Thursday, July 24th 2008

A Must Read

File this under: Screech, you make my dreams come true! NY Mag's Vulture reports that Dustin Diamond is writing a "Saved by the Bell" tell-all called "Behind the Bell."

Screech and his ghostwriter, Alan Goldsher, plan to fill the book with stories about "sexual escapades among cast members, drug use, and hardcore partying." And he's just talking about Mr. Belding in that description. You know that bitch was trouble.

Dustin played Screech for 13 years. He also had a sex tape and almost lost his house. He later confessed to lying about the "losing his house" thing.

Seriously, I don't really like reading books, but I can't wait to read this shit. I hope Screech devotes an entire chapter to A.C. Slater and Zach Morris' private "workout sessions."

In the infamous words of Jesse Spano: "I'm so excited...I'm so excited....I'm sooo....scared."

Thanks Stephanie

Posted by: Michael K


findleynb's picture

The sexy times discussed is about Ms. Bliss and Mr. Belding. Rumor also has it sexy times may have taken place between Milo the janitor and Mr. Belding. What hoes.

gucci's picture

I think this guy is pathetic. his acting career is going nowhere so he has to ruin other peoples lives in order to make a few bucks. HAY SCREECH GROW UP, GET A REGULAR JOB AND GET OVER IT!

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Honestly, this girl needs to dig a hole and stick her head in it.
She has no intelligence, no class, no beauty, no charm NOTHING doing for her.

Submitted by Lucy Goosey on Rumor Willis

Does no one else notice his GIANT hands??? Guess those rumors are true!

parkrangerpete's picture

Well he's smart because half of us will buy it. Lol

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it's a fuckin jungle out there

peaches's picture

OOOOOOOOOOOOO I can't WAIT for this shit!!! Anyone who saw celebrity fit club knows how shameless he is!!! Well "Saved by the Smell" proved that too, now didn't it!

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*I used to Love Celebrities, now I just love to Hate them!*

Chicaloca's picture

Hes such a bitch

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I'm always gonna be me and I'm always gonna be real so, you love it or hate it :-)

letinstar's picture

so...in other words, dd's porn tape is not a bestseller...
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butt sex can lead to ass babies...be sure to use a condom...

Noelegy's picture

I never watched that show, and this guy is the reason. I simply couldn't let something that annoying and ugly appear on my television.

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Hell is full of ten-year-olds who wanted exactly the same thing!

TT99's picture

Finally we'll know truth about the what really happened behind the scenes, but from Screech's point of view. I think we ALL know it's time to set the record straight.
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"I'll go unlock the kids and make us all breakfast." - Theodore Bagwell

TheBreakdown's picture

Everyone else from the 80s and 90s seems to be getting a check, so why not him?

'Heaux Confessionals'
www.myspace.com/triston

yucko's picture

Not that I'd give a shit anyway, but I couldn't live with myself if I thought I would be contributing any kind of monetary help to this megadouche.

paris herpes's picture

I'm totally reading this book, A.C. and Zach's private "workout sessions" are something that I salivate just thinking about it! MMMMMMMMM!!!

Your face!

Albatross's picture

OMFG - this is going on my wish list, STAT!

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I love twinks! ;)

angel_i's picture

Submitted by Mrs.Kravitz on July 24, 2008 - 1:41pm.

I heard his, ya know, "thing" was, like, HUGE.
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What thing, Mrs. K? His nose? ;P

♥ ThreadKilla! / Lean Like a Chola / She's a Lady.
Miss American Dream.

angel_i's picture

@DeeDee:

I knew that! I think Mike D. prolly sucked all the hotness out of his whole family - all dem Beastie Boys are an anomaly of hotness, really.

and
Submitted by parissucksliterally on July 24, 2008 - 1:08pm.

13 years? that crap show was on that long?
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Seriously, dude. I had forgotten all about it when I saw an epi one day with Screech as the teacher or principal or some shit. I said it right out loud: Aw HELL NO! But there it was. Go figure.

♥ ThreadKilla! / Lean Like a Chola / She's a Lady.
Miss American Dream.

one square's picture

i will buy this book and read it cover to cover. must read of the year! behind the bell, lol.

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i am courtney love's original face.

☆ Shonathan Hilton ☆'s picture

i never watched the show
but its intesting to know what happened behind the scenes
i dont like reading either

www.MySpace.com/ItsJonaBitch

I will buy the book but put another cover on it. Then I will donate it to the library. Deny I have ever read it at all. I can't wait to read the secrets.

angry mom's picture

Lisa Turtle was the hottest bitch of them all!
I always thought the the best couple was her and Zack when I was young.
God I'm lame.

MK, if you hate reading books so much you should just hire a "ghost reader" to read that shit for you...there, problem solved.

BTW, I hate Screech.

Mrs.Kravitz's picture

Submitted by oklahoma on July 24, 2008 - 10:51am.

that's right, doll!
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Plus if your partner shave too you can oil your asses up and play slip and slide with your wang and your connie chung hole.

DeeDee's picture

Submitted by jim on July 24, 2008 - 12:38pm.
I still watch that stupid fukcing show sometimes in the morning. I always knew a.c. and zach were fucking each other in the ass. WHY DID THEY DRESS LIKE THEY WERE GOING TO A FUCKING WEDDING IN THAT SHOW, WEARING FUCKING SWEATERS AND BUTTON UP SHIRTS TO FUCKING JR. HIGH SCHOOL!!
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LOL Not to mention they ripped off the sweater idea from Dr. Huxtable.

☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺
Fame was like a drug, but what was even more like a drug were the drugs. ~Homer Simpson

oklahoma's picture

Mrs K.. Yes, His curly top hat head is big! What else could you mean.. *blushes* NO Not that! Fresh!!!

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Pop pills, Pills I pop, Pop two pills
On stilts I walk; Snort two lines that were filled with chalk; Thought I was incredible and killed the hulk;

Margo's picture

He always claims that he's misunderstood. Like cancer, maybe.

mike's picture

I'll pass and wait for the "Adventures of Pete and Pete" tell-all.

Green Is Good's picture

How is it this guy had a steady job for 13 years, but he's now dead broke?

BRADIFUL BITCH's picture

Nice, drop dime on everyone to make a buck because you couldn't/wouldn't try to get some skills and work in the real world.

On that, I want to know if Kelly and Jessie were gayelle for each other.

/\
Madolyn: What do you expect coming in here?
Billy Costigan: I have to come here.
Madolyn: I know you have to come here, but now that you're here, what do you want?
Billy Costigan: You want the truth? Valium.

Mrs.Kravitz's picture

I heard his, ya know, "thing" was, like, HUGE.

-☮'---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮-
Plus if your partner shave too you can oil your asses up and play slip and slide with your wang and your connie chung hole.

Sayonara's picture

Submitted by Margo on July 24, 2008 - 1:21pm.
I loved him on Celebrity Fit Camp when Harvey was going to whup his ass! Good times.
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Dustin got scared! LOL

"Now his failure is complete"... Darth Vader

Silvara0428's picture

Nothing could be more boring than a fugly loooooozer who thinks he's not.

Euphoria's picture

This douche will stop at nothing to revive his long-spent expiration date. He grosses me out so badly, I can't stand to even look at him. And I don't want to see no stinkin' sex tape of him, neither.

I still watch that stupid fukcing show sometimes in the morning. I always knew a.c. and zach were fucking each other in the ass. WHY DID THEY DRESS LIKE THEY WERE GOING TO A FUCKING WEDDING IN THAT SHOW, WEARING FUCKING SWEATERS AND BUTTON UP SHIRTS TO FUCKING JR. HIGH SCHOOL!!

Me thinks he is a weeeeee bit jealous of Big Bad Mario Lopez' success (what success?!?) and figures "Bring em all down!"

oklahoma's picture

Speed!

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Pop pills, Pills I pop, Pop two pills
On stilts I walk; Snort two lines that were filled with chalk; Thought I was incredible and killed the hulk;

lovehaight's picture

That picture is so awesome. I can't wait for this book!

Ooh Slater, hold me tighter! That pig!

www.ilovehaight.blogspot.com

thlayly5's picture

It's not speed- I swear- I just saw this episode.

When I was little, I thought she took a real bad drug, but it really was just caffeine pills. I remember laughing at the episode just a few months ago because it was so tame, and the music video is uber lame.

"To alcohol! The cause of and solution to all of life's problems!"-

DeeDee's picture

Submitted by silvarga on July 24, 2008 - 12:20pm.
Wait. I'm confused: That link seems to confirm that Dustin Diamond is NOT Mike D's brother.
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Exactly! :)

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Fame was like a drug, but what was even more like a drug were the drugs. ~Homer Simpson

In the infamous words of Jesse Spano: "I'm so excited...I'm so excited....I'm sooo....scared."

OMG! I totally love that episode where Jessie gets hooked on speed and sings that song as she collapses in her friends' loving arms--my fave part!! Too funny

Margo's picture

I loved him on Celebrity Fit Camp when Harvey was going to whup his ass! Good times.

silvarga's picture

Wait. I'm confused: That link seems to confirm that Dustin Diamond is NOT Mike D's brother.

thlayly5's picture

It wasn't speed- it was, gasp, caffeine pills. Such a hardcore drug user!

And she drank several cups of coffee a day, even though she hated it! Rehab for Jesse!

"To alcohol! The cause of and solution to all of life's problems!"-

oklahoma's picture

LMAO at MK for saying those words like Jesse.. When she took speed or some shit, to try to stay up to do homework and learn a routine.. LAME.. Amatuer is what she is! I'm sooo scared.. *cries*

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Pop pills, Pills I pop, Pop two pills
On stilts I walk; Snort two lines that were filled with chalk; Thought I was incredible and killed the hulk;

Sayonara's picture

Submitted by DeeDee on July 24, 2008 - 1:10pm.
Dustin Diamond is a putz. Lisa Turtle = Hotness

Notoriousrem_22 on July 24, 2008 - 11:58am.
13 years as Screech...Yup that will do it to ya.
It will forever boggle my mind as to how Dustin is Mike D from the Beastie Boys brother.

My brain refuses to believe this, so I Googled it:
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Thanks DeeDee because I didn't want to believe that one.

"Now his failure is complete"... Darth Vader

parissucksliterally's picture

THANK YOU DeeDee....I refused to believe that rumor....whew!

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Long distance, don't talk about ex-girlfriends; don't talk about you without me, don't talk about the past
-No Doubt "In My Head"

Notoriousrem_22, someone had told me loooong ago about him being Mike D's brother, but I never heard it mentioned again. I even wondered if it was true... he he.. and now you confirmed it. Hard to believe... wonder how Mike D feels about his lil' bro...?

Ha ha.. Ok, nevermind, just read that Googled piece of info!

ISprainedMyUvula's picture

C'mon- we all know that Tori Spelling had nerd girl sexytimes with Lisa Turtle.

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"There's a little bit of asshole in every nice guy, and there's a little bit of genius in every moron." - RDJ

DeeDee's picture

Dustin Diamond is a putz. Lisa Turtle = Hotness

Notoriousrem_22 on July 24, 2008 - 11:58am.
13 years as Screech...Yup that will do it to ya.
It will forever boggle my mind as to how Dustin is Mike D from the Beastie Boys brother.

My brain refuses to believe this, so I Googled it:

http://ask.yahoo.com/20050610.html :)

☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺
Fame was like a drug, but what was even more like a drug were the drugs. ~Homer Simpson

parissucksliterally's picture

13 years? that crap show was on that long?

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Long distance, don't talk about ex-girlfriends; don't talk about you without me, don't talk about the past
-No Doubt "In My Head"

Jinxy McDeath's picture

Turns out, everyone in the cast has said that they were all friends...except for Dustin. After watching him FLIP the fuck out like a loser who has a chip on his shoulder, I don't blame them for excluding him. Accordingly, his book is likely just a bunch of bullshit.

weenielover's picture

now HE could nurse a baby...freak.