Charity Starts At Home
Brit Brit and her family have donated to the Promises Foundation in L.A. an autographed portrait painted out of automatic transmission fluid and Pennzoil 30W motor oil. Joking. It's an oil painting done by Daniel Maltzman. How sweet, bitches couldn't write a check?!
The auction started out at $10,000 on eBay, so bid with confidence! If you got the coins to buy this piece of American history, get your ass to eBay. Winning bid will also receive choices of a case of WD-40, a box of 12-gauge shot gun shells and/or a year supply of beer nuts.
Pictured above is Brit Brit standing next to the glamour shot. The painting includes a letter of authenticity from Daddy Spears (who more than likely will be promoting in the near future, a boxing match between himself and Adnan), which states: "I hereby verify that the portrait of my daughter, Britney, has been in our home since it was completed by the Daniel Maltzman Studio."
What?! Bitch, you need some fucking glasses!
Next thing you know she'll be signing pictures of Vladimir Putin and passing them off as herself and selling them on eBay for $50,000. If the artist really wanted to make the picture more convincing, he should have painted a bag of Cheetos or a Frapp in her hand, hell even a picture of her dropping a baby out of her arms. Something!
You know what, I'm gonna start taking the pictures out of frames at Wal-Mart and signing them and selling them as myself on eBay. Bidding starts at $1.00 with a low reserve.
P.S. - Is it just me or does it look like a crow is pecking at her eye in the painting? She probably has a few Cheetos crumbs in there and he's getting himself a little snack.
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Submitted by No Words on September 14, 2008 - 2:48pm.
I used to think it was her illness that prevented her from functioning as a mother because I remember in interviews she couldn't wait to be a "Momma". But now I see that she's just a selfish, dirty whore.
The artist didn't even try to fix those droopy boobs.
Suck it in, Swamp Thing. I despise Britney, I really do. This is what she was doing in between her sons's birthdays? What a fucking loser.
I HATE THIS TRAMP!
What about the Britney Spears Foundation, BITCH? What about all those children with special needs that you PROMISED TO HELP???
Screw them huh? As long as the world thinks your a good mother, screw EVERYONE ELSE.
I just want this tramp to die already. The world would be a better place without her.
~♥~Xtina, obey gravity - IT'S THE LAW!~Sandbitch~8/9/08~♥~
Keeps Getting Better
THE NEW SINGLE!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-O9G3JB8FG4
Submitted by ZiggyStardust on September 14, 2008 - 2:09pm.
She looks radiant.
Viper.
>:(
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To you, yes. To me something different. *shrug*
~"~"~"~"~~Mess with me and I'll bite you!.....Monquita Loca~~"~"~"~"~
Her dress is wonderful! like alwayzzzzzzzz!!!She's always so fierce, i love her. It's reported from NewY0rk times that She created an account at [ ____Seeking40plus COM_____ ] to date with a young boy in a coffee shop last week.
She is so hot and sexy..so many mature men want to date with her,but I hear she just dates a rich men at the dating site called 鈽呪槄鈽呪槄鈽呪槄鈽呪槄鈽呪槄鈽呪槄 [ ____Seeking40plus COM_____ ] 鈽呪槄鈽呪槄鈽呪槄鈽呪槄鈽呪槄鈽?.do you want to know more about her? her profile is really interesting.
The painting looks like something out of a late 80's/early 90's music video. I think I've seen it at a hair salon somewhere.
is that really Brit brit in the painting???????? Because it looks like it could be anyone
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"I'm ginna drezz mah baby in all bran namez 'n' if I can't afford it, I guess I'm ginna still it!" or "If mah baby losez its pacifier, I have three mo'!"
Britney's is like, oh I so totally look like that now..then sucks in her gut for the comparison shot. This is a way shiteous painting of her (any painting would be though), it should be sold on the street @ $30 TOPS! Delusional!
Your face!
Submitted by Sock-Monkey on September 14, 2008 - 6:00pm.
She looks radiant.
Viper.
>:(
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Are we sure Xtina has not passed on and her final request was to be embalmed standing up holding a bottle of her nasty perfume?- DivasGone
thanks hon!
have a good one, xo
What's with the body building competition pose? She looks fucking stupid.
~"~"~"~"~~Mess with me and I'll bite you!.....Monquita Loca~~"~"~"~"~
Sad that she looked like that only 5 years ago. Now she looks like a linebacker for the NY Jets. Go away Shitney!
angrymom, good luck on your test.
Focus, focus.
Catch you later.
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She's flat and that's that!
BREAKING NEWS:
J.Lo did the Triathalon......what's funny is, my guy did it too- I have to ask him if it was a mess of paps.....lmao
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I had to break the window, it just had to be
Better that I break the window, then him or her, or me
-Fiona Apple "Window"
flatsy, ewww-poor lass-I hope it gets fixed tomorrow
actually I'm taking a geography test right now
I better focus
lovesyou!
ok it kinda resembles her... but bitch please... her thighs have never been that thin to have a gap like that!! Brit Brit is all legs!
angrymom, no I left him (my dentist) a nice voicemail last night. Hopefully, he'll see me tomorrow to re-cement it. Of course, I can't stop touching the space w/ my tongue. Ugh.
Did you get through studying?
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She's flat and that's that!
Say what you will about the model, but I think the painting is stunning.
It's like a post-industrial dream. Pretty clever when you consider how mechanised and registrated Britney's work has been.
A timely reminder of what lays underneath even the most beautiful, well oiled machines.
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Are we sure Xtina has not passed on and her final request was to be embalmed standing up holding a bottle of her nasty perfume?- DivasGone
I've seen better work than this in freshman year, and I went to art school. I don't mind the graphic nature, but if you're going to paint something this simple, (in all ways!), you have to get the face right.
"This ain't rock n roll. This is genocide!"
green -done and done
flatsy -owch, that sucks...is it fixed?
Submitted by angry mom on September 14, 2008 - 2:00pm.
Don't be sorry. It's good to let it out.
She is a very sad case.
Can I bitch? My fucking crown fell out last night at dinner. Pisses me the fuck off. If I wasn't w/ the hubby to witness it, I think he would think I was having an affair w/ my dentist.
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She's flat and that's that!
ubmitted by angry mom on September 14, 2008 - 12:16pm.
greeeeeen!
my lost red headed stepchild!
lemme rub your head and give you some Mike and Ikes
xxoo
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Make it cherry Twizzlers and I'm in. Rub away.
i love you flatsy
this skank sparks violent rage inside my guts
i'm sorry
Hey angry mom, you sound angry.
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She's flat and that's that!
what a loser hillbilly dirty skank whore trashy farty moron delusional ugly wasteful stupid self absorbed irresponsible stank arrogent twit Shitney is.
that is all.
edited for boobs cause i didn't know what that meant...I thought is meant stupid which shitney personifies...my teacher was clearly a yuppie moron and I am for immitating him :D
Oh, and may I add: Nice man arm, Brit.
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"How much is that doggie in the window?"
Submitted by angry mom on September 14, 2008 - 11:13am.
I can't blame you, mind ya.
I too had a teacher that would use that word as an insult.
She even called us once 'teutonic ignorants'
And well ya know me..I got fed up and expressed my feelings of shoving a dictionary up her sorry ass for using my origin as an insult.
but they just won't learn! Anywayssss (since I really don't want to start a racial battle, I was just commenting and telling you a little story) I will comment on topic again:
THAT IS NOT OIL PAINT. That is aquarella.
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"Writing that made my eyeballs fart." MK
They had an ugly painting of Britney in her underwear and covering her breasts hanging up in their home? Strange family.
Q: If I bid and win, can I pick it up from Britney's house and take a picture with her?
A: Since this painting was donated by the Spears family, not Britney herself, we can’t state whether or not a photo opportunity would be available.
I found that reading the stupid auction on that link in the article but...
What the fuck, man? Why would you want a picture with her? GO READ A BOOK, YOU MORON and clear your thoughts of cheap chips and overpriced coffee.
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"Writing that made my eyeballs fart." MK
greeeeeen!
my lost red headed stepchild!
lemme rub your head and give you some Mike and Ikes
xxoo
The money from this auction should go to the "JJF and SPF Therapy Until they're 30 Fund".
When will they stop foisting Chicken Fried on us?
Does anyone really care about this swine?
Makes me furious that people consider her relevant anymore.
angry mom, now THAT'S a good rant!
booooooobbbbbssss!!!!!
i dunno...
my old english teacher used to say it in high school...it just sounds funny
good morning to you lass :)
The painting should have been done in day-glo paint on black velvet. THAT is how the Spears really roll.
"Ummm"... is not an answer!" Judge Judy
evil shoe-get her!
:)
angry mom
I love you! (and good morning to you)
but "teutonic"?
I'm teutonic...that means I'm German =S
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"Writing that made my eyeballs fart." MK
That dress she's wearing is horrid. The painting's not bad, but it doesn't look like her. LOL at the "crow pecking at her eye" comment!
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"How much is that doggie in the window?"
First MTV kisses her ass with 3 moon men, now this?! What has this twat done to deserve ANY kind of praise, other than wearing underpants in public?
Ugly.
And an outside link to other things for sale outside of eBay.
Hmmmm, which violation to choose from...
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Dick happens! - MK
Wow she's really sucking that gut in. I wonder how long she can hold her breath.
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hSyOCx6ZXfM&feature=related
Oh my, do we have an illegal eBay auction here that's not up to Charity standards?
*clicks report link in auction*
Yeah, I'm a bitch that way.
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Dick happens! - MK
Albino Slug is a great name for a ska-punk band.
OOooOOoOooOOO!
Me likey =D
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"Writing that made my eyeballs fart." MK
"You know what, I'm gonna start taking the pictures out of frames at Wal-Mart and signing them and selling them as myself on eBay. Bidding starts at $1.00 with a low reserve."
LOL Can you imagine the Dlisted-a-loonies bidding on that shit? Buying ID!
hahaa! poor snake who eats this mess!
albino slug???
vomits in mouth.
come to think of it, albino slug's a great name for this fucking useless bitch.
yeah, having kids really takes it's toll on your tanning hours.
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"what're you still doing here? Didn't I tell you to go home and fuck your mother?"
200 years from now, if archeologists are unfortunate enough to uncover this mess, they're gonna think "Key-rist! This is tackier than those velvet Elvis's!".
Submitted by christine the hoff on September 14, 2008 - 10:55am.
they don't make snakes big enough to cover those beefy arms.
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True..well maybe if she borrowed one of the foam anacondas from those shitty movies (will never forget JLo in the first one....God spared my eyes and brains on that one!).
Then MAYBE she can get her arms covered?
or maybe we can get a real one, a real oversized reticular snake that will swallow her whole? You know...ugh I feel bad for the snake that might get that job =S
EDIT Oil paint my ass. That is CLEARLY aquarella.
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"Writing that made my eyeballs fart." MK