Morning Wood

The Osmonds of this generation. I'm glad they were immortalized in wax. When sales start to slump they'll introduce Marie.

i must be old b/c i can barely tolerate looking at the jonas brothers, let alone listen to their music...

and what the hell kinda spermaid is taylor hanson on? he should market that shit to the hollywooders so they don't have to do invitro...
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the world is great big old place for all of us to fuck up in it...

Submitted by dreamhypnotique on August 19, 2008 - 10:15am.

Am I wrong for dismissing the Jonas Brothers as a less talented, somehow more nasally annoying brunette incarnation of Hanson?
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Nope, you're not wrong at all!

I associate the Jonas Brothers with Perez because he has this strange obsession with them, and then i get very creeped out.

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"F*ck you Tyra Banks, Oprah, Magic Johnson, Tiger Woods, Rockefeller. F*ck you." - La Pequena Hillary Clinton, 6/17/08

Hobbits. That's all I can think of whenever I see the Jonas Brothers, especially the two on the far left.

Not much else to do there in Tulsa, eh Hanson bros?

LCT/Sensi!
Did either of you notice the OP ad on the first two pages???? They shopped about 6" off of Rumer's chinnie chin chin!

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Blah...blah...blah...jack me off and pour me some lemonade. -Michael K

Oklahoma
Hi woman. I missed you yesterday:(

Submitted by LOVE CARROTTOP on August 19, 2008 - 10:00am.
Submitted by Your Mom Ate th... on August 19, 2008 - 10:50am.

Jeez, now I feel bad. You must've wanted to gouge your poor eyes out. Here, you can nestle with my blankie if you want. *hands LCT blankie*
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Awwww, fanks. *snuggles into blankie* You use this as a giant Kleenex don't you? There are little crusty boogs all over the thing.

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Yeah, last time I got the sniffles we didn't have tissues in the apartment. Sorry bout that.

☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺
"If Mr. McMurphy doesn't want to take his medication orally, I'm sure we can arrange that he can have it some other way. But I don't think that he would like it."

I like her VICODIN HAUTE COUTURE!!!!!

~~To achieve true happiness, find a cause bigger than yourself.....~~

~~Nothing screams "Haute Couture" like prison tattoos~~

10 bucks says the girly Jonas Bro (who likes the flat iron just a wee bit too much) got in some "alone time" with the figures before they dressed them.

Am I wrong for dismissing the Jonas Brothers as a less talented, somehow more nasally annoying brunette incarnation of Hanson?

/*\/*\/*\/*\/*\/*\/*\/*\/*\/*\
Boats n' Hoes, gotta have me my boats n' hoes.
www.myspace.com/dreamhypnotique

NotImpressed: hahahah....I take care of a 13 year old, so I know the music- it's not as bad as Heidi, but it's pretty bad......

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I'll idealize, and realize that it's no sacrifice because the price is paid;
And there's nothing left to grieve..... Fuckin' go-
-Fiona Apple "Get Gone"

Every time I see these turds I just wanna smack the douche outta them.

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Did I leave the gas on? No! No, I'm a fuckin' squirrel!

Submitted by parissucksliterally on August 19, 2008 - 10:58am.

I totally agree. I feel weird for thinking Joe (the middle one) is hot. The fact that I know his name is also wrong on soooo many levels. Their music FUCKING SUCKS, though.

Submitted by Your Mom Ate th... on August 19, 2008 - 10:50am.

Jeez, now I feel bad. You must've wanted to gouge your poor eyes out. Here, you can nestle with my blankie if you want. *hands LCT blankie*
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Awwww, fanks. *snuggles into blankie* You use this as a giant Kleenex don't you? There are little crusty boogs all over the thing.

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Yes, ees gud. Now, if you pees shut mouf, we say nice prayer to God.

I think the middle Jonas Brother is very good looking, the oldest is so fucking fug! The baby is ok, but man, how the tweeners LOVE him! I don't get it......

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I'll idealize, and realize that it's no sacrifice because the price is paid;
And there's nothing left to grieve..... Fuckin' go-
-Fiona Apple "Get Gone"

OMG are we talking about Mario's peen? ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww LMAOOOOOOOOO Is it lunchtime yet???
****************************1/20/09
"Blame it on the London air!"

Paula Abdul is seriously deluded in that she believes she has taste. She's proud of the fact she decorated her house without an interior designer (it shows) and she dresses without a stylist (ditto).

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"You don't remember the motorcycle gang? Doing the striptease in front of them at the bar? The iguana? Good God, man. Tell me you remember the iguana!"

Why do the Jonas brothers need two sets of statues? Also, the only thing I EVER noticed about them was how ridiculously overstyled they are! That is dead-on. But if anyone knows or has young kids and has seen the Nickelodeon or Disney shows, you'd notice that all of the children look like GapKids took a shit all over them. They are all wearing ten layers of clothing and piles of accessories.

♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥
http://www.myspace.com/rainbowsrule

The Hollywood machine loves a happy homewrecker. In fact, they worship them. They even give them $14 million for pictures of their chosen ones. - Our beloved MK

PAGING OKIE!!! OKIE PLEASE COME TO THE SERVICE DESK!!!!

check your email ho♥
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Fuck 'Em If They Can't Take A Joke

a message from the Church of the SubGenius

The Hanson's be working it out.

Darth Vader wore a raspberry beret

Submitted by maDalice on August 19, 2008 - 9:47am.
The Jonas Bros are so comically overstyled all the time. What is with the blazers with pushed up sleeves? It drives me crazy.

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How else are they going to distract attention from their overly-dweebish faces?

☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺
"If Mr. McMurphy doesn't want to take his medication orally, I'm sure we can arrange that he can have it some other way. But I don't think that he would like it."

Submitted by LOVE CARROTTOP on August 19, 2008 - 9:45am.
Sorry dear. If it brings you any comfort, I couldn't fall asleep for hours after seeing that picture of him because I was so disgusting, and now I'm over tired and cranky.

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Jeez, now I feel bad. You must've wanted to gouge your poor eyes out. Here, you can nestle with my blankie if you want. *hands LCT blankie*

☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺
"If Mr. McMurphy doesn't want to take his medication orally, I'm sure we can arrange that he can have it some other way. But I don't think that he would like it."

The Jonas Bros are so comically overstyled all the time. What is with the blazers with pushed up sleeves? It drives me crazy.

Submitted by Your Mom Ate th... on August 19, 2008 - 10:43am.

LCT & Sensimina: Well, I hope you're both happy. The images you've conjured up in my brain have caused me severe trauma and I don't think I'll be able to go on in life without intensive therapy. Thanks a bunch!
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Sorry dear. If it brings you any comfort, I couldn't fall asleep for hours after seeing that picture of him because I was so disgusting, and now I'm over tired and cranky.

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Yes, ees gud. Now, if you pees shut mouf, we say nice prayer to God.

Submitted by Your Mom Ate th... on August 19, 2008 - 10:40am.

Gah! I saw him, too! What the french, toast?? If anyone should be getting the fame, it should be MK. He's much better looking and is actually funny!
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Way better looking is an understatement.
MK = Gerard Butler
Perez = The footlong light brown poo someone left floating in the toilet overnight at work.

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Yes, ees gud. Now, if you pees shut mouf, we say nice prayer to God.

LCT & Sensimina: Well, I hope you're both happy. The images you've conjured up in my brain have caused me severe trauma and I don't think I'll be able to go on in life without intensive therapy. Thanks a bunch!

☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺
"If Mr. McMurphy doesn't want to take his medication orally, I'm sure we can arrange that he can have it some other way. But I don't think that he would like it."

OMG, he looks so handsome. Just saw his profile on millionaire dating site """"""""""C e l e b C u p i d.c o m"""""""""" " last week. I am wondering what kind of relationship he is looking for on that site. Is he single now? Just curious!
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Um...heidi and spencer are so beyond nasty. i've never even seen them on the tele but just seeing their faces makes me want to punch a nun.

also, paula looks retarded.

one last thing: what is the big deal with the jonas brothers? seriously, did i miss something?

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Just don't feed the gayelles! They eat enough of each other.---MK 8/5/2008

Submitted by oklahoma on August 19, 2008 - 9:32am.
LCT, i seen him on th Hills thing the other day, He looked Identical to Spencer Pratt to me (Perez), Very yucky!!

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Gah! I saw him, too! What the french, toast?? If anyone should be getting the fame, it should be MK. He's much better looking and is actually funny!

☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺
"If Mr. McMurphy doesn't want to take his medication orally, I'm sure we can arrange that he can have it some other way. But I don't think that he would like it."

Submitted by Sensimina on August 19, 2008 - 10:34am.

LCT! Can you imagine sucking that obese manimal;s micropeen? UGH! That's why Pigez has to use photoshopped pics on Manhunt to even speak to guys. That or he just bribes young guys to send him videos of themselves jacking off in exchange for "Exposure" on his blog that they will never get. (Both true stories).

But yeah, I saw the pic in Us where he's in those ridiculous PJs walking around because that's all that fits him. He looks fatter than ever IMO, but was hyping that he'd show himself in a swimsuit on his site...like that would really entice traffic.
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oh my God you did NOT just talk about his penis. I'm so going to hurl now. It sure didn't help that he said the reason he lost weight was because of sex, and not wanting to get naked with anyone. No, douchebag, it's because no one wanted to get naked with YOU.

Yeah no kidding... him sporting a bathing suit on his site is like Star Jones offering to strip off her bra so we can all get a nice juicy shot of her flappy pancake tits and silver dollar nips. Thanks for trying to keep us all satisfied, Perez. Pigez.

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Yes, ees gud. Now, if you pees shut mouf, we say nice prayer to God.

It is just mind-boggling to me, that someone would PUT Heidi and Spencer's wedding on TV...
WHY?
As far as I know, NO ONE can stand those two!

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I'll idealize, and realize that it's no sacrifice because the price is paid;
And there's nothing left to grieve..... Fuckin' go-
-Fiona Apple "Get Gone"

Submitted by oklahoma on August 19, 2008 - 10:32am.

LCT, i seen him on th Hills thing the other day, He looked Identical to Spencer Pratt to me (Perez), Very yucky!!
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Isn't that just precious. Two slimy disgusting sacks of shit on the same show.

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Yes, ees gud. Now, if you pees shut mouf, we say nice prayer to God.

No more douche and douchette!!! They are driving me f-ing crazy with their sucktacular displays of sucktizm!
Don't care about Hillary duff unless Eminem puts her in a song again....
BTW does anyone know what he's been doing laltely...I mean Em? I miss the crap out of his nasty little self.

"Laugh alone and the world thinks you're an idiot".

LCT! Can you imagine sucking that obese manimal;s micropeen? UGH! That's why Pigez has to use photoshopped pics on Manhunt to even speak to guys. That or he just bribes young guys to send him videos of themselves jacking off in exchange for "Exposure" on his blog that they will never get. (Both true stories).

But yeah, I saw the pic in Us where he's in those ridiculous PJs walking around because that's all that fits him. He looks fatter than ever IMO, but was hyping that he'd show himself in a swimsuit on his site...like that would really entice traffic.

♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥
http://www.myspace.com/rainbowsrule

The Hollywood machine loves a happy homewrecker. In fact, they worship them. They even give them $14 million for pictures of their chosen ones. - Our beloved MK

LCT, i seen him on th Hills thing the other day, He looked Identical to Spencer Pratt to me (Perez), Very yucky!!

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My salsa, salsa, salsa, salsa, my salsa
Makes all the pretty girls want to dance
And take off their underpants
My salsa makes all the pretty girls wanna dance
And take off their underpants, My Salsa

Off topic story of the day:

I was in bed reading Us Magazine last night (the cover had a story called "Real Hollywood Mothers (No Angelina!)" - I was sold) and there was a before and after picture of Perez Hilton when he was fat, and now, when he's still fat, but just a little less fat. I can honestly say, and I don't even feel bad saying it, that I have never been more repulsed by a make in my life. I look at him and I seriously become nauseous and have to put down the magazine and think about kittens and pies.
http://www.mtv.com/content/ontv/new_years_eve/2008/photo/flipbooks/purpl...

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Yes, ees gud. Now, if you pees shut mouf, we say nice prayer to God.

Submitted by parissucksliterally on August 19, 2008 - 8:22am.
The whole wax statue thing is so stupid to me...
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I know! They are so fucking creepy!
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"I want a butt ugly slut with a bad drankin' problem and jealous old man in jail "- Roger Alan Wade

The Jonas Brothers. No idea who they are, and i'm okay with that.

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Blah...blah...blah...jack me off and pour me some lemonade. -Michael K

Submitted by its six thirty ... on August 19, 2008 - 9:24am.

now I love you♥
_____________________________________________

Fuck 'Em If They Can't Take A Joke

a message from the Church of the SubGenius

Submitted by missy on August 19, 2008 - 6:11am.
Submitted by its six thirty ... on August 19, 2008 - 9:10am.

dont fuck with me

******
*hands over bottle* here ya go

get your own life perfect......then come talk to me!!!!!! ~~Michelle Aline~~

Submitted by Triscuit on August 19, 2008 - 9:14am.

hey doll!! my buddy is on suboxone too.. I like it cuz Im not on it.

surrsley, six thirty? dont dangle opiates in my face without getting my mailing address... its just cruel!! ;)

_____________________________________________

Fuck 'Em If They Can't Take A Joke

a message from the Church of the SubGenius

The Jonas on the left wishes his face was as thin as his wax figure's.

The whole wax statue thing is so stupid to me...and how do the Jonas Bros have them already?

I automatically thought Heidi and Spencer, when I saw Twit and Twat.....ugh, sickening.

Taylor Hanson is yummy.......sigh.

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I'll idealize, and realize that it's no sacrifice because the price is paid;
And there's nothing left to grieve..... Fuckin' go-
-Fiona Apple "Get Gone"

Jonas Sisters: Tween slobber and a lot of dry humping. They're not even somewhat adorable, wtf?
Donnie Wahlberg: Too bad about him and his wifey. It does seem true that marriage ruins relationships.
Hilary Duff: If she is engaged, then that's a stupid move. I don't understand this, enjoy your goddamn 20s.
Twit and Twat wedding: A horse marrying a gremlin. I hope they don't fucking televise their wedding night.
Paula Abdul reminds me of one of those trophy wives who is always drunk and married to a guy that is 102. And I would also like a Vicodin.
Taylor Hanson: Say it with me, BIRTH CONTROL! And his wifey looks damn good for having so many brats.
Miseralba can go fuck herself.

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"I want a butt ugly slut with a bad drankin' problem and jealous old man in jail "- Roger Alan Wade

I've never heard a Jonas Brothers or Miley Cyrus song in fact ever since the ipod I haven't listened to the radio.
And the only reason Alba is smiling is because she finaly got that thing that made her fat out of her and is skinny again.

The Jonas Brothers got wax statues? Jesus, how little do you have to do to get a wax statue these days. You used to have had a career than could be measured in years not months... have made a substantial impact in your field... any dweeb can get one now.

I can't tell the difference between the real Jonas geeks and the wax ones...which are which?

☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺
"If Mr. McMurphy doesn't want to take his medication orally, I'm sure we can arrange that he can have it some other way. But I don't think that he would like it."

I'm surprised Paula didn't trip over her dog again with that hideous train. She has always been sartorially challenged.
I got vics, too. But I need 'em for my back. Oh for the days when I took drugs for fun, not because I need them!

"This ain't rock n roll. This is genocide!"

He is my favorite. Just saw his personals ID on millionaires personals site """C e l e b C u p i d.c o m"""""" yesterday. I am wondering what kind of relationship he is looking for on ~that site.