Jenny Needs To Step It Up
OMG! Jennifer Aniston is knocked up! With twins! And John Mayer is the daddy! Except there's an itty bitty problem. She's not exactly pregnant just yet.... Who cares about that! It's just petty details.
Star Magazine claims Jenny is "trying" to have a baby with John Mayer before her 40th birthday. Jen is trying all kinds of shit in order to get a baby in her busted ass oven. A source said, "She knows her baby-making years are limited. It's hard for her to think of anything else — she has babies on the brain!" I think the source was being literal. Jen is putting friend's babies on her head, hoping it will get her body in the baby mood and speed up the process.
One friend said that Jen and John are doing specific yoga poses that are supposed to help her get pregnant. Unless, they're doing the poses naked and on top of each other, I don't see how that shit can help.
The friend went on to blab, "Jen has also changed her diet. She's taking a lot of folic acid and has upped her intake of milk and beef — all of which are supposed to increase your chances of having twins. She's even eating cassava root, a wild yam, because women in Africa who consume it have the highest rate of conceived twins. "
JEN! Come on now. If you want to beat Saint Angie Jo, you're going to have to get knocked up with triplets at least! You know what you need to do? Go down and visit Michelle Duggar. Give her a gift certificate to WholesomeWear in exchange for a little vagina bumping time with her. Seriously. All you have to do is rub your snatch with hers and you'll instantly be pregnant with triplets or even quadruplets! Both you and John are "Js" and we know how Michelle feels about "Js." It's meant to be.
ShareThis
i wonder if Jen stopped smoking weed. I often think that's why I never got preggers.
Anyone have any info on that?
****************************1/20/09
"This is MK. He started it" angel_i
Submitted by putsomestankonit on November 5, 2008 - 1:14pm.
Charlie Sheen walks out on pregnant wife?!
It turns out he just went to the kitchen for a beer.
This is dumb...who would believe the Jennifer Aniston story? Now, the Hohan/JT story...that I believe.
Submitted by applehead on November 5, 2008 - 1:14pm.
I'm just curious, who buys these mags?
The women I work with.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
And you will believe in love
And all that it's supposed to be
Just until the fish start to smell
And you're struck down by a hammer
Oh, and you KNOW if any of this is true, she's GOBBLING hormone pills to make her ovulate like crazy. I don't buy this "all natural" approach, especially at her age, and considering her competition.
Charlie Sheen walks out on pregnant wife?! Did she catch him looking at pics of babies in diapers playing poker online?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
And you will believe in love
And all that it's supposed to be
Just until the fish start to smell
And you're struck down by a hammer
I'm just curious, who buys these mags?
The article says that John is preparing for parenthood by ordering parenting books on Amazon. You know, "Parenting for Douches."
UGH...please no more lame Jen and John pregnancy stories. So stupid!
^<>^<>^<>^<>^<>^<>^<>^<>^<>^<>^<>^<>^<>^<>^<>^
Friendship is like peeing on yourself: everyone can see it, but only you get the warm feeling that it brings.
Jeez. She needs to have quadruplets to even come CLOSE to Skeletina.
haha!! And JT & Lohan.. oooo big surprise there.. Gossip gossip gossip.. Feed me more gossip!!!
-----------------------------------
And I'm the one who loves you when You're fucking Dead!