Queen Aretha Is The Greatest Singer Of All-Time!
Rolling Stone has come out with their 100 Greatest Singers Of All-Time list and Celine Dion isn't even on it! She is the "greatest singa in da wooorld!!!" She's going to take a kayak over to Rolling Stone and beat them with her elbow bone. Celine didn't make the list, but Queen Aretha Franklin and her magnificent titty balls of destruction landed on #1!! Rolling Stone really had no choice. Queen Aretha threatened to eat their whole building if they didn't make her #1. They know she was serious. She had the Thousand Island dressing with her, ready to go.
I pity the 99 fools below Aretha on this list. They are fucking holding on for dear life with Aretha on top of them. They are trying to get strength from their fucking toenails. Aretha's just sitting up top like the queen she is, picking her teeth and flexing her chichis.
I'm sure you'll rip apart the rest of the list like I already have. I mean, no Chloe Lattanzi?! No Kim from "The Real Housewives of Atlanta"? No The Hoff?! I just have 4 letters for this list: F-A-L-E! I'm joking! I know how to spell fale. Wait. How do you spell it? Stop! Let's get to business!
The full list after the jump. JUMP!!!
100 Mary J. Blige
99 Steven Tyler
98 Stevie Nicks
97 Joe Cocker
96 B.B. King
95 Patti LaBelle
94 Karen Carpenter
93 Annie Lennox
92 Morrissey
91 Levon Helm
90 The Everly Brothers
89 Solomon Burke
88 Willie Nelson
87 Don Henley
86 Art Garfunkel
85 Sam Moore
84 Darlene Love
83 Patti Smith
82 Tom Waits
81 John Lee Hooker
80 Frankie Valli
79 Mariah Carey
78 Sly Stone
77 Merle Haggard
76 Steve Perry
75 Iggy Pop
74 James Taylor
73 Dolly Parton
72 John Fogerty
71 Toots Hibbert
70 Gregg Allman
69 Ronnie Spector
68 Wilson Pickett
67 Jerry Lee Lewis
66 Thom Yorke
65 David Ruffin
64 Axl Rose
63 Dion (not Celine)
62 Lou Reed
61 Roger Daltrey
60 Björk
59 Rod Stewart
58 Christina Aguilera
57 Eric Bourdon
56 Mavis Staples
55 Paul Rodgers
54 Luther Vandross
53 Muddy Waters
52 Brian Wilson
51 Gladys Knight
50 Bonnie Raitt
49 Donny Hathaway
48 Buddy Holly
47 Jim Morrison
46 Patsy Cline
45 Kurt Cobain
44 Bobby "Blue" Bland
43 George Jones
42 Joni Mitchell
41 Chuck Berry
40 Curtis Mayfield
39 Jeff Buckley
38 Elton John
37 Neil Young
36 Bruce Springsteen
35 Dusty Sprinfield
34 Whitney Houston
33 Steve Winwood
32 Bono
31 Howlin' Wolf
30 Prince
29 Nina Simone
28 Janis Joplin
27 Hank Williams
26 Jackie Wilson
25 Michael Jackson
24 Van Morrison
23 David Bowie
22 Etta James
21 Johnny Cash
20 Smokey Robinson
19 Bob Marley
18 Freddie Mercury
17 Tina Turner
16 Mick Jagger
15 Robert Plant
14 Al Green
13 Roy Orbison
12 Little Richard
11 Paul McCartney
10 James Brown
09 Stevie Wonder
08 Otis Redding
07 Bob Dylan
06 Marvin Gaye
05 John Lennon
04 Sam Cooke
03 Elvis Presley
02 Ray Charles
01 Aretha Franklin
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Hey I was here, observing the banter to and fro over the border.
Baldwin is a cocksucker. In other words, he would rather move to Canada than live in the USA under Obama. Who TF does he think he is? And he isn't intelligent enough to be funny.
I FART IN HIS GENERAL DIRECTION!
I also snagged on this yesterday on the Aussie www.news.com.au site.
"As Canadian as possible under the circumstances"
http://blogs.news.com.au/news/yoursay/index.php/news/comments/aussie_tra...
Night TV! Sweet dreams of Amy. *yes, yes, yes*
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Guess what. I got a fever and the only prescription is more cowbell.
Submitted by TITS on Thu, 11/13/2008 - 3:10am.
Fight?! Awesome. I get it. US/Canada is like Aus/NZ fightin.
I hope you threw some shit! Have LOTS of reading to do. I hope you told em all born again right wing loons belong in New Zealand, not Canada. Hehe. Nighty night ho!
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Guess what. I got a fever and the only prescription is more cowbell.
This list was compiled by Rolling Stone, and they stopped being relevant about 1974, so I'm surprised that the lead singer for Foghat didn't top the list.
On that note, I'm apparently the last American with a job, so I better go rest up so I can stimulate the economy. Nite, 2 cents and TITS
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I am the devil, and I am here to do the devil's work.
Are these ranked in order of greatness or just listed? Because some of those should be moved around.
night!
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"I'd have sex with a number of the Muppets. I just don't talk about it publicly." - Mandy Patinkin
Submitted by Team Valtrex on Thu, 11/13/2008 - 3:05am.
Submitted by MyTwoCents on Thu, 11/13/2008 - 3:03am.
I have my mom's eyes and my dad's assless leather pants.
.......
OMG! I think we're related.
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Guess what. I got a fever and the only prescription is more cowbell.
2c one of the baldwins - the born again right wing loon threatened to move to canada if obama won. (they all do that) Mk posted, why was he still there?
Mud was slung back and forth across the border. We fight, make up, then fight some more.
We're the NZ to the usa's oz.
the funniest part was how most canadian insults contained apologies.
I thought you weren't supposed to drink in the heat. oh wait (slap) look who I'm talking to!
I hate the heat. anything over 77 Fahrenheit makes my life a misery.
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"I'd have sex with a number of the Muppets. I just don't talk about it publicly." - Mandy Patinkin
Submitted by MyTwoCents on Thu, 11/13/2008 - 3:03am.
I have my mom's eyes and my dad's assless leather pants.
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I am the devil, and I am here to do the devil's work.
Submitted by TITS on Thu, 11/13/2008 - 2:49am.
Hey!! Where the hell were you canuck loving aussies last night? We were riffing on the baldwin thread.
....
Was hot as hell here yesterday. 35 degrees (that's Aussie for f*cking hot). Went out drinkin!!!!! Was too pissed to read :) I really tried to, but the puter screen kept moving around! What happened at the Baldwin thread? Fill me in and I'll read it later.
And TV...Police Academy!! I knew I wasn't making it up. BTW your Dad was HAWT!!! Any family resemblences?
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Guess what. I got a fever and the only prescription is more cowbell.
Submitted by TITS on Thu, 11/13/2008 - 2:47am.
2c - drunken episodes are often misconstrued as movie memories.
Kissy kissy
....
Like the scene from that movie where James Haven has his wicked way with... nevermind.
OMG TV you are seriously asking for an ass kicking. Do you want me to get out the belt? DO YA??? No...I know what'll hurt more:
http://au.youtube.com/watch?v=LD5sahXoj0U
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Guess what. I got a fever and the only prescription is more cowbell.
Submitted by MyTwoCents on Thu, 11/13/2008 - 2:42am.
The Blue Oyster Bar was in Police Academy. That was my dad in the biker gear.
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I am the devil, and I am here to do the devil's work.
Hey!! Where the hell were you canuck loving aussies last night? We were riffing on the baldwin thread.
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"I'd have sex with a number of the Muppets. I just don't talk about it publicly." - Mandy Patinkin
Submitted by MyTwoCents on Thu, 11/13/2008 - 2:40am.
Seriously, if I wash down Taco Bell with Coors Light, my rectum can carry a tune better and hit more octaves than Amy Winehouse. Rectum? Damn near killed 'em.
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I am the devil, and I am here to do the devil's work.
2c - drunken episodes are often misconstrued as movie memories.
Kissy kissy
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"I'd have sex with a number of the Muppets. I just don't talk about it publicly." - Mandy Patinkin
Speaking of Muppets and shirley...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CJziWWuc5EM
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"I'd have sex with a number of the Muppets. I just don't talk about it publicly." - Mandy Patinkin
Submitted by TITS on Thu, 11/13/2008 - 2:33am.
full vid of snl cowbell w/will f
http://www.metacafe.com/watch/1738696/snl_cowbell/
...........
Heya TITS! Watching now... wasn't there a Blue Oyster Bar in a movie? I know I'm gonna kick myself, but I can't remember. Anyone?
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*throws drinky at TV's head while he's not looking*
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Submitted by Team Valtrex on Thu, 11/13/2008 - 2:33am.
HAHAHA!!! You better duck.
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Submitted by Team Valtrex on Thu, 11/13/2008 - 1:02am.
Where are all the influential women in music now...
*********
Rehab? no,no,no.
........
Seeriously. And islandgirl: oxoxo back atcha Girl!
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Submitted by MyTwoCents on Thu, 11/13/2008 - 2:22am.
Winehouse? for real? What about Taylor Swift or Jessica Simpson or William Hung? Winehouse isn't even a talented crackhead, the one on my street corner can at least dance.
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I am the devil, and I am here to do the devil's work.
full vid of snl cowbell w/will f
http://www.metacafe.com/watch/1738696/snl_cowbell/
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"I'd have sex with a number of the Muppets. I just don't talk about it publicly." - Mandy Patinkin
And seriously, Wyle E...Ella Fitzgerald and Billy Holliday. It's a travesty. A travesty I tells ya.
Is it just me or is this list missing some W.I.N.E.H.O.U.S.E.
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Submitted by Sandbitch on Thu, 11/13/2008 - 2:14am.
Yes... I see your hand, but...sorry, Winehouse trumps Bassey for me. DAE is gonna be stoked about Xtina. I'm pretty stoked for her too. Not many under 30's on the list. Hey, where's JT? RECOUNT!!!
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Guess what. I got a fever and the only prescription is more cowbell.
Submitted by MyTwoCents on Thu, 11/13/2008 - 2:16am.
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xoxox, that's all I can manage.
Shirley Bassey/Propellerheads....
Too fucking good.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6UMpjpuVors
Hey Islandgirl! I thought you were asking about the cowbell too. Just noticed you posted the link :/
I'm so bookmarking this!
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DAE doesn't even know yet that Xtina made the list...
Submitted by MyTwoCents on Thu, 11/13/2008 - 2:06am.
This list definitely has some legends but there are a few there I've never heard of. Where's Winehouse? I want a recount!!
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I demanded a recount already for the lack of Shirley Bassey. GOLDFINGAAAAAAA! So I'll see your scabby Winehouse and up you a Shirley Bassey.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=51Wg6k9cWhM
Submitted by Sandbitch on Thu, 11/13/2008 - 2:00am.
FUCKING AWESOME!!!! I gotta have more cowbell! HAHAHA! I freekin love Will Ferrel!! AND Christopher Walken! OMG...too awesome.
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@2C - COWBELL!
Submitted by DUDE on Thu, 11/13/2008 - 12:24am.
bambam-Here ya go
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fZOHY7Z5eaQ
the DUDE! abides...
Hiya Tits. Going to bed now, just wanted to say 'hi'.
Cowbells?
Wyle E, I'll have some of what you're havin!
This list definitely has some legends but there are a few there I've never heard of. Where's Winehouse? I want a recount!!
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Cowbell...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fZOHY7Z5eaQ
Submitted by Wyle E on Thu, 11/13/2008 - 2:00am.
That's pretty funny!
When did you figure out that Aretha isn't 1?
sorry i kid.
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"I'd have sex with a number of the Muppets. I just don't talk about it publicly." - Mandy Patinkin
Where the hell are Ella Fitzgerald and Billy Holliday?
(I'm pretty sure it SHOULD be their birthday's as well. Can't take this list seriously now.)
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Wyle E Coyote
'Forgive me chickens, for I have sinned.'
Submitted by MyTwoCents on Thu, 11/13/2008 - 1:45am.
Submitted by Sandbitch on Thu, 11/13/2008 - 1:42am.
You got some catchin' up ta do 2c!
....
You ain't kiddin. Can you fill me in? What'd I miss!!!!! This is how far I've got so far:
K, here's a quick round up. We've come to the conclusion that this list is a crock of shite. There has been OUTRAGE I tell you.
Hence, peeps have posted some serious ball knocking songs to prove one and all's point. However, you must see the Cowbell clip. I shall try and locate.
LMTO
FUCK I'm stupid. I didn't read the post properly and when I saw a list I thought it was the list of BIRTHDAYS. Yeah - chat about ESE's birthday took me further down the wrong track.
I was having these wtf moments...
1. wtf? That is the longest list of fucking birthday's EVAH!
2. wtf? Mariah, Whitney Houston and Elvis were all BORN ONE THE SAME DAY! NO FUCKING WAY! That CAN'T be right!
MK's fucking LOST IT!
Still giggling...
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Wyle E Coyote
'Forgive me chickens, for I have sinned.'
Submitted by Sandbitch on Thu, 11/13/2008 - 1:51am.
AAwww. I'm gonna be here for the next couple of hours catching up on the last few days of posts! I catch ya later.
LoOOOvvve the PP.
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Happy Birthday ESE!
LIVE IT UP!!!
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Wyle E Coyote
'Forgive me chickens, for I have sinned.'
ha! It's a goody of Jennay, ain't it! Actually, I was about to hit the pillow...
happy birthday ESE (us Scorps rule!!!) *muah*
ontop: this list blows worse than Kim Kardashian
funny the only thing I DO concur is with Aretha as #1!
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I smacked a bitch and I liked it.
What matter Sandbitch? There is a distinct disgruntled vibe coming from ya.
TEAM MANISTON!!!
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ugh i can smell her from my screen
Submitted by Sandbitch on Thu, 11/13/2008 - 1:42am.
You got some catchin' up ta do 2c!
....
You ain't kiddin. Can you fill me in? What'd I miss!!!!! This is how far I've got so far:
For five long years
I thought you were my man
But I found out, I'm just a link in your chain
Chain, chain, chain....
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You got some catchin' up ta do 2c!
Ig,
Ah yes, those were the days. Did anyone hear the news that the Archies are making a comeback? Seriously.Those guys are all great but they can't hold a candle to these guys;
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g2se2I70CJ0&feature=related
gnite all.
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=41APzy5kqBU
Hey y'all :)
Why the hell isn't Winehouse on this list!
Happy B'day ESE!! *Smooches and a little feel of yo ass*
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Me too, kiddies. Sleep tight.
♥ ThreadKilla!
A DListed Chola Diary , Lean Like a Chola
Ice Baby Hands
drive by thank you all!! and gratuitous WOO-HOO!!
mixin' the next drink and gettin'... er... umm... snuggled!!
catch ya all later!!
OT: come on! nope!
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"We play the game,
with the bravery of being out of range."