses the same make-up artist as Xtina no doubt.
Between two evils, I always pick the one I never tried before.
http://www.myspace.com/384080529
leave her alone! Maria Venuti does heaps for charity PLUS she's botox free and rocks teeth that don't glow in the dark!
.....Yes, I know her make-up looks like it was done by a group of slow clowns while they all jumped on a trampoline together, but the end result is beautiful......
Get this whore a Nobel Prize NOW !
You are Beautiful Michael K !!
Uh oh, somebody got her drink on before doing her makeup.
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They were dork-sided!
She's maori. A busted Kiri Ta Kanawa.
Mario?
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I smacked a bitch and I liked it.
I thought Ashlee and Pete finally had their baby.
MK cracks me up when he calls Mrs. Jackman, "Hugh's memaw wife"...hehe...also, I call bollocks on the 8-year age difference, more like 18 years, GAWD WHAT A HAG!!
Hugh, on the other hand, is simply lovely. :)
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What in Sears Portrait Studio hell is this shit?! MK on Britney Spears' album "Circus"
"Yes, I know her make-up looks like it was done by a group of slow clowns while they all jumped on a trampoline together, but the end result is beautiful. She's one to watch".
OMFG. HILLARIOUS. I am crying.
The ugly truth about Jon and Kate Gosselin:
http://gosselinswithoutpity.blogspot.com/
<3-------------------------------<3
RIMADYL KILLS
I wonder if Fox spliced subliminal pictures of this woman into "Australia"? I sure repeated flashes of Maria's gorgon visage will literally petrify the audience, ensuring no walkouts until the three hours are over. Smart marketing there. Good on ya, Baz!
Submitted by weenielover on Tue, 11/18/2008 - 6:34pm.
Is that a woman posing as a man posing as a tranny?? I confuse easily...
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She is a beautiful woman! Can't you see?!?
♥ ThreadKilla!
A DListed Chola Diary , Lean Like a Chola
It's Britney, Bitch!<
Is that a woman posing as a man posing as a tranny?? I confuse easily...
This must must must be a bloke.
Too bad the fat covers the adam's apple and the make-up covers the stubble.
Gorgeous indeed.
* SAVE THE FORESTS, EAT MORE BEAVERS!!!*
Submitted by girl_cheese on Tue, 11/18/2008 - 2:40pm.
I have found my new style guru. It takes balls to do old french whore and really own it. Sure, she scares children. BFD.
I read this twice before I figured out you're not talking about Mrs. Jackman. tee hee
Gosh, it's been a while since I've seen her glorious face. She comes from the same part of Sydney as me. I cannot believe that's actually true. I've never said anything like that about a famous person before. I've arrived.
www.reluctantwhore.com
www.cafepress.com/reluctantwhore
Submitted by Mrs.Kravitz on Tue, 11/18/2008 - 4:19pm.
Submitted by gia on Tue, 11/18/2008 - 4:17pm.
that maria person is actually a woman & NOT a drag queen??? how is that possible?
**
I was thinking the Very Same Exact Thing
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Welcome to Australia. Shallow gene pool.
Submitted by day shift stripper on Tue, 11/18/2008 - 1:38pm.
Okay, I'm not the only person who thought that was Harvey Fierstein.
I was just about to put that and realized I needed to read back through the posts to make sure no one else did. Looks like HF for sure.
Lisa Lampanelli off her meds.
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you is chipmunkin times all up in my face and i hate that, you trampy nut gathering woodland creature. (LoLo)
Submitted by gia on Tue, 11/18/2008 - 4:17pm.
that maria person is actually a woman & NOT a drag queen??? how is that possible?
**
I was thinking the Very Same Exact Thing
-☮'---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮-
When you can't lie to yourself, that's depressing.
that maria person is actually a woman & NOT a drag queen??? how is that possible?
Can you imagine what Maria looks like first thing in the morning? gives a whole new meaning to morning sickness!
His favorite curse word is "bullshit."
His favorite food is sushi.
-☮'---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮-
When you can't lie to yourself, that's depressing.
LOL I thought her necklace said "vomit" at first glance.
On the other side of the coin, Hugh Jackman's tragic wife showed up to the premiere looking like a low-rent vintage Phyllis Diller impersonator. She's no Maria Venuti.
**
Maria is the one who looks like Phyllis Diller.
-☮'---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮-
When you can't lie to yourself, that's depressing.
Submitted by ImpertinentVixen on Tue, 11/18/2008 - 3:30pm.
How many emus died for that boa?
*
well it's not as if the flesh went to waste!
+~~~+~~~+~~~+~~~+~~~+~~~+~~~+~~~+
"I'd have sex with a number of the Muppets. I just don't talk about it publicly." - Mandy Patinkin
"her make-up looks like it was done by a group of slow clowns while they all jumped on a trampoline together"
^^Choking on my tea here
Hugh Jackman is either gay, or the most enlightened man in the universe
Submitted by LOVE CARROTTOP on Tue, 11/18/2008 - 3:13pm.
Submitted by oklahoma on Tue, 11/18/2008 - 3:01pm.
LCT!! Hey baby mama! How's the dangle today? left, right? Do you like how I put that you are a mama, and have a dangle in the same sentence?
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It's in my pantleg and it's squished!
That depends..... whose baby mama am I?
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That reminds me of when me and my sister & her kids went to the Lake in Oklahoma this past year, we taught them how to eat on the lake, like buy hotdogs & bread from the store and Voila! but my sister put a piece of bread around a hotdog really hard, and squished it.. It looked soo gross, like a squished up dong would in a pants leg!! That's how we'd eat on the lake after being out there all day in the summer as kids..
And you MY baby mama!
Hugh's wife needs to get to Nicole's surgeon stat.
my mom is around her "age" and I would guess Mother to be at least ten years younger than the beard.
Moisturize moisturize moisturize people
Slather, salp it up, flip it rub it down you know?
It puts the lotion on its skin or it ages years again.
science!
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We is tailing jokes in hair twoday!
Submitted by snowpiece on Tue, 11/18/2008 - 2:39pm.
John Palermo:
http://www.unclebarky.com/reviews_files/page3_blog_entry274_1.jpg
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SNOW!! you're like the Pepper Anderson of this shit girl! Oh and there is no way in old hag's hell that woman Deb is 48. 58 yes maybe, 48 yeah riiiiiiiiight.
How many emus died for that boa?
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Sweet barbecued Jesus with a side of cole slaw, I'm this close to just rolling down the subway stairs and out onto the third rail. - Jan_In_The_Pan
Mario Venuti, a 'unique' personality - and one of great natural beauty and charisma. Combined with a dynamic wig brushing and lippy applying – these traits have made his career as a performer, karaoke singer and transsexual highly successful. As one of this country’s leading trannies, Mario has played in every major cabaret venue around the local mall, the bingo place, the Drive Tru, as well as entertaining our ‘boys’ in the gay bar."
* SAVE THE FORESTS, EAT MORE BEAVERS!!!*
Submitted by Clarisse on Tue, 11/18/2008 - 3:15pm.
LCT,
You were making out with Christian Bale, but it was really me on the inside? That's HAWT right!?!?!
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Yes. It's like getting a scoop of ice cream, and finding out there's a fudge brownie inside, or other way around. Or like finding a $10 bill in a poop! Oh wait, that's not right, he doesn't look like poo... you get the idea.
Hm, no, this can't be right. I almost could buy it if it weren't for the boa. Trying too hard to distract us or something. This is just some advanced beardery trick. There's just no way that bitch thinks she looks good. Stupid lying whores.
LCT,
You were making out with Christian Bale, but it was really me on the inside? That's HAWT right!?!?!
KD,
No, i don't mean PDA's...bah...nevermind...it isn't that important to me anyhoo. =)
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Twinkle twinkle, little bat
How I wonder what you're at
Submitted by Green Is Good on Tue, 11/18/2008 - 2:49pm.
I'm OK with them sleeping together. I'm envious of them "sleeping" [;)] together.
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Do not mess with live dragons. You are crunchy and taste good with catsup.
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Submitted by oklahoma on Tue, 11/18/2008 - 3:01pm.
LCT!! Hey baby mama! How's the dangle today? left, right? Do you like how I put that you are a mama, and have a dangle in the same sentence?
----------------------------------
It's in my pantleg and it's squished!
That depends..... whose baby mama am I?
Submitted by Clarisse on Tue, 11/18/2008 - 2:59pm.
Carrottop!!!
How's it hanging you sexy thang!?!?!?!
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Clarissalina, I had a dream about you last night, only you were Christian Bale and we made out. I understand if we can't be friends anymore, but I'd really like it if we could try to get past this.
I had to watch everything Maria Venuti during lunch on YouTube - would be nice as one of Australia's "leading performers" there was something more than 30 seconds recorded 2-or-3 videos with a cell phone. She must have a good legal team like America's Phoebe Price that keep all her copyrighted masterful work off the internet and out of the public eye.
Clarisse- When my BF and I are in public, we don't show much chimistry either. That doesn't mean it's not there ever!
LCT!! Hey baby mama! How's the dangle today? left, right? Do you like how I put that you are a mama, and have a dangle in the same sentence?
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Take that dick off your shoulder and put it in your mouf. Drink the evidence and hide the dick behind your head! The police is comin!
Carrottop!!!
How's it hanging you sexy thang!?!?!?!
El B,
All snide aside, I do not think she looks bad. I just hate the Hollywood beard thing.
I think he adores his wife, but there is no sexual chemistry there. (from interviews n'such)
There is sexual chemistry between Hugh and his assistant...
http://www.dlisted.com/node/29306/images/spl61767_026.jpg
http://www.unclebarky.com/reviews_files/page3_blog_entry274_1.jpg
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Twinkle twinkle, little bat
How I wonder what you're at
Clarisse: I am on the case!
****************************1/20/09
"This is MK. He started it" angel_i
HeeeelLLooooo my sessy beeshes!!!
I normally snide all out on the wives of celebs, but this time i dont get it! I think she looks really nice. Damn, shes only 48 to his 40!!
Also, he was in the same show as her when she was 35, thats how they met. SHE was well known then, he wasnt!
Shit, i'm getting too nice for this site!! :o)
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If I were Achilles I would put my foot in a f**k off block of concrete!
@Mrsgosling.. OMG TheNotebook came on this weekend, oh it was soo nice seeing it again. I love that movie Sooo much! I said i love it!
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Take that dick off your shoulder and put it in your mouf. Drink the evidence and hide the dick behind your head! The police is comin!
Snowy!
Come on! This story is just writting itself!!!
John Palmero = HOT long time assistant
Deb = frumpy mother hen
Look at Hugh side-eyeing him!! Eat EM UP!!!
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Twinkle twinkle, little bat
How I wonder what you're at