Wednesday, August 13th 2008
He Already Has The Gold Medal In Douchebaggery
Everyone is talking about the Olympics. I've even caught my dog humming the Olympic theme every now and again. In honor of the Olympics, NY Magazine asked Diddy if there were a new Olympic sport that he thinks he could win the gold medal in, what would it be? You know he's been waiting for this question. I'm surprised he didn't say he would win the gold in "moisturizing the sexy."
Instead he said, "Who could have sex the longest. I think that's an event I can do well in. And probably who could stay up the longest. Just so you know, that's supposed to be funny. Even though I am serious."
It would have to be a solo event. He would also get extra points for screaming his own name and cumming douche water.
duuuuh...he's mastered the art of having sex with enough females to have several bastard (official definition so nobody's offended:the illegitimate offspring of unmarried parents) children so I imagine he's trained his dick to stay up for long periods of time, feeling little to no pleasure and thinking about Fonsworth Bentley
Guys that have to brag that much about sex are usually hung like dwarf hamsters.
Are we all still operating on the faux premise that Puff Diddy Sean Combs is a sex symbol of some type? I thought we all ignored that memo, cause I did.
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"I've been known to have a bit of a temper problem, when betrayed."
- Theodore Bagwell
Does his mouth EVER close?
Gonnaburn!!!! Good to "see" you again dear! :) It only happened like a couple times MANY years ago...there is so much and nothing (consciously)involved in the act--its almost like meditation--there is not supposed to be intention and manipulation--it just happens with many factors going right...no books or watching vids or anything--just passion and wanting to connect deeper for both parties and it just happened it was over a course of two/three days--amazing...fast forward 5 years later and I have as much hate for this man as I did love (prolly more hate)...barf
Love ya Gb!
This ugly bitch gets a lot of coverage because of his drug money just like Jay-Z. I am sick and tired of seeing these Fuglies on all online blogs and magazine.
Enough of this shit. I vote for a castoff.
Submitted by AntBee on August 13, 2008 - 1:21pm.
The world is just not ready to know how much I loathe this motherfucker.
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If you feel as deeply disgusted at Diddy as I do at Michael Bay, then you can bet my sweet ass I'm ready.
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Sorrow is knowledge, those that know the most must mourn the deepest, the tree of knowledge is not the tree of life. -- Lord Byron
So when is someone going to drop Diddy and Kanye to the bottom of a deep well?!
*****"Don't have sex, because you will get pregnant and die. Don't have sex in the missionary position, don't have sex standing up, just don't do it, OK, promise? OK, now everybody take some rubbers."*****
The world is just not ready to know how much I loathe this motherfucker.
You so ugly, you look like you got superpowers
Yeh a solo event for sure. I'm sure Diddy's idea of sex is gaping at himself in the mirror while he whacks off.
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A7OlA_Vjwz4
Submitted by Triscuit on August 13, 2008 - 1:15pm.
Submitted by Mawy on August 13, 2008 - 12:39pm.
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Ha! Shame.
♥ ThreadKilla! / Lean Like a Chola / She's a Lady.
I can only find pictures of the girl twin.
One thing he'd win at is the mouth-open games. 'Cause he can't shut his. Looks like he's catching flies.
sucha lie teller
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¿donde está machín?
Submitted by Mawy on August 13, 2008 - 12:39pm.
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
LmFao!
I heard he actually goes into clubs and taps into their sound systems and shouts himself out!
"Uh,Yeah"
"Bad Boy"
"We don't stop,Cause we can't stop"
LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Submitted by Sheeps on August 13, 2008 - 9:53am.
She says he's able to last forever and intentionally does not come.
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I understand holding out, but not at all? Makes no sense to me.....where's the release? If there's no release, it just sounds like all the sex I had throughout my 20's!
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Just when every day seemed to greet me with a smile; sun spots are fading, now I'm doing time, now I'm doing time.....
-Soundgarden "Fell On Black Days"
Submitted by EastEndGirl on August 13, 2008 - 10:01am.
At first you think "oh wow am I a lucky girl".
Then you start making the grocery list in your head.
'zactly, sistah.
frankly I like to get my rocks off and be done with it.
if I can finish him off by giving him a hand job while making the bed, so much the better.
Submitted by Mrs.Kravitz on August 13, 2008 - 9:56am.
You are funny.
At first you think "oh wow am I a lucky girl".
Then you start making the grocery list in your head.
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pathetic is chatting with bitch of crazy mouth
Funny Bitch LoLo as FLA
Submitted by Mrs.Kravitz on August 13, 2008 - 9:56am.
oh fuck that noise, I got stuff to do.
Well, I think that's the attraction: when you're done, you get off and start the laundry or head out for lunch.
Submitted by Sheeps on August 13, 2008 - 9:53am.
She says he's able to last forever and intentionally does not come.
oh fuck that noise, I got stuff to do.
Submitted by BRADIFUL BITCH on August 13, 2008 - 11:28am.
Um, methinks Sting would sweep this category. Anyone tried/engage in Tantric sex?
(1) I bet a lot of us have seen yoga instructors who could hold a difficult pose for a very long time, without sweating or quivering, and while talking calmly to the class the whole time. (2) I know a (very honest) woman whose ex-husband is into it. His girlfriends are younger than his daughter and reportedly very satisfied. She says he's able to last forever and intentionally does not come.
Man I hate this dolphin-mouthed douchebag.
"cumming douche water"..lmfao.
☠
"That was the most ludicrous pack of verbal peanut butter buttfuck I have ever read." ~DebFrmHell
http://www.myspace.com/zoloftpony
Submitted by Sluttsville on August 13, 2008 - 8:56am.
They do have competitions for this....I swear...here are 3 clips from YouTube.
I know! My friend's a former gold medalist!
Pudge claims he's the 60-minute man
more like 60 seconds
Look a here girls I'm telling you now
They call me "Lovin' Dan"
I rock 'em, roll 'em all night long
I'm a sixty-minute man
If you don't believe I'mm all that I say
Come up and take my hand
When I let you go you'll cry "Oh yes,"
"He's a sixty-minute man
There'll be 15 minutes of kissing
Then you'll holler "please don't stop"
There'll be 15 minutes of teasing
And 15 minutes of squeezing
And 15 minutes of blowing my top
If your man ain't treating you right
Come up and see ol' Dan
I rock 'em, roll 'em all night long
The DListed Judges just gave Diddy a PERFECT 10 for Douchery.
This reminds me of Dave Chappelle in Diddy costume...
"I can't stop. I won't stop. Eh eh, eh eh" (all while harlem shaking)
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Submitted by DivasGone on August 13, 2008 - 12:12pm.
I COMPLETELY agree. There have only been a handful of times where I've done it for more than 30-45 minutes, and by the end I was ready for it to be over! What's the point of doing it all night if you're going to be walking bowlegged the rest of the week?
Shut UP Didiot!
I cannot stand that this man has my birthday....I am just glad it is a different year...
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Just when every day seemed to greet me with a smile; sun spots are fading, now I'm doing time, now I'm doing time.....
-Soundgarden "Fell On Black Days"
What woman with any control over her senses would want to lie underneath that thing for hours at a time, getting sweated on and having his milk breath in her face??? He probably has to think about Tommy Boy to finally 'get there'.
He just landed the 'quad' in the men's solo douchebaggery event.
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Surfing the apocalypse.
If ya hafta brag about it, it usually ain't true. This guy is so full of shit....he actally used to be white.
He said that! Oh I just threw up in my mouth... I wouldn't let that buck-toothed burnt french fry chew the bunions off my dead aunt's feet.
Ki Ki Dallas
Anyone can stay up late and fuck a long time with the right kind of blow...
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"yes, DUH, I am a low rent whore"
I predict that if/when human cloning is a reality, he will sign up and then have sex non-stop with the unfortunate clone. You know he fingers himself when on top of his baby momma, imagining BizarroDiddy riding him hard.
@Sluttsville: Funnay! Now there aresome Olympic events you might actually catch me watching real time.
♥ ThreadKilla! / Lean Like a Chola / She's a Lady.
I can only find pictures of the girl twin.
I don't get the appeal of having sex for hours on end. Even when it's good, I only want so much of it. There is only so much dirty talk and rollin' around in your own sweat a person can do before you start looking at your watch thinking, "I wonder what Dr. Phil is about today."
Besides, I don't want to get chafed. You can KEEP that Gold, Diddy!
*throwing back medal*
you know his "baby mama", or whatever she is kim porter feels like a winner when is being talked down on about being some simple sex thing. that is "his woman", right? moisturizing the sexy, HAHA.
Yes, some boys can power bottom for quite some time. Me, however, I'm only good for about 30 minutes and then I have to go.
xo
Kevin Clamato Juice (Click it, bitches! My official myspace)
They do have competitions for this....I swear...here are 3 clips from Youtube.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=67lnwPawANw
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AbTSmOS_m6Q
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yLKizQoejuw
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She's not kidding. I'm gonna whip ya silly and I'm gonna fuck ya stupid.
A 1,000 flies were caught the night that picture was taken.
who gives a caca diddy!! arrrrgh
Anyone can be a power bottom for a long time, right? I'm just guessing.
Submitted by Newportjoey on August 13, 2008 - 10:37am.
I'd prefer Robert Downey Jr. to this human stain......
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who wouldn't????
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Sorrow is knowledge, those that know the most must mourn the deepest, the tree of knowledge is not the tree of life. -- Lord Byron
I bet Michael Phelps has a big one.
xo
Kevin Clamato Juice (Click it, bitches! My official myspace)
Submitted by EvilShoe on August 13, 2008 - 10:43am.
There could be serious competition among the hollyweird fucktards with a mouth breathing category at the Olympics.
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Jinx! LOL!
"This ain't rock n roll. This is genocide!"
... and then he woke up and realized he wasn't Frank Sinatra, Dean Martin, Milton Berle or Dillinger -- so he just jerked off to their memory instead.
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Boats n' Hoes, gotta have me my boats n' hoes.
www.myspace.com/dreamhypnotique
Submitted by angry mom on August 13, 2008 - 11:32am
Angry- Missed you the other day! Didn't mean to diss. *Rudely pushing into convo w/BB* Did you read a book or take a class like they show on HBO Real Sex all the time??
Submitted by Laura on August 13, 2008 - 10:28am.
Does he ever close his mouth? Ever?
DooDoo WOULD take the gold if mouf-breaving was a sport.
"This ain't rock n roll. This is genocide!"
There could be serious competition among the hollyweird fucktards with a mouth breathing category at the Olympics.
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Dick happens! - MK
I have the feeling that Michael Phelps or Dara Torres or about 3,000 other people at the Olympics would not even be breaking a sweat while Diddy is already asleep, drool seeping from his horsey mouth.
Ugh, what a loser. Guy is funny looking.. I don't know if it's the mouth or what but something just isn't right...