Naked Clowns!
Are you one of those fraidy cat bitches who are deathly afraid of clowns? Like this bitch? Well, if you are, let the naked clowns help cure your phobia! A group of 16 clowns in San Francisco came together to take it all off for a new calendar. The proceeds from the calendar will benefit MS research.
There's nothing creepy about a naked clown! If your pee hole is dripping a little because you're so scared, then your case is probably worse than you thought. Don't think of them as clowns. Just think of them as naked people baring their genitals for your viewing pleasure. Most genitals are not scary.
A couple of the clown dudes are kind of hot. Don't focus on the scary clown face that looks like it will wake you in the middle of the night and hack you into a million pieces. Think of the peen hiding underneath those silly clown props. Is it fat? Is it skinny? Is it smiling at you? Does it honk when you squeeze it? Does it have a round red nose? Well, if it has that then the clown needs to go get that checked out. The idea of seeing wang rules out the creepiness of the clown face.....
....Okay, I take that all back. I just went through these pictures again and I'm officially a little scared. I also can't wait to buy this shit and give it to all my clown-hating friends for Christmas. They will shit themselves. Literally.
Click here to see more pictures from this shit. Unfortunately, you have to buy the calendar to see the full Bozo.
John Wayne Gacy the serial killer liked dressing as a clown. This is just ONE reason clowns creep me out.
"When I die, Satan is going to weep, 'cause that bitch will know he is out of a job."
Looks like I'm clear on the Huntsman.
Recluse, not so lucky. Those fuckers are all over this place.
luckycharms!!!
A brown recluse???? FUUUUUCK that!!!! KILL IT!!!
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She just goes a little mad sometimes. We all go a little mad sometimes. Haven't you?
Luckycharms - a brown recluse? Those fuckers are poisonous!!!
Had a wolf spider in my garage once. The big fury fucker JUMPED at me!
M.E.:
In the Wiki article the only US states mentioned are Florida and Hawaii. But this is Wikipedia so...
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So you’re talking someone that’s as stupid and talentless and messed up as Britney Spears cooking? Anthony Bourdain
Arachnophobia. No. I have a brown recluse that has been living behind my refrigerator for about 2 years. He pops out every now and then. It's an old Southern thing. Don't mess with the recluse because they keep a tight ship around the kitchen.
Salem - I'm in CA.
Not tropic enough I hope.
SOOOOO not right. As a proud coulrophobic, I decalre that if someone thinks it's funny to get me this for a gag, they will wake up the next day with Chuckle's head in their bed.
Submitted by TypicalSituation on October 1, 2008 - 3:24pm.
why did i click on the spider link.... why why why????
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Never clicking on a link here is a lesson we've all had to learn the hard way.
My link is okay - there's blood, but it's just animated. :)
~~Pity the poor aussie cane toad. http://ca.youtube.com/watch?v=t3ENUqV5-bw
Salem13: HELLLLLLLLLS Yeah! I'll take FEET of snow before lookin at one of them bitches on MY wall!
Sorry, Sandbitch, but that Huntsman is ALL YOURS!
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"Shut up and deal with it! Now pass me the boxed wine!" -MK 8/20/08
ok, whew. no creepy huntsman spiders to stalk me in my sleep. much better now.
still worried about clowns, though.
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"Shut up and deal with it! Now pass me the boxed wine!" -MK 8/20/08
TypicalSituation:
LOL! DITTO on the northeast thing, suddenly snow storms/blizzards every winter don't sound so bad after all.
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So you’re talking someone that’s as stupid and talentless and messed up as Britney Spears cooking? Anthony Bourdain
Kill it.
And I want to see the dead spider body before I can go to sleep.
I live in a semi tropic place....And we have huntsman spiders, thanks for the reminder.
DRAMAQUEEN STAY OFF THIS THREAD I AM TELLING YUOU YOU DON'T WANT TO BE HERE :SPIDERS!****************************1/20/09
"We have your 401K. If you want to see it again give us $7 billion in unmarked bills"
why did i click on the spider link.... why why why???? thank you for the nightmares, salem13!
i have never seen anything that hideously huge in my life, aside from my sister's PET tarantula. and i hate that thing.
i am curious though, what it is and where it's from... hopefully not in the northeast...
Ok.. Huntsman... now WHERE's HE AT????
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"Shut up and deal with it! Now pass me the boxed wine!" -MK 8/20/08
M.E.:
Its called a Huntsman spider and unless you live in a semi-tropic place you ain't got nothin' to worry about :) Its times like this I'm glad I live in the Northeast.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sparassidae
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So you’re talking someone that’s as stupid and talentless and messed up as Britney Spears cooking? Anthony Bourdain
Jesus Christ, that spider gave me the worst willies EVER!
ACK!
The Huntsman is harmless and can even be tamed. It is the little fuckers that you have to be scared of. Yeah redback, I am looking at you.
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pathetic is chatting with bitch of crazy mouth
Funny Bitch LoLo as FLA
Submitted by M.E. on October 1, 2008 - 3:12pm.
Submitted by Salem13 on October 1, 2008 - 3:05pm.
I hope nobody here has Arachnophobia.
http://www.myconfinedspace.com/2007/05/20/clock-spider/
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OMFG!!!!!!!!! WHAT KIND OF GOD DAMN MOTHER FUCKING HUGE ASS SPIDER IS THAT??????
FUUUUUUUUUUCK!!!!
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It's only a Huntsman...
*only*
Potato Bugs.
I HATE those fucking things. I swear to God they are aliens.
HATE THEM!
http://www.potatobugs.com/
not scared of them, just hate them.
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But I've got to say. You should look into getting a life too "Christine the Hoff". You're another one thats always on here wasting your life away.
I have been scared of clowns since childhood. I never liked them, always got a weird feeling around them. But then thanks to Poltergeist, then IT and Killer Clowns from Outter Space and 54720587 other things, I'm scared of them.
I avoid them to the nth degree.
Submitted by Salem13 on October 1, 2008 - 3:05pm.
I hope nobody here has Arachnophobia.
http://www.myconfinedspace.com/2007/05/20/clock-spider/
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OMFG!!!!!!!!! WHAT KIND OF GOD DAMN MOTHER FUCKING HUGE ASS SPIDER IS THAT??????
FUUUUUUUUUUCK!!!!
*starts erratically scanning walls and behind desk for spiders*
*starts twitching*
*runs away screaming*
Submitted by M.E. on October 1, 2008 - 2:46pm.
Flatsy, yes, that is who I'm thiking of. It scares the shit out of me.
I refuse to watch!
Agreed - Goddess Bunny is much more frightening than naked clowns. Pale, pastey, 20-something naked clowns with nasty feet.
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She's flat and that's that!
Submitted by Soy on October 1, 2008 - 2:59pm.
What is up with the clown phobias for the last few years? It's like a trend. Was there memo about Coulrophobia being the new black?
Nope! I got the memo on my fourth birthday when i had a Cow Girl themed party with ponies and little yellow plastic cow girl hats.
Notice I said nothing of a rodeo or a god damn rodeo fucking clown? (excuse my cussing, this upsets me;p)
My tarded ass Aunt Cee dressed up as a clown and tried to lead me and my beautiful little pony around a simple little circle track marked with bales of hay.
That dumb bitch drunk clown freaked the little mini pony the fuck out and he lost his shit with me on my back.
Me not knowing it was my aunt dressed up in runny, sloppy, gin soaked clown make up who was so toasted she was now wearing the red rubber nose on her two-head, also freaked the fuck out.
After the pony ran into the fucking bale of hay trying to get away from my monster aunt and tossed my on my little baby ass!
The ony took off running and three other ponies followed. Children were flying every fucking here man!!!!! They were making these screaming pony noises!
My little pony ran into the wooods and So did I and my ass stayed there till my mom came to get me!
SO FUCK CLOWNS!
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We is tailing jokes in hair twoday!
I hope nobody here has Arachnophobia.
http://www.myconfinedspace.com/2007/05/20/clock-spider/
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So you’re talking someone that’s as stupid and talentless and messed up as Britney Spears cooking? Anthony Bourdain
What is up with the clown phobias for the last few years? It's like a trend. Was there memo about Coulrophobia being the new black?
........
Fer sure maybe, fer sure not, fer sure eh, fer sure bomb...
Submitted by platypus on April 9, 2008 - 5:12pm.
Chuck Norris didn't excuse Steven's beauty
I've been scared of clowns ever since that closet scene in Poltergeist. And my mother is deathly afraid of roaches. We were living in an apartment once while my mother was looking at houses, and one crawled on the paper towel roll. Instead of throwing away the top sheet, she threw away the ENTIRE roll. She used to wake up in the middle of the night screaming that they were crawling on the ceiling (they weren't). Some people just have phobias. Meh, anyclowncellulite, I would have made them airbrush my ass if it looked like that sitting on a bench...
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"that is not a common looking vagina right?"
Submitted by Sluttsville on October 1, 2008 - 1:58pm.
AGREED - 150 fucking percent. i hate clowns. they're creepy, and naked clowns just added to it. *shudder*
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"Shut up and deal with it! Now pass me the boxed wine!" -MK 8/20/08
Flatsy, yes, that is who I'm thiking of. It scares the shit out of me.
I refuse to watch!
does anyone think the last clown has a rojo caliente feel to it, or am i still drunk?
-=meow hiss purr=-
I can understand this to a certain extent. I have a roach phobia and on the extreme rare occasion I see one in my house I completely freak and won't go into that room for days. But a clown? I'm not that crazy about clowns either, but a least you know they are humans just dressed differently. If you're reacting that bad to what you know is just another person dressed weird, you have a serious problem.
Submitted by M.E. on October 1, 2008 - 2:19pm.
Goddess Bunny, is that the creepy shit I'm thinking of??
You are. Check it out, he's a guy w/ polio.
http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Goddess_Bunny
I miss La Pequena. He makes me laugh.
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She's flat and that's that!
I am terrified of clowns...I see nothing cute or funny or endearing about them. And this photo shoot is hella stupid and creepy.
This puts a whole new spin to the Magic Garden.
I betcha this will be the next shoot on America's Next Top Model
I am still afraid of them...hate them ever since Dumbo, and then Poltergeist...You never know what hides behind those red noses.
Goddess Bunny, is that the creepy shit I'm thinking of??
Me no like neked clowns.
Put it on!
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She's flat and that's that!
angel_i:
Well if they look anything like Carrot top, then yes I guess they can be scary.
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So you’re talking someone that’s as stupid and talentless and messed up as Britney Spears cooking? Anthony Bourdain
I'm actually more terrified of the Bunny something character and La Pequena.
hmmmmm....creepy, but hot. This is sparking weirdness in me, now I want to do sexytime with a clown in full get-up.
yeah, the Asian clown is the only cool one
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"We have your 401K. If you want to see it again give us $7 billion in unmarked bills"
I am fully in love with Thumb 3 clown!
♥ ThreadKilla! / New and Improved!!! Lean Like a Chola/ She's a Lady/ MK luvs his cholas but Mawy started the chola makeo
I am scared of clowns, but not really these ones.
*hates clowns face*
I've never been scared of clowns until now, having never seen one up close, or naked. Thanks M.K. :( I'm picturing Phoebe Price in a clown suit complete with the red nose, she already has the ridiculous hair and outfits.
If Lohan and Sam gained 30 lbs, I can see them doing this.
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Submitted by Salem13 on October 1, 2008 - 2:01pm.
I feel like I'm the ONLY person that has ever, and will ever exist that tought clowns were never scary.
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I am a clown. I am not scary:) Mostly:) Some clowns ARE scary. Like stand-up comedians, sometimes they're assholes.
These clowns are so cute!
♥ ThreadKilla! / New and Improved!!! Lean Like a Chola/ She's a Lady/ MK luvs his cholas but Mawy started the chola makeo
That's a hot calendar.
But getting back to the lady who's panting in the corner when Mr. Giggles comes into the room... don't you think it would help in some way if she herself would dress up like a clown? I don't know, maybe take some of the fear away?
Craziness.
Submitted by putsomestankonit on October 1, 2008 - 2:01pm.
Where is John Wayne Gacy when you need him?
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Dude was only into boys... you might want to choose some fucker who kills indiscriminately.
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" That which does not kill me only postpones the inevitable."