Maureen McCormick Was Your Typical Fucked Up Child Star
When you used to be a child star and you no longer can get any roles and you've maxed out your reality show quota, the next thing for you to do is write a tell-all on how fucked up your life was when you were a kid. That's what Marcia Brady has done! Maureen McCormick is whoring out her new book "Surviving Marcia Brady and Finding My True Voice" and in it, she covers all the bases. Who knew being a Brady was so much fun?
Here's some of the things Maureen fesses up to:
She had a coke and ludes addiction
She fucked for drugs
She dated Steve Martin and Jacko
She almost lost her cherry to Barry Williams
She had full on drug binges at the Playboy Mansion
She had two abortions
She battled bulimiaAnd more!
Maureen said she believes she was so messed up, because of Syphilis. Yes, Syphilis. She went on "Today" this morning and said the disease caused her grandmother to die inside of a mental hospital. A week later her grandfather killed himself. After that, her mother got Syphilis.
Okay, maybe being a Brady isn't so fun after all..... She blames Syphilis, but I blame the fact that she touched tongues with Jacko. That will eff a bitch up.
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The blood test thing never made sense to me either. If you were responsible and perhaps less apt to have some disease because you were using precautions like condoms you'd show up to get tested prior to getting hitched. Yet, if you were like, say Jamie Lynn and doing your first cousin and getting pregnant every 3 months without benefit of the blood test, nobody would be the wiser. Just another tax grab I think.
Submitted by missy on October 14, 2008 - 3:30pm.
Wasn't Freddie Prinze, Sr., loaded on 'ludes when he committed suicide?
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I didn’t say that it was your fault – I said that I was going to blame you.
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I have syphilis, its not that bad!
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TEAM OJ!! INNOCENT!!!! FREE OJ!!! :o(
Submitted by TT99 on October 14, 2008 - 2:42pm.
What are ludes? My old boss told me about ludes one time. I think they make you sleepy or something. I don't even think drug dealers make them. I wonder why not.
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quaaludes are barbiturates. barbiturates are sedatives, like benzodiazepines, but work on different receptors than benzodiazepines.
From experience, they are like benzo's but make you feel a little more inebriated than just sleepy.
they are still made and I belive still over the counter in mexico. (I could be wrong on that)
They were widely prescibed in the 70's for anxiety which made them a lot more accessible. Benzodiazepines are prescribed almost exclusively for anxiety disorders today, as they have a shorter half-life and are a better fit to the type of chemical reactions taking place that cause anxiety. Other mental disorders are still treated with barbituates today, but not standard anxiety disorder.
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Fuck 'Em If They Can't Take A Joke
a message from the Church of the SubGenius
Thanks Momus and Snowy, I'll probably just ask some of my friends who've been recently married.
Submitted by KD on October 14, 2008 - 3:13pm.
Some states required or used to require a blood test to get a marriage license. Nevada doesn't. I got married in Lake Tahoe nearly thirty years ago and did not have to visit the vampires.
Check with the marriage license department in your county. Lots of states abolished blood tests.
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I didn’t say that it was your fault – I said that I was going to blame you.
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KD it depends where you get married. I did not need them.
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"This is MK. He started it" angel i
I don't get the Syphillus story either. The cure has been around for a long time and there are very obvious symptoms of it well before it enters the final, fatal stage.
Re: Syphilis. This is what Al Capone died of. Once syphilis is in the tertiary stage, basically eating up your brain, no penicillin in the world will cure it. As one of his henchmen said, "Al's nuttier than a fruitcake." Her gramma could totally have died a raving maniac in a nuthouse.
Momus or whoever- tell me about those blood tests. I'm probably getting married soon. They make you take blood tests? That just seems like an invasion of privacy to me. What exactly are they looking for and what do they do if they 'find something'?
She got hit in the face with a football one too many times.
Submitted by vajeon on October 14, 2008 - 2:58pm.
ITA about the penicillin.
However, I doubt that mum would be tested for any STDs if she was symptom-free.
Also, mum and dad may have been married in a state that did not require a blood test to get a license.
Plus, MM could simply be lying to boost book sales.
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I didn’t say that it was your fault – I said that I was going to blame you.
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What makes so many people think we want to read their life's story? Shoot, I'm to busy living mine to bother reading anyone's. I've got a huge stack of books that I want to read and probably never will, and this will never be one of them. I ever turned down that Tom Cruise book when I could've gotten it for free.
BIG HUG TO DRAMA!****************************1/20/09
"This is MK. He started it" angel i
MARCIA MARCIA MARCIA.cross???LOL MARSHA MARSHA MARSHA,,, :D :) Welcome to the club. ;>
Holy mother of God?!? That was TMI to the third power.
Submitted by snowpiece on October 14, 2008 - 2:16pm.
Submitted by NOT IMPRESSED on October 14, 2008 - 2:11pm.
Um, I don't get the syphilis part. How come everyone in her family has it? Incest? It's not hereditary.
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can you get infected in anyway besides sex? LOL NI I am making you our local syphilis expert. Sorry, I don't know Oscar Wilde.
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Actually, a person can get syphillis from good ol' mum through the birth canal if mum is infected when she delivers.
Lots of kids get born with STDs (e.g., herpes) from a vaginal birth.
I guess this make me the resident syph-expert.
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I doubt that her mother could go through her whole life and not be tested for STDs unless they just didn't do STD checks back then. Also, penicillin has been around a very long time and that's all you need to cure syphilis.
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I posed for raunchier pictures when I was in kindergarten. Really, I did -Michael K.
Wasn't it Susan Olsen that MK posted a youtube where she was doing a radio interview, very hungover w/ her kid in the studio, & had to leave to barf? Mike & Carol, you did a bang-up job!
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"I'm intellectual & stuff." "You're flunking English. That's your mother tongue & stuff."
http://www.myspace.com/dramaqueen365247
I saw an interview with that jan a couple of years ago, and my god she was a straight up fucking bitch, no sense of humor, just a total cunt, so maria's not missing out on much.
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This guy's a douche with a capitol bag!
Marcia, Marcia, Marcia!
Loved Jan Brady in the big black afro. Best episode ever!
Ludes = Qualudes not to be confused with Lube
LOL
TT99 Quaaludes, Tbag likes 'em too, LOL mmmmmwwwwah!
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"This is MK. He started it" angel i
Okay, I am so buying this Book!!! Who knew Marcia was interesting? What are ludes? My old boss told me about ludes one time. I think they make you sleepy or something. I don't even think drug dealers make them. I wonder why not. And what's with ALMOST losing your virginity to Barry Williams? That's a damn shame! You're Marcia fucking Brady! Seriously. Just stick your vagina on his penis while he's sleeping in his new room in the den with the disco lights. Jeez.
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"Where did you get that dress, it's awful, and those shoes..."
- Johnny "Airplane" 1980
Momus: that's what I was imaging to be the case. So, her granfather prolly gave to his wife, she gave it to her daughter, they both went nuts and Maureen got it the same way from her Mom.
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"This is MK. He started it" angel i
I used to think it was so groovy that her and I had the same first name. Now? Not so much.
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R.I.P. Susan 2/14/63 - 10/5/08
Best Friends Forever & Beyond
When asked why she did all this stuff, Maureen said, "I realized I was doing everything and anything, just to be popular!"
"This ain't rock n roll. This is genocide!"
Submitted by snowpiece on October 14, 2008 - 2:16pm.
Submitted by NOT IMPRESSED on October 14, 2008 - 2:11pm.
Um, I don't get the syphilis part. How come everyone in her family has it? Incest? It's not hereditary.
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can you get infected in anyway besides sex? LOL NI I am making you our local syphilis expert. Sorry, I don't know Oscar Wilde.
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Actually, a person can get syphillis from good ol' mum through the birth canal if mum is infected when she delivers.
Lots of kids get born with STDs (e.g., herpes) from a vaginal birth.
I guess this make me the resident syph-expert.
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I didn’t say that it was your fault – I said that I was going to blame you.
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*Yawn* This would have been interesting 30 years ago....now it's just desperate.
The most important question of all: Which celebrity's babies did she abort?!
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"Her voice sounds like a goat in heat..." - Balenciaga Bitch on Sarah Palin (10/6/08).
i'm confused...is marcia fucked up because she was brady or is she fucked up because she had the syph...or is marcia just fucked up?
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i will pineapple slap your ascot
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0WtHRMtftOs
you guys! those freaking sausages have ruined my hummus!! BLECH
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"This is MK. He started it" angel i
What no Brady family gang bang? What a disappointment.
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So you’re talking someone that’s as stupid and talentless and messed up as Britney Spears cooking? Anthony Bourdain
*sigh*...another one! At least she waited 30 years to come out with all of it.
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“Your highness, when I said that you are like a stream of bat's piss, I only mean that you shine out like a shaft of gold when all around it is dark”
Wow....growing up Brady was all kinds of fucked up I guess.
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"Im totally cereal!"
the tags for this thread are hilarous:
Crackheads • Party Like A Brady
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"D-Listed is like chicks who hang out together for a long time- they start getting their periods the same day.
All d-listed sluts start to think exactly alike after a while. LOLOLOLOL" Mel-tang!
OMg, i apparently totally had th worst parents.. Like.. WTF..
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Don't we make you Laugh??
Aren't we Fuckin Funny!!!?
She dated Jacko? OK now, that's just bragging.
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You're never too old to become younger.
-Mae West
this should be another of example to parents why they should NOT get their kids into show business.
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"I really loved my husband's penis. It was really pretty."
- Pink, on her ex - Cary Hart
Damn. And she spent much of her youth in a fake yard with astro turf. Sucks to be her.
WTF....syphilis! Poor Marsha.
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Happiness often sneaks in through a door you didn't know you left open. ~John Barrymore
WTF?
No seriously
WTF?
I get the horze for drugs thing, but the whole crazy from syph, is that for real?
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“When a thing is funny search for a hidden truth.”
Submitted by NOT IMPRESSED on October 14, 2008 - 2:11pm.
Um, I don't get the syphilis part. How come everyone in her family has it? Incest? It's not hereditary.
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can you get infected in anyway besides sex? LOL NI I am making you our local syphilis expert. Sorry, I don't know Oscar Wilde.
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"This is MK. He started it" angel i
She said out of all the "brady's" Jan's the only one that won't speak to her, because during an interview, she joked about all the sex on the set and said, I've even kissed Jan. She said it was a joke, but Eve didn't take it that way. I'd be like, Shit..that bitch was always jealous of me!
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Did you say, "he was E-moaning?!"
She had a coke and ludes addiction
She fucked for drugs
She dated Steve Martin and Jacko
She almost lost her cherry to Barry Williams
She had full on drug binges at the Playboy Mansion
She had two abortions
She battled bulimia
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uh, SO???!
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Fuck 'Em If They Can't Take A Joke
a message from the Church of the SubGenius
I watched her this morning.. my mouth kept dropping open with each new bombshell. Her Grammy actually died in an insane asylum (her words) going crazy from syphillis and her mom contracted it as well. She didn't say what her mother died of however.
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Did you say, "he was E-moaning?!"
omg, JINX to inth power!!!
...I am aka BRADIFUL BITCH, I SWEAR!!!...
My tell all is titled
"Surviving Puberty and Telling People To Go Eff Themeselves"
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http://www.myspace.com/oxygen162
Happy Halloweeny
Marcia, Marcia, Marcia.
...I am aka BRADIFUL BITCH, I SWEAR!!!...
Marcia, Marcia, Marcia. I'd expect this behavior from Jan, but I am so disillusioned. My blood runs cold, angel was a coke ho.
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I didn't say she was dead, I said I killed her.
Um, no one "dates" Jacko. Unless you're Macaulay Culkin, Corey Feldman, or Emmanuel Lewis.
Um, I don't get the syphilis part. How come everyone in her family has it? Incest? It's not hereditary.
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How can you thank God for a song that the Devil helped you write?
wow, a child actor had problems?
REALLY?
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I thought I knew you, I got a new view
I thought I knew you well...
Oh well
- No Doubt "Sunday Morning"