Michael Lohan Is Engaged (But It's Not Official)
Michael Lohan has confirmed to E! that he's engaged, but it's not official. Yeah, what?! Michael asked his longtime girlfriend Erin Muller to be his wife, but he's not ready to announce anything. The man is not good in the brains. Fucking White Oprah is bad for your mental health.
Michael said, "We picked out a ring, but it's not official." He said they will officially announce their engagement when "some family issues are resolved." He doesn't realize what he's saying. Somebody please pack Michael a paper bag lunch and immediately put his dumb ass on the short bus.
The family issues Michael is talking about have to do with his father's health. He's also waiting to find out if he's the father of 13-year-old Ashley Kaufman. The paternity test results still have not come in. I don't know why they went through the trouble of getting a DNA test. They could have just asked Ashley what 1 +1 is. If she said, "HUH?" then we know she's related to Michael.
Michael, being the mega famewhore that he is, also talked to E! about SamRo. He said, "People like Samantha Ronson don't need to be around Lindsay. She shouldn't be dragging Lindsay around nightclubs. Who was Samantha Ronson before Lindsay Lohan? She was nobody. She is using her for her own gain. All these people have inserted themselves into her life like parasites, and it's not right. I'm done with them." Again. Put him on the short bus NOW! Words are coming out of his mouth, but he has no idea what he's saying. Who's calling who a fucking user?
And Erin needs to take a good look at the cell phone strapped to Michael's waist. That says it all.
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who cares about this loser nobody?
Cute couple. They appear to be happy. But I saw his personal ID on wealthy men personals site""""""C e l e b C u p i d.c o m""""" yesterday. What is he looking for on that site? Looking for sugarbabe?
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Really really important people wear cell phones on their belt, so everyone knows they are really really important people.
Ahem, cough, choke, I am sure she will. :)
Wear it with pride.
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pathetic is chatting with bitch of crazy mouth
Funny Bitch LoLo as FLA
Thanks EEG, my friend of a friend will be very happy to hear that. ;]
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"I think we'll need some more FBI guys."
Mr. Prez,
I know Mk has a hate on for the phone on the belt but bitch please! I put it in my purse and I can never reach the fucker in time OR keypad lock goes off and some unfortunate (usually my mom) ends up listening to stuff she really shouldn't.
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pathetic is chatting with bitch of crazy mouth
Funny Bitch LoLo as FLA
OK, I've heard a lot of comments about the cell phone on the belt and I'm curious. Um, not for myself of course but for a friend of a friend. Does that mean you're a douchebag? Because having a cell phone on the belt is really practical, um, that's what the friend told me anyway.
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"I think we'll need some more FBI guys."
Any chick who would agree to marry this douchetard should be fitted for a straight jacket, not an engagement ring.
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"I think we'll need some more FBI guys."
They'll officially announce their engagement after they iron out the terms of the prenup. After all, Erin needs to protect her assets.
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I didn’t say that it was your fault – I said that I was going to blame you.
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I have a room to paint, so I'm leaving a vat of my pumpkin soup for y'all to feast on while I'm gone. Enjoy.
"Submitted by letinstar on August 26, 2008 - 9:45pm.
ugh...this ass found another woman stupid enough to be his wife..."
My sentiments exactly.
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"You don't remember the motorcycle gang? Doing the striptease in front of them at the bar? The iguana? Good God, man. Tell me you remember the iguana!"
Submitted by Sheeps on August 26, 2008 - 8:38pm.
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Jesus, Sheeps, dont you know how to do anything right? Your seminotsomuchkinda engagement is SOOOO not complete without a) an officially unofficial statement to any source of media that will listen, stating that you're unofficially kinda sorta engaged until further notice and b)you unofficially kinda-sorta have to wait until party L and party A's checks clear before you can afford the HSN first payment on your diamonelle engagement ring for your famewhore slutfornow. Cuteness...
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Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...
ugh...this ass found a another woman stupid enough to be his wife...
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the world is great big old place for all of us to fuck up in it...
I picked out a ring for my fiancee, too. It's like 3 carats or something and ultra expensive and shiny. I plan to get it for her as soon as I have lots of money and we're officially engaged.
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if your firme with me, im firme with you simple as that.
Is it normal procedure to care about the marital/relationship status of celebrity/famous parents? If it is, I would like to know if Bill Gates' dad is available. I haven't really planned for my retirement so I need a little Billy of my own.
Time for this asswipe to get flushed down the toilet. And he can take Dinah and Hohan with him.
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"I think we'll need some more FBI guys."
This just in...
I'm engaged, but it's not official...
We now return to your regular DListed programming...
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Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...
Submitted by Mrs.Kravitz on August 26, 2008 - 7:21pm.
Submitted by Tigerlilly on August 26, 2008 - 4:59pm.
So true TL..may I call you TL?
And I almost said that same exact thing to my friend but she seemed so happy thinking about freckle faced little Lindsay.
Hollywood will fuck with your soul for sure.
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You have earned the status of calling me a dumb whore if you want...It's an honor to be called a dumb whore by Mrs. Kravitz, cuz who else is gonna keep tabs on Samantha and Darren? ;-)
No, I just can't spread my sympathy so far as to genuinely feel sorry for the likes of Hollywood stage BRATS, when there are kids that have it so much worse.
Yes, it's wrong for these parents to whore out their kids, but look what the ones that succeed often do. Your kid or my kid would be in prison for what Lindsay Lohan did, and because she was given TOO MUCH, TOO SOON she gets ANY sympathy, ANY breaks???? Are you fucking kidding me???? Boofuckin'hoo...
Look, if my low rent trouble making kid goes to jail, so should your snot nosed privileged gold plated twat turd...and I don't even have kids!
It's not that I have no compassion, it's that these bottom feeding Hollywood whores are testing it.
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Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...
Submitted by Hysteria on August 26, 2008 - 7:44pm.
he just announced that he wants to fight K-fed. the international community is hanging on his every breath
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too funny!
http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1172613656
Submitted by Tigerlilly on August 26, 2008 - 4:59pm.
So true TL..may I call you TL?
And I almost said that same exact thing to my friend but she seemed so happy thinking about freckle faced little Lindsay.
Hollywood will fuck with your soul for sure.
-☮'---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮-
An unstoppable force of knowledge, Big Toe’s got the scoop on all the latest info, and knows what’s going down at all times... Except for when it comes to you. What’s up with you? Big Toe wants to know.
He's probably right about Sam...let her stay on that one for as long as she can cause being a DJ and a Ronson will not guarantee her any fame.
Your face!
So...it's officially unofficial...great.
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Ohhhh, I wish I was in front with a sign that said SHOW ME YOUR TATAS! Looks like she got a good pair for her money. But what the hell is she doing with him ...?!
I think the perfect woman for Michael is our own Pheobe Price. Both are perfect delusional fame whores.
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"We picked out a ring, but it's not official."
So you haven't made it to the bottom of the Cracker Jacks box to actually find the ring yet?
There is no darkness but ignorance.
What force is more potent than love?
Submitted by Mrs.Kravitz on August 26, 2008 - 6:11pm.
Submitted by Tigerlilly on August 26, 2008 - 4:08pm.
Ooops, my bad!
DON'T EAT ME PLEASE.
My friend saw The Parent Trap recently and she was going on and on about how cute and talented Lindsay was.
Sigh.
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No! No eating Mrs. K ever...Her wisdom is more delicious and valuable than her meat...(no offense, lookin' good and tasty, Toots...)
Here's my theory about child actors...Kids like to pretend and play games and such. Given encouragement, A LOT of them are naturals in terms of "acting".
That doesn't mean they are necessarily going to grow up to be talented adults. The nature of childhood is to pretend, the nature of adulthood is hard cold reality...
The child actors who make it as adults talent wise either: a) have some inexplicable inborn talent (almost NEVER happens) or b) do not have sunshine and cotton candy blown up their asses upon first success, but strive and WORK for the next role as an actor.
The days of Jodie Fosters are virtually over due to Hollywood's culture of EXTREME narcissism which has always existed but not to this extent, and ALSO society's own narcissism...It's epidemic...IMHO
Lindsay Lohan is NOT an adult actor. She needs to humble herself and study the craft. She has no gift....
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Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...
Cute couple. They appear to be happy. But I saw his personal ID on wealthy men personals site""""""C e l e b C u p i d.c o m""""" yesterday. What is he looking for on that site? Looking for sugarbabe?
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he just announced that he wants to fight K-fed. the international community is hanging on his every breath.
OH SHIZZ...i just remembered that ML marrying this beeyatch means that there might be more Lohan's!!!! Holy crappity shizz...imma gonna hide now.
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I fart in your general direction. Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries. Now, go away or I shall taunt you a second time!!
Who would want to marry into that family?????
The IQ of your children would be less than paper.
This Erin Muller chick is an epic failure as a gold digger. How lucky she is to have found herself a nice famewhore (que eyeroll)
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"I want a butt ugly slut with a bad drankin' problem and jealous old man in jail "- Roger Alan Wade
Pffffffffffft!!! *sprays air-freshener*
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I fart in your general direction. Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries. Now, go away or I shall taunt you a second time!!
...why do I think he's wearing dark socks with sandals and smells like Old Spice?....
Doesn't his girlfriend/fiance look a lot like Alex Rodriguez's estranged wife?
I've got to say, the whole Lohan-Whorehan family is a bunch of twats.
She'll dump him once K-fed kicks his ass.
Submitted by Tigerlilly on August 26, 2008 - 4:08pm.
Submitted by Mrs.Kravitz on August 26, 2008 - 6:02pm.
Submitted by Tigerlilly on August 26, 2008 - 3:52pm.
I love how he's 'waiting to announce' his engagement to a nobody
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He's a nobody as well.
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GASP! Bite your tongue, Mrs. Kravitz! He is Michael Lohan, the sperminator of such legendary talent as Lindsay and Ali Lohan, not to mention the ex-husband of Dina Lohan herself, the best mother, like, EVER (or at least since mama Spears)...Please, give the proper DListed respect...(a loud smelly fart will do if you feel you cannot produce a proper poo baby in MLo's honor...)
;-)
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He's also so circumspect, discreet, and media-shy.
:()
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I didn’t say that it was your fault – I said that I was going to blame you.
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Submitted by Tigerlilly on August 26, 2008 - 4:08pm.
Ooops, my bad!
DON'T EAT ME PLEASE.
My friend saw The Parent Trap recently and she was going on and on about how cute and talented Lindsay was.
Sigh.
-☮'---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮-
An unstoppable force of knowledge, Big Toe’s got the scoop on all the latest info, and knows what’s going down at all times... Except for when it comes to you. What’s up with you? Big Toe wants to know.
Submitted by Tigerlilly on August 26, 2008 - 4:08pm.
ROTFLMAO!!!!! *snortle* *co-workers staring* *running to ladies' room*
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I didn’t say that it was your fault – I said that I was going to blame you.
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Submitted by Mrs.Kravitz on August 26, 2008 - 6:02pm.
Submitted by Tigerlilly on August 26, 2008 - 3:52pm.
I love how he's 'waiting to announce' his engagement to a nobody
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He's a nobody as well.
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GASP! Bite your tongue, Mrs. Kravitz! He is Michael Lohan, the sperminator of such legendary talent as Lindsay and Ali Lohan, not to mention the ex-husband of Dina Lohan herself, the best mother, like, EVER (or at least since mama Spears)...Please, give the proper DListed respect...(a loud smelly fart will do if you feel you cannot produce a proper poo baby in MLo's honor...)
;-)
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Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...
Will SamMANtha be his best man at the wedding?
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I didn’t say that it was your fault – I said that I was going to blame you.
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Submitted by Tigerlilly on August 26, 2008 - 3:52pm.
I love how he's 'waiting to announce' his engagement to a nobody
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He's a nobody as well.
-☮'---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮-
An unstoppable force of knowledge, Big Toe’s got the scoop on all the latest info, and knows what’s going down at all times... Except for when it comes to you. What’s up with you? Big Toe wants to know.
Erin is the very personification of a slack-jawed moron..
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Most of what you worry about, never happens..
http://www.myspace.com/akathornhill
Behind those "Gas station, Blu Blocker shades lies a vast tundra of sand between her ears. I can hear a coyote howling in the background and vision tumbleweed rolling thru the desolate dunes.
_________________ ☮ ___________________
Most of what you worry about, never happens..
http://www.myspace.com/akathornhill
Nice bracelets.
http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1172613656
I love how he's 'waiting to announce' his engagement to a nobody...like anyone gives a horse's turd! I mean, fuck, the next time I get my whorish ass engaged, Imagonna annouce the egagement is not official...
In fact, *clearing tiger throat*...I'm engaged to some random, stupid tiger dick who thinks I'm someone, but I'm not. However, the engagement is not official...Yeah, that's all...no questions...Really, respect our privacy, an official announcement is on its way after my next round of media whoring and if the check from my daughter clears...
Yeah, I'm liking this...Look for future unofficial engagement announcements...Seriously, whores, go ahead and try it, you'll like it. I promise.
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Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...
Erin went out one day to get some douche. I'd say FAIL, but, well... she actually succeeded.
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Renny: The dahlin' from New Orleans.
Team Renny!
Clarisse on August 26, 2008 - 6:32pm
OH MY! He's a little roidy.
He should be an American Gladiator.
I actually owned a Shaun Cassidy album waaaaaay back in the day....I really really lurved him.
/\
Madolyn: What do you expect coming in here?
Billy Costigan: I have to come here.
Madolyn: I know you have to come here, but now that you're here, what do you want?
Billy Costigan: You want the truth? Valium.
Sayonara on August 26, 2008 - 3:04pm.
My thing is this... Why is he confirming anything to a media outlet? No one is checking for him.
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Thats what pisses us all off! Hi Sayonara.
Bradiful,
Because i have 100% anal retentive, i HAD to look and see if it is spelled Sean or Shaun...It is Shaun, but better yet...Check out Sean Cassidy!
http://www.strengthnet.com/models_home.php?id=49
UPGRADE!
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Blah...blah...blah...jack me off and pour me some lemonade. -Michael K
Isn't SamRo's family like high class old money New Yorkers? If anything, Lindsay is very much benefiting from dating SamRo.