Dolphin Sluts
I think we're the only skanks who haven't been romantically linked to the new God of the Sea, Michael Phelps. Oh yeah, haven't you heard? Phelps dethroned Poseidon.
Phelps has already been linked to model Lily Donaldson and Amanda "ewwww" Beard. They both denied ever dating him. Now Page Six claims Phelps was spotted sticking his little dolphin tongue down the throat of Australian swimmer Stephanie Rice. Some nosy bitch said they were making out on Monday night outside of the Olympic Village in Beijing.
Stephanie barely broke up with her swimmer boyfriend Eamon Sullivan. Eamon is reportedly "cut up" over the split. Well, I'll happily help Eamon put the pieces back together...into my no-no hole.
Phelps wouldn't comment on the rumors and has already said that his private life is private. That's fine, but can he please make his private PARTS public. That's all I really care about.
I have a feeling every girl in the world will be "spotted" sucking butterface with Phelps. Shit. I'd glue my eyes shut to make out with him.
Do you think that when he cums he makes dolphin cackles? And he totally cums pure chlorine.
Here's some extra douchey pictures of Stephanie from her Facebook page.
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Dolphin cackles. LMAO! With all he has accomplished he can pretty much have whatever lady, man or dolphin he likes.
Hello, blandsville.
Ooooh, lookie, another thin tanorexic brunette.
Then again, what to expect? After all, Michael Phelps is a jock and god forbid jocks date girls who don't look j u s t like every other broad they've dated.
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It puts the lotion on the skin or else it gets the hose again.
I might sound like a freak with you haters but I think that both of them are hot, I would not say no if he came my way. And Steph is way gorgeous.
i wonder if mr phelps knows about d-listed?
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lizzieb on August 16, 2008 - 9:05am.
The sad thing is that Madge would look good for 50 if she stopped trying to look 35. And ate a few pies, drank a few pints and had a laugh. I don't know why we get so upset about aging when the al
Eamon dumped her because he wanted to concentrate on the Olympics. She did not dump him. None of the sh*t you read about on these sites is true. Phelps has a longtime girlfriend here in Baltimore.
so tired of hearing about this fucking guy already.
She does look like a Femmedouche.
I think Phelps is fug. Yuck.
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RIMADYL KILLS
Actually, I am not attracted to Phelps freakishly long torso and short legs. Ew.
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"that is not a common looking vagina right?"
Submitted by missy on August 22, 2008 - 7:49am.
Submitted by oklahoma on August 22, 2008 - 8:46am.
OMG, she looks like that model/heiress uh, fuck.. They had their own show on E.. help me out guys.. what is her name, w/ her mom.. And she's Lauren's friend? anyone??
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britney gastineau.. WHY do I know that?!! ugh!
mornin' doll!!♥
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It's Brittny, bitch! Her mommy left out a vowel.
Phelps is tall and well built. That's enough to get him laid any time, any place, anywhere, any way. God I'm sick of all the short, fat fuckers I have to pick from...
Poor Phelps. The guy wins a hundred medals and I focus on the fact that he looks like horse faced dolphin
I always knew that all those goody two shoes Olympic athletes were all really horny sluts.
*****"Don't have sex, because you will get pregnant and die. Don't have sex in the missionary position, don't have sex standing up, just don't do it, OK, promise? OK, now everybody take some rubbers."*****
In her defense, she's at least more physically attractive than Amanda Beard. Phelps should be a body model; he has the physique of one of those mannequins at a department store that display underwear, but there's no bulge and you can't help but snicker, ironically forgetting that you work at hot dog on a stick. :-P
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I can't help it if your sister is just prettier.
www.myspace.com/dreamhypnotique
Michael Phelps is my favorite player. By the way, I saw his profile on millionaire&celeb dating site """""C e l e b C u p i d.c o m"""""" last week. It is said he is only intersted in dating wealthy young women on that site.
Here's an article about how much sex there is at the Olympic Village. Suffices to say that there is A LOT of fucking going on, with swimmers being among the randiest.
http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/sport/olympics/article4582421.ece
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"I think we'll need some more FBI guys."
Phelps already admitted he was a "special" kid.
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"that is not a common looking vagina right?"
Why the f-ck would you dump that hot ass bitch Eamon Sullivan for horsey Phelps??????
-- I can think of a hundred million reasons why! Plus free Frosted Flakes for life!
Why the f-ck would you dump that hot ass bitch Eamon Sullivan for horsey Phelps??????
I guess that explains Eamon's pissed off look throught out the games.
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"Oh lord, please help our athletes bring home the gold, enough gold so we can melt it down and buy back our economy from the Chinese". - Stephen Colbert
Submitted by sexymixer81 on August 22, 2008 - 10:17am.
I always thought he looked "slow" too, but everyone always looks at me like I've spoken blasphemy about the god known as Micheal Phelps.
Submitted by missy on August 22, 2008 - 9:20am
Sluts! Aren't they supposed to be keeping their eye on the prize not f-cking everything that walks?
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"Oh lord, please help our athletes bring home the gold, enough gold so we can melt it down and buy back our economy from the Chinese". - Stephen Colbert
If they get points for being beautiful, then we all do. He's emaciated and haggard, and the two of them actually have the exact same physique.
Athletes are just like models: genetic freaks who are lauded for doing something that essentially comes naturally to them and that's really not at all important.
Who the hell would fuck with Michael Phelps?! He looks like he has a touch of "the downs"...and that mouth...ugh! I don't care how many gold medals he has! He's an Olympic swimmer, no one will care about him in 6 months. People only care about them every 4 yrs.
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"All Those Who Wander Are Not Lost."
I am so GD sick of myspace whores. What in the fuckity fuck is wrong with these women? It's sluts and whores posing for loser retard pictures, that's all myspace is.
All the same pictures, just a different whore posing in them with her hideous tongue out looking over her shoulder like Paris fucking hilton. Wait, they're on facebook? SAME THING!
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"that is not a common looking vagina right?"
Maybe he'll have a Poseidon Adventure. Boo-yah!
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Yur sketti...I will haz it.
by NOT IMPRESSED - I was thinking the same thing. Very white trash, HoHan-esque.
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"Boo? Fuck You!"
-Chase Utley
Submitted by muncle on August 22, 2008 - 10:02am.
Michael Phelps - The Biggest Joke of an Athlete of all Time
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I think it's funny that some people are still insisting that Phelps didn't really win the 100m butterfly. Just after the race, the Serbian team filed an official protest regarding the finish. FINA slowed the video to the 10,000th of a second to make sure Phelps actually touched first. The Serbian team was able to view this footage, and FINA executive director Cornel Marculescu said that the Serbian team “was very satisfied and they agree with the referee.”
So if the Serbian team agrees that Phelps touched first, I think everyone else needs to STFU and just accept the truth.
Info. is from this site: http://www.swimnetwork.com
Submitted by twosie on August 22, 2008 - 10:42am.
Phelps is beyond ugly.
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With $100 million coming his way, Phelps could look like the Elephant Man and still be swimming in a sea of pussy.
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"I think we'll need some more FBI guys."
Steph, you cheap tramp!
If I can't have money...er...umm..I mean him...noone can!!!!!
Phelps is beyond ugly.
His freaky giant hand looks like it has 6 or 7 fingers in that picture. I had to count them to make sure I wasn't hallucinating.
Submitted by Dr. Dick on August 22, 2008 - 8:51am.
How long before he knocks someone up or contracts an STD? Be careful Michael, wear your raincoat.
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did you guys know that the olympic committee provides condoms to the olypic village? this year they provided 100,000 condoms for 10,000 athletes residing in the village. Some years the number was up to 350,000!!
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Fuck 'Em If They Can't Take A Joke
a message from the Church of the SubGenius
her ex Eamon Sullivan is HOT.
Jocks rule, yo!
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Help me!
MK says: "And he totally cums pure chlorine"
Mr. Mercury says that's what Phelps used to do, now he's gonna cum money from all his impending endorsement deals. These horny Olympic beeotches know a walking checkbook when they see one!
"Rhoda, we're all aware that you're an adroit liar"
Enough with the Phelps chatter!
With the ludicrous hyperbole that it foisted upon this man, one would be forgiven for thinking that he truly was the Greek Titan Okeanos.
This bizarre worship of celebrity seems to be a reflection of America's primal polytheistic belief, which has long been strangled by evangelic Christian doctrine. It's almost like a fucking religion.
Phelps is no better than the Golden Calf.
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Are we sure Xtina has not passed on and her final request was to be embalmed standing up holding a bottle of her nasty perfume? - DivasGone
Michael Phelps is my favorite player. By the way, I saw his profile on millionaire&celeb dating site """""C e l e b C u p i d.c o m"""""" last week. It is said he is only intersted in dating wealthy young women on that site.
Swimmers have the best bods of anyone. That is all. (C) IG 2008.
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Announcing new perfume: Mall Smell(R) by Sheeps
I'd hit it. That Aussie swimmer sounds like a vapid slag.
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"Do you remember a time when women couldn't vote, and certain folk weren't allowed on golf courses? Petridge Farm remembers."
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Michael Phelps - The Biggest Joke of an Athlete of all Time
christine the hoff on August 22, 2008 - 10:00am
hahahahahahaha, those would be sad toilet bat times.
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Madolyn: What do you expect coming in here?
Billy Costigan: I have to come here.
Madolyn: I know you have to come here, but now that you're here, what do you want?
Billy Costigan: You want the truth? Valium.
Keep the Phelps drama coming!
Haha! It's a nice break from the typical Hollywood BS.
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Whenever you feel fat, just look at one of your pinkies. I love my pinkies. - MK, duh.
Submitted by angel_i on August 22, 2008 - 8:59am.
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I was just telling my husband last night that referees should do the circle with one hand with the other hand's finger going through it as the signal for illegal contact in football.
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"There's a little bit of asshole in every nice guy, and there's a little bit of genius in every moron." - RDJ
Wonder how long it'll be before he's spotted with Kate Hudson by some "nosy bitch". Gotta love those nosy bitches.
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"I think we'll need some more FBI guys."
Bradiful
phelps and simpson? match made in the bowels of HELL!!!!
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"what're you still doing here? Didn't I tell you to go home and fuck your mother?"
Submitted by NOT IMPRESSED on August 22, 2008 - 9:54am.
Way to be a myspace cliche! I hate when chicks think they're being hot and edgy by posing with their tongue between their fingers or whatev...
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And she doesn't even do it right!
Now I'm pretty sexed up but I can't think of one hand, hand/face, or body sign relating to sex that doesn't make me cringe. To think you'd put that on a page to help you make friends...well, I guess that depends on what kinda friends you're looking for.
♥ ThreadKilla! / Lean Like a Chola / She's a Lady.
I can only find pictures of the girl twin.
Welcome To Fame Mr. Butta Phelps.
Watch Out For Jessica Simpson, her Daddy will steal your soul and your medals.
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Madolyn: What do you expect coming in here?
Billy Costigan: I have to come here.
Madolyn: I know you have to come here, but now that you're here, what do you want?
Billy Costigan: You want the truth? Valium.
well, whatever (I've heard quite enough about The Olympics and Mr. Phelps), but I kinda thought he was gay
by NOT IMPRESSED LOL me too and the "Sexy Cop" hooo haaaa LMAO @ you Stephanie!****************************1/20/09
"TEDDY'S BACK!"
Way to be a myspace cliche! I hate when chicks think they're being hot and edgy by posing with their tongue between their fingers or whatev...
NAST.
soooo...when's stephanie rice's obligatory playboy/penthouse spread coming out? you know it's a matter of time...
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the world is great big old place for all of us to fuck up in it...
He looks like a dribbler. I mean, when he's just talking to you.
And then food falls out of his mouth when he's eating his (corporate sponsored) cereal.
Ew.
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Help me!