Sarah Palin Is A Four-Time Cover Girl
Palin! Palin! Palin! Sarah Palin made the cover of 4 weeklies this week proving that....well...that she has scary teeth. Teeth that could make a moose cry. Poor moosies. I wonder if Sarah also made the cover of "Girls 'n" Guns" magazine too? Probably.
It seems like the story is the same in all of these magazines. SCANDAL! BABIES! LIES! SECRETS! TEETH! KAREN WALKER! MORE LIE-TELLING! SCANDAL!
Basically, the Palin family has become the Spears family of Alaska. Somebody shake Brit Brit from her Vicodin-Cheeto coma and let her know that this Sarah Palin chick is taking her place! I want to see pictures of Brit Brit looking tore-up on all these covers, not this Sarah lady! Come on, Brit! Rob a Starbucks! Slap the artificial cheese out of Chester Cheetah! Anything! Handle it.
OK! Magazine went with a double cover this week. Michelle and Barack Obama are on one cover and Palin and Trig are on the other. Oh and Carrie thinks Jessica is fat, because she is fat! Fat in the mouth!
VIA Cover Awards
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I've decide I'm Pro-Asscrack. I'm going to the Plumbers Union right now.
Being so called pro-life is one of the most hypocritical things ever. If you take women their right to deside about THEIR body, health, life and plans, support overpopulation and milk the country budget big time - your karma will punish you with the Dawn synrome baby, just to show you a bit, what a shitty life you prepare for other women.
What you give is what you get, you fundie ho. Happy upbringing!
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Raise against $cientology - Sep. 13th worldwide protest - Also in your city.
http://forums.enturbulation.org/176-september-13th-protest/
Submitted by gladyslove on September 3, 2008 - 2:08pm.
*shakes head incredulously, rolls eyes, chuckles derisively and secretly wishes that this week's paycheck could be as large as the one she receives from the RNC to shill this kind of shit on sites like this one*
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I guess time seems to stretch out when you don't really give a fuck." -- MK, 07/07/08
Her neighbors are Canada and Russia, which means she's dealt with international problems.
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There are people in this world who dress up and act like clowns; I don’t like these people.
this election is bogus. i dont want my future president on the cover of okay magazine. COME ON
☮"This I am today, that I will be tomorrow"
I hate the way Michelle Obama always looks like she's sucking a mouth full of chewing tobacco. ugh.
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RIMADYL KILLS
Oh ya, keep the drama coming! I was sad to see Levi still has a modified mullet.
Submitted by jules10198 on September 3, 2008 - 5:06pm.
Anybody else notice that the Us and OK! covers are reverse images of the same picture?
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I did!
♥ ThreadKilla!/Lean Like a Chola/She's a Lady.
"You sicken everyone! Even Michael Jackson!" overheardinnewyork
At the risk of pissing many people off: uuhh, sorry baby Lion King is not that cute. =X
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"If she's {Jenna Jameson} a devout Catholic, then I'm Mary Full of Grace."
His Holiness MK, 8/25/08
omg, I just read the gladyslove post, it's all complete bullpootimes.
The self actualizing reminds me of many amnesiac lead characters from several LifeTime movies.
On T: She's speakin' tonight at the Rodeo, er, I mean the CONvention. She is bringing Bristol & Levi ON STAGE with her.
It will be in the 10pm hour, all the networks will be airing it.
/\
Madolyn: What do you expect coming in here?
Billy Costigan: I have to come here.
Madolyn: I know you have to come here, but now that you're here, what do you want?
Billy Costigan: You want the truth? Valium.
Anybody else notice that the Us and OK! covers are reverse images of the same picture?
All I can think about is the "South Park" episode where they're trying to vote on a school mascot, and the choices are "Giant Douche" and "Turd Sandwich."
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Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind. --Dr. Seuss
PS TT99
Thank you so for your ever-evolving true life Sarah Palin story! She should just, at some point, pretend that's how it all went down - just for fun, you know? ;p
♥ ThreadKilla!/Lean Like a Chola/She's a Lady.
"You sicken everyone! Even Michael Jackson!" overheardinnewyork
Submitted by gladyslove on September 3, 2008 - 2:08pm.
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So fun you are - I'm having a bitchy moment and need an outlet...so thanks:)
It is truly amazing and sad that you people make assumptions about people with conservative viewpoints--you have these little images in your minds don't you?
I have an SUV and a beetle and a 61 impala bubbletop and a 56 cadillac, a 48 buick, an old Chevy pickup to name a few.
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Like Your Mom said: YIKES! Pollute much?
PLUS you are obviously so very greedy.
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I run an equestrian facility on 200 acres in some of the most beautiful country in the west.
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More greed. Ever let high-need kids use that facility for free? Bet you don't.
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I don't have manicures or bleached hair. I dress casually every day and have a college education.
And I am all woman. I can work on a John Deere and ride horses during the day and then put on a dress with my diamonds and go out at night.
I am a mother and a wife and a daughter.
I have never, ever taken Vicodin or any other pain med except for Advil.
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Fair enough - I can relate to that. Poo on you for ruining my fun. Except I'm also a friend and a neighbour and a volunteer. Ah - that's better.
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It must chap your ass that I am a regular person with views that are opposed to yours.
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Not at all. But I can see why you'd think that given how chapped your silly as is all the time.
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If it wasn't for people who loved their country, were willing to bear arms and volunteer do you think that you could be sitting on your butts spouting your poison.
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Yes, I do. I believe that everything we have today we'd have anyway. Human beings are insatiably creative and driven in almost any atmosphere.
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You would be speaking German or Japanese or Arabic.
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And I would hardly give a fuck had that been the case. I mean, really - look how hard it is to fathom anything we haven't experienced. It just wouldn't matter. ALSO - I do believe we've just picked a language that works the best, at the end of the day.
Would any one of you serve your country to protect your precious freedom of speech????? I thought not. Hypocrites!
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Hypcrites!?!? I think the real issue is WHY DO I HAVE TO FIGHT MY COUNTRY FOR FREEDOM OF SPEECH? WHEN WILL MY COUNTRY LISTEN TO MEEEEEEEEEEEEEE? If you wanna talk about hypocrisy. I'm so wrapped up in those questions I haven't even had time to think of fighting to protect the country. Never mind the fact that I think it's pretty damn silly to think that anyone could defeat America in battle, at this point - if there's one thing y'all have flourished at it's being warriors, I'll tell you what.
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What kind of people are you? What do you contribute to society, except your hatred and jealousy?
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Actually - one of the reasons I hardly make any money is because I like to work with people who can't afford anything. So I often don't get paid - even though I've put a good $100,000 into my education and skill development throughout the course of my life. I am often jealous - it's true, but I figure if I'm jealous then what I'm really experiencing is the development of a new goal. I hate no one. Even people I hate are just people. I say "hate" cuz I need to move through the emotion but, quite honestly, there are not too many people I wouldn't go out of my way for if I thought it would do any good.
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You should thank whoever you hold in high esteem and be glad for the conservatives of this country. They have kept you safe, they provided for your social programs and public schools and all of the fringe benefits that you leech off of. Who the hell do you think keeps this country running???
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Wow - aren't they also the people who called ketchup a "vegetable"? The same people who allow big business to NEVER pay their taxes (practically), throw money at them, annually, for "development", refuse to maintain libraries and community centres and believe that no one deserves free health care?
Well. Now I know who to thank:)
And thanks to you. I can now go deal with my kid rationally, having worked that little bitch kink out of my brain. Much appreciated.
PS. I'm Canadian but registered to vote there. Cool huh?:)
♥ ThreadKilla!/Lean Like a Chola/She's a Lady.
"You sicken everyone! Even Michael Jackson!" overheardinnewyork
What she didn't make the cover of "Flute Blower and Wolf Skinner Monthly" that's a disgrace..
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Most of what you worry about, never happens..
http://www.myspace.com/akathornhill
Submitted by speakit on September 3, 2008 - 4:50pm.
Dude, this could be a musical! Man, I gotta go. Now I have to think about wardrobes and makeup and sets! And with all the money of Fox News behind this thing? I just gotta audition John Deere!
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"I'll go unlock the kids and make us all breakfast." - Theodore Bagwell
Submitted by TT99 on September 3, 2008 - 4:47pm.
Submitted by speakit on September 3, 2008 - 4:35pm.
I'm aiming for Oscar Gold!!!!
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Don't stop there! Take it to Broadway and you could win a Tony!
Submitted by speakit on September 3, 2008 - 4:35pm.
I'm aiming for Oscar Gold!!!!
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"I'll go unlock the kids and make us all breakfast." - Theodore Bagwell
Submitted by TT99 on September 3, 2008 - 4:32pm.
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I smell an Emmy.
Submitted by gladyslove on September 3, 2008 - 2:08pm.
Dear Gladys,
I briefly read your rant. Perhaps you are connected with the higher-ups at FOX News. That could be an possible outlet for my new Film, "The Darker Shade of Palin." It is a highly anticipated epic film that has been shopped by Lifetime, Cable Access Channel 6 in Central Jersey, and other prestigious Internet outlets.
Your knowledge of horses, Vicodin and guns can maybe be worked into my very important script (See below) , I dunno. I'm still reworking it. And who is John Deere? Can he play Levi? Mr. Ling from 4C totally bailed, so I need a replacement. Perhaps you can help with casting. And your sprawling estate can be the set. Lemme know. This movie is gonna be the shit!
the opening scene:
Sarah, putting her hair in a bun, backstage at the VP introduction rally, gets tapped in the shoulder by Bristol.
BRISTOL: Mom, there's something I have to tell you. You're gonna shit yourself when you hear this, and it's gonna fuck up your life just like you fucked up MINE!
Sarah grabs Bristol by the neck and slams her against the wall. The McCain aides look on in disbelief. They talk into their wrist walkie-talkies, but do nothing in the current situation.
SARAH: You little BITCH! I'm not gonna let you sabotage the most important day of my life! WHAT! WHAT IS IT!
BRISTOL: I'M PREGNANT! And it's Levi's BABY!!
Dramatic Music, End Scene
The Intro scene makes sense after you see this flashback scene. See, Sarah and Levi were having an affair the WHOLE TIME! Oh Lifetime HAS to buy my script. I've spent like 12 whole minutes on it. The plot development is stellar.
Flashback Scene. Levi is putting on his clothes about to leave Sarah's governor’s office
LEVI: We can't tell Bristol about this, it'll ruin her life. Especially if she finds out that the baby you're carrying, is, is actually, MINE!
SARAH: Levi, I'll never tell her. Unless I get really fucking pissed off at her one day and it slips out in an accidental rage.
LEVI: Okay, cool. just like try not to, cause like I know your like the governor and like you might wanna be like the VP one day. Like I don't wanna like ruin your chances.
SARAH: Don't worry. Oh, and your pants are on backwards sweetie.
End scene
The "Accidental Rage Scene"
At The Applebee's, Just Mom and Daughter, Begin Scene:
BRISTOL: Mom, I was thinking, maybe I could get a car since Track got one when he turned 16...
SARAH: honey, you know we love Track better than you. Besides everyone knows you're the school, I mean, town - slut, and we're certainly not gonna reward you with a fucking car!
Bristol's jaw drops open and her jalapeno popper falls out
BRISTOL: The only boy I ever banged was Levi, and we're getting married once he sells his pickup!
SARAH: Married! (Laughs) Is THAT what HE told you?
Sarah stands up, about to throw her breadsticks at Bristol, she takes a swig of her can of Pabst Blue Ribbon…
SARAH: Just so you know, this baby I'm carrying, it's not your father's! I haven't banged that guy since Clinton was President. I don't even know who YOUR Father is! It could be ANYBODY’S! But This baby right here?? (She points to her own belly) This one is LEVI's!!! And I'm keeping it!!!!
Bristol runs away in tears. End scene
Added Scene. Sarah tries to hire a hitman to Kill the Alaska Public Safety Commissioner.
It's raining. Sarah enters the passenger side of a parked car where a strange man is sitting. He's heavyset, and even though it's Alaska, he has a Brooklyn accent. It’s midday, but thunder looms in the background.
SARAH: (Hands him a Picture and an envelope with Money) This is the guy I need you to um, ‘Bump Away.’
MOB GUY: Bump away?
SARAH: ‘Rub off.’
MOB GUY: Rub off?
SARAH: Killed, I need you to KILL him, this guy, KILL HIM!
MOB GUY: Why didn't you say so? I can do that. Who is he?
SARAH: He works for me, he's the Public Safety Commissioner.
MOB GUY: Why don't you just fire him. It's cheaper. Besides, I don't know you're from, but this $267 dollars you just handed me isn't enough to get a guy ‘bumped away’ in Anchorage.
He hands her back the envelope with the picture and the money. She leaves the car and speeds off on her snowmobile. End scene.
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"I'll go unlock the kids and make us all breakfast." - Theodore Bagwell
Gladys is probably busy embarrassing herself on another board. lol. My kiddos need me the rest of the day. :o)
Oh what the hell, lets have another round...*clink*
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I'm your huckleberry...BITCH!!
Stoney
OMG you probably should see it because it's a classic - but it's def not for the weak at heart. Have some cocktails first. Most men are not too fond of it though.
Clarisse
Pimpcessa,
Seems Gladdy is a one of those ultra-conservs...not a lot of working grey matter...
Whatever! Maybe her hubby "Bubba" needed her out in the yard to help him fix a transmission??
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I'm your huckleberry...BITCH!!
Thanks Clarisse! Verah cool, indeed!
*raises glass right back* Cheers to you!
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Did you say, "he was E-moaning?!"
Nitty,
I was raisin my glass to you serving your country. Cheers!
Pimpcessa,
Seems Gladdy is a one of those ultra-conservs...not a lot of working grey matter...
*sings*
Jesus loves me this i know, cuz my government tells me so...
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Fuck off! I'm the Queen!
Submitted by Pimpcessa on September 3, 2008 - 2:11pm.
I know I should, and of course I've heard of it, but I've alas, never seen Deliverance. I heard it was a redneck classic, though.
*hangs head in shame*
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"that is not a common looking vagina right?"
Sorry, Clarisse..I missed the entire convo myself. I just saw on the side, "I was in the Navy," and had to peek in and see who it was that said it.. So unfortunately, I can't take any of the ass kicking credit, I'm afraid! LOL
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Did you say, "he was E-moaning?!"
Clarisse
I had to go to a meeting and missed Gladyass' nonsense, and i'm too lazy to read it, but...
You didn't miss much darling. And she's pretty easy to stump. She just needed a military kick in the teeth!
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I'm your huckleberry...BITCH!!
I had to go to a meeting and missed Gladyass' nonsense, and i'm too lazy to read it, but...
CHEERS Nitty and Pimp!
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Fuck off! I'm the Queen!
Stoney
Haha, I was actually referring to the banjo boys from "Deliverance". Remember that movie?
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I'm your huckleberry...BITCH!!
NitWitty
Pimp, 83-88..Navcommu Cutler then NAS Sigonella!
Glad to know ya!
Honored, Love. Glad to know you too!!
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I'm your huckleberry...BITCH!!
Submitted by Pimpcessa on September 3, 2008 - 1:59pm.
Banjos in the background!! Bwahahahahahah! My boss and I have this running joke that I call all music I don't like "banjo music" and he happens to love Hank Williams Jr., Dylan and the like.
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"that is not a common looking vagina right?"
Pimp, 83-88..Navcommu Cutler then NAS Sigonella!
Glad to know ya!
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Did you say, "he was E-moaning?!"
NitWitty
1988-1992 Fighter Squadron VF-101, NAS Oceana. And you?
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I'm your huckleberry...BITCH!!
Submitted by Pimpcessa on September 3, 2008 - 1:39pm.
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When were you in? I was in the Navy too :)
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Did you say, "he was E-moaning?!"
Thats funny. Have a great day/night to all.
applehead
You are quite welcome. (wink)
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I'm your huckleberry...BITCH!!
Stoney
I have an SUV and a beetle and a 61 impala bubbletop and a 56 cadillac, a 48 buick, an old Chevy pickup to name a few.
Those are very atmospherically friendly vehicals! Good for you! Thanks for putting out more carbons than the Jolie-Pitts, you fucking planet-killer.
No worries Stoney, somehow I get the impression that all those cars are up on blocks in her front yard right next to her rusted washing machine and beat up Lazy Boy recliner. Oh and don't forget the banjo sounds in the background.
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I'm your huckleberry...BITCH!!
gladyslove went back to running the country.....
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"TEDDY'S BACK!"
Submitted by Stoney on September 3, 2008 - 2:29pm.
Maybe it's all the first 48hrs and The Shield I've been watching! :-)
Submitted by Pimpcessa on September 3, 2008 - 2:33pm.
Oh and, gladyslove, that was just 4 years of my life - what the hell have you done for your country?? And anytime you want to thank me for making sure you have the right to vocalize your opinion you can start NOW!
Shit, I'll start! Thanks for your service!
Oh I think military people are very proud of the principle of what they do. And they should be. I know plenty a military person that is ashamed of Bush and what he has done and what they have to do because of him. That's all part of it though. You have to serve as you are told to serve. It is a shame they have to serve in Iraq. But it's a fine line you know? On the one hand....they should be proud in one way. But on the other...it's very difficult to figure out how they really feel. And many certainly don't feel they can speak what they truly feel about it. But think about combat training and all that. Those guys and gals don't have time to think about the politics usually. They are engrossed in the combat. I mean militaries are set up to do that right? And we're talking a majority of very young people as well who maybe haven't formed their true political beliefs just yet.
And I'm sure the dead African who gave his life so you could wash off the mud and be sparkly thanks you, too.
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"that is not a common looking vagina right?"
speakit
You are the woman. Damn girl. Im gonna buy you a drink.
Awwwww. I wasn't the only woman there either but every one of us in the military at that time (that I knew) were proud to do it. I wonder how many military men and women are proud today?
Oh and I'll have Stoli & soda with a splash of OJ, thanks.
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I'm your huckleberry...BITCH!!
There is a header story on yahoo canada, stating that Angelina's messed up father, went on a verbal rampage and called obama supporters lunatics and also claimed that obama should become an actor instead of trying to be president. Even though i don't like angelina, i hope that she continues to distance herself from her father, she doesn't need any "guilt by association" accusations made against her.
Submitted by gladyslove on September 3, 2008 - 1:08pm.
I have an SUV and a beetle and a 61 impala bubbletop and a 56 cadillac, a 48 buick, an old Chevy pickup to name a few.
Those are very atmospherically friendly vehicals! Good for you! Thanks for putting out more carbons than the Jolie-Pitts, you fucking planet-killer.
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"that is not a common looking vagina right?"
hoozer
Any friggin time babe! I had a blast in the Navy. got to go to Key West on detachment 2 weeks out of the month if I wanted (every month). We had a permanant Det down there to train the student pilots air combat maneuvers. The Duvall Crawl days!
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I'm your huckleberry...BITCH!!
Yeah really. NO surprise she has tons of cars and is dripping with diamonds. lol.
Submitted by Pimpcessa on September 3, 2008 - 2:30pm.
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You are the woman. Damn girl. Im gonna buy you a drink.
Well seeing the country fucked is still better than watching it be raped.