I'll Believe It When I See It
That's the face JLo made when she first saw Skeletor's dehydrated slug peen. It's also the face she's going to make when she's competes in a triathlon next month. Yes, she's actually going through with that shit!
JLo was on "Good Morning America" today where she talked about training for the 22nd Annual Malibu Triathlon. JLo will have to run, swim and bike her way around Malibu. Yeah, fucking right. More like shop, eat and fart her way through Malibu!
JLo said she got the idea while she was knocked up with the Dragon Tales twins, "It came up when I was eight months pregnant, when I was beached like a whale. I was watching TV, and I saw a triathlon and I said, 'I think I could do that.' ... Maybe we could raise some money and do something really great." JLo will donate any money raised to the Children's Hospital of Los Angeles.
She has even started a blog to share her "tips" on training for a triathlon. This bitch must be drinking from Skeletor's stash of virgin blood! JLo offering tips?! Tip #1 is: Get someone else to do it for you!
Seriously, they need to watch this jelly ham from start to finish. She's going to do the old switcheroo! While some dude in a ratty wig and a pillow down his pants does the race, JLo will be in her all-white trailer, getting her make-up done.
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DeeDee, I always put on a face full of make-up before I work out! Especially lip-liner. One must look one's best while sweating like a beast....lol
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what's the matter with your life? why you gotta mess with mine? don't be sweatin' what I do, cause I'm gonna be just fine...
-Salt n Pepa "None of Your Business"
MK, congratulations on finding the absolute worst picture of this skank...
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Lead me not into temptation.
I can find my own way there.
How can you workout with all that makeup? My skin would seriously rebel if I tried that shit.
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Girls with large kolaches shouldn't be talking all Slitty! ~Sluttsville
JLO squandered her opportunities for a serious film career with too many "side" projects......
and flops.
Holy shit , is she wearing fucking falsies to work out?!?! Moron.
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"I want a butt ugly slut with a bad drankin' problem and jealous old man in jail "- Roger Alan Wade
LMAO IG! Those feelings didn't come until I delivered.
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Girls with large kolaches shouldn't be talking all Slitty! ~Sluttsville
Wow, the hot dogs around her neck rival those of Kimora Lee Simmons.
Bitch is exhausting.
www.reluctantwhore.com
www.cafepress.com/reluctantwhore
i think J. Lo is the most ambitious woman in the entertainment industry. she was among the first singers to have a fashion line, perfumes...
she can do this.
Submitted by islandgirl on August 18, 2008 - 11:01am.
Submitted by DeeDee on August 18, 2008 - 12:59pm.
When I was 8 months pregs, I thought about nurseries, breastfeeding, and food. Running a marathon.....pffttt.
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I was thinking about strangling the bastard that knocked me up. But that's just me. :)
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LMAO
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"I want a butt ugly slut with a bad drankin' problem and jealous old man in jail "- Roger Alan Wade
Wasn't she being courted by Scientology a while back? Perhaps, like many have pointed out, that like Katie she's doing this after going through the "Purification Rundown." I've NO effing idea if that's true, just seems a really strange coincidence.
http://kismets-kitty.stumbleupon.com
Submitted by DeeDee on August 18, 2008 - 12:59pm.
When I was 8 months pregs, I thought about nurseries, breastfeeding, and food. Running a marathon.....pffttt.
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I was thinking about strangling the bastard that knocked me up. But that's just me. :)
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"You're a tool. And do you know why? It's because you're a ginge, Fintan. A dirty, freckly ginge."
Submitted by FritoDorito on August 18, 2008 - 10:58am.
...JLo's list of accommodations for this event. All white candles, white skittles, water made from the tears of poor people who can't afford Louis Vuitton... you know, the usual.
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BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!
(¯`'•.¸(¯`'•.¸♥¸.•'´¯)¸.•'´¯)
Roseanne writes, "jon voight your evil spawn angelina jolie and her vacuous hubby brad pitt make about forty million dollars a year in violent psychopathic movies and give away three of it to starving children trying to look as if they give a crap about humanity as they spit out more dunces that will consume more than their fair share and wreck the earth even more. (just sayin')."
Hi missy! ♥♥
JLo was thinking about running a marathon while 8 months pregnant? Who does that? When I was 8 months pregs, I thought about nurseries, breastfeeding, and food. Running a marathon.....pffttt.
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Girls with large kolaches shouldn't be talking all Slitty! ~Sluttsville
The people who are arranging this thing should expect to get JLo's list of accommodations for this event. All white candles, white skittles, water made from the tears of poor people who can't afford Louis Vuitton... you know, the usual.
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"I want a butt ugly slut with a bad drankin' problem and jealous old man in jail "- Roger Alan Wade
I believe she could do it, if she trains....but I think she'll pull a Katiebot, and get a ride halfway through, and then run to the finish....
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what's the matter with your life? why you gotta mess with mine? don't be sweatin' what I do, cause I'm gonna be just fine...
-Salt n Pepa "None of Your Business"
Submitted by LOVE CARROTTOP on August 18, 2008 - 11:54am.
hahahaa! *poking holes in cardboard*
yup!
hey IG!!♥
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Fuck 'Em If They Can't Take A Joke
a message from the Church of the SubGenius
Ugh, I hate the term "beached whale" when used as a reference for a pregnancy.
There's no way in hell she's going to run this. She's going to have herself cloned and have her "twin" run it for her. Please. We all know your secrets, bitch.
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I am Mexican and and I do think Michael Bay's "Transformers" is racist.
I love how shes in full airbrushed makeup for working out.
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Dick happens! - MK
Camel Toe!!!!!
Hey missy! Do you have your eclipse goggles ready for when it hits late afternoon and JLo's ass blocks out the sun?
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Yes, ees gud. Now, if you pees shut mouf, we say nice prayer to God.
Whatever trickery Diddy and Katie Holmes pulled off during their marathons, apparently JLo found out about it and will use it for a little publicity. I expect nothing less from her. Twins didn't pull enough attention, so it's on to the next stunt.
Missy!! ♥
Jenny from the block will be puking halfway around it. Stay the hell home with your crotch fruit!
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"You're a tool. And do you know why? It's because you're a ginge, Fintan. A dirty, freckly ginge."
when training for a triathalon, it's always best to work up to it, accomplishing smaller milestone challenges first.
in her case, she might want to attempt actually walking through her own house bacsue you know she has jetson conveyor belts or possibly a roman bed carried by six buff dudes. "take me to the hair salong in sector five, slaves!"
Submitted by Salem13 on August 18, 2008 - 12:49pm.
I just hope those scientist have their seismometer ready.
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LMAO!
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Yes, ees gud. Now, if you pees shut mouf, we say nice prayer to God.
hi slutties!!♥♥
I wonder how much energy was put into "which jewelry should j-lo wear for her training"
some days I REALLY hate celebs. like today.
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Fuck 'Em If They Can't Take A Joke
a message from the Church of the SubGenius
Oh Christ what's with the supermom act? Go take care of your spawn you just HAD to have, ya dipshit.
(¯`'•.¸(¯`'•.¸♥¸.•'´¯)¸.•'´¯)
Roseanne writes, "jon voight your evil spawn angelina jolie and her vacuous hubby brad pitt make about forty million dollars a year in violent psychopathic movies and give away three of it to starving children trying to look as if they give a crap about humanity as they spit out more dunces that will consume more than their fair share and wreck the earth even more. (just sayin')."
U mean Jello is going to sweat, in Public! I dont believe this... Total blasphemy.
Perhaps she just wants to get away from the kids... And that Skeletor person.
**** "I Love Lamp" ****
I just hope those scientist have their seismometer ready.
she is a brave bitch to wear spandex? like that
:(
George Carlin went to Heaven and left us with Dane Cook here in Hell
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You know, I rather like this God fellow. Very theatrical, you know. Pestilence here, a plague there. Omnipotence ... gotta get me some of that
so now she wants to go buck wild with the roids and training and be the tan version of Vadge? Ho can't come up with anything original.
glad her fugness is raising money for charity. pray she's stop wearing fur. bring it full circle JLo.
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Blogs aren't for the sensitive at heart - FU
I'm NOT an economist, I'm an optimist. GW Bush
I think the main pic says it all "I'm going to choooooooke ya'll!"
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Girls with large kolaches shouldn't be talking all Slitty! ~Sluttsville
I don't know how she's going to do it, carrying that gigantic ass around....i guess she loves the challenge.....
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"Home remedy #108: IF YOU HAVE A BAD COUGH, TAKE A LARGE DOSE OF LAXATIVES. THEN YOU'LL
BE AFRAID TO COUGH.
meh - goodforher - idon'tcare
*****
I'm a proud SP!
http://www.myspace.com/luscious_t_999
~~~~looks like it's about time for a new avatar~~~
What is it like a 20 minute race for all three things combined? Or is she going to have someone compete in parts for her like tommygirl's zombie bride did running that marathon.
I really don't care that much, but it would be funny if she got herself a really bad case of runner's diarrhea.
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"WOLVERIIIINES!"
Submitted by islandgirl on August 18, 2008 - 9:42am.
Hahaha, Viva!! She'll jog a few steps and duck around the corner and climb into a limo.
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and be wearing 4 inch heels the next day, right?
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The whole earth may be sucked into hell, and you want my help 'cause your girlfriend's a big 'ho?
I'll be standing at the halfway mark when she vomits, passes out, and gives up.
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Yes, ees gud. Now, if you pees shut mouf, we say nice prayer to God.
2Di4 on August 18, 2008 - 11:41am.
and i always work out in GINORMOUS hoop earrings.
and I blow out my hair and get makeup done too before training
Frankly my dear, I don't give a Damn!! "Rhett Butler"
Haha! That's the face she made when they told her what a triathlon is!
♥ ThreadKilla! / Lean Like a Chola / She's a Lady.
I can only find pictures of the girl twin.
Hahaha, Viva!! She'll jog a few steps and duck around the corner and climb into a limo. I suppose she has to do SOMETHING to stay relevant.
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"You're a tool. And do you know why? It's because you're a ginge, Fintan. A dirty, freckly ginge."
You know those trainers are laughing their asses off at her, with her designer sunglasses and workout clothes. Bitch really thinks she can do it! HIGHlarious.
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Hi5.
That lycra ain't doing her any favors.
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ruFItmix58A&feature=related
Wow, can't wait to see that. It all sounds very un-JLO if you ask me.
and i always work out in GINORMOUS hoop earrings.
she's mental. the woman has absolutely zero muscle tone!
Wow. is she going to do it the same way Katie Holmes did?
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The whole earth may be sucked into hell, and you want my help 'cause your girlfriend's a big 'ho?
I look like im better fit that she is to run a triathlon does she even realize how much training it requires?
I mean Im pretty sure I can do one but I will end up last behind the disable people : (
Frankly my dear, I don't give a Damn!! "Rhett Butler"
J.Lo has always had a very ugly and man-like face to me...a man face she tries to cover up under seventy pounds of MAC Viva Glam drag queen shit. NOT attractive. Too bad she lost her body, really the only good feature she had.
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http://www.myspace.com/rainbowsrule
The Hollywood machine loves a happy homewrecker. In fact, they worship them. They even give them $14 million for pictures of their chosen ones. - Our beloved MK