The Empress Of Lucite Is A Devoted Mother, Part II

The elegant natural beauty known as Shauna Sand was once again out with her daughters yesterday. The work of a mother goddess is never done. Shauna took her daughters to the pumpkin patch to probably pick out sizes for their new boobs. She's a hands on kind of mother.

The Empress of Lucite glided into the pumpkin patch looking like the Virgin Mary returning to the manger. Every step Shauna took with her exquisite lucite heels, the hay burned beneath her. It couldn't handle her holiness. She had to leave after a few minutes because the pumpkins couldn't handle her raw beauty and they started shaking in her presence.

I'm sure Tori the Hutt wasn't thrilled with the Empress making an appearance at the pumpkin patch. Shauna's gorgeousness only emphasizes the fact that Tori is one homely hag! She probably killed a few pumpkin's with her fugly mug. Yes, I'm taking my hangover out on her.

Others at the only pumpkin patch in Los Angeles where celebrity whores are allowed included Tori the Hutt's creepy husband, Marcia Cross and Spider-Man.

Bauer Griffin, Wenn

Submitted by fed up on Mon, 10/13/2008 - 6:05pm.

Please tell me this bitch owns more than one pair of shoes!!

Submitted by KA on Mon, 10/13/2008 - 12:01pm.

What in the name of Joan Van Ark is she doing to her face? WHAT IS WRONG WITH THESE HOLLYWOOD PEOPLE???!!!1

Submitted by nsaustin on Mon, 10/13/2008 - 9:16am.

God she's scary looking.

Submitted by Bondagebarbie on Mon, 10/13/2008 - 1:34am.

Wow,she looks awfully plastic in these photos,sometimes there is such a thing as too much plastic surgery.

Between two evils, I always pick the one I never tried before.

Submitted by islandgirl on Mon, 10/13/2008 - 12:10am.

Submitted by day shift stripper on October 13, 2008 - 12:36am.

Dean is picking out Tori's new implants.

I still don't get the pumpkin patch thing.
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Hahaha, I was going to mention something about that earlier but got distracted. (ooohh...shiny!!)
He makes me feel scratchy, and not in a good way.

And I don't get it either.

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A gourmet who thinks of calories is like a tart who looks at her watch. (James Beard)

Submitted by day shift stripper on Mon, 10/13/2008 - 12:06am.

Dean is picking out Tori's new implants.

I still don't get the pumpkin patch thing.

☠

"With every 5th Valtrex refill, you get your very own Vh1 reality show!" -MK

http://www.myspace.com/zoloftpony

Submitted by SugarCookie on Sun, 10/12/2008 - 11:14pm.

How does this bitch wake up in the morning, put this ridiculous shit on, and actually think she looks good? I mean she scared the shit out of me in that first photo. Not to mention she's the same size as her daughter.

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"If you're going to spew, spew in this..."

Submitted by belle on Sun, 10/12/2008 - 10:31pm.

Gah, did she just go down on Casper the Friendly Ghost? (Sorry, Casper!)

Submitted by bornagainChristian on Sun, 10/12/2008 - 10:22pm.

Swear to ME!

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Her face looks like it is made up for a Zombie flick...WTF??

I guess it is just because she is really dead inside..

Submitted by jussayin on Sun, 10/12/2008 - 10:14pm.

thanx! TITS helped me get it just right.

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You can't know what control really means until you lose it.

Submitted by Mr. President on Sun, 10/12/2008 - 10:05pm.

She loves Lucite so much, she is trying to transform her face into a mask of Lucite.

Love your avie, jussayin.

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"I think we'll need some more FBI guys."

Submitted by jussayin on Sun, 10/12/2008 - 10:02pm.

you're just not that classy, letinstar. face it.

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You can't know what control really means until you lose it.

Submitted by letinstar on Sun, 10/12/2008 - 9:57pm.

lucite heels in a pumpkin patch? now why didn't i think of that?_____________________________________________
i will pineapple slap your ascot
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0WtHRMtftOs

Submitted by speakit on Sun, 10/12/2008 - 8:51pm.

Submitted by Karen Flatts on October 12, 2008 - 7:54pm.
Nothing screams "class" like a winter coat paired with pale pink lipstick and see-through open-toed summer shoes.

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What about flip flops, a leather jacket and bermuda shorts? just curious

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Submitted by bambam on October 11, 2008 - 9:42pm.
We are all the same.....and then there is speakit.

Submitted by timeywimey on Sun, 10/12/2008 - 8:45pm.

She prolly fell wearing those heels in pumpkin patch.

She also is a dumb bitch that supports mccain too!

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_John_McCain_presidential_campaign_e...

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goes ding when there's stuff!
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Submitted by stake_spike on Sun, 10/12/2008 - 7:45pm.

Why do all the celebs go to the same damn pumpkin patch???? Are there no grocery stores where they live? You'll be seeing more pics (like last year) of celebs posing for the cameras while taking their kids to this same damn place. Of course maybe that's why they do it, because they know the cameras are there. Attention whores.

As for Shauna, damn that makeup washes out her face.

Submitted by TexnDoc on Sun, 10/12/2008 - 7:45pm.

I agree with the lady behind the sign.

Submitted by Karen Flatts on Sun, 10/12/2008 - 7:24pm.

Nothing screams "class" like a winter coat paired with pale pink lipstick and see-through open-toed summer shoes.

Submitted by Hysteria on Sun, 10/12/2008 - 7:15pm.

i wonder if celebrity pumpkins cost more.

Toewee's baby is coot.

Submitted by parissucksliterally on Sun, 10/12/2008 - 7:14pm.

aquarius and speakit, HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAH

lucite boots and slippers...

Joan Van Ark.....lmao

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clowns to the left of me, jokers to the right
here I am, stuck in the middle with you

Submitted by Statler and Waldorf on Sun, 10/12/2008 - 7:14pm.

I want to know what kind of a world she's living in where she thinks that those shoes and all of that plastered-on makeup and lip injections look good. She's destroyed her face.

Maybe she's trying to be a Ganguro girl from Japan.

Submitted by speakit on Sun, 10/12/2008 - 7:13pm.

I bet she'll find lucite winter boots. Bet she has lucite house slippers too.

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Submitted by bambam on October 11, 2008 - 9:42pm.
We are all the same.....and then there is speakit.

Submitted by speakit on Sun, 10/12/2008 - 7:07pm.

Her waist is freakisly long. Her hips are as narrow as her child's. Her face is so fucked up I can't even describe it. There is absolutely NOTHING appealing about her so I hope she has a really good personality, but I'm guessing prolly not that either. Maybe a vag with suction power?

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Submitted by bambam on October 11, 2008 - 9:42pm.
We are all the same.....and then there is speakit.

Submitted by aquarius on Sun, 10/12/2008 - 6:46pm.

I am convinced that she, Heidi Montag, and Joan Van Ark are the same person, just in different time periods and alternate dimensions. Mark my words, in 10 years Joan will be dead, Shauna will look like Joan circa 2008, and Heidi will look like Shauna now, complete with two flesh-colored beard chill'uns.

Submitted by parissucksliterally on Sun, 10/12/2008 - 6:40pm.

her face is fucking SCARY in the main pic! what the fuck is that lip gloss?

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clowns to the left of me, jokers to the right
here I am, stuck in the middle with you

Submitted by Aamyko. on Sun, 10/12/2008 - 6:40pm.

The Kids..... oh lord please let them recover from their childhood and erase those hooker shoes from their mind.

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http://www.aamyko.com
Rugby Hotties!

Submitted by Cindyloo on Sun, 10/12/2008 - 6:38pm.

Does she only own one pair of shoes?

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"Crocs: They are to your eyes what second-hand smoke is to your lungs."

Submitted by angel_i on Sun, 10/12/2008 - 6:30pm.

@TITS;

I was looking more at her face...I din't even notice her boobies, acutally...lol...so, now that I have - I agree:)

♥ ThreadKilla!
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Submitted by TITS on Sun, 10/12/2008 - 6:28pm.

@Angel - I dunno. the plastic surg pic just looks like the effect of a differing bra.
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Submitted by angel_i on Sun, 10/12/2008 - 6:13pm.

Yeah, get back to me in five years about how great her kids look. They're young yet and since we're remembering...

The mother of the millenium!:
http://www.dlisted.com/node/21429

http://eur.i1.yimg.com/eur.yimg.com/xp/premiere_photo/20050906/03/159697...

http://www.makemeheal.com/news/images/shauna-sand-plastic-surgery.jpg

♥ ThreadKilla!
Send me your CELBRITY cholas for a new movie!
thirteenangels@live.com
New and Improved!!! Lean Like a Chola

Submitted by Sayonara on Sun, 10/12/2008 - 6:02pm.

Sure why not wear those skyscraper lucite heels to the pumpkin patch.

"...Hooked on your love sweet love song" Sparkle

Submitted by anna hannah on Sun, 10/12/2008 - 5:54pm.

Since I posted about Suri Cruise's ugly shoes it's only fair I comment on Lucite's. Does she think she's at the level of Jesus Christ? To always appear to be levitating inches off the ground. Obviously she's an airhead so this would explain a lot, but seriously it's not a good look for a mere mortal.

Submitted by tomservo on Sun, 10/12/2008 - 5:14pm.

the expression on her face is going to give me nightmares tonight

Submitted by heybungalowbill on Sun, 10/12/2008 - 4:51pm.

Aw, I love Shauna Sand. She may be a tacky slut but her kids ALWAYS look healthy, happy and clean. Honestly, maybe I'm naive but I think she's a great mother.

Submitted by forever.now on Sun, 10/12/2008 - 4:49pm.

to TITS...

I have no idea what she does for work. but whatever it is the lucite heels seem to be part of it. :)

Submitted by jussayin on Sun, 10/12/2008 - 4:40pm.

nice flesh tone Scream mask....oh wait.

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You can't know what control really means until you lose it.

Submitted by Madam Pince on Sun, 10/12/2008 - 4:33pm.

I suspect Lorenzo rules when it comes to dressing the girls. He failed miserably with his first batch of kids, but seems to be doing right by these.

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“My shoe is off, my foot is cold, and now my story is all told."

Submitted by putsomestankonit on Sun, 10/12/2008 - 4:29pm.

I love how they're all dressed like its so freaking cold out there in L.A. Here in PA it was up to 70 something, idgits.

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When Obama wins, please let someone bust out "Paint the Whitehouse Black" during his acceptance speech. Please God, Please!

Submitted by DreamyAguileraEyes on Sun, 10/12/2008 - 4:29pm.

Submitted by MissAnonymous on October 12, 2008 - 4:37pm.
I just saw the MOST DISGUSTING THING EVAHHHH!!!!! I was trying to find something about Shauna Sand and came across these pics (nip slip and upskirt). Her nipple looks like it is about to fall off... truly bizarre. NOTE: This is NSFW (in fact, the site says that it is "Not Safe for Humans" LOL...

http://www.egotastic.com/entertainment/celebrities/shauna-sand/shauna-sa...

Ewwww that's disgusting. WTF is wrong with her nipples??? Gross.

~♥~there's a villain in me so sexy sour and sweet
And you'll be loving it ~ Super Bitch - KGB
~♥~
My Last.fm
http://www.last.fm/user/SpiritDreaming

Submitted by GlitterSha on Sun, 10/12/2008 - 4:25pm.

Doesn't everyone think that Shauna should come out with her own children's wear line of heels and clothes!? What's she waiting for? Hollywood and Long Island would go nuts!

"Come on Gloria..."
-Hank Azaria "The Birdcage"

Submitted by Linda Lou on Sun, 10/12/2008 - 4:22pm.

I love how children redeem us as parents. Her children probably adore her and that's the way it should be. Every one needs love.

Submitted by TITS on Sun, 10/12/2008 - 4:12pm.

Submitted by MissAnonymous on October 12, 2008 - 4:37pm.

yupp. I believe they were posted here at the time.

Some wag commented that her gentials looked like a overstuffed suitcase that had a piece sticking out or something - it was funnier than what i wrote.

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Submitted by phoenix62 on Sun, 10/12/2008 - 4:10pm.

Ok. Now I've seen it all. I suppose this is THE pumpkin patch for all the celebs? I suppose you are turned away if you aren't SOMEBODY?

For Chrissake. How pitiful. I suppose all the celebs who need some exposure show up there.

www.myspace.com/mle62

Submitted by MissAnonymous on Sun, 10/12/2008 - 4:07pm.

I just saw the MOST DISGUSTING THING EVAHHHH!!!!! I was trying to find something about Shauna Sand and came across these pics (nip slip and upskirt). Her nipple looks like it is about to fall off... truly bizarre. NOTE: This is NSFW (in fact, the site says that it is "Not Safe for Humans" LOL...

http://www.egotastic.com/entertainment/celebrities/shauna-sand/shauna-sa...

Submitted by Green Is Good on Sun, 10/12/2008 - 4:06pm.

Additional: Does she look in a mirror before she leaves the house? Does she have any girlfriends who are willing to get honest and tell how ridiculous she looks?

Naw, she seems the type that has no lady friends. They'd be competition.

Submitted by Green Is Good on Sun, 10/12/2008 - 4:02pm.

Submitted by Salem13 on October 12, 2008 - 4:03pm.
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Gad, but your avie is scaring the CRAP out of me! But it is the Halloween season...

Submitted by TITS on Sun, 10/12/2008 - 3:45pm.

Submitted by forever.now on October 12, 2008 - 4:08pm.

shauna's daughters always look cute.

at least she is the one working and dressing sexy and not her little girls.
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She works? As what.

Submitted by xultar on Sun, 10/12/2008 - 3:44pm.

Her makeup is not cute. Why does she do that to herself?

Submitted by forever.now on Sun, 10/12/2008 - 3:38pm.

shauna's daughters always look cute.

at least she is the one working and dressing sexy and not her little girls. in hollywood there have been too many parents who have pushed their children into working and trading on their budding sexuality to make a buck.

I am glad the sluts round here recognize that. :)

hm... I wonder what lynne spears would do if we all showed up for her next signing for her book in praise of her wonderful parenting skills.

Submitted by Salem13 on Sun, 10/12/2008 - 3:33pm.

Who wears stripper heels to the pumpkin patch?
Is this the only pumpkin patch in LA? I always see pictures of celebs at this one patch.

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So you’re talking someone that’s as stupid and talentless and messed up as Britney Spears cooking? Anthony Bourdain