Jenny And The Scot?
Pizza Face Diaz is currently boinking Jennifer Aniston's ex, Paul Sculfor, so it makes sense for Jenny to pick up Cammy's leftovers. Hollyweird is just one big key party. According to the Mirror, Maddox's arch rival has been seen with Gerard Butler.
Lainey also claims that Jenny and Gerard were "canoodling" at the Hyatt in Toronto on Sunday night. Gerry apparently had his hand on her thigh and also rubbed her shoulders and back. Methinks Gerry was trying to calm Jen down, because as soon as he started talking to her, she said, "ohmygodiloveyou...ithinkiloveyou....letsgetmarried...wait..impregnantwehavetoget married ...ohno...yourgoingtoleaveme...iknowitiknowit...youregoingtoleaveme ..... NOOO!!!"
Gerry didn't have a Valium on him, so he just rubbed her back. A back rub from Gerry is better than Valium. However, Gerry's niceness is going to backfire! He doesn't know what he's dealing with. Someone send him the paperwork to file a restraining order just in case. It's good to plan ahead.
Seriously, I hope Jenny is just using him for a little quick dick. Hopefully, that's what her plan is. Gerry is a total heartbreaker. You can tell. Jen just needs to get in, get on, get off and then get out! But something tells me she's already added him to her "future husband inspiration board."
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LCT you can fart on my anytime, just don't pee on me.
off topic, I was nine months preggers and going at it with my baby daddy and when I came, I peed all over him.
I told him sorry, I didn't know if I was coming or going.
true story...
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"what're you still doing here? Didn't I tell you to go home and fuck your mother?"
FatMartha on September 11, 2008 - 10:54am
Do you mean like plaid suits circa 1976 wardrobe?
Just tell him plaid is your favorite color and you have a great Jesus Juice Smoothie recipe....
...I am aka BRADIFUL BITCH, I SWEAR!!!...
Jen got her hooks in Gerry....is this for reals???
Hmm...he hawt...but sooooooo hawt, theres no way she'll hold onto him. Wear your oven mitts Jenny!!
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Rumpletweezer ran the Dinky Tinky shop in the foot of the Magic oak tree by the wobble dum dum tree in the shade of the magic glade down in Dingly Dell. Here he sold contraceptives...
What part of Dear Frankie made you guys cry? I cry over friggin' falling leaves in the autumn and I didn't weep once in that movie.
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Say there was a fart pay it forward... if someone paid forward an egg fart to you, would you only be able to pay forward egg farts or could you pay forward cheese farts and chinese food farts?
Jen and Sienna should have a whore off.
Submitted by Clarisse on September 11, 2008 - 10:47am.
LCT,
Trap him! Ok. We (LCT/CTH/Mwuah)all should fuck though, to make sure one of us get's the golden ticket! (i can't actually have kids, but nobody needs to know that!)
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Ooooo, you are sneaky. I like the way your mind works. Well, since CTH doesn't want to and you can't, can I share my pregnancy farts with you both so you can live vicariously through me?
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Say there was a fart pay it forward... if someone paid forward an egg fart to you, would you only be able to pay forward egg farts or could you pay forward cheese farts and chinese food farts?
You guys crack me up!!! So funny.
I don't think y'all should worry about this. It's probably just another Huvane PR rumor to make Poor Jen seem like a femme fatale!!! I can't see Gerry wanting Jennifer Aniston. I seriously can't. She's too old and too ugly.
Submitted by christine the hoff on September 11, 2008 - 10:43am.
LCT
I'm too old for new babies let's get you preggers, I'll be the daddy! we cannot let her win this round.
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DEAL. Mmmm a GB baby. I could be the ugliest woman alive and the baby would still be hotter than a steaming coiler.
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Say there was a fart pay it forward... if someone paid forward an egg fart to you, would you only be able to pay forward egg farts or could you pay forward cheese farts and chinese food farts?
What the pickle is going on in here???
Martha...I think Orlando got out of his cage...i heard he just dropped 12 grand on Miranda. You better check your leash and make sure its still in place. lol
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Rumpletweezer ran the Dinky Tinky shop in the foot of the Magic oak tree by the wobble dum dum tree in the shade of the magic glade down in Dingly Dell. Here he sold contraceptives...
Submitted by FatMartha on September 11, 2008 - 10:54am.
He always wears plaid. ALWAYS. It bothers me. I'm pretty fashion-retarded, but I don't think I could date someone THAT fashion-retarded.
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That plaid would look great in a heap on the floor though.
Submitted by ImpertinentVixen on September 11, 2008 - 9:14am.
I LOVE LOVE LOVE Dear Frankie! That movie makes me well up every time.
Jennifer Aniston is beyond boring. You never hear anything about HER, just about the new guy she's supposedly with. Yawn.
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"F*ck you Tyra Banks, Oprah, Magic Johnson, Tiger Woods, Rockefeller. F*ck you." - La Pequena Hillary Clinton, 6/17/08
LMAO Bradi: he would probably sprinkle me with holy water and then stone me to death or something. Oh wait that's Catholics. Well whatever.
He always wears plaid. ALWAYS. It bothers me. I'm pretty fashion-retarded, but I don't think I could date someone THAT fashion-retarded.
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I'm so happy and scared to be here.
ohhh nononononononononoooo
not Gerry sobs uncontrollably
That is some majorly bad news.
I suppose it was just a matter of time before she got around to him, but still.
Next she'll be doing Viggo, and that will be the last straw.
FatMartha on September 11, 2008 - 10:47am
Drop your panties, watch him drop his religion like a bad habit.
...I am aka BRADIFUL BITCH, I SWEAR!!!...
clarisse, take one for the team! ovulate, bitch!
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"what're you still doing here? Didn't I tell you to go home and fuck your mother?"
OH SHIT GUYS. Hot Apostolic Christian Guy is sitting next to me! QUICK WHAT DO I SAY TO MAKE HIM DROP HIS FAITH AND MARRY ME!?!
(AC's don't marry outside the church. >:|)
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I'm so happy and scared to be here.
LCT,
Trap him! Ok. We (LCT/CTH/Mwuah)all should fuck though, to make sure one of us get's the golden ticket! (i can't actually have kids, but nobody needs to know that!)
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I live in the weak and the wounded, Doc.
I love my lil fancy hookers on here! Thanks for da love!
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I DID only have two beers, It was the Liqour that fucked me up!!
LCT
I'm too old for new babies let's get you preggers, I'll be the daddy! we cannot let her win this round.
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"what're you still doing here? Didn't I tell you to go home and fuck your mother?"
Submitted by FatMartha on September 11, 2008 - 10:37am.
*jumps up, knocks over a few tables* WHAAAAAAAAT!?!! THAT WHOREBITCH!!!! LET'S GET HER FUGLY ASS!!!! *locks Orlando in the cage for a few days, burns him with the end of a cigarette* WHORE MAN!!! YOU BELONG WITH HER!!!
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See? I'm telling you! MK should stop posting about what a stalker she is and start posting about what a fucking SLUT she is. everyone's so busy feeling sorry for her they completely disregard the fact that she's seen more cock than Tom Cruise's exhaust pipe.
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Say there was a fart pay it forward... if someone paid forward an egg fart to you, would you only be able to pay forward egg farts or could you pay forward cheese farts and chinese food farts?
Submitted by Clarisse on September 11, 2008 - 10:37am.
LCT,
Shouldn't we adopt one first to lure him in??
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No.. that would scare him. He could play the 'I'm not ready for an insta-family' card before we even got in. We'd have to be sneaky and TRAP HIM.
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Say there was a fart pay it forward... if someone paid forward an egg fart to you, would you only be able to pay forward egg farts or could you pay forward cheese farts and chinese food farts?
So has Jennikins not gotten The DLISTED memo that we decided she is John Stamos' future wife?
...I am aka BRADIFUL BITCH, I SWEAR!!!...
Submitted by LOVE CARROTTOP on September 11, 2008 - 9:31am.
Clearly you were sleeping that day. She's already had her old lady mitts on him.
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*jumps up, knocks over a few tables* WHAAAAAAAAT!?!! THAT WHOREBITCH!!!! LET'S GET HER FUGLY ASS!!!! *locks Orlando in the cage for a few days, burns him with the end of a cigarette* WHORE MAN!!! YOU BELONG WITH HER!!!
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I'm so happy and scared to be here.
LCT,
Shouldn't we adopt one first to lure him in??
I call BS on this story. *cuz that's what i need to believe*
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I live in the weak and the wounded, Doc.
Submitted by christine the hoff on September 11, 2008 - 10:29am.
LCT we must, MUST save our hot manly man from the clutches of this annoying she male!
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I have an idea. Let's go star in a movie with him, let him fuck us and get pregnant with twins!
HAHAAAAAAAA SUCKAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! Eat that, Maniston. Whoreface. She really is a slut. How many dudes has she been fucking lately?
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Say there was a fart pay it forward... if someone paid forward an egg fart to you, would you only be able to pay forward egg farts or could you pay forward cheese farts and chinese food farts?
Submitted by FatMartha on September 11, 2008 - 10:28am.
*toasts LCT with her lil carton of 2% milk* To Gerard Butler peen times!
Personally I don't have an opinion as long as she stays away from my Orlando. *tightens his collar and gets a better hold on his leash*
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Clearly you were sleeping that day. She's already had her old lady mitts on him.
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Say there was a fart pay it forward... if someone paid forward an egg fart to you, would you only be able to pay forward egg farts or could you pay forward cheese farts and chinese food farts?
Oh HELLLLL NOOOOOO!! I know my Gerry is a class A manwhore but damnit, no fucking way he can be knocking boots with that bitch!! First Naomi, then Cameron and now Jen? WTF??......It's funny because just yesterday I was online (instead of working) looking at some pics of Gerry and he has fucked some seriously fug bitches. The man is an equal opportunity dater. All types and all colors. I keep waiting to run into him here in NYC. I am not ashamed to admit that I would be a complete slut and hit that till the saints come marching in, if given the opportunity. Hell, he doesn't even have to buy me a drink. I'd be that easy.
P.S. How is everyone this fine day?? :D
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I'm so happy and scared to be here.
Okie, I light a water bong in your honor!
LCT we must, MUST save our hot manly man from the clutches of this annoying she male!
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"what're you still doing here? Didn't I tell you to go home and fuck your mother?"
*toasts LCT with her lil carton of 2% milk* To Gerard Butler peen times!
Personally I don't have an opinion as long as she stays away from my Orlando. *tightens his collar and gets a better hold on his leash*
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I'm so happy and scared to be here.
PS - Clarissalina and Okie Tokie, let's boink.
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Say there was a fart pay it forward... if someone paid forward an egg fart to you, would you only be able to pay forward egg farts or could you pay forward cheese farts and chinese food farts?
Submitted by Clarisse on September 11, 2008 - 10:25am.
LCT!
Good call! Bitch gets within blow job distance of Gerry's Excalibur, we work up Jolie mojo to smite her!
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Who the fuck does she think she is? I don't like her anymore. She's a bigger slut than Kate Hudson. At least I still like Kate Hudson. She could touch GB, that'd be ok. But Aniston? I can't believe I'm genuinely disgusted by this.
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Say there was a fart pay it forward... if someone paid forward an egg fart to you, would you only be able to pay forward egg farts or could you pay forward cheese farts and chinese food farts?
Hi Okie!!!
Feeling better I see.
GOOD
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Sugar Magnolia
Submitted by FatMartha on September 11, 2008 - 10:23am.
*divetackles/crushes LCT to death* I'M NOT SKIPPING! I'm in the cafe waiting for my next class to start so NEHHHH. *shoves a picture of JA licking Gerard Butler's neck in your face* EAT IT!!! EAT IT AND DIE!!
Just kidding you know I love you. My bloops salute you!
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LICK ANGELINA'S SMEGMAD TAINT AND DIIIIIIIEEEEE!
I love you too. Now let's have a drink.
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Say there was a fart pay it forward... if someone paid forward an egg fart to you, would you only be able to pay forward egg farts or could you pay forward cheese farts and chinese food farts?
LCT!
Good call! Bitch gets within blow job distance of Gerry's Excalibur, we work up Jolie mojo to smite her!
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I live in the weak and the wounded, Doc.
OOoohhhh, Clarisse! that feeels sooo good! Now rub me sllower, and Loooower! Now FASTER! lol..
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Missy, I'm at work, My email is messing up a bit!
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I DID only have two beers, It was the Liqour that fucked me up!!
*divetackles/crushes LCT to death* I'M NOT SKIPPING! I'm in the cafe waiting for my next class to start so NEHHHH. *shoves a picture of JA licking Gerard Butler's neck in your face* EAT IT!!! EAT IT AND DIE!!
Just kidding you know I love you. My bloops salute you!
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I'm so happy and scared to be here.
Submitted by FatMartha on September 11, 2008 - 10:20am.
I have been on DListed too long because I thought of LCT as soon as I saw this. And I KNEW that she'd freak out and say "TEAM JOLIE" if it turns out to be true.
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CLASS-SKIPPER! I'm touched that you thought of me and my anger.
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Say there was a fart pay it forward... if someone paid forward an egg fart to you, would you only be able to pay forward egg farts or could you pay forward cheese farts and chinese food farts?
I have been on DListed too long because I thought of LCT as soon as I saw this. And I KNEW that she'd freak out and say "TEAM JOLIE" if it turns out to be true.
P.S. NO I'm not in class. LEAVE MARFA ALOOOOOOOOOOOOOONE!!!
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I'm so happy and scared to be here.
Submitted by Clarisse on September 11, 2008 - 10:13am.
LCT,
RIGHT?!?!?!? Git er!!!
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I swear to God if she touches his knob I will forever be Team Jolie. Not even joking.
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Say there was a fart pay it forward... if someone paid forward an egg fart to you, would you only be able to pay forward egg farts or could you pay forward cheese farts and chinese food farts?
okie honey, are you at home?? i emailed you... Ive been worried!!!
(((((((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))))))))))
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Fuck 'Em If They Can't Take A Joke
a message from the Church of the SubGenius
I find it odd that no one has called JA "Anus-ton" unless I missed that, which is entirely possible.
A good suspenseful GB flick is Butterfly on a Wheel. Another good sobby romantic one is Dear Frankie. I could go on, but I will stop myself.
OKIE!
*rubs okies sore neck*
Ok love?
LCT,
RIGHT?!?!?!? Git er!!!
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I live in the weak and the wounded, Doc.
Snow. HI! yes, I am better, thank YOU! Still a bit sore, but hey, isn't that what 5th avenue dick is for? Well that is what I was always taught. Muahahahaaha
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I DID only have two beers, It was the Liqour that fucked me up!!
I WILL SPANK HER! FUCK OFF AND DIE AND DON'T TOUCH HIM!
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Say there was a fart pay it forward... if someone paid forward an egg fart to you, would you only be able to pay forward egg farts or could you pay forward cheese farts and chinese food farts?
OKIE! how are you, I heard you got hurt.
****************************1/20/09
"So I've learned to go get bigger thongs just to let people know I am wearing underwear. "
If they become a couple we can bestow a nickname, like JaBut, AntLer, or some such.
JA could use a real man after that douche nozzle John Mayer.
Sparkysnemesis: GB isn't married, and I don't think he and JA have been in a movie together.
"ohmygodiloveyou...ithinkiloveyou....letsgetmarried...wait..impregnantwehavetoget married ...ohno...yourgoingtoleaveme...iknowitiknowit...youregoingtoleaveme ..... NOOO!!!"
In all fairness to the Aniston, everybody has that reaction to Gerry.
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P.U.M.A.
Submitted by KD on September 11, 2008 - 9:55am.
He IS good looking, but to me, he looks like the kind of guy that has really stinky balls.
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BWAHAHAHAHAHA! Good one! Maybe Manniston could lick 'em clean and put a nice spit-shine on 'em for good measure ;>
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→←...When you come to a fork in the road, take it...◘•♣♣ Yogi Bera →←
wow..why some of you say jen is a slut?? and not a word about gerald...he is the same age as jennifer and not married. haha...the double standard..