Blanche Deveraux Is Going To Be Pissed
What in the "mother of the bride" hell is sleeping on Beyonce's head? Wake it up with a stick. Be careful though, because it might bite your ass. It looks a little hostile.
Beyonce is playing Etta James in a new movie and I guess she decided to keep the act going by wearing her Etta wig during a performance at Fashion Rocks last night. The wig looks more like a cross between Blanche Deveraux and Nancy Reagan. And it looks like wet cornstarch is the only thing keeping that wig on.
You know Solange was cackling backstage with her pocket mouse friend. Solange shouldn't have laughed though. Beyonce already got her ass earlier in the night. More on that later.
During Fashion Rocks, Beyonce joined Mimi, Mary J. Blige, Miley Cyrus and a bunch of other hos to warble through some song called "Just Stand Up." The performance aired during last night's "Stand Up to Cancer" benefit. Basically, except for Mary J. Blige, they all sounded like they had horny hamsters in their throats. When Mary opened her mouth, they all should have politely excused themselves and allowed her to sing the rest. I think Beyonce's wig was trying to make a run for it.
Miley Cyrus should not be allowed to sing....ever again. Bitch sounded like The Chipettes gone reggae. Not a pretty sound.
Here's more pics of Beyonce at Fashion Rocks last night. She also performed with a big fat douche named Justin Timberlake. He should really just go sit in the corner and fuck a bowl of Wheaties.
Getty, Wireimage
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Chris, I guess lots of people pay for that sort of 'thing'? That sorta 'thing' makes my head itch and my ears bleed just thinking about it. Ford Fairlane,,hmmm.....wasn't that Dice guy in that? I think I avoided that movie. Sorry if you liked it, I mean no insult, it just looked bad. But sometimes stupid movies are cool as hell! I still chuckle a bit seeing lizards blown off of rocks in Raising Arizona.
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Every normal man must be tempted at times to spit on his hands, hoist the black flag, and begin slitting throats-H.L. Mencken
Little Richard is weeping right now. Beyonce, why?
~"~"~"~"~~Mess with me and I'll bite you!.....Monquita Loca~~"~"~"~"~
Can anyone explain to me why EVERY singer pushes their voice into their nose? I can't STAND that.
And they sound like a high school chorus.
Submitted by Chris Eccleston: "... It's totally undeserved, but her people will make damn sure she's known as an icon."
Yup. Blind, unrelenting ambition trumps talent every time (Phoebe Price, anyone?).
Waddup with Miley and her "Wadeva~ Wadeva~!"
I can't bear to hear and watch it till the end.
My eyes and ears will murder me.
We all bleed the same, and we all bleed through this life the same...
Submitted by Dr. Destructo on September 7, 2008 - 1:17am.
I'm sure it's her "thing."
Did you ever see "The Adventures of Ford Fairlaine? She reminds me so much of Kyle Troy, or whatever his name was.
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The future Mrs. Jensen Ackles.
Damn it! I got curious and watched a few seconds before reaching for some ipecac! Does Tombstone Teeth Miley always sound like she's singing with a stuffed nose?
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Every normal man must be tempted at times to spit on his hands, hoist the black flag, and begin slitting throats-H.L. Mencken
Yup, that's her. I fuckin' loved her in the tudors. its not gonna be the same without her this year.
-sera-
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JLo, stop hitting me in the mouth with your 12-inch dildo! I'm not going to suck it!
ubmitted by ZiggyStardust on September 7, 2008 - 1:14am.
Xtina ohOHoHOHohOHOHOHOHOHHohohohohohOHOHOHOhohhH AgWAILera
Heh heh. Nice.
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The future Mrs. Jensen Ackles.
Ahaha - classic title to this post!
Unfortunately, BeyYANCe lacks the knowing wit and charm of that classic character.
Oh, and that song is hideous. Truly revolting. Although, perhaps I'm being unfair in my criticism. I had to turn it off when Carrie Underwood made an appearance.
The only thing that could have made that worse would be if Xtina ohOHoHOHohOHOHOHOHOHHohohohohohOHOHOHOhohhH AgWAILera showed up.
They could have all stayed at home and just given away most of their undeserved fortunes if they really wanted to make any kind of difference.
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Are we sure Xtina has not passed on and her final request was to be embalmed standing up holding a bottle of her nasty perfume?- DivasGone
I don't know how my shit posted twice like that, but my bad!
-sera-
¤¤
JLo, stop hitting me in the mouth with your 12-inch dildo! I'm not going to suck it! - MK
Bradi,
*moves closer*
I dub the Sweetcheeeeeks!
Boob,
*fingers crossed*
Good luck!!
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I BET IF SOMEONE KICKED ME IN THE BALLS AND PUT SOME BACKGROUND MUSIC BEHIND ME, I WOULD SOUND JUST LIKE JUSTIN TIMBERFAG!! - jim
Sera, is that whatshername from the Tudors? She is so beautiful. I have a straight-up non-lesbian girl crush on her.
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The future Mrs. Jensen Ackles.
Dear Ladies trying to be Divas,
Beyonce, nobody's fooled. You wore your hair like that so you'd be taller than everybody else. No talent bitch.
Fuggie Fug, what the fuck is up with that voice? You sound like a tranny with a head cold.
Mariah, stop the fucking slow-mo, soulful headshake. You look like a slow basset hound.
White Pants, I don't know who you are nor do I care. Your hair looked stupid.
Miley, fuck. You really can't sing.
MJB, you were cool. You are class.
Short Blond Chick, you're nothing special.
Guy With Mustache in Audience, you looked ridiculous.
Love and Kisses!
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The future Mrs. Jensen Ackles.
Andi sounds soooo cute. I do like Bradi better tho =(
Hey, temporary bye.
Clarisse, my girl, I'm gonna sneak back into bed and see if I can get vindicated for my pathetic attempt of Get Laid Friday.
Mwah!
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"Writing that made my eyeballs fart." MK
http://www.fotolog.com/justmemyselfandi
Blanche wore it better f'sho.....
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"This is straight up fuckery."
His Holiness MK, 9/03/08
Clarisse on September 6, 2008 - 12:07pm
You can call me whatever you want....
*does provocative eyebrow raise*
I had to change, change is good, it's fine, everything is fine.
...aka BRADIFUL BITCH, I SWEAR!!!...
They just fucked Etta over...that's sad.
anywhoo - get on with it MK! did solange get her ass waxed by beyonce or what?
-sera-
¤¤
JLo, stop hitting me in the mouth with your 12-inch dildo! I'm not going to suck it!
Ando, perhaps?
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Keep on keepin' on.
For all you haters, it's....Bible In a Minute!
Miley should stick to Myspace slutting. That's about the only natural talent she has.
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"I think we'll need some more FBI guys."
Ta for now El Bastardo....
So, how many Taco's did Beyonce Pop to get this role?
...aka BRADIFUL BITCH, I SWEAR!!!...
Ciao El B! Enjoy the game!
Bradi!
What do we call you now? Andi? I am so confused!
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I BET IF SOMEONE KICKED ME IN THE BALLS AND PUT SOME BACKGROUND MUSIC BEHIND ME, I WOULD SOUND JUST LIKE JUSTIN TIMBERFAG!! - jim
Test test test... yadda yadda yadda, so on and so forth... Martha needs to shower...
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Keep on keepin' on.
Bible In a Minute!
They just fucked Etta over...that's sad.
anywhoo - get on with it MK! did solange get her ass waxed by beyonce or what?
-sera-
¤¤
JLo, stop hitting me in the mouth with your 12-inch dildo! I'm not going to suck it!
Byez Bastardito!
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"Writing that made my eyeballs fart." MK
http://www.fotolog.com/justmemyselfandi
Bye Clarisse, Boobs and Bradi....Love Anderson :o)
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"Bless me, Father, for I have sinned. I did an original sin. I poked a badger with a spoon." "Say five Hail Mary's and six Hello Dolly's!"
Poison Candy Apple on September 6, 2008 - 12:03pm
Mornin' Hobag!!!
It's been a while since I've seen you here.....
♥ you Miss.
...aka BRADIFUL BITCH, I SWEAR!!!...
You know if she ever gets cancer, they'll drag out this picture to accompany the story.
That thing on her head ALMOST made the little perfomance tolerable....but Miley pushed it over the shit line.
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Bitch sounded like The Chipettes gone reggae. -MK
That was wonderfull!!! AND on that note...BYEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!! :o)
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"Bless me, Father, for I have sinned. I did an original sin. I poked a badger with a spoon." "Say five Hail Mary's and six Hello Dolly's!"
Oh, the wig- she looked like Walter Mercado's illegitimate daughter.
Walter below:
http://cache.daylife.com/imageserve/0eoUf399AxdNg/610x.jpg
L♥VE,
PCA
Oh shit! She stole part of Brit's weave! Idiot, next time maybe she'll remember to at least remove the eyes from the pelt!
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Every normal man must be tempted at times to spit on his hands, hoist the black flag, and begin slitting throats-H.L. Mencken
Oh, Fuck! That.was.whooorrrendous! *groaning* *clutching chest* *gasp* *falls face forward* *dead faint* *little sock monkey tail twisting in the wind*
~"~"~"~"~~Mess with me and I'll bite you!.....Monquita Loca~~"~"~"~"~
Submitted by Chris Eccleston... on September 6, 2008 - 9:58am.
You words are absolutely true. but it's indeed scary.
I love Mary and she is a very talented woman, but screeching like a mouse on acid (Beyonce, Mariah) does not make you an icon.
Mariah might be named as such cause she is part of a generation (long gone if I may) and when she's not doing odd things she sounds awesome.
And I do like things like this, campaigns and shit to support causes. However, IMHO you don't declare yourself an icon..you work your ass off and let it happen. it's the public the one to judge you as such or to bash you.
And Miley Cyrus...I don't think I have enough words to describe how out of place that twat is in there...or in the music industry.
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"Writing that made my eyeballs fart." MK
http://www.fotolog.com/justmemyselfandi
Um, what? Etta James?
Let's see, Etta's voice is deep and flawless, powerful, epic and flawless, did I mention that?
How in Cheesus' asshole is Beyonce qualified?
Thank You Hollyweird for ruining Etta's life on screen.
ps. I do still think Beyonce is pretty, just not as "iconic" as she believes she is.
...aka BRADIFUL BITCH, I SWEAR!!!...
PS. Caramel hair on black girls is SO yesterday it's starting to get on my damn nerves.
♥ ThreadKilla!/Lean Like a Chola/She's a Lady.
"You sicken everyone! Even Michael Jackson!" overheardinnewyork
oK, that song made my skull cave in and my brain melt. Rats on Mars are crying.
Beyonce really loves colors that wash her out. She needs to sit down somewhere.
Fergie. I just have no words.
Who let Miley Cyrus out anyway?
Aside from We Are the World...celebrties and musicians should never ever join forces to sing in "harmony" with one another. Even if it is for charity. That sh** is corny, uncomfortable, and down right brutal to listen to and watch.
P.S. Beyonce, please stop with the blowing kisses to the camera..bootylicious breath is not cute. Thanks!
*****"Don't have sex, because you will get pregnant and die. Don't have sex in the missionary position, don't have sex standing up, just don't do it, OK, promise? OK, now everybody take some rubbers."*****
OMFG. I sat here laughing the entire time. MJB was the only one for sure that sounded gorgeous. ANd wtf is with Fuggie fug and her constant meth shimmy? This is a song about breast cancer, not gyrations from the loin. Fucking moron.
L♥VE,
PCA
Submitted by Boob3rries on September 7, 2008 - 12:56am.
Unfortunately people will be calling her that in a few years. It's totally undeserved, but her people will make damn sure she's known as an icon.
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The future Mrs. Jensen Ackles.
Wow, Miley Cyrus was laughably out of place.
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The future Mrs. Jensen Ackles.
WHAT THE SHIT IS THAT HAIR??? NO LADY, IT IS NOT FITTING YOU!
Ew Beyonce...you will never be at the same height as the peoples you play. i hardly think you will ever be an icon.
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"Writing that made my eyeballs fart." MK
http://www.fotolog.com/justmemyselfandi
I'm horrified that this *thing* is playing Etta James.