When JLo Speaks, Bullshit Comes Out
Triathlon champion and injured foot faker JLo tells People that she spends every free moment with her beloved Dragon Tales Twins. JLo said that she recently hired a nanny, so that she can have a little time to herself. HA!
She said: "I did it for a long time but we started using a nanny a few weeks ago. Most days I get up early with them. Then when the nanny comes, I can take a shower and give them their breakfast. She's there to help me get things done." JLo only leaves them to go to work. "I try to spend every free moment with the babies."
It must be wonderful to be JLo. You lay around on your rabbit comforter, taking in the sweet scent from $100 candles while telling a bunch of bullshit lies as though it was the truth.
JLo went on to talk about the magical mornings she spends with her newborns: "When they see you and have that big smile on their face – I live for that. And when I put them to bed at night and they melt in your arms. I give them a bottle and wind it down. I say, 'It's time for beddy-bye.' I hold them and sing a little song. By the time you know it, they are asleep."
This quote came right out of a Disney movie, right? In her mind, JLo is fucking Donna Reed. She probably has a writer on staff who feeds her all of these nauseating quotes.
Below is JLo shopping in St. Tropez yesterday. Before you say anything, shopping is not considered "free time" to JLo! It's part of the job description of a self-centered, delusional, Hollywood hobag!
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JIM, I KNEW THAT WAS YOU!!
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What inspired this amorous rhyme?
Two parts vodka, one part lime.
Aye carumba is there a fat girl waiting to get out of there or what?
Douchebag.
IT MUST BE REAL GOOD AND HEALTHY TO DRAG THESE 'NEWBORNS' ALL OVER THE WORLD SO YOU CAN SHOP YOU FUCKING CUNT...I HOPE SHE COMES TO SO. CAL. SO I CAN SHIT ON HER AND SNEEZE ON THE KIDS!
"I try to spend every free moment with the babies."
And she tries to ensure that she never ever has a free moment. Besides, I thought that she charged megabucks for personal appearances and, thus, never has a "free" moment. ;)
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I didn’t say that it was your fault – I said that I was going to blame you.
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I imagine the babies asked her to get a nanny. She's an insufferable bitch and we all know kids have good radar for those types.
If this bitch spends 2 hours a day with her kids, I would be really surprised.
She probably only sees them when they're in the arms of the nanny, being ushered out of sight so mommy can do a photo-op or sound bite in peace.
I love that dress. Looks like suede. Butttttt only a skinny minnie should wear something cut like that. Not a wide end receiver like this woman.
Submitted by Aerialgreen on September 18, 2008 - 3:34pm.
They both probably made good investments. She was overpaid in everything she did.
the dude walking beside jlo looks hot...and i guess since she doesn't have the twins with her, shopping in st tropez must be work...and therefore not considered "free time"..
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that's some serious meat you're packin'...
hey let's let chief eat his MEAT!!!!
GO MEAT!!!!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ygdz86_-JDc
One little, two little, three little Skeletors. Five little, six little, seven little Skeletors.
how can someone say they spend 'every free moment' with their kids and feel good about it? i mean are you fucking serious? "whenever i get a chance, i hang with them" LMFAO. "when my fat ass feels like it, i pay them a visit." every free moment. sheesh.
Good Dog, Jenny from the Block is so FULL OF SHIT.
Submitted by Salem13 on September 18, 2008 - 3:35pm.
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It tastes like Tab + Diet Coke. It does not taste like Coke or a non-diet drink.
OMG I'm more interested in that guy drinking coke zero!! Has anyone tried it? I'm afraid to try it something with no calories in it just makes me run in the opposite direction, its work of the Devil.
Do her perfume and clothes line are really selling that well that she is allowed her to be such a douchebag?
I mean, God knows both her singing and movie career are deep in the toilet right now, were does her money come from?... the concerts with Skeletor can't be that good and neither can be the sales of all that ghetto crap she is currently peddling.
I never had "me time" until my kids went to school, then I had to clean up, shop for dinner, pick them up for school....hey wait a minute! I NEVER have "ME TIME"!!!!
Okay Hiawatha, Chief Black Crow gave your babies new names... Smaller Than Left Ass Cheek and Smaller Than Right Ass Cheek
Oh, and her ass is still enormous.
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What inspired this amorous rhyme?
Two parts vodka, one part lime.
Whew! What stinks? Smells like bullshit. Someone fire up one of those $100 candles.
I want a little baby but i would never sing it Jenny from the block or let a vampire hold it.
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We is tailing jokes in hair twoday!
She sings them a song?????!!!!! i thought she loved them.....why would she torture them like that!!!!!!
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"Home remedy #108: IF YOU HAVE A BAD COUGH, TAKE A LARGE DOSE OF LAXATIVES. THEN YOU'LL
BE AFRAID TO COUGH.
Of course those babies fall asleep when she "sings" them a little song. They're trying to shut out the caterwauling.
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What inspired this amorous rhyme?
Two parts vodka, one part lime.
I dont know why she's famous. She looks so plain looking.
I feel bad for the dragon tale twins. They have to listen to her "sing" to them before sleepy time, I'm sure they have nightmares about off-key big bootays with sharp teeth and skeletons drinking human blood
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Sugar Magnolia
what the hell does she think shes bloody pocahontas now?
She's spent every waking hour with her babies for "a long time?" Dear God, weren't those kids just born? Someone tell her she'll be raising these kids for years... and that it's ok to have help. A grandmother, a nanny, whoever.
Nice dress Pokafatassidiot
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We is tailing jokes in hair twoday!
Whoopie fuckin' do. My friend has twins and has no option, not even her husband, to rely on for help because he's deployed. I don't care how "normal" you think you are, honey. Real women can run circles around you.
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"There's a little bit of asshole in every nice guy, and there's a little bit of genius in every moron." - RDJ
And I thought everyone who looked at those ugly rat-faced babies turned to stone. Shows what I know!
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"that is not a common looking vagina right?"