Dear Andy, White Oprah Is Coming For You
Anderson Cooper filled in for Regis on "Regis & Kelly" this morning and the conversation turned to the Long Island trainwreck known as "Living Lohan."
Andy must have thought he was having cosmos with the girls, because he said, “Ali Lohan is supposed to be 14 but really she’s more like 60." What a bitch! Andy can slap me on the ass and call me 60 any day.
And do you hear that? It's the sound of White Oprah busting out of her third spray tanning session of the day and running to her computer. She's going to put those Lee Press-Ons to fucking work. Andy better shut down his inbox, because here comes one of White Oprah's long ass statements and you know that bitch asks for a return receipt.
White Oprah doesn't know who she's messing with. If that bitch fucks with MAH BOO, I will rip off Ali's annoying choker and use it to whip the bullshit out of White Oprah.
UPDATE: Here's the video of Anderson ripping into "Living Lohan." We truly need to become best girlfriends.
VIA Lainey Gossip
Thanks Debra
Hilarious!!!
Submitted by . on August 6, 2008 - 3:36am.
"-Us women get the men that forget to wipe their furry asses enough and leave hash marks on their tighty whities, wipe their mouths with their sleeves, piss around the toilet and not IN IT, masterbate to women who aren't even realistic looking, think nodding is an answer, cry like titty babies over a fuckin' sliver...eh I could go on but I'm not being fair probably and my beloved could probably list a whole shit load of stuff about me so I'll quit while I'm behind. Not that I'm complaining..........much."
Anderson rocks-
I liked Anderson Cooper after his Hurricane Katrina coverage. Now I love him even more after watching him talk smack about the Lohans. Too damn funny!
I wish I could watch every reality show with him.
Anderson wants to give Kathy Griffin a run for her money. Good for him calling these LolifeHans out.
What 'family issues' is Mr. Cellphone on his waistband talking about?
Submitted by gucci on August 6, 2008 - 5:28pm.
funfunster:
maybe Anderson feels his private life is his business and no one elses. the man's got class; hats off to you again andy!
what a straw man argument. if you are going to protect your private life in toto rather than just select parts of it then i will agree with you. however, considering he has penned an autobiography going into detail about his upbringing, his background, his mother Gloria Vanderbilt and the suicide of his brother, you then can't claim that choosing NOT to speak about a very important part of your persona (remember, what defines you as gay and separates you from the pack is your attraction to someone of the same sex as you) entitles you to defend that decision as having a private life and therefore it's no one's business.
the definition of a person with class is a person with integrity who is true to himself. if all gay people felt the way you do and defended their decision NOT to come out and be true as a matter of privacy then gay people everywhere would not have many of the rights that we have now. and there's much work still to be done.
he's trying to have his cake and eat it too. you're right. he's classy. a classy coward.
funfunster:
maybe Anderson feels his private life is his business and no one elses. the man's got class; hats off to you again andy!
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"When it comes to men, don't pay attention to word they say, but pay attention to absolutely everything they do".
Professor Randy Paush
Being dicreet and claiming to be Hetero are not the same thing by any stretch of the imagination. Let him be who he is. Is that to difficult?
Christianity is the stick they beat people with...lesliesmith2007
"Maybe that's in the episode I didn't see."
AHAHAHAHAHA! Fucking brilliant!
He's one funny man. And small too. He interviewed me once on CNN and I wanted to pick him up like a doll and take him home.
ooohhh!... i didn't know it was straight guy bashing hour!.... and for the record.. i don't have a furry ass or wear tighty whiteys!LOL!
OT: geezus, at this point... what the fuck do i care?
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"Clap for the Wolfman.
He gonna rate your record high.
Clap for the Wolfman.
You gonna dig him til the day you die."
Submitted by Khensu Hetep on August 6, 2008 - 3:41am.
I've always said that I want a straight guy who acts gay :-P
I prefer the 'REAL deal'. I want a gay man that can be straight enough to give me sexy times, do my hair and decorate my house. Is that too much to ask? Sheesh!
I've always said that I want a straight guy who acts gay :-P
So whose cock did you have to suck for that contract, sweetheart?
Submitted by Khensu Hetep on August 6, 2008 - 3:22am.
Anderson Cooper's not a bad looking guy. I usually don't find that kind of guy attractive, but even I have to say he's pretty easy on the eyeballs.
Khensu, it's usually the most well groomed, handsome men that are gay. -Us women get the men that forget to wipe their furry asses enough and leave hash marks on their tighty whities, wipe their mouths with their sleeves, piss around the toilet and not IN IT, masterbate to women who aren't even realistic looking, think nodding is an answer, cry like titty babies over a fuckin' sliver...eh I could go on but I'm not being fair probably and my beloved could probably list a whole shit load of stuff about me so I'll quit while I'm behind. Not that I'm complaining..........much.
I'm going to have to agree, but it's warped that she still looks the least haggard in the family. Dina Lohan looks like a mummy with hair, and Lindsay looks like a 35 year old hooker.
Anderson Cooper's not a bad looking guy. I usually don't find that kind of guy attractive, but even I have to say he's pretty easy on the eyeballs.
So whose cock did you have to suck for that contract, sweetheart?
Night Boomsy.
I'll try to keep the peace. I'm getting a lil' tired myself. No not really. I wish. I'm wide freakin' awake. lmao!
See you later. Sweet dreams.
You know what is amazing about Anderson? He can raise his eyebrows times 4! Holy crap! That's talent.
All right; my dog is running up and down the stairs which I think means it's time for bed, so good night peeps. Keep the stalking to a minimum, ok?
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Simplicity provides a fine line between eloquence and plainness. -LL Cool J
Hmm...I'll have to get back with you on that one.
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Simplicity provides a fine line between eloquence and plainness. -LL Cool J
Submitted by boomsy on August 6, 2008 - 2:13am.
lol! In all honesty I'd take sloppy fifth's seconds just so I could say I was there...! You want the top or bottom half? lol
Sweetie, I have no problem taking sloppy seconds on this one...trust.
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Simplicity provides a fine line between eloquence and plainness. -LL Cool J
Submitted by boomsy on August 6, 2008 - 1:52am.
boomsy, just for the record (and because nobody called it yet) I have dibs on the first tea-baggin'.
OMFG I LOVE HIM. He just says what I'm fuckin thinking. He's mine.
I'm gonna marry him. Eventually.
I always thought that Anderson Cooper was great, but (forgive me for cursing) he is officially FUCKING AWESOME!!!!! I'm so glad someone had the balls to go on national television and say what we've all been thinking; he's my new hero.
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Simplicity provides a fine line between eloquence and plainness. -LL Cool J
I can't respect the opinion of anyone who chooses to be untrue to himself. Stop living a lie. Come out of the closet already. Christ. Lindsay has more courage than you.
brilliant!
"oviously they are a multitalented family"
is kelly serious? how much did white oprah pay her to say this?
love anderson just love him. keep telling it like it is Mr. Cooper!
___________________
"When it comes to men, don't pay attention to word they say, but pay attention to absolutely everything they do".
Professor Randy Paush
perfection...
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butt sex can lead to ass babies...be sure to use a condom...
Sigh . . . Anderson Cooper watches Project Runway. All men pale in comparison to this delightful demi-god. Please make room while I swoon some more.
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" . . . this is what we call the floating world . . .” (Ryoi, c.1661)
Submitted by Pernicious on August 5, 2008 - 6:41pm.
Why are the good ones always gay?
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Ain't dat da troof? We need "straight pill"...ooh, and a "gay pill". for the straight assholes...
Yes, peeps, this is the solution...We keep the gays we love as gays, hairdressers, interior decorators and the like...Ok, they are gay safe because they just need gayness...
Now, the HOT ones? No gayness needed...we slip them a mickey, the "straight pill" in their appletini...and...YES! We have some surf and turf here people! Sausage/tuna over load!
(and my asshole ex is cruisin' truckstop bathrooms for some Hershey highway via that "gay pill" I slipped his ass in his damn Budweiser...AHAHAHAHAHAH!)
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Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...
1) completely agree with everything he said!!
2) completely agree with the suggestion of him as Hot Slut!!! (of a lifetime!!)
3) totally want to join the fag hag polygamy cult with MK & AC!!!!!! YUM!!!!!
You know ACoop is a good reporter, he described that show with such accuracy I couldn't have said it better.
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"And you gonna find it how? What you got,
a divining rod tattooed on your ass?" - Theodore Bagwell
Submitted by Momus the Sarcastic on August 5, 2008 - 6:12pm.
Submitted by Tigerlilly on August 5, 2008 - 4:04pm.
Coops pewter pate would go so well with your platinum coat. No clashing, just a lovely complement.
MK, however, is a different story. Though, his dark locks could be a nice contrast to the silvery beauty of you and Coop.
;)
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Ahh...me and Coop...running hand and paw through a field of wild flowers, enjoying a pic-a-nic of the finest wine and goose liver pate...gossiping like school girls and doing each other's hair...Ahhh...yes...
I dunno it still wouldn't be the same without MK's bong hits, Purple Drank, and Funion farts...Call me a romantic, but I'm for the threesome...
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Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...
God bless Anderson Cooper. That was stellar.
"Maybe that was in the episode I didn't see"
If Anderson ever needs a hot beard he can call me anytime. This clip is awesome
Submitted by Velveeta on August 5, 2008 - 7:59pm.
Holy fuck. I second Andy for Hot Slut of the Week.
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Are my eyes deceiving me or does P Price look 25% better than usual?
"Now his failure is complete"... Darth Vader
Submitted by Tigerlilly on August 5, 2008 - 6:04pm.
MK and Andy must both marry me now...I'm going to be the first fag hag to have her own gay polygamist cult!
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I like it. And I assume Michael K is signing up now...
Holy fuck. I second Andy for Hot Slut of the Week.
LOVE this hot bitch!!!
When Anderson says 'gayelle' and 'lucite heels,' I will then know that his heart belongs to MK and he wants to be his 'boo.'
<3-------------------------------<3
RIMADYL KILLS
Rest In Peace, baby boy
I love you
Anderson talking about Ali: "She wants to be a singer, or an actor performer or a striptease"
LMAO
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Dick happens! - MK
Why are the good ones always gay?
MK,
Run your ass to city hall and apply for the marriage license. Don't forget to stop at Cartier, I have the feeling he likes the bling.
With Love and Concern,
EEG
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
pathetic is chatting with bitch of crazy mouth
Funny Bitch LoLo as FLA
HOLY COW! Anderson Cooper is "da bomb".
Totally cool guy. Now I understand what Doogie Howser sees in him.
I want to be a HOT gay guy and seduce Anderson.
LOL
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Pretty looks fade...dumb is forever -- Judge Judy
Holy shit, that was fantastic.
"Allegedly 14-year-old" girl. Hahahaha!
☠
"That was the most ludicrous pack of verbal peanut butter buttfuck I have ever read." ~DebFrmHell
http://www.myspace.com/zoloftpony
This Queen did not survive on the "dangerous front line" in Iraq. His stylists and hair people tussled up his hair to look make him look like a foreign correspondent.
I would like to buy this guy a cup of coffee.
"Now his failure is complete"... Darth Vader
I love this man! *jumping on couch*
Andersen Cooper is a god to me, for this clip alone he will be a god to me forever.
Submitted by Tigerlilly on August 5, 2008 - 4:04pm.
Coops pewter pate would go so well with your platinum coat. No clashing, just a lovely complement.
MK, however, is a different story. Though, his dark locks could be a nice contrast to the silvery beauty of you and Coop.
;)
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I didn’t say that it was your fault – I said that I was going to blame you.
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MK and Andy must both marry me now...I'm going to be the first fag hag to have her own gay polygamist cult! Except I won't make bitches believe weird shit... well, except that I am God, and God likes her cooter serviced every now and then, OTHERWISE YOU GO TO HELL SODOMITES!, but that's not really weird...It's just a little harmless sexual extortion...What? Like you've never done it...Pfffft...
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Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...
Wow Andy comes off being this serious journalist, who would have known he was a big bitchy queen??? Most straight men would never watch E! or think Project Runway was educational. I know he's gay but who knew he was so fierce *finger snap*
It really was like he was having lunch with the girls. He's like every girls best gay friend.
I really hope WO responds. It will be so funny watching her go up against Mr. Upper East Side.
Submitted by BRADIFUL BITCH on August 5, 2008 - 6:12pm.
I gathered as much. How do they keep getting back in I wonder...new name etc I guess, huh?
That's it! I'm marrying Andy Coopey!!!!!!!
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People Suck!
Ya .. I don't care that I am a girl and he is gay .. I would totally let Anderson f*ck me in the ass. Hell .. I could put on a strap on and f*ck him, too. I seriously love this motherf*cker!!