Tuesday, August 26th 2008
What The Fuck Happened To Kelly Osbourne?!
Kelly Osbourne left her house in London today looking like she just went toe-to-toe with Vadge's roided-up vagina and LOST! Kelly wouldn't say how she got the shiner.
Kelly, whatever you do, don't blow your nose! My friend recently got a black eye from being a drunken mess and bitches kept telling him not to blow his nose at all! I guess it makes it worse. If you can't blow your nose, how are you going to get the jizz out after facials? That's my question.
Here's more of busted up Kelly with her pretty boyfriend on their way to the doctor's office.
She looks like she is made of dough!
Live every week like it's shark week!
"KELLY OSBOURNE got clattered by a crumbling kitchen in her London home over the weekend – resulting in a nasty shiner. The Radio 1 DJ was laid low over the Bank Holiday with a painful stomach bug that left her housebound.
And when she went to get a glass from a cabinet, disaster struck. The entire unit came off in her hands, bashing her on the bonce".
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That's incredible! The entire unit dismantled and gave her a nice shiner but completely bypassed her nose. What an impressive faulty cabinet!
☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺
"If Mr. McMurphy doesn't want to take his medication orally, I'm sure we can arrange that he can have it some other way. But I don't think that he would like it."
Submitted by xoxoTOE on August 26, 2008 - 9:26pm.
you know, she's looking
a lot like josh from drake
& josh here in this pic.
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I was going to say the same thing! they have matching hair styles! They could be brothers!
That top (especially the sleeves) are just not becoming on Kelly.
Ha ha...she got punched in the face...it's long overdue!
Exquisite Lucite Heel Fan from Scotland
Awww! poor cutie!
Some chav girl gave her back a bit of her own, I bet. Barfight!
Sandbitch, crusher of dreams! ;-)
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Every normal man must be tempted at times to spit on his hands, hoist the black flag, and begin slitting throats-H.L. Mencken
"KELLY OSBOURNE got clattered by a crumbling kitchen in her London home over the weekend – resulting in a nasty shiner. The Radio 1 DJ was laid low over the Bank Holiday with a painful stomach bug that left her housebound.
And when she went to get a glass from a cabinet, disaster struck. The entire unit came off in her hands, bashing her on the bonce".
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Yeah, sure it did.
Tee Heeeeeeeee!!! Looks like a 2 hit fight! Someone finally got tired (hopefully another girl) of her "Do ewe know who bloody 'ell I am? I'm the Princess a' Fooking Dar.....then BLAM! First hit to the side of the gulliver! Second hit courteously provided by the floor! The only thing that completely blows about this is that no one caught it one tape! I could spend hours watching her flapping mouth kissing the floor!
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Every normal man must be tempted at times to spit on his hands, hoist the black flag, and begin slitting throats-H.L. Mencken
Submitted by xoxoTOE on August 26, 2008 - 10:26pm.
you know, she's looking
a lot like josh from drake
& josh here in this pic.
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Oh my gaw, she does! They could pass as siblings.
She is my favorite. Someone told me she is datting a young billlionaire on """"""C e l e b C u p i d.c o m"""""""". What kind of relationship she is looking for on that site? Long-term relationship or just a date?
you know, she's looking
a lot like josh from drake
& josh here in this pic.
xo
did kelly get donkey punched?
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the world is great big old place for all of us to fuck up in it...
wa ha ! how big is your loaf? Of garlic bread, of garlic bread! mind of the gutter girls!
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My loaf is rising as we speak. Don't eat the soup yet, I've just thrown some streaky bacon on the BBQ.
Submitted by speakit on August 26, 2008 - 6:44pm.
It's not her fault she's big. She obviously got to the blueberry pie of the 'three-course-meal' chewing gum. She should've listened to Willy.
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Violet, you're turning violet
:)
Submitted by Sandbitch on August 26, 2008 - 9:40pm.
my pumpkin soup is thick, just dip anything and suck.
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wa ha ! how big is your loaf? Of garlic bread, of garlic bread! mind of the gutter girls!
It's not her fault she's big. She obviously got to the blueberry pie of the 'three-course-meal' chewing gum. She should've listened to Willy.
Submitted by jussayin on August 26, 2008 - 8:19pm.
hey, is it national Bitch Whuppin' Day and no one told me? Don't play, y'all.
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HOLLAH!!!
Bitch to da whoop
bitch to da whoop...
Uh-uh, Uh- huh, Bitch you get a whoop,
a whoopa
a whoopa
a whoopa
a whoopity, whoop ass whoop, whoop, bitch
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Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...
Submitted by kicking on August 26, 2008 - 7:28pm.
I know we are talking about her eye but that is the biggest gawdamn hair part i've ever seen. it looks like a satellite shot of the great wall of china. there. i'm done.
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Sadly, no, we are also commenting on her weight as if it was our problem and degrading her to the last extent.
The black eye, she did need, maybe a few more hits (and hopefully not from a man) will teach her that daddy's name is not sacred and almighty.
The name-calling, absolutely, completely, utterly uncalled for.
And her hairline is pretty fucking big.
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"Writing that made my eyeballs fart." MK
Submitted by kicking on August 27, 2008 - 11:38am.why thank you darlin'. i have my soup spoon in hand. oh wait! that's not my soup spoon..
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My pumpkin soup is thick, just dip anything and suck.
She's had some "work" done.
Submitted by Sandbitch on August 26, 2008 - 9:33pm.
amen. you get a bowl of my pumpkin soup without even asking, plus a side of buttery garlic bread.
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why thank you darlin'. i have my soup spoon in hand. oh wait! that's not my soup spoon..
Submitted by kicking on August 27, 2008 - 11:28am.
I know we are talking about her eye but that is the biggest gawdamn hair part i've ever seen. it looks like a satellite shot of the great wall of china. there. i'm done.
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amen. you get a bowl of my pumpkin soup without even asking, plus a side of buttery garlic bread.
Lobotomy.
I know we are talking about her eye but that is the biggest gawdamn hair part i've ever seen. it looks like a satellite shot of the great wall of china. there. i'm done.
Would any one like a bowl of my home made baked pumpkin & garlic soup with a swirl of cream and croutons?
hey, is it national Bitch Whuppin' Day and no one told me? Don't play, y'all.
helluva wall she walked into there....
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Hey I ain't trippin cuz the truth is really,
you don't know me- T.I.
Submitted by Momus the Sarcastic on August 26, 2008 - 7:21pm.
Submitted by Tigerlilly on August 26, 2008 - 5:16pm.
Her arms looks marshmallowy to me.
Since you've been a very good girl, you can have them for dessert.
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mmmmmmm...Marshmallow arms...Tastay!
Yeah, you know it's not just that her arms are alarmingly (but deliciously) plump...they have an elderly quality to them too...These are the arms that haunt Vadge in her dreams, hence her own 'roid arms...I'm convinced of it....
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Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...
Fatso probably mouthed off to someone and they didn't give a shit who her drug addict father was.
Thank God it wasn't her mouth or she wouldn't be able to shove those chips down her throat.
Uh....no really..I fell into a doorknob.
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Hmmm....very interesting!
Kelly once dated singer Bert McCracken. He just got married...so maybe in a fit of Jennifer Aniston..erm..I mean rage...she beat her own ass!
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GgeDh1WCyeM
I hate to see a girl all beat up like that. Even this oxygen-thieving bitch.
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"I think we'll need some more FBI guys."
Submitted by Tigerlilly on August 26, 2008 - 5:16pm.
Her arms looks marshmallowy to me.
Since you've been a very good girl, you can have them for dessert.
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I didn’t say that it was your fault – I said that I was going to blame you.
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Submitted by Momus the Sarcastic on August 26, 2008 - 6:18pm.
Submitted by Tigerlilly on August 26, 2008 - 4:01pm.
I kinda hope a ho beat this bitch down...She's a snot nosed little fuck stain, but those meaty arms...those succulent, delectable meaty arm...*drooooools*...Make.Tiger.Hungry!!!!!
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Now, now, TL. Mind your cholesterol and saturated fats intake. You need to remain sleek and swift to stay ahead of the keepers and cubs.
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Oh, no need to worry, I've been a good, good girl...Why just the other day I dug up some root vegetables for lunch...Yes, I believe you humans call them "chipmunks" and "moles"...Interestingly enough, they taste like chicken...
Anywho, I know that Kelly is..."chunky"...a "big girl"..."curvy" and whatever you want to call her landwhale ass, but when she downgraded from landwhale to 'tween manatee (I'm being nice with the 'tween size), did she just lose NOTHING in those meaty delicious grillable arms? I'm just askin'...
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Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...
I NEED to know who did this to her.
I want to send the a MASSIVE box of chocs & flowers to say thanks!
~♥~And, I , I close my eyes
And, I kiss that frog
Each time finding
The more boys I meet the more I love my dog~ The More Boys I Meet, Carrie Underwood~♥~
"When he [Max] laughs, it just lights up my whole world" ~ Christina Aguilera
Submitted by Clotty McClingOn on August 26, 2008 - 5:02pm.
I is needing fat bag after chocklit.
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Never. I firmly believe that chocolate is not fattening. It's all the other foods we eat ... never chocolate.
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I didn’t say that it was your fault – I said that I was going to blame you.
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Submitted by Momus the Sarcastic on August 26, 2008 - 7:56pm.
Also Hefty, as in the brand name for extra-large, very sturdy garbage bags.
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I is knoing, makeing funny. I is needing fat bag after chocklit.
Submitted by Clotty McClingOn on August 26, 2008 - 4:55pm.
Also Hefty, as in the brand name for extra-large, very sturdy garbage bags.
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I didn’t say that it was your fault – I said that I was going to blame you.
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Her boyfriend was probably trying to beat the fug outta her but it only got worse...! (Ok sorry I'm in a bad mood, so sue me!)
Your face!
She is my favorite. Just saw her personals ID on millionaires personals site """""C e l e b C u p i d.c o m"""""" yesterday. I am wondering what kind of relationship she is looking for on that site. Is she single again?
Submitted by Momus the Sarcastic on August 26, 2008 - 7:52pm.
She needs to cover her body with a Hefty bag.
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Hefty is meening fat, rite? So she need to cover herself with Fat Bag?
I just eated a chocklit bar when I ment to eat vegtables.
Submitted by Clotty McClingOn on August 26, 2008 - 4:49pm.
Submitted by NovaNightly on August 26, 2008 - 7:29pm.
I wuz gunna say...where da sungasses? No wun wunts to cee ur porkee fayce.
Rut-roh...I tink Clotty-speek ees cuntageeoos.
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OH MY YES! I is understending you! Sungrasses is misseng! Maybee she needs to cover her eys in Bandades.
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She needs to cover her body with a Hefty bag.
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I didn’t say that it was your fault – I said that I was going to blame you.
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Submitted by NovaNightly on August 26, 2008 - 7:29pm.
I wuz gunna say...where da sungasses? No wun wunts to cee ur porkee fayce.
Rut-roh...I tink Clotty-speek ees cuntageeoos.
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OH MY YES! I is understending you! Sungrasses is misseng! Maybee she needs to cover her eys in Bandades.
She looks like popeye's illegitimate daughter.
~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.
Surfing the apocalypse.
I wuz gunna say...where da sungasses? No wun wunts to cee ur porkee fayce.
Rut-roh...I tink Clotty-speek ees cuntageeoos.
lol
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I fart in your general direction. Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries. Now, go away or I shall taunt you a second time!!
Submitted by Tigerlilly on August 26, 2008 - 4:01pm.
I kinda hope a ho beat this bitch down...She's a snot nosed little fuck stain, but those meaty arms...those succulent, delectable meaty arm...*drooooools*...Make.Tiger.Hungry!!!!!
============
Now, now, TL. Mind your cholesterol and saturated fats intake. You need to remain sleek and swift to stay ahead of the keepers and cubs.
************************************************
I didn’t say that it was your fault – I said that I was going to blame you.
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Fat and ugly. Shame.
"No matter how cynical you become, it's impossible to keep up." - Lily Tomlin
I kinda hope a ho beat this bitch down...She's a snot nosed little fuck stain, but those meaty arms...those succulent, delectable meaty arm...*drooooools*...Make.Tiger.Hungry!!!!!
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Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...