Tuesday, August 19th 2008
Why Did They Cover Up His Hot Body?!
The king of all humans, Michael Phelps, shot this Sports Illustrated cover on Sunday night in China. The issue will already be on newsstands tomorrow. Those bitches are quick!
This is what I don't understand. Why would they cover up his hot body?! That shit is his real gold medal! I mean, they really should have just wrapped the gold medals around the top of his head instead. Hide the flaws and show us what we really want to see! On second thought, they should have just hung the gold medals from his golden peen. And I'm not joking. His peen is probably made of gold.
Here's the inspiration for Phelps' SI cover. Mark Spitz took this iconic image back in 1972. Spitz's version wins. Sorry. It's all about the pornstache.
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oh -- LAWD just make these toxic chinese olympics OVER!
he is hardcore UGLY, and NOT in sexy way, what a waste of a hot body
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i like that Spitz's armpits are hairy
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I saw a Spitz interview and I doubt he is having a diva meltdown. Anyone who has ever held a record for anything, knows it will be eventually be broken. It sounds like he is most stung with his not being included by the Olympic committee than Phelps himself.
I would let Spitz spank me.
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“The only time to eat diet food is while you're waiting for the steak to cook”
F both these bitches. I want a picture of JLo with more gold medals than a RunDMC concert.
Submitted by Sensimina on August 19, 2008 - 7:38am.
My vagina is really confused about what to do with a body like that attached to a head like Andre the Giant's.
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OMG! ROFL!! The picture of Phelp's is just goofy. It just makes you want to laugh because he is so, so goofy looking. Mark, on the other hand, is one hot bitch.
Butterlicious!
I hate the ribbons on the medals. They cover up the part I actually want to see.
Love that old pic. More like "Mark Swallows".
Okay I'm just throwing this out there...you know the giants in like the Guiness book or Ripley's?????? Now look at his face again. He's friggin awesome but DAYUM!!!!
"Laugh alone and the world thinks you're an idiot".
Dirk Diggler ~ I agree. Have you heard Phelps talk? The guy sounds like a complete dufus.
He's a great swimmer, I'll give him that.
But that's about it. The guy is really, really stupid. Exhibit #1: he wants to date Blohan.
I can see him doing the party circuit with the rest of the celebutards.
Michael Phelps sure can swim, but he's ugly and does not sound very bright. Nice body though.
Michael Phelps = Buttaface!
I never realized until I saw that pic how hot Mark Spitz was back then.
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'Cause we all just wanna be big rock stars
And live in hilltop houses driving fifteen cars...
-Nickelback, "Rockstar"
Horrible picture of Phelps.
Um, Mark Spitz looks like a rapist, LOL. My mom told me that she thought he was really hot when she was in high school.
Mark Spitz is the king.
I like Micheal Phleps, but he's really starting to get "Hollywood-ized" already.
Maybe he can get his ears pinned back with the bazillion dollar endorsement deals he's getting.
I think I like the gold chain from Spitz's medals better than the cloth ribbon from Phelps'. Spitz's hair is cooler, too. Both of them are amazing swimmers, but Spitz has the advantage of looking like a pimp/Vietnam vet/pornstar/first grader's dad/any man from the 70s.
He'll never outdo Steve Prefontaine, though. That dude definitely loves the Kaiser.
http://www.slb-coaching.com/UploadedImages/Steve%20Prefontaine.jpg
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Boats n' Hoes, gotta have me my boats n' hoes.
www.myspace.com/dreamhypnotique
Submitted by ladyd on August 19, 2008 - 9:44am.
Submitted by But.Seriously.Folks on August 19, 2008 - 9:32am.
Even Spitz's medals scream "It came from the 70's"! What, are they on gold ropes?? So he could conveniently rock them at the disco??
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My thoughts EXACTLY! God, the 70's were such a joke stylwise-even the prestige of the Olympics couldn't escape the cheesy gold medallion on a chain look.
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I actually think the chains look more masculine than the ribbons. I prefer chains.
yuck. His face has never been his best feature, but this shot is fuggin hid-ee-us.
http://thevinylvillage.wordpress.com
Mark Spitz had it going on.
Darth Vader wore a raspberry beret
Submitted by But.Seriously.Folks on August 19, 2008 - 9:32am.
Even Spitz's medals scream "It came from the 70's"! What, are they on gold ropes?? So he could conveniently rock them at the disco??
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My thoughts EXACTLY! God, the 70's were such a joke stylwise-even the prestige of the Olympics couldn't escape the cheesy gold medallion on a chain look.
"My vagina is really confused"
Oh my GOD Sensi!! That made snort!!!
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Blah...blah...blah...jack me off and pour me some lemonade. -Michael K
Terrible pic of him!
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I'll idealize, and realize that it's no sacrifice because the price is paid;
And there's nothing left to grieve..... Fuckin' go-
-Fiona Apple "Get Gone"
My vagina is really confused about what to do with a body like that attached to a head like Andre the Giant's.
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http://www.myspace.com/rainbowsrule
The Hollywood machine loves a happy homewrecker. In fact, they worship them. They even give them $14 million for pictures of their chosen ones. - Our beloved MK
Dude has buttaface...but he IS awesome...part dolphin or something...I'm a swimmer..and he AMAZES me...
Can't decide whether Phelps looks like Keenan Ivory Wayans' "over-gold" brother in "I'm Gonna Git You Sucka" and he can't sit on the toilet properly. Or, if he's wearing a gold-laden halter top, ready to get bent over and fucked inside West Hollywood's TomKat theater.
Either way, not good looks. Or visuals.
http://www.collectr.com/ol/spitzm.html
Here is the pic of Mark
Michael Phelps is my favorite player. By the way, I saw his profile on millionaire&celeb dating site """""C e l e b C u p i d.c o m"""""" last week. It is said he is only intersted in dating wealthy young women on that site.
Good athlete. Potato bag face
蜘龍====================龍蜘
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(='.'=)
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I remember having a Spitz poster hanging in my bedroom. He was wearing red, white, and blue flag speedo type swimsuit with his gold medals. The HOTNESS. Mark was on tv this morning and still looks great. Great personality too.
I will take Spitz over the fug mug any day. So were did Phelps tuck his goods during the event? They were missing in action.
Who is Michael Phelps?
The "wow" factor really went down with this guy when when he said he'd love to meet Blohan because he thinks she's really HAWT. *barf*
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Dlisted's a hellava drug.
"Paris is fucking lame. She's more offensive to me than anything. She's a total, raging, disgusting, rich, lazy party slut. I pray that my daughter will not turn out like her." - Dave Grohl
Can't imagine why anyone would be hating on Mark Phelps...I think what he accomplished is awesome. And I get why they duplicated the cover...why wouldn't they? It was iconic.
I can't comment on his "hotness" level...I am old enough to be his mom...so there is a huge "ick" factor about seeing his package yesterday.
Finally, the kid loves his mom. What's not to love about that?
That's not a good pic of Phelps. They should have come up with an original idea instead of trying to copy the shot from '72.
the arrangement of the medals look like a halter top.
That grill is rough!
Phelps is rough in the mug. OMG, it would have to be pitch black, a canvas bag over the head and duct tape over his mouth so I'm not reminded of the monstrosity from which the voice comes.
Damn...what a waste of a tight body to be attached to that face.
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Virtue and Talent are obviously overrated.
Mark had serious "PORN 'STACHE".Clearly a man of his time.
How can you not love the guy?
Three cheers for Michael Phelps!
And congrats to all the athletes!
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Surfing the apocalypse.
Submitted by Voice of Reason on August 19, 2008 - 1:44pm.
Why does he look like he's wearing a Versace halter top?
Mark Spitz was so hot. I saw him in person once about a year after he won his medals, and yummm. I wonder what he looks like today?
He's been on the news alot lately commenting on Phelps - not half bad for a "man of a certain age".
Mark Spitz was the hawtness. The mustache: Glorious.
I'm not liking the Phelps cover. He's actually better looking than the cover portrays.
Submitted by FatMartha on August 19, 2008 - 8:42am.
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I know they shave, but still. His little latex cranium condom keeps his ears pretty flat. One tug and those bitches roll down to the floor, Dumbo style.
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"There's a little bit of asshole in every nice guy, and there's a little bit of genius in every moron." - RDJ
Submitted by bernstar69 on August 19, 2008 - 10:12am.
Submitted by Triscuit on August 19, 2008 - 9:38am.
Thanks, boo! Much appreciated!! :-)
No, I took the shot. But the subject matter is quite the hotness, isn't he? ;-) That's my heart right there. *sigh*
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Bernie, who is that hot slut?! :o (I tried to vote for you but my work computer won't let me ;-;)
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Hi5.
OMG now we have to look at this big gross ole cheeto booty with the tramp stamp all day? "Dont let this happen to you"
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"Blame it on the London air!"
I thought the Beijing medals had jade in them ...
Noooo, 'staches are for losers! Don't even suggest a cookie duster for Phelps.
Why does he look like he's wearing a Versace halter top?
Mark Spitz was so hot. I saw him in person once about a year after he won his medals, and yummm. I wonder what he looks like today?
look at the size of the Spitz hands!
Good Lord!
I heard that Spitz was indeed the diva and shitty to his teammates in '72.
Way back then, my 10 year old attention went to Olga Korbut, the gymnast. I got into gymnastics after that. I was flexible, but too much of a chicken-shit for the flips and such.
http://cache.eb.com/eb/image?id=84636&rendTypeId=4
"This ain't rock n roll. This is genocide!"
Submitted by Triscuit on August 19, 2008 - 9:38am.
Thanks, boo! Much appreciated!! :-)
No, I took the shot. But the subject matter is quite the hotness, isn't he? ;-) That's my heart right there. *sigh*
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Submitted by ISprainedMyUvula on August 19, 2008 - 10:06am.
Dear Michael Phelps,
Where in the holy hellfuck are your PUBES???????
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Dontchu know, the swimmahs shave their pubies!! Causes drag (supposedly). I think it'd be more important for him to shave off his ears, though, since those things probably slow him down by about 10 miles per hour.
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Hi5.
As I said the other night, those ears make a good place to rest one's ankles, so WHY COMPLAIN?
I silently wished they'd do a send up of the Spitz cover, but those ribbons just ruin EVERYTHING. Phelps seems like a good natured kid though, but the cover does fail him.
Oh well, back to Ex Cons in Cornrow Wigs Volley, I mean Women's Indoor Volleyball.
^^^
the poster formerly known as jammer
8 medals and they give him THE WORST cover ever! Not only the worst, but the most unoriginal cover. I would be pissed if I had just busted my ass as Phelps did only to get this cover. Does nobody have creativity anymore??
Spitz looks like the fucking daddy in his. Look at those chains baby!! No stupid ribbons were ever getting into his shot!
The boy has just done something that will perhaps never be done again and the best they came up with was this pissy effort! Completely wasted opportunity.
--thanks awfully--
Submitted by bernstar69 on August 19, 2008 - 9:19am.
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I voted for you!
Is that you IN the picture?
Or did you TAKE the picture?
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