All This Can Be Yours
Simon Cowell is back on the market after splitting up with his chick of six years, Terri Seymour. Simon's pr bitch said that Terri rang him up last month and let him know she was quitting that bitch. I'm sure he found comfort in between Ryan Gaycrest's throbbing butt cheeks.
Terri, 34, and Simon, 48, met when she was just 18, but they didn't start bumping titties until she interviewed him in 2002.
Simon's spokeswhore went on to tell People, "They are going to remain close friends. Simon thinks the world of Terri and that isn't going to change. He also understands her reason for ending it. In the past Terri has said that she wants kids but that just isn't Simon. Nobody else is involved, certainly not on Simon's side."
For why doesn't Simon want little babies? His voluptuous manchicis were made for milking.
Terri Seymour failed me just like Sarah Larson did. She had herself a big bag of money dangling in front of her and she just let it go. The gold diggers of the world are shedding millions of tears at this missed opportunity.
The Mirror claims Simon bought her ass a house as a goodbye gift, but that shit's not enough! She could have been set up for the rest of her days! I mean, Simon shits bars of gold, so Terri just needed to find a way to get knocked up! Homegirl should've gone through Gaycrest's garbage for used condoms filled with Simon's baby batter or something! Damn.
Image: Bauer Griffin
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MK don't leave us with this pic!!!!
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Submitted by MyTwoCents on November 1, 2008 - 6:07pm.
Personally, I'd say that's a pretty important skill.
Pfötchenstellung!
Submitted by jiggywiddit on November 1, 2008 - 5:53pm.
Check it: he's even advertising his skills in the photo above.
....
His only skill is dropping his girlfriends before they get their hands on his money.
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Hats. If I ever see a hat on a bed in this house, man, like you'll never see me again. I'm gone.
It's cold for Terry to break up with her pregnant
boyfriend.
He looks second trimester to me.
Poor thing.
Pfötchenstellung!
It's always upsetting when a long term relationship ends. But at the end of the day, I wish them both the best! Everyone deserves to have love in their life. Maybe later Simon will discover the joy of children.
upskt.com
Submitted by DreamyAguileraEyes on November 1, 2008 - 5:51pm.
All This Can Be Yours
Is that a promise?
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I wish I could say it's only a promise, babydoll but...uh...VOOJOO CURSE is more like it. Please don't say that aloud more than two times. lol
Check it: he's even advertising his skills in the photo above.
Plus, you can motorboat.
This dude has it all.
"It's too much to process."--MK
All This Can Be Yours
Is that a promise?
~♥~Keeps Gettin'Better ~ The Official Video ~ http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zASL04bgJ70 ~♥~
Submitted by . on November 1, 2008 - 5:28pm.
LOL. HAHA.
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Hats. If I ever see a hat on a bed in this house, man, like you'll never see me again. I'm gone.
I love Simon, imperfect body & bad attitude and all! I'll take it! He's hilarious.
Is it just me or does anyone else find it absolutely ridiculous that Terri is a talk-show correpsondent? I see her on "Extra" or whatever the fuck its called, and I am appallled at her voice..... its sooooo damn weak and scratchy and she just SOUNDS AWFUL. Obviously the only reason she gets these gigs is becuz of her relationship with Simon.
How hopefully she'll disappear.
Submitted by MyTwoCents on November 1, 2008 - 5:24pm.
I heard he came out...as a fully fledged fucktard.
*try saying 10 times quickly*
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Fully fledged fucktard
Fully fledged phlemtard
Fully phludged fugtard
Oh I give up.
Submitted by Madam Pince on November 1, 2008 - 5:21pm.
As vain as he is, I'm surprised Simon hasn't done something about the man-boobs.
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MP, he secretly plays with them and dresses them up in frilly bust accentuating frocks. He loves his tittays. He watches re-runs of AI while tweaking his nips. YOU KNOW it be TRUE.
Submitted by Madam Pince on November 1, 2008 - 5:21pm.
As vain as he is, I'm surprised Simon hasn't done something about the man-boobs.
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it's supposed to be very very painful to heal from that surgery... i just assume you're referring to the knife!
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Submitted by . on November 1, 2008 - 5:14pm.
Pot belly, flaccid arms, tittay pectorals, whimpy tongue, close-set eyes, inverted gherkin (okay, I gave myself creative license with that 'un), closet case fucktard.
......
I heard he came out...as a fully fledged fucktard.
*try saying 10 times quickly*
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Hats. If I ever see a hat on a bed in this house, man, like you'll never see me again. I'm gone.
I'm not worried about him, and I'm sure he's going to be just fine. Who cares about saggy tits when the guy has got millions of pounds in the bank?
As vain as he is, I'm surprised Simon hasn't done something about the man-boobs.
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“You are obsolete ... look at all the white men on the street."
Pot belly, flaccid arms, tittay pectorals, whimpy tongue, close-set eyes, inverted gherkin (okay, I gave myself creative license with that 'un), closet case fucktard.
Yes, Simon...I just aimed my laser beams atchya but only in a constructive critique kinda way, honey bun.
Not even for all the yarn - or wool for the British - in the world would I ever...
His appearance could be overlooked, if he weren't such a douchebag.
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My other gig
My other hangout
Terri never struck me as someone who was a goldigger, unlike Sarah Dullson.
Is he "freckly"??? he's creepin' me out man!
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Why be difficult when you can be impossible!
Submitted by Charles Manson on November 1, 2008 - 3:57pm.
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You don't like his hair?
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Love's mysteries in souls do grow, But yet the body is his book.
~John Donne
I'm surprised anyone put up with this annoying arse for longer than a one night stand.
SHE LEFT YOU BECAUSE OF YOUR HIDEOUS FUCKED UP LOOKING HAIR. THAT IS WHY NO ONE WATCHES YOUR RETARDED TV SHOW ANYMORE BECAUSE EVERYONE VOMITS WHEN THEY SEE THAT FUCKED UP HAIRCUT.
Oh, for the love of fucking cornflakes! No man should ever stick out his tongue in that manner. Just flash your mini peen, Simon! Same difference.
~*~*~*~*A gentleman is simply a patient wolf....Lana Turner*~*~*~*~
Submitted by TITS on November 1, 2008 - 3:35pm.
Pearl - any chance of a buy one get one free deal?
Count me in!
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You can suckle them man titties on Sundays -- that's my holy shopping day! And if he IS a 'mo, even MO BETTA! All we gotta do is take turns on red carpets playin like it's a looove triangle for the media! OH HEY the bf wants a peak, hell no gotta go!@
Pearl - any chance of a buy one get one free deal?
Count me in!
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It looks like he has no nipple on his left moob.
http://www.myspace.com/12005637
more importantly
http://www.last.fm/user/sky_is_lovely
Submitted by TITS on November 1, 2008 - 3:18pm.
Submitted by Pearl_Necklace on November 1, 2008 - 2:54pm.
I've been sure since forever that children weren't about to come knocking out my vagina....and I kind of like those man titties, and I'm in So Cal...bbl, gotta make some calls!
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You're calling for take out man titties?
What else is on the menu?
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If all goes as planned, a stack of freshly minted benjamins with a side of gold bullion ;D
Tits
a side of valtrex
Submitted by Pearl_Necklace on November 1, 2008 - 2:54pm.
I've been sure since forever that children weren't about to come knocking out my vagina....and I kind of like those man titties, and I'm in So Cal...bbl, gotta make some calls!
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You're calling for take out man titties?
What else is on the menu?
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Rim-Job face.
No spank you.
Molly2008
Please go away!
thanks
xxyxz
Submitted by TITS on November 1, 2008 - 2:07pm.
Now a nice southern drawl will depant me in a heartbeat.
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Me too! But I like a British and Italian accent as well.
I've seen his profile on the fitness & celebrity dating club ^^^^^^FitnessKiss. C O M^^ ^^^^ for hot singles to hook up for Hot Love and Sexy Dating.
Submitted by patty cake on November 1, 2008 - 2:24pm.
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shit.Everything I just wrote I had to delete because of guilt.
I've been sure since forever that children weren't about to come knocking out my vagina....and I kind of like those man titties, and I'm in So Cal...bbl, gotta make some calls!
Submitted by parissucksliterally on November 1, 2008 - 2:47pm.
I hear ya!
I think Holly just found her new baby-daddy.
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2008 World Series Champions
#1 Philadelphia Phillies!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xdCrZfTkG1c&feature=related
I will gladly take Simon and his fortune. He can insult me all he wants- I am sick of being poor....lol
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Fools in love, they think they're heroes, cause they get to feel more pain
I say fools in love are zeroes, I should know because this fool's in love again
-Joe Jackson "Fools In Love"
"When allowed to comment anonymously-most women will tell you that they wish they had never had children.(studies have been done on this)"
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Give me a break. I worship my daughter. She is the single most important thing to ever happend to me. And if you think I am making that up you are clueless.
*shedding tear*
Simon does a lot for the Pet Fwends, it's the only reason I don't totally hate him.
He does nothing for me.
"Going gray is like ejaculating. You know it can happen prematurely, but when it actually does, it's a total shock." MAH BOO!!!
Submitted by patty cake on November 1, 2008 - 2:24pm.
why do all these chics want babies? they arent all that great..they grow up to be pains in the asses and none of them take care of them anyhow... go childless..its much easier and cheaper...
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Bless you my child! When allowed to comment anonymously-most women will tell you that they wish they had never had children.(studies have been done on this)Biology...societal pressure...and STONE COLD COMMERCE usually have their way however.Babies are BETTER than an annuity when you breed with a deep pocket.Of course listening to your biological clock explains why otherwise intelligent women breed with losers they hate.Reality being that rich men are in short supply.Women have had birth control & the option for self-sufficiency in western civilization for only about 60 years now.That's still not enough time for it to take apparently.
Not sure where I was going with this ...but I was delighted to see your honest assessment.;->
Too sexy!
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NO I'M NOT HISPANIC I'M JUST A CRAZY CHICK HENCE CHICA LOCA ANYWAY TO THE IDIOTS IF YOU DON'T LIKE WHAT I SAY BOO HOO SCROLL DOWN TO THE NEXT COMMENT & TO THE PROFESSORS THAT LIKE TO TELL US WE CAN'T SPELL KISS OUR....
Enough of your insults MK.Just because gay men have this wildly unrealistic body ideal that demands a tightly ripped physique TO THE GRAVE...does'nt mean it's actually attainable.He's looking good for damn near 50...he's got a head full of hair...and mo' monaay than GOD.Besides I know some rich guys in far worse shape at a similar age as he-and they get premium poosay.Chix are just like that.Old,outta' shape rich broads don't have the same options.I hope this Terri broad is good with money.
why do all these chics want babies? they arent all that great..they grow up to be pains in the asses and none of them take care of them anyhow... go childless..its much easier and cheaper...
xoxox
The war isn't working.
Submitted by TITS on November 1, 2008 - 2:07pm.
Now a nice southern drawl will depant me in a heartbeat.
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Oooohhh... I second that!
Clarisse - it's a bizzaro world eh? A nice soft italian accent is nice too - as long as they're not talking trash... preferable food talk (that would be the ultimate in food porn)
You can be the antarctic - i've never really cared that much for penguins. I'll take the arctic - give me a raven any day.
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Shout out to Si...remove the moles, shave the chest hair and hey, if that doesn't work -- money talks. I liked them as a couple though.
I thought that was the case why he was afraid to break with her because she tried to kill herself before. Maybe he just didn't want kids with her. What a waste of time and energy for her to start all over now.
Please Mr. Francis Ford Coppola, make a Godfather part 4 with Talia Shire as the Godfather and Kay finally with the program.