Let's Try This Again
The last time Brit Brit gave an interview to OK! Magazine, London went caca times all over an expensive dress, and Brit ran off with a bunch of other clothes. That was almost two years ago. Brit Brit decided to try it again. She just finished an exclusive interview with OK! and she was on her best behavior. That's probably because Daddy Spears sat next to her with a jumbo bag of Cheetos. Get through the interview, get the Cheetos.
MSNBC's The Scoop reports that the issue will hit stands this week. Brit Brit wasn't the only one who talked to OK!. Daddy Spears actually opened his mouth and said something. He probably wanted to say "help," but instead he ended up talking about KFed, Brit Brit's management and other boring stuff.
Speaking of London, where is that haggard ho?! Instead of talking to boring ass Brit Brit, OK! should have tracked down London! I keep asking about him, because I really want to know. I pray he's sitting on an island somewhere with a bunch of other bitches, sippin' Henny and writing his tell-all.
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Submitted by Your Mom Ate th... on August 12, 2008 - 1:08pm.
:) Well i have acne and i live in brooklyn and i get "jellis" of this fat whore Brit Brit MULA!
My pain, my pleasure, my heart, my world.
Submitted by kevin clamato on August 12, 2008 - 12:41pm.
Ew, I hate Manhattans. I only drink vodka martinis str8 up. Cunt.Gravy, check my myspace. Haha. Indiana? lol.
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Why is myspace such a huge deal? It's not a calling card.
Submitted by kevin clamato on August 12, 2008 - 12:06pm.
I'm in love with everyone. I have so much love inside of me that I'm about to puke rainbows and lucky charms.
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Hey, I shit roses and puke rainbows! Wanna go jogging in Central Park???
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Sorrow is knowledge, those that know the most must mourn the deepest, the tree of knowledge is not the tree of life. -- Lord Byron
Submitted by DeeDee on August 12, 2008 - 10:04am.
Britney uses Tang as tanner.
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hahahahahhaaa
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When I was feeding on the need for you know me, devastated at the rate you fell below me;
what wasted unconditional love, on somebody,
who doesn't believe in the stuff......
- Fiona Apple "Oh Well"
Submitted by Angelina Jolie-Pitt on August 12, 2008 - 12:05pm.
im not fat
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No, but I am! I'm a big-assed Midwestern bitch from Iowa and I eat raw potatoes from the farm next door.
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Sorrow is knowledge, those that know the most must mourn the deepest, the tree of knowledge is not the tree of life. -- Lord Byron
Listen ladies.
I just got back from St. Louis, and believe you me, NYC's got NUTHIN' on that place.
FFS, they've got the International Bowling Hall of Fame and Museum. And The Muny, the nation's oldest and largest outdoor theatre just held 6, count'em, 6 sold out nights of Fiddler on the Roof.
"If I were a rich man."
And most importantly, it's the home of Budweiser.
Top that!
Manhattan--PPPPPPPPPPFFFFFFFFTTTTTTTTTTT
Submitted by Cunt.Gravy on August 12, 2008 - 12:04pm.
You are a gotdamn genius! Bravo!!! Bravo!!
Thanks for making things interesting in here!
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"yes, DUH, I am a low rent whore"
I'm going to work being more of a fat ugly Midwestern whore housewife.
#1 Move to the Midwest, where ever that is.
#2 Buy map of the USA.
#3 Find a Midwestern dude that wants to marry a fat ugly Midwestern whore housewife wannabe. This might take a awhile, although K-Fed is apparently still available.
mmmm.. that pic of her makes me want to eat french fries!
she's greezy!
☆★your☆★soul☆★has☆★been☆★☆eated★☆
C'mon, you know you want to.. www.seekingdesperately.blogspot.com/ ..it's ok- I won't tell..
OMG, I just want a tangtini now. I hope they still sell Tang. Imma go to Duane Reade. I bet they have that shit up in there.
And yes, Missy, Times Square is a Disney joke, don't mess with my East Village and Lower East Side though. Haha. I miss the hookers and sex shops along 42 St. Disney would burn in flames if they came to the East Village or LES, though. ;-P
I'm in love with everyone. I have so much love inside of me that I'm about to puke rainbows and lucky charms.
xo
Kevin Clamato Juice (Click it, bitches! My official myspace)
Submitted by DeeDee on August 12, 2008 - 11:59am.
I love you horz, BIG BUTTS and all! ♥
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I heartz you as well, DeeDee! I won't give you an underpants muffin, but you can have my latest issue of the Harriet Carter catalog.
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Sorrow is knowledge, those that know the most must mourn the deepest, the tree of knowledge is not the tree of life. -- Lord Byron
im not fat
My pain, my pleasure, my heart, my world.
Submitted by Cunt.Gravy on August 12, 2008 - 11:29am.
You cunts are just jealous because Britney has beauty and money and you are all just a bunch of fat ugly Midwestern whore housewives.
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Uhh, excuse me, it's JELLUS. And I have beauty, thank you very much. How else would I get my Crisco tubs at half price? SALES? Pff.
Submitted by Cunt.Gravy on August 12, 2008 - 12:04pm.
dude, you are COOKED
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Fuck 'Em If They Can't Take A Joke
a message from the Church of the SubGenius
Britney uses Tang as tanner.
☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺
Girls with large kolaches shouldn't be talking all Slitty! ~Sluttsville
I met Britney one time. It was a pool party in the Hollywood Hills. She was completely wasted on meds and booze, her blonde weave disheveled but her lips still sensuously moist. She curled her upper lip in a way that spelled danger and tipped her head toward the bedroom door. Her silent invite was mesmerizing and I couldn't speak. I shyly followed her into the master bedroom with full-ceiling skylight and watched as she perched herself on the corner of the bed.
I sat beside her, unsure of what to say. She took my hands in hers and, looking me directly in the eye, she said, "People can take everything away from you, but they can never take away your truth. But the question is...can you handle mine?" She slipped her tongue into my mouth slowly at first, shyly exploring with little flicks like a salmon swimming upstream. I gasped in delight as she unbuttoned my bra, raking her press-ons into my back as I convulsed against her nubile, quivering body. She cood with animalistic pleasure as I cupped her breasts in my hand, my thumbs gently caressing her nipples and distended areolae, her throaty baritone stuttering with nirvana.
I held her milky udders as she began to probe deeper into my mouth with her tongue, my Delta of Venus burning with erotic abandon as Britney began to fondle my shuddering loins. As her kiss became deeper, I became lost in the moment, bewitched by the spell she held on me, and approaching the precipice of my feminine passion. I kissed Britney deeper still, becoming one with her as our limbs intertwined almost gagging to death on the chunky remnants of her Chinese fast food dinner that began spewing forth from her mighty gullet into my mouth. Retching with disgust and strange arousal, I wiped my face, a wild woman. Britney was an animal, feral and dangerous. "Oops, I did it again," she cried, quickly re-snapping her garters and putting on her white flip-flops as she rushed out of the door toward her bodyguard and out of my life. I am haunted still by the tragedy I saw in her deeply wise eyes, and as I lay there in a pool of sweat, vaginal fluid, vomit, and chop suey, I died inside, knowing I could never be one with such a rapturous creature as she for more than night, for it was in her most fleeting and spontaneous moments that she was the most beautiful and free.
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“I like it, ... but it's yellow, and I'm like, I didn't want yellow for my engagement ring.” - Paris Hilton
“What's a soup kitchen?” - Paris Hilton
Submitted by Your Mom Ate th... on August 12, 2008 - 1:02pm.
DOOKIE?
My pain, my pleasure, my heart, my world.
Submitted by angelsoverme13 on August 12, 2008 - 12:02pm.
cutest fucking photo EVER!
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Fuck 'Em If They Can't Take A Joke
a message from the Church of the SubGenius
BROOKLYN IN THE HOUSE YOU FUCKING WHORES WE ARE NOT DISNEY YET BITCHES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1
My pain, my pleasure, my heart, my world.
Submitted by Angelina Jolie-Pitt on August 12, 2008 - 12:00pm.
Submitted by Your Mom Ate th... on August 12, 2008 - 12:56pm.
what is an underpants muffin ? ha ha ha
is that like when you shart?
Like a muffin top? IM NOT FAT! WHO TOLD YOU IM FAT???????
Give me a taco? please? ha ha haa!!!!
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Top o'the Muffin to Ya!
You know--an UNDERPANTS muffin *pfffft!* Did it leave trackmarks? Who knows??
Tacos cause one to bake many underpants muffins.
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Sorrow is knowledge, those that know the most must mourn the deepest, the tree of knowledge is not the tree of life. -- Lord Byron
Eyebrows. Sigh.
"I'm the whoriest whore whoever whored and I still wouldn't get with that." ~ MK
NYC can suck a big fat one. Disney bullshit of a city.
_____________________________________________
Fuck 'Em If They Can't Take A Joke
a message from the Church of the SubGenius
Submitted by Green Is Good on August 12, 2008 - 12:56pm.
Bitch- We don't roll in SUV's. It's mini van all the way! Respect. :)
Geez, I leave DListed for a couple of weeks and a bunch of worthless posters show up.
What bug crawled up Cunt.Gravy's ass and died? Chill the hell out.
ALL DLISTED NEWBIES: below are the Dlisted Guidelines. If you cant' follow them, go visit Just Jared or Pigez Hilton...or take the short bus.
1. We hate ALL celebrities and snark on all of them.
2. MK is our host and we are his loyal guppies.
3. Play nice with other posters and don't start any shit with each other.
4. Don't feed the trolls and spammers.
I love Britney. Went to her birthday party at Plumm a few years ago. She was fucking fun as hell. OK, maybe now we're friends. Do I know you? Hmmm....Cunt.Gravy sounds very familiar. Hahahahaha.
xo
Kevin Clamato Juice (Click it, bitches! My official myspace)
cunt gravy are you Solange Knowles?
My pain, my pleasure, my heart, my world.
AAARRRGGGGHHHHHHHHH.......
that's all.
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When I was feeding on the need for you know me, devastated at the rate you fell below me;
what wasted unconditional love, on somebody,
who doesn't believe in the stuff......
- Fiona Apple "Oh Well"
Submitted by Stoney on August 12, 2008 - 11:57am.
Submitted by Your Mom Ate th... on August 12, 2008 - 11:49am.
"Oh my god! Little soaps from Taaaaarget! I'm gonna buy them all up and put them in a basket lined with a doily and put them on a shelf in my bathroom!" (SNL)
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I don't remember that skit! Who was that?
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Sorrow is knowledge, those that know the most must mourn the deepest, the tree of knowledge is not the tree of life. -- Lord Byron
Submitted by Your Mom Ate th... on August 12, 2008 - 12:56pm.
what is an underpants muffin ? ha ha ha
is that like when you shart?
Like a muffin top? IM NOT FAT! WHO TOLD YOU IM FAT???????
Give me a taco? please? ha ha haa!!!!
My pain, my pleasure, my heart, my world.
Haha. I've lived in Manhattan most of my life. Lol, Long Island was for 5 years. You do know Brooklyn is part of Long Island, right? And actually, Brooklyn is the coolest borough in NYC. I'm actually thinking of moving there from Manhattan. Ugh, I guess we just can't get along with Cunt.Gravy. You're too funny. It's almost sad.
xo
Kevin Clamato Juice (Click it, bitches! My official myspace)
I'm sorry Kevin. I just get crazy when people bad-talk my girl Britney. I live in NYC too. It is good to know you are not a Long Islandite.
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“I like it, ... but it's yellow, and I'm like, I didn't want yellow for my engagement ring.” - Paris Hilton
“What's a soup kitchen?” - Paris Hilton
It finally came in the mail!!! Now I'll have something to wear to the farm show tonight!
http://www.serengeticatalog.com/itemdy00.asp?c=t&T1=W3911+M&SKW=+cat%20t...
I love you horz, BIG BUTTS and all! ♥
☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺
Girls with large kolaches shouldn't be talking all Slitty! ~Sluttsville
Submitted by Mrs.Kravitz on August 12, 2008 - 11:57am.
LMAO
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"yes, DUH, I am a low rent whore"
Submitted by Cunt.Gravy on August 12, 2008 - 12:36pm.
None of you has even had a drink called a Manhattan, let alone been to that stylish and urban resort city.
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Meh. I was BORN in Manhattan, bitch. NYU Medical Center. Recognize.
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Sorrow is knowledge, those that know the most must mourn the deepest, the tree of knowledge is not the tree of life. -- Lord Byron
I see the stalker troll is still amoung us.....No?
Submitted by Your Mom Ate th... on August 12, 2008 - 11:49am.
"Oh my god! Little soaps from Taaaaarget! I'm gonna buy them all up and put them in a basket lined with a doily and put them on a shelf in my bathroom!" (SNL)
__________________________________________
"yes, DUH, I am a low rent whore"
Hi M.E.!!!!!!
You want a fried baloney sammich with Miracle Whip on Wonder Bread toast?
I got the recipe from www.fatmidwesternhousewives.com/recipes
Submitted by kevin clamato on August 12, 2008 - 11:52am.
Hahaha. Me is who I is. Aw, now we're all friends again! Peace and love in this world. Goodness gracious, I need to exfoliate today. Who wants to go jogging in Central Park with me???
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Ha ha ha! I'll hop into my fat ugly Midwestern whore housewives soccer Mom SUV and meet you by the Dakota in 8 1/2 hours. Traffic, ya know...
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WISH GRANTED! >:)
myspace.com/draya23
Submitted by Angelina Jolie-Pitt on August 12, 2008 - 11:54am.
I have a penis and i cant bake anything.
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Oh, really? I heard you can bake a great underpants muffin!
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Sorrow is knowledge, those that know the most must mourn the deepest, the tree of knowledge is not the tree of life. -- Lord Byron
Mrs.Kravitz on August 12, 2008 - 12:53pm
Tangatini's, CHEERS!
*clinkclink*
/\
Madolyn: What do you expect coming in here?
Billy Costigan: I have to come here.
Madolyn: I know you have to come here, but now that you're here, what do you want?
Billy Costigan: You want the truth? Valium.
Submitted by Salem13 on August 12, 2008 - 9:52am.
Her hot dog lookin skin makes me feel amazing about my glowing rice paper casper skin.
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do you mean the last hotdog left in the water that's all split and dark on one side and light on the bottom. I could see that
☼•☼•☼•☼•☼•☼•☼•☼•☼•☼•☼•☼•☼•☼•☼•☼•☼•☼•☼•☼•☼•☼•☼•☼•☼•☼•
If all the world and love were young,
And truth in every shepherd's tongue,
These pretty pleasures might me move
To live with thee and be thy love.
Hmmmm.....Tang and Vodka. Interesting. Imma make a Tang martini at my bar this weekend and credit it all to Mrs. Kravitz. Do they still sell Tang?
xo
Kevin Clamato Juice (Click it, bitches! My official myspace)
kevin clamato on August 12, 2008 - 12:52pm
I'm friending you later at CrackSpace.
/\
Madolyn: What do you expect coming in here?
Billy Costigan: I have to come here.
Madolyn: I know you have to come here, but now that you're here, what do you want?
Billy Costigan: You want the truth? Valium.
Oh, gross Kevin Clamato. You're from Long Island. Never fuckin' mind, that's worse than the rest of them put together. I'm sure you just can't stop wearing Ed Hardy and putting super-duper extra-strong-hold LA Looks hair gel into your super spiky hair and wear neon shoes and baggy hoodies and can't stop tanning and wearing tons of lip gloss and showing off your latest Swarovski crystal-studded Sidekick.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
“I like it, ... but it's yellow, and I'm like, I didn't want yellow for my engagement ring.” - Paris Hilton
“What's a soup kitchen?” - Paris Hilton
Submitted by Cunt.Gravy on August 12, 2008 - 12:36pm.
It is not Britney's fault if you are all obese Indiana farm women. Don't hate because you wish you were Britney. None of you has even had a drink called a Manhattan, let alone been to that stylish and urban resort city.
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Sorry to burst your delusion CG, but I'm not obese nor am I from Indiana and I wouldn't know what to do on a farm. I have had plenty of Manhattan's, worked in Manhattan and partied their too.
I can tell you just like to stir the shit but most people are tired of self absorbed celebs who can't deal with their fame *wipes tear*, and carry on like a bunch of asswipes, especially when there are real issues going on in the world.
Submitted by Mrs.Kravitz on August 12, 2008 - 9:52am.
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Ya gotta love modern American popular culture.
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You know it, Mrs. K. Why else do we visit here?
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I didn’t say that it was your fault – I said that I was going to blame you.
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Submitted by Mrs.Kravitz on August 12, 2008 - 11:51am.
Hey, ladies, I got the fabulous new recipe for a red devil cake with mayo, RC Cola and red dye No. 2 from Fat Midwestern Housewives Quarterly.
email me if you want a copy
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Oh, dammit Mrs. K--I don't have your email address and I'm too damn lazy to lift my morbidly obese ass off of this tiny computer chair and go out to the local five & dime to pick up an issue! I've just been eating too much Spam and tater tots.
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Sorrow is knowledge, those that know the most must mourn the deepest, the tree of knowledge is not the tree of life. -- Lord Byron
I have a penis and i cant bake anything.
My pain, my pleasure, my heart, my world.
As long as Pappa Spears keeps Shitney on her meds, he can pass her off as the harmless, lip-synching village idiot.