The Twin Messiahs Are "Smiley"
Today was a holy day in Hollywood and not because it's Sunday, but because Saint Morticia graced it with her heavenly presence at the DVD launch for "Kung Fu Panda" at Grauman's Chinese Theatre. The drug dealers, roaches and hookers of Hollywood took the day off, because even they can't commit sin when a deity is in their midst.
Saint Morticia was kind enough to speak about her four-month-old twin chosen ones to People. Traffic stopped and a hush went over Hollywood Blvd. while Saint Morticia spoke, "They're great. They're still so little, but they do have their own personalities. They're at that stage where their personality really starts to shine."
Um...everything about them shines, because there's a bright ass halo always hovering around their golden heads. They need to be a damn dimmer on that shit! Maddox has to wear a sleeping mask, because it's so fucking bright. RUDE.
Saint Morticia also said the twin messiahs are getting very "smiley." DUH! Of course, they're "smiley." They're smiling because they already know they can end us all in one burp! Also, when they fart, shiny crystal bubbles come out. Babies like shiny things. Even god babies.
Here's Saint Morticia looking extra Morticia-ey with Jack Black, his mega gas belly and that sexy piece of sun-dried tomato Dustin Hoffman.
Splash, Bauer Griffin, Wenn, Wireimage
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Submitted by ClooneyisMahBoo on Mon, 11/10/2008 - 1:26am.
I dont get it with her. I dont think she's a dog, but I dont get the whole "sexiest woman" thing. I think she has a giant lollipop head. And I dont know who said it, but you dont go from vials of blood and frenching your brother to a patron saint overnight. Crazy don't fade that fast.
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"A giant lollipop head" Blahhh haha that was a good one!!
Oh yeah i really liked her then . And I always found billy bob to be kinda hot.
hhmmm, lemme see.. there's pictures of Dustin Hoffman(great actor), pictures of Jack Black(meh), pictures of a giant panda(got nothin' against that).... wait, wait!.... this is an AJ thread!... nope, not touchin' it!
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"We play the game,
with the bravery of being out of range."
She looks pretty bad in these photos.I see plenty of wrinkles and some grey hair.She is just so plain and boring now.I really preferred the blood drinking crazy she used to be.
Between two evils, I always pick the one I never tried before.
I dunno someone has to be the sexiest, but to me there are way too many sexy people to narrow it to one sexiest. And I've seen Angelina SOOOO MUCH that I could live without seeing her ever again. I don't know why some people haven't had their fill of her either. BTW, I liked Angelina better as a blonde (Girl Interrupted), but I think i'm about the only one.
I dont get it with her. I dont think she's a dog, but I dont get the whole "sexiest woman" thing. I think she has a giant lollipop head. And I dont know who said it, but you dont go from vials of blood and frenching your brother to a patron saint overnight. Crazy don't fade that fast.
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When you're driving down the street with your hook hand and its shininess reflects off the sun and temporarily blinds you, causing you to crash into a tree, you'll think of Monifa.
~M.K.
Forget all this plastic surgery, I have a nose hollywood would hate, it's a normal nose but big by their standards, i love my nose though. No way if I was an actress would they get me to change it. I don't care what they said. My luck My nose would end up like paris's. I saw her sister's nose recently and her nose looks untouched. Good for her (I think)
I wonder what the venerable Mr. Dustin Hoffman thought about working with these two asshats? Seriously, there is no comparison.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6vPJKtwC9JI
Edit! It reminded me of something, OK? I'm in a Garfunfel mood. He's a ginge!
BTW, it's so obvious to me now, that this woman has collagen injections often. Look at her lips. Obviously they are bigger than most of the average, but look how much smaller they look here. Someone else mentioned something about her lips. yeah they are bigger than like 80% or more of the population, but she gets them made bigger! I see it now! Unless i'm so used to them.
I hope Dustin didn't repeat what Clint said about working with Angelina, he'll be in for another divorce.
I definately see she isn't up to par but I just think that she's lucky that she still looks like that when she isn't her best is all. She usually looks better for sure.
I can see how she's starting to really age. Give her 5 years top and she'll officially be old.
As usual she looks incredibly sexy. How can you all say otherwise? I don't get it, she's absolutly stunning all the time. The woman cannot take a bad picture if her life depended on it. Not only that, but she's had kids, how many women can have children and have a body like that? Seriously, I don't know too many women that haven't gotten the hot sucked out of them after they have kids.
I was gonna say it's drugs cause look at this woman, she is a druggie by nature, just look at her, BUT, at the same time, look at her, she looks too good. Anorexics go forever looking good and then bam they look terrible. Drug addicts, from my experience, slowly start looking like shit. No really, she reminds me of the gothic type, with her black wearing and dying her hair black that's why i say look at her. But I think she had a drug problem too at one time. I know she used to cut herself. But I think it's food problems cause I have this suspicion Brad is that type that wouldn't allow drugs, I don't know why I think that, but I bet he is.
I don't think she's all that, but if this her looking like crap, i must say, I wish I looked this good looking like crap. But< i do not by any means think she is hot shit like everyone else. There are plenty of women that look good when they "look like crap" compared to looking their best.
Ah, back to the old days. Crazy can't hide for long.
The third thumbnail makes her face look very plastic....and what happened to the hemorrhoid lips?
Submitted by . on Sun, 11/09/2008 - 11:32pm.
LOL, yes that grumpy pussay is Atom, my friend's cat.
Submitted by Sibsi on Sun, 11/09/2008 - 11:33pm.
Yes of course you have hope lol. My sisters also sport the chiken legs. They hate mine coz , I have calf muscles thanks to the US Army and riding my bike everywhere.
I said that coz she is a Hollywood star and shouldn't be going out looking like hell warmed over. She looks kinda sick, should of sat this event out.
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VROOM VROOM
I'm a squirrel and that feels greaaaat!!
The dark hair and severe part are completely aging her. She looks like a hippie crossed with Lily Munster. She's a gorgeous woman when she has lighter brown hair with a side part.
I usually am sort of apathetic towards her and BP, but I'm getting sick of hearing about the kids. I just picture their house filled with steaming mounds of crappy diapers.
yay!Another oppurtunity to comment like a justjared angeloonie!
U R ALL JELLIS H8ERS!!!ANGIE IS NOT 2 THIN,SHE IS PURRRFECT!!!HER HUSBAND IS PROLLY AT HOME WITH THE KIDS COUNTING DOWN THE MINUTES UNTIL SHE GETS HOME!!!!OBAMA SHOULD HAVE PICKED HER AS HIS RUNNING MATE!!!!
(and for angel_i)JenniFRAUD IS YELLING INTO THE OCEAN AFTER LOOKING AT THESE GORGEOUS PICTURES!!!!!
She is a GD mess, and she looks like crap. There.........I said it..........anybody don't like it, TOUGH SHIT!!!!!!!
~~To achieve true happiness, find a cause bigger than yourself.....~~
~~Nothing screams "Haute Couture" like prison tattoos~~
Submitted by Tigerlilly on Mon, 11/10/2008 - 12:04am
You're my favorite Tiger! *snuggles*
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Clean this mess up else we'll all end up in jail!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ylr2D4Pwn58
I was in Manhattan today to see The Lion King (awesome!) and every magazine stand had In Touch(?) with Angie's picture claiming she's pregnant again. Do they think we are that stupid?
Seriously, though, where's Brad? Home with the kids? Is there something I missed while I was at work? What are the Loons saying?
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Clean this mess up else we'll all end up in jail!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ylr2D4Pwn58
Submitted by Snarkley on Mon, 11/10/2008 - 12:00am.
BTW, TigerLilly, not trying to steal your thunder, I change avatars all the time, I didn't realize how this one coincides w/yours.
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Ha! The more tigers the better! I say TIGER NATION! No, but I am a jelly h8er of your avie...TOO AWESOME!...
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Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...
Considering my name is Creepella, I shouldn't snark on Angelina but I will anyway - Why the hell is she always wearing black? It does nothing for her except make her look like she's an 80 year old in mourning.
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Bye! Good
Submitted by busybee on Sun, 11/09/2008 - 11:58pm.
Submitted by Snarkley on Sun, 11/09/2008 - 11:57pm.
Submitted by busybee on Sun, 11/09/2008 - 11:53pm.
That's GOT to be him in that blind item thing about the A-lister going to the bar by himself. Got to.
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As much as I would like to believe that it's Bradley, I really think its the Deppster...Sadness...
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Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...
BTW, TigerLilly, not trying to steal your thunder, I change avatars all the time, I didn't realize how this one coincides w/yours.
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Clean this mess up else we'll all end up in jail!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ylr2D4Pwn58
Submitted by Snarkley on Sun, 11/09/2008 - 11:57pm.
Submitted by busybee on Sun, 11/09/2008 - 11:53pm.
That's GOT to be him in that blind item thing about the A-lister going to the bar by himself. Got to.
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I figured it was either Brad, or Mel Gibson
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Busybeeblogger
Submitted by busybee on Sun, 11/09/2008 - 11:53pm.
That's GOT to be him in that blind item thing about the A-lister going to the bar by himself. Got to.
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Clean this mess up else we'll all end up in jail!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ylr2D4Pwn58
#6 thumbnail, I told you whores, that bitch never had good legs...Ho need some calf implants...I've always thought so, but to be fair, Jen need a chinoectomy...Yeah, it's time...
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Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...
Submitted by Snarkley on Sun, 11/09/2008 - 11:50pm.
I haven't read all the comments, but isn't it very obvious that Brad the ball-less is not there?
Isn't he supposed to be in germany filming?
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Busybeeblogger
I haven't read all the comments, but isn't it very obvious that Brad the ball-less is not there?
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Clean this mess up else we'll all end up in jail!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ylr2D4Pwn58
Submitted by Balenciaga Bitch on Sun, 11/09/2008
Ive always thought she has. It goes with her ways of thinking and her destructive ways that she has tried to mask by acting all "normal," but I guarantee she cannot shed her destructive side that quick, and she has many secrets....trust.
Yes! I completely agree! I'm neither an Angelina lover or hater. But I have always been suspicious of how quickly she switched from saving vials of billy bob's blood to all this earth mother crap. literally, i think it was like two months. Maybe I'm jaded (actually, there is no maybe about it), but it just seems weird to me.
Submitted by greenleafbella on Sun, 11/09/2008 - 11:35pm.
ughh i almost cant even look at her because of her weight. makes me sick to my tummy. she seriously needs like 10 lbs on her. eat some cake woman!! your so naturally skinny you can afford to!!!!!!!!!!!
eating disorder major. or drugs.
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Can you imagine crypt-creeper/mommie-dearest as a matriarchal figure? Madge and AJ for Veiniest, roid twat, freak-fucks evva.
ughh i almost cant even look at her because of her weight. makes me sick to my tummy. she seriously needs like 10 lbs on her. eat some cake woman!! your so naturally skinny you can afford to!!!!!!!!!!!
eating disorder major. or drugs.
Submitted by miso-horny on Sun, 11/09/2008 - 11:24pm.
Did she even try to get dressed for this event. Not that she had to wear a ballgown or anything, but damn. She looked she pulled this dress out of the hamper, then couldn't find her black shoes and said ''Fuck it ,these will do''threw on some eyeliner and lipstick in the car.
And those legs ain't helping. Chicken legs,zombie hands not a good combo.
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You just described my dressing routine, hah! I also got the chicken legs >< no zombie hand yet though, so maybe there's hope.
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My other gig
My other hangout
Submitted by miso-horny on Sun, 11/09/2008 - 11:25pm.
Hey, gorgeous. You are sporting one GRUMPY pussay. lol
AJ is one of those people that subtle plastic surgery works for. If you do minor tweaks you don't end up looking like a freak. Hey, I'm a poet and I know-it!
her upper face is very smooth. I am so positive she had botox around her eyes and forehead.
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*Power corrupts*Absolute power corrupts absolutely*
Submitted by angel_i on Sun, 11/09/2008 - 11:23pm.
Wait. Are we giving Angie cancer? No, no...give her something people can't yell at us about. Giv'er syphillis!
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I was asking about the face bumps/dots in thumbie #4, but a'ight, the syph it is, 'cause Paris has the cooch crabs too busy feasting on her 'gina gunk to squeeze Angie Jo's baster hole in their itinerary.
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OBAMALOONIE
@islandgirl
Long time no see muah!
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VROOM VROOM
I'm a squirrel and that feels greaaaat!!
Did she even try to get dressed for this event. Not that she had to wear a ballgown or anything, but damn. She looked she pulled this dress out of the hamper, then couldn't find her black shoes and said ''Fuck it ,these will do''threw on some eyeliner and lipstick in the car.
And those legs ain't helping. Chicken legs,zombie hands not a good combo.
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VROOM VROOM
I'm a squirrel and that feels greaaaat!!
Wait. Are we giving Angie cancer? No, no...give her something people can't yell at us about. Giv'er syphillis!
♥ ThreadKilla!
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miso, scroll down. xoxox
Submitted by LOVE CARROTTOP on Sun, 11/09/2008 - 9:51pm.
Submitted by Pearl_Necklace on Sun, 11/09/2008 - 9:45pm.
oooo! and don't wanna be nitpicky but -- oh who am I kidding, YES I DO -- but check out thumbie #4: what's up with the zit collection? Or are they baby melanomas?
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I'd bank on baby melanomas. They're not pustuous enough to be zits.
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"Pustuous"...lovin' and feelin' nauseous about that word at the same time :D
And yes, they are on the mole-side of bumpiness.
In other Angie Jo news, I keep catching the same tired Changeling trailer. They need to just.STOP: tired of seeing her beat her bony sternum and shriek "I WANT MAAAAH SON!!!' geese!
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OBAMALOONIE
I forget who is the D-slut that is gifted in Photoshop ,but I think it would be cool if someone made an avie of Boyfriend Arm Pillow replacing the girl on the pic with Jennifer Aniston. I would love to see that lol.
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VROOM VROOM
I'm a squirrel and that feels greaaaat!!
Submitted by islandgirl on Sun, 11/09/2008 - 11:02pm.
I know you're goofing, but I think I read in the past year that TB is on the rise again (esply among immigrants); it was so eradicated in the West that they stopped inoculating for it. Or maybe it was dengue fever.
Is Jack Black pregnant with twins? Also, all of that black (dress, hair) with funky light pink frost lipstick (hello 1987!) is not flattering on AngieJo, imho. Makes her look ghastly!
That said, "Kung Fu Panda" was freaking hilarious. SKADOOOOOOOOOOOOSH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1
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What in Sears Portrait Studio hell is this shit?! MK on Britney Spears' album "Circus"
Submitted by Sassy on Sun, 11/09/2008 - 10:58pm.
TITS, where do you download TB?
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TB?? Isn't that more or less under control?
Sorry, I am a literal arsehole. Literally.
Submitted by medicationlover on Sun, 11/09/2008 - 9:51pm.
i'm sorry, but you cannot tell me this woman doesn't have an eating disorder. she is so sickly thin.
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Ive always thought she has. It goes with her ways of thinking and her destructive ways that she has tried to mask by acting all "normal," but I guarantee she cannot shed her destructive side that quick, and she has many secrets....trust.
**She looks like a pure skankasswhoreslutskeezybitchhocumrag**
MK~ 07/01/08
okay she needs a stylist fast!
why doesn't her brother tell her the hair-do is just so tired already. so is the liquid eyeliner, naked lips.
i love her & think she needs an intervention - her hair makes her all forehead. it is really aging her.
i know having that many kids would make me look ragged but dang, how could she let those awesome features go to waste.
maybe a side bang, blending into some wisps on the side or a joan jet layer or something! the darker hair is fine, maybe not just so deep. like a chestnut brown or something more golden.
maybe something more natural for makeup. the liquid eyeliner is just too madonna & pamela anderson. angie has better features than both of them i am sure she looks great without makeup but let's remind her that her image has helped make her famous (and the fantasy of many) so let's just freshen it up.
i hope she doesn't ever get botox or work. all those hollywood types are starting to look alike with their fakeness. it also takes away from their craft (ya need facial expressions to act).