Shauna Sand Is Magic
Sand floating on sand! Only the Empress of Lucite has the power to walk on sand in exquisite lucite heels. Notice how the people around her are in awe of her powers (not really, but go with me on this one)? I'm sure she can walk on water with them too. With exquisite lucite heels on her feet, she can do anything!
The always elegant Shauna Sand brought a whole lot of glamour and beauty to the beaches of Miami this past weekend. I'm sure the emergency rooms were filled with peons who went into cardiac arrest from being that close to Shauna's extreme elegance. Even the dolphins in the ocean bowed before her. Shit, even the sharks curtsied. If you look close enough you can see the crabs in her precious oyster the sand crying because they are in the presence of greatness.
Seriously, her daughter is the luckiest little girl in the world. Even Shiloh Jolie-Pitt jealous.
Source: Bauer-Griffin
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If a woman looks like or even behaves like a whore, she is not nesessarily a bad mother.
Shauna has got a degree in Art, she studied in Paris and she is an intelligent woman. Yes, she behaves hilariously and she dresses excentrically cheap, but that doesn't mean that she is a bad mother. I really don't understand when some of you question ??!healthy tanning??! of her children and don't tell me your kids never got a sunburn.
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Raise against $cientology - Sep. 13th worldwide protest - Also in your city.
http://forums.enturbulation.org/176-september-13th-protest/
I love her bikini...;p
That has to be some rock-hard sand...its probably just gotten a hard on because the Lucite Goddess is gracing it with her presence. ha ha.
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Your garden club called. Their Ho is missing!
C'mon guys, Shauna MUST know what's up. I can't believe anyone wears lucite heels to the beach unironically. Not possible!
wow she just took WHORE to a whole new level I didn't even know it was possible to wear lucite heels on the beach...... wow
:(
George Carlin went to Heaven and left us with Dane Cook here in Hell
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Michael Phelps’ heart pumps twice as much blood as the average human’s heart.Blood made of the failed Olympic dreams of everyone that has raced against him.
This is frightening.
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Madolyn: What do you expect coming in here?
Billy Costigan: I have to come here.
Madolyn: I know you have to come here, but now that you're here, what do you want?
Billy Costigan: You want the truth? Valium.
what a ho!
that's all.
'Heaux Confessionals'
www.myspace.com/triston
thumbnail 4...her ass is caved in...disgusting...
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the world is great big old place for all of us to fuck up in it...
Used to seeing lobster red sunburn; hers looks really deep or something...
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"Someday we'll all be gone but lullabies go on and on...they never die, that's how you and I will be..." -Billy Joel
That child is not tanned. She's got a major sun burn going on. So much that it pains me to look at her.
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http://www.myspace.com/oxygen162
boomsy, no, it's really not. She will see the effects of her mother's neglect in about twenty yrs. or so.
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RIMADYL KILLS
Is it safe for a child to be that tanned?
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"Someday we'll all be gone but lullabies go on and on...they never die, that's how you and I will be..." -Billy Joel
She seriously needs to borrow some a$$ from the right side of this page.
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http://www.myspace.com/oxygen162
you know I just thought about this. she has some MAJOR fucking self esteem issues if she feels the need to wear fucking plastic stripper shoes at every moment of her life. thank god MK can make me laugh at this shit because otherwise its just depressing.
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Fuck 'Em If They Can't Take A Joke
a message from the Church of the SubGenius
...how about a boxing match between Shauna "exquisite lucite heels" Sand vs. Phoebe "chicken cutlets" Price?...that I'd watch...
This does wonders for the Louis Vuitton brand.
this blind item is about SS, they just got the sexes wrong:
Which newly single TV personality tried out his sonorous baritone on young co-eds while vacationing in Mexico? "He was bouncing between college girls like a pinball," says our spy. "His son was there, and it was embarrassing to watch." Even worse, we hear there were no takers. (Rush & Molly****************************1/20/09
"TEDDY'S BACK!"
NO-ASS-AT-ALL!
SO GLAD TO BE ME!
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"All Those Who Wander Are Not Lost."
Fall down, go boom.
I wish.
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Screws fall out all the time, the world's an imperfect place.
Shauna is trolling the sand desperately searching for her next meal ticket (pair o heels). And by the look on her miserable face, no one was interested. Bitch must be panicking over the rent.
I kinda think she looks ok...
*hides*
Minus the shoe choice of course.
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"that is not a common looking vagina right?"
I can just imagine her climbing down a metal fire escape ladder in those heels to avoid being seen by the wife of whomsoever she was banging too close to 5pm.
On a side note, she looks like the mom of one of my friends in high school who would take us to the mall to shop and then buy things for herself from the same section as her daughter would choose from, and she would go out of her way to speak to us in the most up to date slang.
It was weird, but being fourteen we couldn't argue with a free ride. Her friends were kind of skanky too -- not a one of them worked, just shopped and got their nails done.
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"Whenever you feel like criticizing anyone," he told me, "always remember that not everyone has had the same advantages in life that you've had."
www.myspace.com/dreamhypnotique
Is it just me or does her daughter look like she should be Jennifer Anistn offspring?
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"Someday we'll all be gone but lullabies go on and on...they never die, that's how you and I will be..." -Billy Joel
Y'all r jellus h8rz. Keep on chompin' dose cheetos, u'll neva look az gud az 'er! OINK!!@ evry1.
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“Guns don't kill people, people kill people, and monkeys do too (if they have a gun).”
I can barely keep from flopping around when walking in sand BAREFOOT; how the hell is she doing that in heels?
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"Someday we'll all be gone but lullabies go on and on...they never die, that's how you and I will be..." -Billy Joel
You'd think she would have a muscle or two in those legs from having to pick up those shoes. You'd be wrong.
Perfect example of skinny but not in shape.
i think she can walk on water with those things (and i'm not talking about her shoes)
Eep.
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Surfing the apocalypse.
God and I thought my mom in her skirt-suit was embarrassing! That poor kid!
...and we wonder why little girls start whoring it up so young?....I wouldn't want my child seeing this anywhere let alone on the beach....
I don't know what's wrong with me. I think her exquisite lucite powers are possessing me, but I kinda want to buy some lucite heels.
*hides*
Wow, I never noticed how bad her ass looks... and she has absolutely no waist.
Oh, and back to the topic...
I wonder how long SS stood there to be photographed.
Oh, Lord! I'm scrolling down and she's wearing those stupid lucite heels on SAND???
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"Crocs: They are to your eyes what second-hand smoke is to your lungs."
A friend brought me an LV purse back from Canada. I was kinda embarrassed to use it. I knew it was a knock off. My girlfriend was SOOOO AMAZED...she just KNEW it was the real thing. So I used it for a while...one day I was getting out of the car and the cheap ass strap broke. Of course it wasn't zipped closed so all my shit fell out into the parking lot of Wal Mart. I threw that FPOS in the trash and never looked back.
Would it kill her skanky ass to wear a pair of flip flops to the beach? Bet that sand really feels good between the soles of her feet and the whore shoes.
Since when is "burnt sienna" a natural skin color?
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Hi5.
{Trying to say something nice}
From the neck up and from a distance, she doesn't look that bad.
Her daughter is cute, but the poor little thing probably thinks all moms dress like that.
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She's flat and that's that!
PRESENTING THE FABULOUS MOUSE JR
OMG that poor child looks raw. That bitch is too self centered and retarded to notice her daughter is sunburned.....stone her!
Shauna, how do you expect to be a playmate again when you boobs sag that much?
~♥~And, I , I close my eyes
And, I kiss that frog
Each time finding
The more boys I meet the more I love my dog~ The More Boys I Meet, Carrie Underwood~♥~
"When he [Max] laughs, it just lights up my whole world" ~ Christina Aguilera
Isn't she a little to old for a belly ring?
MK, you HAVE to trademark "exquisite lucite heels." Shauna is going to put that in her marketing if you don't.
LMAO
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RIMADYL KILLS
Hey, I just noticed Shauna's bikini - I bought the same, exact one at Walmart last year!
Gotta give Shauna this...
It takes some SKILLS to prance in THOSE HEELS!!!
That is not a woman. That is a vaginal vault wrapped in some skin, sprouting hair and teeth. Histologically, it could be a Dermoid cyst.
Her future is a sealed jar of formaldehyde.
Shauna: the belly ring is so last century.
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"TEDDY'S BACK!"
Even her boobs want to be near those amazing heels. See how they're trying to get all the way down there?
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"I want a butt ugly slut with a bad drankin' problem and jealous old man in jail "- Roger Alan Wade
Shauna needs butt implants -- MK, refer her to the Kim K's plastic surgeon(s), stat!. When I look at her sweet victim-of-a-daughter, I see her skin turning into crackly leather because her Ho of a mother didn't put bullet-proof sunscreen on her. Poor baby.
Her ass is melting because she doesn't exercise, just lipos everything out 2-3 times a year.
Submitted by Alltheprettyones on August 25, 2008 - 12:57pm.
How she keeps from breaking her stick ankles in those shoes is a miracle in itself.
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Totally!
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I think I need a prison in order to dream of being free.
MK!!! please stop with the Shauna Posts!!!!I'm begging you!!!!!
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"Home remedy #108: IF YOU HAVE A BAD COUGH, TAKE A LARGE DOSE OF LAXATIVES. THEN YOU'LL
BE AFRAID TO COUGH.
and heels are supposed to lift the buttocks....
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I don't expect rocket scientists to work at McDonald's for minimum wage....but I do expect people to know the difference between bacon and sausage, damn.