Two Reality Show Drunks Arrested
This past weekend, two reality show dick bags found themselves in handcuffs after acting the fool at two different bars. First up we have Ace from "Survivor Gabon."
Ace Gordon was voted off to jail on early Sunday morning for getting into a drunken fight at a bar which ended in him hitting a woman and fighting with the cops. So he's a dick off-screen as well as on!
It all started at a bar in Naples, FL where Ace was thrown out of for being a grouchy drunk and getting violent with a chick. The cops were called to take him off to the slammer. Ace resisted arrest and told them he was "famous." Yeah, because that always works. Ace was released later in the day.
I want to slap myself in the nuts for having a crush on Ace. I know, I know. While everyone was off slobbering over Marcus' floppy peen, I was secretly getting tingly in the private area over Ace and his giant dwarf-looking head. I always get the sexy feeling for the dick bags who can't hold their liquor!
Now on to Mary Delgado! On the sixth season of "The Bachelor," Byron picked Mary and the two went off to live in dysfunctional hell. Mary is sort of known for boozing and brawling. She was already busted a while ago for punching Byron in the face. Well, TMZ says she was back behind bars on Saturday for getting tanked and acting like a bitch at Lorina's Cantina in Del Rio, Texas.
The bar called the police because Mary would not leave. She told them it was her "constitutional right" to be there. I love that shit!!!! That's the fucking best excuse ever. I learn all the good shit from reality stars. The next time a bartender complains that I'm too drunk, I'm going to say, "I've never been drunk in my life. I'm a businesswoman. Furthermore, it is my constitutional right to be there."
You have to fight for your constitutional right to paaaaaaartay!
When the cops arrived, Mary became even more annoying. She was thrown into a cop car, which didn't have a backseat cage, and started kicking at the radio. Maybe she didn't like the song that was playing?
Mary was later bailed out of the clink by her battered boyfriend Byron.
You know, Mary needs to leave Byron and become the next "Bachelorette." This kind of drunk ass behavior needs to be documented on a reality TV show. Shame on Mary for doing this shit without cameras rolling!
This post is poetic. That's all.
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JUST ONE OF THE SAME FUCKED UP BUNCH POSTING AT ALL HOURS.
My 'douche-dar' was off the charts with Ace.
He reminds me of those con-men that 60 minutes has to chase down.
Cheers.
That whore Ace rocks a big Alcoholics Anonymous symbol tatto on his arm.
And he's out being all drunk and stuff?
Idiot.
Submitted by putsomestankonit on Mon, 11/17/2008 - 5:20pm.
Submitted by Sheeps on Mon, 11/17/2008 - 5:12pm.
Submitted by islandgirl on Mon, 11/17/2008 - 4:15pm.
Del Rio is across the Rio Grande from Nuevo Laredo, Mexico.
Also a wild west town.
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TMZ says she was back behind bars on Saturday for getting tanked and acting like a bitch at Lorina's Cantina in Del Rio, Texas.--MK
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Anybody else besides Mary and me ever been to Del Rio?
That is one rough ass bordertown, hours from any real civilization.
I mean, it is damm rough.
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"You greasy bastid!"--Biggie Shortie aka Wanda
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kpZtL6rCeGY
"I have never done drugs in my life. I am a businesswoman." ---HS Lisa Wu.
Thanks, guys. *crosses Del Rio off list of 'must see' places in Texas, tries to figure out a way to break it to the hub* :0)
Submitted by Sheeps on Mon, 11/17/2008 - 5:12pm.
Submitted by islandgirl on Mon, 11/17/2008 - 4:15pm.
Isn't Del Rio a stone's throw from a place in Mexico where they do the donkey shows?
According to my friend, Yes! But they water the drinks, he and/or she says.
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I thought that Playboy did a lengthy article that the donkey shows were just scams to defraud tourists out of their money. Taxi drivers ask Americans or other travellers if they want to see a real live Mexican donkey show. They then drive them all over the back roads of Mexico looking for one running up the meter. But they never do find one and the sucker is left with a huge tab.
On that note driving into NYC for a class trip there was this huge sign with a woman and a horse and the sign read "Horse Shows". I of course knew what this meant and was trying to keep from vomitting. Some perv in the back screamed out "Hey look everyone they have horse shows here!" everyone started to laugh while the teacher tried to shut him up. This was three weeks after the first WTC bombing. Damn I'm old.
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Submitted by islandgirl on Mon, 11/17/2008 - 4:15pm.
Isn't Del Rio a stone's throw from a place in Mexico where they do the donkey shows?
According to my friend, Yes! But they water the drinks, he and/or she says.
Submitted by islandgirl on Mon, 11/17/2008 - 4:15pm.
Isn't Del Rio a stone's throw from a place in Mexico where they do the donkey shows? Just something I heard in the line at the grocery store the other day. :o)
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'Tis true, Islandgirl, such a show does exist. I was not brave enough to see it though, but I know folks who have. Yikes!
Isn't Del Rio a stone's throw from a place in Mexico where they do the donkey shows? Just something I heard in the line at the grocery store the other day. :o)
Submitted by Sheeps on Mon, 11/17/2008 - 4:09pm
I want to go visit people!
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We is tailing jokes in hair twoday!
Submitted by LoLo on Mon, 11/17/2008 - 4:06pm.
Her name's Del Rio and she dances on the bar
hahahahaha.
Dang, you guys make it sound better and better. And I can visit Nitty!
Her name's Del Rio and she dances on the bar
They tried to send her home
but instead she took a stand
Oh Rio Rio Del youre near the Rio Grande
Oh Rio Rio your face is busted like Shauna Sands
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We is tailing jokes in hair twoday!
I'm going to say, "I've never been drunk in my life. I'm a businesswoman. Furthermore, it is my constitutional right to be there."
You got to add "Google me, you dumb fuck".
I recall my husband going to Del Rio with some business associates on a hunting trip. All I know is that he never hunted again afterwards.
Best thing in Del Rio was the country fried steak w/gravy.
But leave the town as soon as you are done with your meal.
Del Rio, Texas, uhm...
That place is less than five miles from the Mexican border, and once and only once while I lived in San Antonio did I go there on a whim, flight of fancy (hah!), or perhaps just temporary insanity.
There was nothing to see or do in that town. Absolutely nothing, but drink the day away. I kinda feel bad for folks who live there because I have roamed the country, love little towns and such but this place was a bit scary, like a woman can disappear and nobody would know scary.
Del Rio? no wonder she didn't want to leave the bar, ugh.
Lorina's Cantina in Del Rio, Texas sounds like my kind of bar.
You mean, punching douchebags is illegal? I guess that's to be expected since everything that's fun is illegal.
I would name my kid byron if i wanted him to get beaten up all the time for me breast feeding him before gym class.
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We is tailing jokes in hair twoday!
These reality shows need to go. Like STAT!
Why is that dumbfudge Byron still with that nasty cunt?? The world may never now . . .
Oh, and I never even heard of Ace, but he must be such a lovely gentleman.
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It's creamie, not prune!!!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hQbwt-dicpo
who follows this shit ? Wasn't Mary a leftover from another season... a retread? Byron or what ever his name is should have know better she prolly has MPD ...
MK, no. What is happening to you? What was it the other day? O yes - you were walking around with 3 meals on your shirt and Amy made you feel better. That's your first problem right there. Stop looking at these people. Go look at some nice people. You need some nice people in your life.
OMG I so know that's gonna come out of my mouth someday when I'm drunk. "I do not get drunk. I am a business woman. Furthermore, it is my constitutional right to be a whore." ;p (just KIDDING! - mebbe)
♥ ThreadKilla!
A DListed Chola Diary , Lean Like a Chola
It's Britney, Bitch!<
I was so happy when crusty Ace got voted off, as well as floppy Marcus.
Ditto on the Kenny crush.
MK, I'm glad I have a crush on Kenny, LOL
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"This is MK. He started it" angel_i
this guys face looks like something that fucker on the caption this contest would crap out of his flaming ass.
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We is tailing jokes in hair twoday!
Ace is a douche royal. Hitting a woman? Classy.
Thank God he didn't win that million dollars.
What a fuck wad.
Oh MK nooooo! Ace is a giant nastyass douchebag!
"GOOGLE ME YOU DUMB FUCK"
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"This is MK. He started it" angel_i
zzzzzzzzzzz
cameras and bad drunks do not mix.
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"You never ask a Navy man if he'll have another drink, because it's nobody's goddamned business how much he's had already!"
Suddenly I'm reminded why I shut off my cable.
I had a dog named Ace as a wee lass.
I have no clue who either one of these witless wonders are.
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To me, you are a slug in the sun. You are an ant in the afterbirth.
MK, your fucking online dating spammers are back.
on topic, I got shit. I refuse to watch ninety five percent of what's on TV these days.
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"I'm pretty sure I asked you to pick up some Pecan Sandies."
Fuck, I forgot "I'm a business woman" and typed too fast before I saw "it's my consitutional right! AWESOME!
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Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...
Oooh, add "I'm famous" to my list of excuses...There's "not my pants", "the black kid did it", "researching a role"...did I miss one? Oh, yes, "Do you know who I am?"...Still feel I'm coming up short... Well, it all ends with "I'm famous", no?
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Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...
(twiddling thumbs) I be ready for Caption This.
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Sitting it out, spinning the dial
Thinking about the chump I've been
I have to smile,didn't I know Easy Come, Easy Go!
Ace? His real name should be ass. Wish he would get a life sentence just for being a douche!
hahahahhahah fucking Ace, come on MK, I thought I was going to have a crush on him too until I realized what an ENORMOUS douche he was with that fake British accent.
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"This is MK. He started it" angel_i