Jemaine Clement Is Off The Market
I have terrible news. Jemaine Clement from "Flight of the Concords" got married. And it wasn't to you. Or me. He married some raggedy skank who goes by the name of Miranda Manasiadis. I'm sure she's a lovely lady with a vagina like a spring tulip, but she'll always be a homewrecking cunt to me.
Jemaine has taken a break from writing the series to marry the tramp in a small registry office in Los Angeles. 34-year-old Jemaine has been called one of Wellington's most eligible bachelors. Not anymore!
Even though she's now on my shit list, I have a little advice for Miranda Manasiadis. Keep your new husband away from Sienna Miller! Her vagina alarm just went off, letting her know that there's a married man in her midst. If Sienna comes around, throw holy water on her!
Here's a clip featuring Jemaine's "rudest" moments. Before I die, I want Jemaine to say to me just once, "Shut up, Michael." Just once.
I am the creator of the video you have posted here.
I have considered deleting it off YouTube so that it is not associated with this article in anyway, however I know true fans of Jemaine would be disappointed. One bad apple does not have to spoil the bunch.
I do want to be clear that I do not support this terrible display of the media in away... you should be ashamed of yourself for saying such nasty things about such wonderful people who only want to make you laugh.
Karma is a bitch. Be careful.
Submitted by sugarfoot73 on August 19, 2008 - 10:40pm.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h2LpeA3jcEU
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"I'll go unlock the kids and make us all breakfast." - Theodore Bagwell
I guess I'll have to put my business socks away now...[sigh]
I can't take it. Why did she have to take Jemaine. Well at least we still have Brett and Arj right?
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"I was hoping to dress something like Prince, but toned down. As if he were going to the zoo or the supermarket." - Jemaine Clement
This makes me really sad :(
'Never mess with a chick with lip liner, no lipstick'
Submitted by saram23 on August 19, 2008 - 10:08am.
Jemaine as Bowie made my life.
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if he doesn't win an Emmy for that there is no justice.
Em-mee
Em-mee
Em-mee
-☮'---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮-
LoLo come back--
You can blame it all on me
I was wrong
And I just can't live without you!♫
Not MY Jermaine! He is SOO HOT! I love his lips. DAMN HIM! I love The Flight of the Conchords, every episode is a GEM!
I'm not familiar with this show. Is his character supposed to look like a hipster douchebag?
oh great montage! I love these guys, they make me feel homesick every time I watch them.... totally cracks me up that you americans get them!
Congrats to him! Yes it is sad that a Conchord is off the market, but I'm NOT giving up on Bret!! We are meant to be together, sure he doesnt know it yet, and neither does is fiance, but it WILL HAPPEN!!
Lately I've been so obsessed with the Conchords that I feel like Mel, just without the husband
I always thought Brett was hotter.
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"Oh lord, please help our athletes bring home the gold, enough gold so we can melt it down and buy back our economy from the Chinese". - Stephen Colbert
Love your Stuart Smalley avatar, Mrs. Kravitz!
And I seriously had no idea anyone besides myself loved Jermaine. He's fucking awesome & I want to do business times with him forever. SAD DAY. Congrats to him, anyway, though. :'(
Jemaine as Bowie made my life.
It's a sad day today.
Submitted by applejones on August 19, 2008 - 11:59am.
God, August has been shitty. My ex is skipping around town with girl 9 years his junior while were forced to stay in the same apartment due to the lease, the guy I was seeing dumped me and now this?! I'm going to seriously drink some drano.
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Well shit, girl--what are you waiting for? Buy some Ex Lax and put it in his drink before he goes to meet the young bitch--embarassing toilet times for him, happy times for you!
☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺
"If Mr. McMurphy doesn't want to take his medication orally, I'm sure we can arrange that he can have it some other way. But I don't think that he would like it."
God, August has been shitty. My ex is skipping around town with girl 9 years his junior while were forced to stay in the same apartment due to the lease, the guy I was seeing dumped me and now this?! I'm going to seriously drink some drano.
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Don't let anyone tell you you're not humpable,
Because you're bumpable. Well I hope this doesn't make you feel uncomfortable
I can't even scroll past this post without wanting to weep uncontrollably.
yes I'm familiar with the show thanks.
Bret and Jemaine, not Brit and Jermaine.
ain't no party
like my Nana's tea party
hey, ho
http://images1.fanpop.com/images/image_uploads/Bret-Jemaine-s-Filter-Cov...
love me some Brit and Jermaine...
NO! NO! NO! NO! NO! NO!!! I have the most unreasonable, passionate, hopeless crush on this man.
I think it's fucking rude that he's gone and done this to me. Rude!
Jemaine is SEXAY!!!!
LOVE him!
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I'll idealize, and realize that it's no sacrifice because the price is paid;
And there's nothing left to grieve..... Fuckin' go-
-Fiona Apple "Get Gone"
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Must. go. hang. myself.
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Don't let anyone tell you you're not humpable,
Because you're bumpable. Well I hope this doesn't make you feel uncomfortable
Submitted by 2Di4 on August 19, 2008 - 8:38am.
am i getting old or something? who the f is this fugly guy and why do all y'all dlist biatches want to do him?
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Rent HBO's Flight of the Conchords. Then you'll have the answer to yout questions.
Trust.
-☮'---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮-
Nervenzusammenbruch
There something about you boy
That makes me sweat.
-☮'---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮-
Nervenzusammenbruch
am i getting old or something? who the f is this fugly guy and why do all y'all dlist biatches want to do him?
i don't get today's youth with your jonas brothers and your mtv. i need to go drink my metamucil now...
It is a sad sad day for my "business socks" fantasies.
I checked out the photo (and one other one I found), and wow, I agree with Suki. Not a terribly attractive woman.
Mark David Chapman + Rainn Wilson = this big hamburger head-looking dude.
Crap. I knew it was only a matter of time when I saw the dedication on their CD (Miranda and Hannah, and their families) - BTW, Hannah is Bret's fiancee, so it's only a matter of time before they are both off the market.
Tragic. I listen to their CD every morning on the way to work. Hearing Jemaine sing about "Business Time" won't be nearly as much fun with his wife intruding on my Jemaine fantasies.
Why Jemaine, why?
NNNNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Wow...wifey ain't looking so hot...maybe its a bad angle?
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Just don't feed the gayelles! They eat enough of each other.---MK 8/5/2008
He and Bret are both sexy muthafuckas.....
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I'll idealize, and realize that it's no sacrifice because the price is paid;
And there's nothing left to grieve..... Fuckin' go-
-Fiona Apple "Get Gone"
http://www.scoop.co.nz/stories/HL0808/S00225.htm
Here's a pic of Jemaine and his wife.
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!
This IS terrible news.
Excuse me while i quietly weep.
Goddamnit, NOOOOO!!!!!!!
Submitted by E.A.P. on August 19, 2008 - 9:41am.
He has the sexiest mouth I've ever seen on a man.
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I know. I just want to jump on them and roll all over them (in a non-sexytimes way, of course....for the most part.)
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Hi5.
BEST.SHOW.EVER.
i love that his name is "Jemaine" but for the entire season i thought it was "Jermaine" because of their kiwi speak. i literally didn't notice until i got the dvd and took a good look at the intro.
ahh i can't wait for the new season!!!!!!!!!!
best line ever - "sometimes when i bust rhymes i lose ... confidence"
now i'm off to look for a picture of albi the racist dragon for my avie!
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YOU SOUND LIKE YOU'RE FROM LONDON!
wah. he looks just like my ex boyfriend, and now they're BOTH out of reach. TWO DAGGERS IN MY HEART
While I like BrEt more, I agree that he has a sexy mouth. He can motorboat me anytime.
Oh how I love F.O.T.C.
Lucky woman, whoever she is.
He has the sexiest mouth I've ever seen on a man.
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Submitted by DeeDee on August 19, 2008 - 9:32am.
@FatMartha
Wha?!?! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! *hangs her head with Clarisse*
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*comforts the two of you* I really hate to be the bearer of bad news.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NF57D0_VV_k
There's his hot ass in LOTR to cheer you up!!
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Hi5.
God. WTF.
This is NOT OK.
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Whenever you feel fat, just look at one of your pinkies. I love my pinkies. - MK, duh.
@FatMartha
Wha?!?! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! *hangs her head with Clarisse*
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Girls with large kolaches shouldn't be talking all Slitty! ~Sluttsville
Oh boo - I love him too.
Business hours are over, bay-beh.
Submitted by DeeDee on August 19, 2008 - 9:16am.
Oh well. I like Bret more anyway.....so step off bitches!
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But... Bret is married too! To a chick who made a documentary on his character in "Lord of the Rings" (yes, he was in LOTR)!
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Hi5.
Maybe i watch too much BBC, but i got no clue who this is.
*hangs head*
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Blah...blah...blah...jack me off and pour me some lemonade. -Michael K
that clip was awesome
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Fuck 'Em If They Can't Take A Joke
a message from the Church of the SubGenius
Oh well. I like Bret more anyway.....so step off bitches!
☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺
Girls with large kolaches shouldn't be talking all Slitty! ~Sluttsville